More 'creepy' daygamers than usual during COVID re-opening

[jackal2020]

I was talking with a female friend. She mentioned that over this last month, a lot more guys were opening her in the daytime than usual. She thinks it's because there's nowhere else to meet people.

I'd add this -- during the period between 'daylight reopening' and 'bars reopening', we'll probably see a lot more random daytime approaching.

Unfortunately, she felt creeped out with the way these guys did it -- one came up behind her and whispered into her ear, "I think you're hot". Another just wouldn't take a hint, despite that she was very clear in wanting to be left alone.

It saddens me to hear that, because she skipped all the way to "approaching is bad. Period." When in reality, it can make a stranger's day when done respectfully.

The moral here is, "stay classy, gents." Obviously you should always be respectful. But it makes even more of a difference right now.

 

[DarkKnight]

It is not about beeing classy or "respectful" ( I dread that word when a girl mentions it, not because I like beeing disrespectful, but because it sounds like nice guy connotations)... It is about beeing an attractive guy and not needy. Clearly those guys who are mentioned above lacked calibration and more.

 

[Starboy]

Yeah I think those guys just don't know when to eject. They try to force something that isn't there. If I open a girl and she walks away without wanting to stop to talk i'm not gonna follow her cuz that's needy and what low value men do. Dudes just be clueless.

 

[Zoro]

Where are you from? I've rarely seen daygaming happen, so to me it's strange to think that there are places where a lot of guys do it, although I know they exist.

 

[foggy]

She thinks it's because there's nowhere else to meet people.

Hmmm, idk. could be argued. couples are meeting online at an all time high the last few years, and the pandemic throws fire on that.

i think that the lockdowns are hurting a lot of peoples mental health, driving them to do creepy, uncalibrated things in public

Where are you from? I've rarely seen daygaming happen, so to me it's strange to think that there are places where a lot of guys do it, although I know they exist.

@J Wick

i used to live in toronto and there be times during the day id be walking up to a girl and then i notice another dude is approaching her at the same time...

another time i noticed a guy in set and went and helped him out

 

[Zoro]

@fog I always imagine gaming in those kinds of cities being a stressful experience and having girls react badly to approaches. I know that would harm my motivation and confidence to do more approaches knowing that she might have just had some bad experiences with being approached.

I had a friend tell me about Budapest being “ruined” by daygamers so badly that he just said hi to girl not even as an approach, just being social and she flipped.

I can’t deny that it makes me hesitate to do some bolder approaches. Although I know that a good calibrated approach is very different than an awkward one.

 

[jackal2020]

Where are you from? I've rarely seen daygaming happen, so to me it's strange to think that there are places where a lot of guys do it, although I know they exist.

I’m in NYC.

I’ve seen a few approaches these last few weeks.

I’ve watched carefully. In my opinion, it is somewhat rare in these approaches that everyone walks away feeling better about themselves. That’s my personal metric for success (tho I can’t help but believe that this helps everyone in the long run.)

Chase had a line in Why Cold Approach Works Better Than Anything Else that goes something like. “When an unattractive man approaches, it’s annoying. When an attractive (and calibrated) man approaches, it’s fate.”

That comes to mind these days.

 

[Will_V]

I’m in NYC.

I’ve seen a few approaches these last few weeks.

I’ve watched carefully. In my opinion, it is somewhat rare in these approaches that everyone walks away feeling better about themselves. That’s my personal metric for success (tho I can’t help but believe that this helps everyone in the long run.)

Chase had a line in Why Cold Approach Works Better Than Anything Else that goes something like. “When an unattractive man approaches, it’s annoying. When an attractive (and calibrated) man approaches, it’s fate.”

That comes to mind these days.

There seems to be a reasonably common belief that daygame in itself is somehow completely unobtrusive and can't really be done badly unless you are overtly aggressive, personally I think that couldn't be further from the truth. When you hear things like "even if it doesn't work out, you'll have made her day" and then you hear "if she's not walking away, don't stop, just hang in there" you know there's some compartmentalized thinking going on. Nobody likes to be in a pressured social situation they couldn't handle, where they have the vague feeling that they are being pursued, are not sure if they should walk away or not, and are left not really knowing what other person's intentions are.

Guys need to accept that daygame is an intrusion that breaks social norms and rules, that a woman may or may not decide that she will accept, as you described. As a general rule (all women not being equal) it requires a high level of deftness and perception to start a good one and exit from a failed one without creating a feeling of distrust and alarm at worst, or confusion and distaste at best.

I don't know what's so hard for some guys to understand about this, it doesn't mean they can't do it, or that everyone has to be perfect at it, but believing that it's 'all good' whatever happens, and that they can just go from 0-100 without building up any foundation whatsoever or having halfway decent fundamentals, IMO is just silly. Nobody tells someone to do a somersault when they can hardly ride a bike, just because there isn't the same level of pain when it doesn't work out (though that's debatable!) doesn't mean the entire process can be circumvented.

 

[dingdong]

Been looking for a graph like that, thank you. Still curious as to more/less cold approaching is going on as the years go by or not. Less real life dating is good news for us seducers. You get more points for approaching. Online dating is on the rise but having spoken with girls, all i heard is complaints about the online dating. That they would go on sooo many dates before they found a dude they wanted. High expectations maybe?

Anyways, let sheep conform to social trends and have their sheep results. And we can just stay doing our thing.

 

[dingdong]

Why Cold Approach Works Better Than Anything Else

A reader comments on "How to Think About Women as You Get More Experienced", linking to a discussion on Reddit where a Redditor asks female members about their thoughts on being approached at random, and whether this is nagging them or annoying them... because he feels guilty about it. Here's...

www.girlschase.com

/thread

 

[dingdong]

It is not about beeing classy or "respectful" ( I dread that word when a girl mentions it, not because I like beeing disrespectful, but because it sounds like nice guy connotations)... It is about beeing an attractive guy and not needy. Clearly those guys who are mentioned above lacked calibration and more.

Yes i would like all incels to stop doing daygame please because they ruin it for everyone else. Just kidding (not really), but like, just as some women will have bad experiences being approached, if they let that shut them off from ever being approached by a cool dude again then i'm sorry but they have a peanut brain the same way if i make an approach and get a bad reaction and think "yep never gonna do another cold approach in my life". I would like for retards to be taken out of all these equations please.

I have reactions everywhere between women being instantly all over me just for making an approach and setting me up with their sister and what not to girls who screamed they are gonna call the police before i even opened my mouth. The girls in the positive side of the spectrum are the reason i do cold approach, the negative girls can take all their diarrhea and go to hell with it they don't even enter my reality which is probably why i get the occassional pissed off girl, probably approached her like 4 times before, but i couldn't in a million years recognize her because if i approached her the other times and she just kept walking or gave some other bitchy response i instantly move on with my life. Idk, i just don't really give a fuck about these girls, i'm sorry. I only give a fuck about the non-bitchy and non-retarded girls.

 

[Velasco]

Lol @ no option for "met in park/grocery store/mall/street." But the rise in "met in bar or restaurant" was interesting. Seems it started to go up around the same time PUA became popular in the mainstream.

 

[DoWhatWorks]

Found the graph very interesting.

Think part of the rise to “meet in bar” is before online dating that was the “sleezy” meet up

With OD though it’s seen as an acceptable alternative due to its plausible deniability

I laughed at Velsaco’s comment, think “met in park” is too far out of people’s reality.

Also to the earlier comments, daygame is not a nuisance 90% of the time if done right.