If I think about the top best seducers I have known that are not on this forum:
- One was an IT guy at a local gym who lived in a cheap low-end apartment stocked with a full bar he pulled chicks to. Eventually he knocked up a bartender he had in his rotation and moved to the suburbs with her to work a better IT job and raise their son
- One was a single dad ex-Marine who worked some lucrative private security contracts in the Middle East before he became a cybersecurity guy. So far as I know today though he isn't doing nearly as much career-wise
- One was a single dad barber who gave guys fabulous haircuts and eventually moved states to be closer to his kid
All of these guys was a very good seducer with a 200+ lay count.
I would not say any of these guys was a perfect model of how to live a perfect life.
I would not say "You should aspire to live your life exactly like these guys."
In fact, most of the prolific seducers I have known have had professional and personal lives that were kind of a hot mess.
Likewise, if I think of one of the sharpest guys I know in business, he married a woman who was all wrong for him, who actually took a bite out of his forearm when she caught him cheating, and he still married her and put three kids in her. She cut him off sex-wise and he started the divorce process. When the custody battle did not go his way, he resigned himself to staying with her so as not to lose his kids (they'd be living in different cities and he'd basically never see them).
One of the most legendary NLP sex gurus, David Shade, was supposedly terrible at pickup, or so I have long heard.
You might not realize this if you are not personally exposed to these guys a lot.
This is part of why I have always thought in-field training is important, personally. Not just to see it in the flesh, and have the experience, but also to meet the coach and get a real feel for who this guy really is, and exactly what he is best able to teach you, and where the boundary lines on that are.
If you don't have the funds or aren't geographically nearby to where the good coaches are, you should focus on meeting skilled guys in your area and getting to know them. I talked about that here:
We recently had a younger member of our discussion boards throw something of a temper tantrum there because he’d apparently been desperately trying to get my personal attention, but not succeeded, and became bitter and resentful toward me. I simply haven’t been on the boards a huge amount...
www.girlschase.com
Again, you will not just be learning what to do from the guy, but also that he is human, and where his limitations are.
There is a halo effect that humans give other humans, where if they are perceived as good at one thing, we think they are good at others, and if they are bad at one thing, we think they are bad at others.
Thus guys see a PUA is good at picking up, and say to themselves, "Wow, he must have the whole rest of his life handled too," where more often than not the best guys at picking up are the guys whose lives are just a complete steaming mess. This is not always the case, and we have a lot of guys on this forum who are prolific seducers and also have respectable, well-organized lives (Carousel, Teevster, and many others being good examples of this). But in general, the guys who are most prolific tend to be guys who do not have the desire or ability to hang onto a woman long-term, so they continually replace each woman with a new woman.
Being active in pickup is also extremely time consuming. Even if you only go out a few days a week, if you are also going on dates, and also seeing FWBs / LTRs / mLTRs, you do not have a whole lot of time for anything else.
I have had teachers in business, in sales, in seduction, in working out, etc.
Generally these guys will have advice in other areas too. Sometimes the advice is worthwhile. After all, if the guy knows how to teach, he probably knows how to parse important lessons and pass them along.
However, for him to have amassed deep expertise in an area, it usually means he has focused on that area, and ignored others.
So usually he is not going to have anywhere near as deep or extensive knowledge in these other areas as he has in his area of expertise.
It's why almost every trailblazing seducer fails at business, or gets screwed over. Usually it is the guys who are the protégés of the #1 guy who actually make a business that blows up. I have seen this happen numerous times in seduction. Mystery was the #1 guy in his school (and whatever you think of the guy personally, he DID get laid, and with a lot of very attractive women), but the ones who went on to success were a.) Style, his protégé, b.) Tyler Durden/Owen Cook, another of his protégés, and c.) Nick Savoy, who managed to legally get the Mystery Method company away from Mystery somehow and left Mystery himself out in the cold. Ross Jeffries was the #1 guy in his own school, but it was his protégé, David DeAngelo, who struck off on his own and made it big (after Ross shagged David's girlfriend). The guy I learned the most from had myself and two other protégés who went on to build successful businesses in this space. Two of the three (I'm not including GC, though I think we will get there) were at one time the two most financially successful businesses operating in this space.
The trailblazer is the guy who puts his heart into it more than anybody else, who innovates all kinds of deep new stuff, and contributes invaluable amounts. But because he is so obsessive about it, the rest of his life is very often a mess.
Whenever you decide to learn from a guy, you need to be clear with yourself about what specifically you are learning from him.
Because you are never going to find a guy who is the best guy ever at all the areas you would like to be better at yourself.
Instead, you need to figure out what one (or, very occasionally, two, or
maybe three) areas a guy is good at, and listen to what he has to say there.
And then of course go out and
test that, if it's stuff that can be tested, or if not, check the sources on it yourself or find another way to verify it.
But don't go assuming that halo effect, that just because a guy is good at M, he will be good at N, O, P, Q, R, S, and T, too.
Very often, the guys who are at the extremes of good with one thing are a mess in other areas.
This is just the way it is. Each man has a limited capacity for greatness. The direction(s) he extends that in, and where he spends his Greatness Points, are going to be different (and maybe Guy A has 12 Greatness Points and Guy B has 23 Greatness Points, and each guy can spread those around a little differently, but it'd take 2000 Greatness Points to be the best ever at everything and nobody has more than 25 or 30. So, you pick what you'll be great at... and you're mediocre or you suck at all the rest! Such is life).
Chase
en.wiktionary.org
www.skilledseducer.com
