Nude sending brunette's kinda playing hard to get. What's she up to?

[spear_kin]

Hey! I guess I'm opening this forum.
I'm gonna make a quick summary of the situation:

> Girl I was following on facebook (single mom , hot af , lives 3 hs from my place) likes one of my stories with a great photo of myself.
> I end up chatting with her, she's really into the conversation, and we end up stating that we will eventually get together to meet and we imply sex is happening too.
> We start chatting on whatsapp. Sext very little and share some pictures (I shared a dick pick (good sized just so you know that's not an issue) out of her asking and because she was sendind me pics too).
> Chatting about regular stuff doesn't seem to get her on board in the conversation no more.
> Soon she starts replying with a lot less of frequency and even not answering some stuff. I make her notice it with subtlety and humour, zero neediness.
> Suddenly, this last SAT 1:30 AM she sends me a full nude asking me to draw her a portrait (I'm an artist). I only "liked" the photograph and told her we could try it once we meet. Nothing fancy, but no response.

As I expected, she erased the phorograph today (and didn't respond). Before that all of our pictures were sent on "view 1 time only".

Many times I suspected this woman was just seeking for attention, but it isn't as clear sometimes. I think this could happen if I push her a little more. She's that kind of hot chick that probably gets anything she wants from dudes. Yeah, I'm not that dude.
She probably can't meet right away, since she got her children to take care of and she's far away, so I have to be kind of patient about that.

Do you think I should be pushing this any longer or is she just playing?

 

[POB]

I have mixed feelings about sexting and sending nudes
They can backfire real quick if it triggers any type of regret
(like, they send it in the heat of the moment, then regret it and start to pull back out of shame for their own behavior)

> Suddenly, this last SAT 1:30 AM she sends me a full nude asking me to draw her a portrait (I'm an artist). I only "liked" the photograph and told her we could try it once we meet. Nothing fancy, but no response.

In my book this is a booty call, but even if you were able to "get it" in time, living 3 hours away would make it difficult to meet her

Personally, as it stands, I would shoot her a hail marry text and forget about it...if it happens, fine....if not, well, whatever:
"Hey X, I would love to draw your portrait...but these things are really intimate, so making it from a photo would not make justice to your beautiful figure. My suggestion is we meet for a quick coffee in a cozy place, so we can sit and talk, get to know each other a bit and see if the vibe is there."

P.S. I don't like to meet girls that live more than 1hr from my place..think bad logistics

 

[spear_kin]

I have mixed feelings about sexting and sending nudes
They can backfire real quick if it triggers any type of regret
(like, they send it in the heat of the moment, then regret it and start to pull back out of shame for their own behavior)

In my book this is a booty call, but even if you were able to "get it" in time, living 3 hours away would make it difficult to meet her

Personally, as it stands, I would shoot her a hail marry text and forget about it...if it happens, fine....if not, well, whatever:
"Hey X, I would love to draw your portrait...but these things are really intimate, so making it from a photo would not make justice to your beautiful figure. My suggestion is we meet for a quick coffee in a cozy place, so we can sit and talk, get to know each other a bit and see if the vibe is there."

P.S. I don't like to meet girls that live more than 1hr from my place..think bad logistics

Yeah I'm not a fan of those either but we were already dancing and she seemed totally on the train with me (the sext was just soft things we could do for starters).
I figured I could jokingly make her comfortable by saying that it's fine, I get that it was something made in the heat of the moment, and to not be embarassed (although a 2am nude is a kind of strange shit to send a stranger).

Yeah I evade far away girls, but also one that lives 3hrs away came to my place 2 times last month so that made me a believer.

 

[gameboy]

Well given the time she sent it, if she paties at all she may have been drunk. Or a friend sent it or whatever

 

[POB]

Well given the time she sent it, if she paties at all she may have been drunk. Or a friend sent it or whatever

Or simply bored, horny and needy, then attention seeking

(although a 2am nude is a kind of strange shit to send a stranger).

Super weird...but if she lived close I think you could pull the trigger right there

Yeah I evade far away girls, but also one that lives 3hrs away came to my place 2 times last month so that made me a believer.

Too much trouble IMO
Yesterday I got together with a chick that lives 1h away from me...already thinking about dropping her
I don't like to waste that much time commuting for pussy

 

[spear_kin]

Or simply bored, horny and needy, then attention seeking

Super weird...but if she lived close I think you could pull the trigger right there

Too much trouble IMO
Yesterday I got together with a chick that lives 1h away from me...already thinking about dropping her
I don't like to waste that much time commuting for pussy

Yeah. Thanks for the input.
I still feel this can be flipped. I'd appreciate any further ideas. I haven't texted in two days and will wait until I think it's time, prolly tomorrow.

 

[Will_V]

Hey! I guess I'm opening this forum.
I'm gonna make a quick summary of the situation:

> Girl I was following on facebook (single mom , hot af , lives 3 hs from my place) likes one of my stories with a great photo of myself.
> I end up chatting with her, she's really into the conversation, and we end up stating that we will eventually get together to meet and we imply sex is happening too.
> We start chatting on whatsapp. Sext very little and share some pictures (I shared a dick pick (good sized just so you know that's not an issue) out of her asking and because she was sendind me pics too).
> Chatting about regular stuff doesn't seem to get her on board in the conversation no more.
> Soon she starts replying with a lot less of frequency and even not answering some stuff. I make her notice it with subtlety and humour, zero neediness.
> Suddenly, this last SAT 1:30 AM she sends me a full nude asking me to draw her a portrait (I'm an artist). I only "liked" the photograph and told her we could try it once we meet. Nothing fancy, but no response.

As I expected, she erased the phorograph today (and didn't respond). Before that all of our pictures were sent on "view 1 time only".

Many times I suspected this woman was just seeking for attention, but it isn't as clear sometimes. I think this could happen if I push her a little more. She's that kind of hot chick that probably gets anything she wants from dudes. Yeah, I'm not that dude.
She probably can't meet right away, since she got her children to take care of and she's far away, so I have to be kind of patient about that.

Do you think I should be pushing this any longer or is she just playing?

You're not pacing her at all. For a woman sending a nude is a huuge investment, and your reply by comparison was very low investment. So now she's going to be feeling ultra defensive and wanting to rebalance.
I like what @POB suggested, it massively increases your attainability and recalibrates things. Not normally what we want to do with girls but here is necessary.
Ideally you'd avoid stuff like nudes as it sends the investment scales on a wild ride it often won't recover from.

 

[spear_kin]

You're not pacing her at all. For a woman sending a nude is a huuge investment, and your reply by comparison was very low investment. So now she's going to be feeling ultra defensive and wanting to rebalance.
I like what @POB suggested, it massively increases your attainability and recalibrates things. Not normally what we want to do with girls but here is necessary.
Ideally you'd avoid stuff like nudes as it sends the investment scales on a wild ride it often won't recover from.

Yeah, I get it. But I didn't want to go all in and sell myself cheap.
And we had already shared pictures and talked about meeting, which didn't work at the time.

Still don't know how to handle it but I'm doing it today.

 

[POB]

Yeah, I get it. But I didn't want to go all in and sell myself cheap.

She already made a big investiment that you didn't reciprocate.
Now it's your turn to show interest.

 

[spear_kin]

She already made a big investiment that you didn't reciprocate.
Now it's your turn to show interest.

You got a good point. I didn't think that was THAT big of an investment, because maybe I am just one of a pile of contacts which she teases. Just a hunch from seeing her online behaviour (she's kind of attention seeking obviously).
Okay, I'll move that forward, probably there's more to gain than to lose at this point.

I am kind of going for not showing that much of amusement for the women I'm talking to, I haven't reached a good balance I think...

 

[Rakehell]

Generally don't want to propose a meetup when the context implies you all are gonna fuck.

Like nudes, doing so puts extra pressure on the meetup itself, causing her to flake. Even if you both know what’s going to happen.

Most of the time you want to pivot and introduce the meetup in a way that’s more casual of a value proposition.

Your last text kind of forces her to agree to getting or not agree to getting naked when you all meet up.

If I were you i’d give it some time and reengage starting from zero.

 

[Rakehell]

I only "liked" the photograph and told her we could try it once we meet.

Was also more of a statement that needed to be followed up on, on your part.

When you say something like that you kind of just have to assume she agrees and follow up with something else.

So “we could try it once we meet”, “but only if you promise to be on your best behavior ”

After her response pivot to something else that you can use to close that is more casual and doesn’t explicitly translate to sex.

 

[spear_kin]

Generally don't want to propose a meetup when the context implies you all are gonna fuck.

Like nudes, doing so puts extra pressure on the meetup itself, causing her to flake. Even if you both know what’s going to happen.

Most of the time you want to pivot and introduce the meetup in a way that’s more casual of a value proposition.

Your last text kind of forces her to agree to getting or not agree to getting naked when you all meet up.

If I were you i’d give it some time and reengage starting from zero.

I already went with POB's proposal here.
It didn't work, she just tried to "hey hi" me. I told her that wasn't an answer.

I don't want to come off as pushy but neither to be treated as stupid.

If you got an idea to at least get it off the ground that'd be great. I just made up my mind that the thing's not happening.
Your input on not making it all about sex is handy, although I thought after so much "coming over" talk it was stupid to go that back idk... It's too much mind game for me sometimes.

Now I don't want to get needy or something either. I mean, fuck her, I just know this could be done and want to know how.

 

[Rakehell]

It didn't work, she just tried to "hey hi" me. I told her that wasn't an answer.

Yeah man she’s still open.

If you got an idea to at least get it off the ground that'd be great.

You should start from zero in terms of the previous convo. Forget the nude forget her dodging the meetup.

Restart the conversation and eventually segway back into meeting up when it feels like it makes sense to do so without implying that you all are gonna fuck.

 

[Rakehell]

Restart the conversation and eventually segway back into meeting up when it feels like it makes sense to do so without implying that you all are gonna fuck.

My bad for the multiple posts, it won’t let me edit them.

By restart the convo I mean in the same way she tried to when she “hey hi” ‘d you.

So instead of treating the unsuccessful texts like an ongoing conversation that you have to acknowledge. Treat them in the same way you would a conversation you had in real life days before with someone, and then running into that person again days later.

You’d just “hey hi” and have a different convo.

 

[spear_kin]

Yeah man she’s still open.

You should start from zero in terms of the previous convo. Forget the nude forget her dodging the meetup.

Restart the conversation and eventually segway back into meeting up when it feels like it makes sense to do so without implying that you all are gonna fuck.

Do you think that'll take me anywhere? Ignoring her ignoring? I don't want to be taken for a fool.
Im honestly asking btw

 

[Rakehell]

Do you think that'll take me anywhere? Ignoring her ignoring? I don't want to be taken for a fool.

Depends on what you want out of the situation.

I can see how it seems childish and difficult, it very well might be. The whole point is to go at a pace she can agree with, since even though she sent nudes, she still isn’t completely sold on the idea of meeting up.

To me this is the best course of action if you want to meet her. Even if it seems foolish or like she’s playing games.

 

[spear_kin]

Depends on what you want out of the situation.

I can see how it seems childish and difficult, it very well might be. The whole point is to go at a pace she can agree with, since even though she sent nudes, she still isn’t completely sold on the idea of meeting up.

To me this is the best course of action if you want to meet her. Even if it seems foolish or like she’s playing games.

I don't mind meeting her for a cup of coffee and a stroll or something. Even if it doesn't lead to the bedroom (Obviously I want to have sex).

Maybe she fully push the accelerator and then goes into brakes mode?
Yeah it sounds stupid, letting her get away with doing stupid shit. Although I don't mind fighting teeth and nails if needed.

 

[Rakehell]

I don't mind meeting her for a cup of coffee and a stroll or something. Even if it doesn't lead to the bedroom (Obviously I want to have sex).

That’s fine. It doesn’t matter under what pretense you get her out, as long as it isn't forcing her to validate or acknowledge that, “yes we’re probably going to fuck”.

Maybe she fully push the accelerator and then goes into brakes mode?

No, she didn’t want to explicitly agree to meeting you under the pretense that you created.

Doesn’t mean she doesn’t want to meet you, she doesn’t want to verbally say “yes when we meet ill have you paint my naked body”.

So restart the convo and give her a different excuse that she can agree to.

 

[spear_kin]

That’s fine. It doesn’t matter under what pretense you get her out, as long as it isn't forcing her to validate or acknowledge that, “yes we’re probably going to fuck”.

No, she didn’t want to explicitly agree to meeting you under the pretense that you created.

Doesn’t mean she doesn’t want to meet you, she doesn’t want to verbally say “yes when we meet ill have you paint my naked body”.

So restart the convo and give her a different excuse that she can agree to.

Kind of get it. She proposed that tho. What prevents them to do that kind of stuff?
I already sent her an invite like PBO here suggested, coffe and watch the vibe.
I won't be sending anything else soon.