Ocantu Journal

[ocantu1987]

erghh fucking shit. I slipped in talking to my 48 year old female coworker about my PUA life. I dont know how I did it, but I mentioned it slightly I think I asked if her friend was cute and she said "She wouldnt be interested" I was like "She wouldnt be interested in a Pick-up-artist like me huh lol"

I was joking then she started challenging me saying why the hell do i do what i do, doing approaches and all "you dont have to do that." I challenged her back telling her what I read in a girls chase articles "why women give bad dating advice" I told her she think of me going "direct" on the approach on her and not a guy who she is attracted too (fundamentals and everything) lol

I told her I got 2 numbers last time I daygamed and she look surprised lol Im getting better at this. There is no way i can convince her what i do is worth it unless i pull out alot of lays and numbers, but I dont need to tell her shit.

I quickly left then went back and told her look i want to start over and keep you in the dark about my dating life is that ok with you? she agreed kinda oddly she made a weird face.

We have butt heads about this in the past. I told her off then as well, i said i wouldnt discuss my personal life with her. Well months later here we go again.

I tell her things cause we are real good friends otherwise, just she doesnt agree with me doing PUA. She pushes me toward the social circle game and stuff. Well I can do both social circle and PUA huh? why not.

The only people who understand me are Girlschase.com and my dad. My dad agrees 100% in what I do when I go to the malls and bars. He would tell me if I was wrong im sure of it.

So I will not discuss my personal life/PUA/Approaches with anyone but girlschase.com and my dad. Even my mom disagrees, she tells me be friends first erghh women give terrible advice for dating.

 

[ocantu1987]

Went salsa dancing last night and it was one of the worst nights ever. There were plenty of smoking hot latinas, but none wanted to dance with me. I also didnt drink at all and I approached 3 latinas on the dance floor. Well they must have thought I was drunk or something and 1 girl pushed me away hard on the chest to go away

This really stung the hell out of me and shook my confidence alot. I asked other girls to dance and got 1 cutie with the help of my buddy. There were also members of my dance class there, 1 girl i got a crush on savanna. I introduced myself and invited her to dance right away (she accepted) and I thought it went okay. My buddy later told me she looked really bored dancing with me and I should have talked to her while dancing which I didnt. I talked to her a little while we were sitting and it was real friend zone talk. I like this girl way too much and i feel I need to game other girls in the meantime because my game with her could get needy.

I didnt go alone, but with my new friends, these guys act all high and mighty, but they dont take the time to work on themselves. Couple of them overweight. These guys do not get laid at all. I felt them rub off on me alot. Although one of them is brave and does approach.

I would watch as my drunk friend, the brave one approach girls and get destroyed. I started doubting if it really is possible if you can bring girls home from these type of venues. All the girls defenses were way up.

Man nights like this make me feel like shit. I went to bed and forgot about it, then It hit me to not give up. Eminems song "Till I Collapse" is fueling me and getting in my mind set to not be a fucking quitter.

I did something wrong last night im sure, for one my wardrobe i believe sucked, I had my sleeves unrolled and shirt tucked in with this outfit http://imgur.com/di0CZWy

I relapsed on porn again, but only once.

Confidence was down, fundamentals on my approach on the 3 girls that pushed me was not great

I wore 2 sprays of a super powerful pheromone called "Instant Jerk" , it has been known to repel woman hard as well as attract.

I took a few salsa, bachata bootcamps and realize i need to take more cause I suck.

Getting laid felt like a dream last night. So far away. I think that out of all this time I still havent got laid and I feel something repels women from me.

lessons learned
1. Make some killer gains in the gym. Lifting heavy+nutrition. Wont be slobs like these guys.
2. Take more dance lessons
3. Improve fashion, I didnt wear a fitted shirt last night.
4. get back on nofap. What made me relapse was jerking it to thoughts of a real women on sunday going for the 7 day cycle that mark manson suggested in his book. Well I had killer urges on Wednesday. Go for 90 days!
5. Drop pheromones
6. Been focusing on daygame, but havent read about dance floor game. I felt like i didnt ask women the right way, something felt off. I felt unprepared.

well daygame tommorow

 

[ocantu1987]

something from radeng, put it part of my notes

My dance floor method:

Dance floor opening:
Dance up, in one simultaneous motion, grab hand or elbow lean into girls ear and say "hey your cute what's your name?" This all happens way too fast for her to reject you. Then take a step back and turn your head to the side so she can tell you her name right in your ear. Now, turn back into her and place your hands on her hips and gauge her receptiveness. While at the same time saying, "awesome! Are these your friends?(where are your friends if she's alone)? Point around and smile and be animated. She will say yes or say idk or something. Then say, "hey let's grab a drink and come right back to your friends!" Or something similar that addresses that you aren't taking her away. Here you will get some rejections like, "I'm just gonna stay here" which ain't a bad DAnce floor rejection at all.

Get drinks, dance more, meet friends, dance away from her and come back whatever you want to do!

Dance floor can be harsh but consider rejections a time saver rather than a bad thing or a reflection on you. One of my least favorite places for seduction, but can occasionally yield some quick results!

Best way to treat a dance floor? Just a place to let loose and have fun, every interaction should leave you smiling, ESPECCIaLLy a harsh rejection. Laugh at that shit immediately. home girl just missed out!

Radeng

 

[ocantu1987]

got some constructive criticism from reddit. Usually people are very rude there, but this time they really offered great advice on my fashion and approach to salsa dancing. I wanted to put this here for my notes.

Went salsa dancing last night and I wanted to stay sober cause i had to go to work in the morning. I saw 3 girls dancing together on the dance floor and I went up to them hoping to get a dance, well 1 girl quickly pushed me somewhat hard out of the way. It stung me bad.
Has anyone here had it worse or have the same happen to you? i just started and have been doing daygame, but dance floor game is new to me. Daygame girls are so much nicer imo
Also i think i wasnt dressed nice as no girl wanted to dance with me. hows my fashion? I had my sleeves unrolled and shirt tucked in during all of this http://imgur.com/di0CZWy


Went salsa dancing last night and I wanted to stay sober cause i had to go to work in the morning. I saw 3 girls dancing together on the dance floor and I went up to them hoping to get a dance, well 1 girl quickly pushed me somewhat hard out of the way. It stung me bad.
Dude. This has nothing to do with your clothes. I'm surprised how most of the thread has ignored the most important detail here. You were SALSA DANCING. You don't just walk up to people you don't know, who are dancing with each other at an actual dance event, and hope to get a dance. That isn't a night club you're dealing with. What you did was like walking up to a dude at a LAN party who's in the middle of a match, and try to get into the match by unplugging his control and plugging yours in his computer. To sum up:
While at a dancing event like a salsa dancing night, you ask with your eyes or maybe walk up to a girl and ask them to dance personally.
What you don't do is walk up to people you don't know and try to horn in on their fun. That's seriously vampiric. You're not offering fun at that point, you're trying to take fun away. Of course they're going to respond poorly.
Maybe if you knew those girls beforehand, you could have pulled that off. But not as a complete stranger. Under those circumstances, I could have told you that they would react that way. You were invading and trampling over the etiquette of the place.
Has anyone here had it worse or have the same happen to you? i just started and have been doing daygame, but dance floor game is new to me. Daygame girls are so much nicer imo
They aren't "nicer." It's just different. And also, "salsa night" is NOT the same as ordinary dance floor game. At ALL. Technically, it's EASIER. The trick is that you must take classes. Learn salsa. Meet other followers. Then you have an "in."
Also i think i wasnt dressed nice as no girl wanted to dance with me.
Again, no no no no. Your clothes weren't the problem. If they know you from classes, or you know salsa, that's what they care about. I can show up at a social dance event wearing baggy clothes, unshaven, etc. And girls still line up because I know what I'm doing and because I'm known to the people there.

Clothes are way too baggy. You have potential so you should look up some men's fashion if you want a higher success rate

Having been a frequent social latin/swing/ballroom dancer for about the past five years, I have noticed that your chances of successfully breaking into a group of girls already dancing together on the floor is exceptionally low unless you are really good. The way to get in there is take the rejection in stride, dance with other people and make sure they see you, then you ask her friends to dance. Sometimes, your initial mark comes around, sometimes not. The beauty of dancing is that there are always more women around! As for your fashion, I'd say just keep working on your dancing. I was out one night and a friend of my dance partner came out in a fucking Adidas track suit and running shoes. Proceeded to mop the floor with his insane talent.

Don't take it personal, a lot of the time you came off wrong - they don't know you.
For fundamentals, I'll break it down.
Hair needs work, get some product and style it; I can see you're going for edgy w/ showing tattoos - try an edgy hairstyle; get some inspiration here.
Facial hair is decent, I would leave it alone, maybe try trimming it if you're going for a very edgy hairstyle
Your facial expression doesn't seem carefree, warm and confident at all, please don't tell me you looked like that walking around.
Not going to lie, the shirt and jeans are pretty boring, and baggy - not bad style, kinda conventional guy-going-out, but it's the vibe I'm getting; I love Guess outfits, very edgy and sexy - Express is okay. Wear some red! One of my favorite shirts is red. Make sure you get tighter clothes.

Going to have to agree with this^^^. You look totally average (not that that's bad, it's just nothing exceptional). FYI tucking shirts into jeans SCREAMS old, out of touch dude to me.
Jeans are casual. Never tuck shirts in to jeans. Change pants if you need to tuck your shirt.
You've got a good body OP, get fitted cut shirts if you're going out.

I'm a junior in highschool. Went up to a group of "popular seniors" during a dance. Same thing happened to me, and they kept giving me dirty looks. I agree with everyone, your outfit could've been better. The only thing rejection should do to a person is give them another chance to come back stronger. With even hotter girls!

Laugh about it. It's funny.
I will say that outfit does not seem like one where you want the shirt tucked in and sleeves unrolled. The way you are wearing it in the pic would be much better (minus the wrinkles). Find pictures of styles and outfits you like and copy them until you build your own style. MFA is not a bad place to start.

+1 for the MFA advice, and some people are just like that.
Some people are legit crazy mang.

Did you die? No. Keep going at it and you'll improve.
Try /r/malefashionadvice for some tips on dressing better.

 

[ocantu1987]

Interesting observation ive made at the gym yesterday. There is this guy there maybe @36 years old, swole and has a bunch of tattoos like me. I see him with hot latinas all the time and he was with one with big tits man o man lol.

I go back to what estate told me

The latinas I go for tend to go for the thuggish, baggy clothes wearing, bald faded hispanic gangsters lol.

I used to dress like that and kept my hair buzzed with a fade...hopefully I dont have to return to that. ocantu

I don't really know who wrote it but I remember reading "To get the type of girls you want, be the type of guy she wants to meet".

That doesn't mean change yourself to be someone else. But it goes with fashiom, attitude, everything. Like all those "bombshell" threads. The guys there don't want to be the type of guy she dates because he deems them douchebags. That's fine, but he'll appeal to a different demographic then. I have my style and girls I like but I know one style won't appeal to everyone. As said above, be who you want to be. Estate

I observed this guy as he attracts the type of women I go for. I tell myself that there is really isnt much of a diffirence between me and him except he has way more muscle and better fundamentals.

He has great posture, says very few words, he speaks slow, Deep voice, and he acts like he doesnt give a fuck about the girls around him even though they are hot.

I observe what he wears. He always has a cap on facing foreword just like this one

I always see him in tight tank tops and he occasionally wears "Famous" brand clothing. He wears running shoes with ankle socks and no accessories like a wristband or anynything. Also he always wears basketball shorts that go below his knees.

Im thinking of taking something from this guy as I already am tatted up like crazy. I jam to swishahouse and eminem on my ipod already and I think im more gangsta than I realize. I always thought myself a nerd lol.

I think i will buy this exact cap and try daygaming. I work out like a beast already and just a matter of time until im at this guys level. He must be a good 215 and im only 160 (was 140) haha gotta to make gains.

He sports a bald fade, but I do like having hair and I dont want to do anything drastic. Be who I am, but maybe a few small tweaks. I might as well embrace the inner gangsta in me since my tats aint going away haha

 

[ocantu1987]

FR for my notes

This one happened out of the blue for me. I will try to remember my interaction word for word the best I can so you guys can help me improve. Finished my workout at the gym and had a huge pump, ive been taking C4 and my pumps are just insane haha anyway, I go straight to the pool hall dressed in my gym attire not the best, but you can see the little muscle i got plus a ball cap.

Arrived and played a little to warm up for league play and this guy told me I had to move to another table and thats when I saw this girl who I see come in all the the time. White girl with incredible tits omg thats how i love my women not much of an ass man and I usely prefer them to be latin.

I tell myself i got to talk to her, no exceptions. Ive hold off on talking to her for long enough since she is always with her boyfriend. Ive seen her smile at me one time when I was at the bar a long time ago. She was wearing a dress and sandals, i kept fantasizing about putting her on the pool table and railing her lol.

So i move to the other table and the old man she is talking too asked me what i am doing this is his table. I was cool about it and I already knew this guy a lil bit, but I used this to my advantage and shook his hand introduced myself and I then shook hands with this chick.

Me:Hi Im Oscar *made sure my eye contact was strong*
Her:*smiles* hi im morgan *she gave me great eye contact as well, like she was thinking sexual things haha*
Me: yeah ive seen you around alot, you come here with your boyfriend.
Her: Ex-boyfriend lol!
Me: oh yeah, I played that guy and he wooped my ass haha
Her: haha yeah hes good.
Me: Do you play in the league?
Her: yes i play in the tuesday league
Me: ahh ok

At this moment i leave to continue practicing and later I see her walking near me and I take a chance.

Me: Hey morgan how about a game? *playful smile and eye contact*
Her: oh i dont know I dont have my pool stick with me
Me: its okay ill take it easy on you, ill use a house cue and you can use my cue haha *little sarcasm*
Her: *Her face lit up with a smile* Ill go get my stick!
Me: haha ok

She went back to her car outside the pool hall to grab her pool stick hmmm is this compliance or investment?

Her: ok ready
me: yeah btw do you have a break cue?
her: no i dont sorry sweety *sounded like an old women there*
Her: you see this case it has room for one haha
Me: I see cold blooded huh *didnt make sense*

We started playing and talking, she bent down to take a shot and i looked at her cleavage and she quickly looked at me yikes i dont know if she caught me there omg her tits are fucking awesome yummm lol

Me: so yeah morgan i promise ill take it easy on you haha
her: haha yeah right
Me: So i heard you talking about being a real estate agent?
Her: yeah its a good business lots of money
Me: I bet its lots of work
her: oh yeah

She mentioned her break up with her boyfriend a few times and also mentioned her financial problems. I tried to relate as i too have money problems

Me:So yeah morgan how old are you you look like the same age as me
Her: hmm really *slight smirk on her face*
Her: how old are you?
Me: guess
her: 24
me: wow i guess i look youthful lol
her:haha so how old are you?
Me: 28, so we are about the same age arent we?
her: no, im 24
Me: oops haha I should have said 20 or something lol
Her: *She busted out laughing*

Dont know what exactly brought this up but I think she was cluing me in here.

Her: my friend always ask me to go out to clubs to meet people, but I just come here to the pool hall *she smiled at me*
Me: oh yeah and what do you tell your friend? *She just broke up with her boyfriend and I was trying see if see is on the market*
Her:....*she smiled*

Her: my sister lived with me she is actually a twin not identical.
Me: ahhh she is fraternal then
Her: *She lit up* yes! not many people know that *we high fived lol not rocket science*
Me: one thing I noticed about twins is they are always hanging out, like they are always best friends, i was watching a tv show on vh1 at the gym and they had a get together of all twins and they seperated them to be with other twins and they umm competed for something
Her: ummmm ok lol

Thats twin tv show i mentioned just didnt click, i have this problem i cant really tell a story. I felt no punch line or point to mentioning that tv show as I didnt watch the whole thing at all. She was waiting on the point which I didnt capitalize. Gotta have a point in a story lol she looked at me like an idiot

Her: so she had 2 kids in 1 year and I had to help her out with taking care of them
Me: do you have any kids morgan?
Her: me no im a virgin lol
Me: wait whaa
Her: just kidding

Saying she is a virgin hmmm like a mini sex frame there? didnt have anything witty although I could have said "I like girls that are virgins" to throw in more flirting.

She started asking me questions on what do I do, just told her what i do nothing witty there. Although i took it as an IOI.

She forgot my name earlier in the conversation.

Her: one more time what is your name? lol
me: oh no you forgot my name already haha
her: im sorry
Me: Im oscar *she shook my hand again*

thats about it. I tried to throw in atease here in there while playing but i think i sounded arrogant about my pool game. When we finished playing i went for the number close.

Me: hey morgan hold on
her: yes
Me: can i take you out for a drink sometime?
Her: *she smiled* let me give you my card
Me: card hmmm how about you put your number in my phone
Her: oh ok, here you go
Her: Im not going to lie, i just got out of a bad relationship
Me: *didnt say anything*
Me: well nice meeting you morgan
Her: nice meeting you

texted after i got home @ 10:30pm

Nice meeting a bad ass pool player. save my number morgan -oscar

no reply since haha starting to get negative as ive been on the worst dry spell ever. I havent been laid or had a date in like a year. I asked god please let me bang this girl please haha just kidding

things i did well
I think this girl was into me, her eye contact with me was on the sexual side and i made sure to maintain it while occasional looking away to not look like a weirdo

I was trying more to be myself as reading all these articles has just made my head spin

 

[ocantu1987]

I've been depressed as hell ever since that pool hall girl, I thought she into me a lot, but I haven't heard shit from her.

I went to the mall to daygame, but couldn't bring myself to approach. I am still freaking depressed about pool hall girl and if I'll ever get a girl. I walked that mall and couldn't believe how some of these dorky guys who don't know shit about the gym, have an attractive girl holding hands with. Not to mention that I got zero ioi. I may try a new haircut and improve my fashion when I get on track with my money.

Anyway I'm going to follow what my signature says "if your going through hell, keep going"

 

[Zoro]

Anyway I'm going to follow what my signature says "if your going through hell, keep going"

Good attitude. It's a journey, not a vacation ;}

 

[ocantu1987]

Went out with my friend saturday night with a different mindset. I told myself just go out and have fun, not try to approach. Well I had better reception from the ladies all of sudden.

I was leaving from my first bar and could have swore some hot latinas were saying goodbye to us. At another bar we got to playing pool with some unattractive girls and I was playing real good (part of a pool league). I was on the 8 ball and this girl kept saying im going to grab his cock haha. Same bar a drunk chick just literally told me I was cute as she walked by haha.

When im on the prowl I feel girls ignore me, but when Im not on the hunt they pay attention to me more haha interesting thing. I had a great time just being social with my friends and I also had a bad ass conversation with a russian girl who was not sexy, but still it was a great talk. I also wore a more tighter shirt to show off my gainz in the gym haha

Went to a 24 hour restaraunt and as I walked in 2 latinas were giving me eye contact, and I looked them in the eye, but I didnt smile at them, got to remember to do that next time. My buddy approached these 2 girls who were receptive to us, they practically invited us to their table 1 girl was ugly the other was ok, i let my buddy have her while i talk to the other one. I made some witty jokes that got them laughing. Nothing interesting, my buddy invited his girl to salsa dancing, they seemed unlikely to come home with us, but we didnt ask them to come home with us.

It got me thinking you got to try for the pull even though it seems unlikely. I know when i get a better job ill move to this area, buy a big house, get a pool table, get a bar, maybe a dart board, and just use these excuses to invite them over. Logistics!

Been reading Models by Mark Manson and man i love this book. He talks about how to become more attractive to women step by step. Mainly you must invest in yourself, be less interested in the perception of others than in yourself, Fundamentals that we talk about on girlschase, work out etc.

hes given me some ideas to improve my fashion, starting with a brand new haircut from a salon haha ive used my same haircut for too long time for a change.