Just to +1 what
@West_Indian_Archie said here a little bit...
Do you want to express yourself?
Or do you want to seduce women?
Right now you are doing the former, then scratching your head when it does not accomplish the latter.
Women, when they talk to you, are just "going with the flow." They're just "waiting to see if something happens." If it does, then it "just happened." If it doesn't, then it "wasn't meant to be."
As a man, you can also just "go with the flow", "take the conversation as it comes", "wait to see if something happens", "see if it was meant to be or not", etc. If you do, then you and the woman will be doing the same thing, and unless it's total magic between you, nothing will ever happen. You will spend a long time wondering why "nothing is meant to be."
You are in these conversations with women, and your conversation is quite obviously undirected. You are simply responding without any thought or feeling about "How does this move forward the seduction?" Instead you are just saying whatever comes to mind, like you're talking to some dude you're just hanging out with shooting the breeze, just "expressing yourself." That's fine with a dude you're just hanging out with shooting the breeze with, because you aren't trying to bang him. With a woman, you are trying to seduce her. You can't just "say whatever." You are not seducing.
Here's how it should be going:
HER: [talking about how driven she is]
YOU: [thinking to self: "How can I use this to help the seduction?"] You know what I love about a driven woman? There's just way less BS. She knows what she wants. It's a pretty attractive trait.
Or:
HER: [asks you something]
YOU: [thinking to self: "How can I use this to help the seduction?"] [answers in a way that you think will move the seduction forward]
Or:
HER: [gets upset after you kiss her and accuses you of manipulating her]
YOU: [thinking to self: "How can I use this to help the seduction?"] You're right, I brought you here because I'm attracted to you and I didn't want to keep sitting around in some annoying public place where we couldn't be closer. So here's a question: a moment ago you were telling me I'm a very good kisser. But it seems like your own reaction scared you. So what it is you're afraid of, exactly? I'm not going to bite you. I mean, unless you want.
You don't have to always get it right, and in fact when you start thinking this way you will probably get it wrong a lot and make many dumb mistakes.
But so long as your response is "just say whatever I feel" you are going to continually run into walls with girls because YOUR FEELINGS are obviously NOT ALIGNED with seducing women.
If your FEELINGS were "I love women... I want to seduce women... everything women say is silly and cute... I just want to get women into bed, I know they're happiest when with me... but I have to find out if this girl is cool, too... I need to make sure this chick is worthy to be with me... which means she needs to jump through a few hoops I set up for her to show me she has the kind of seductive qualities I am looking for... I don't want to make it too hard for her, of course, but I can't make it too easy... it's my job to lead her through things; I'm the ring master..." -- if your feelings were that, then you could just say whatever you felt and what you said would seduce, because your feelings are in alignment with what you're supposed to be doing.
The stuff in this thread happens because your feelings are not in alignment with seduction, but you are saying what you feel, so the things you say take you farther away from seduction instead of closer and closer to it.
You are going to need to go through a period where, SINCE YOUR FEELINGS ARE OUT OF ALIGNMENT WITH YOUR OBJECT, you ask yourself how you SHOULD respond, then try to respond that way.
Over time, as you test responses, and stumble on ones that work, and get good feedback from those, and accrue more and more very positive experiences with women, your feelings will start to align more and more with the nature of seduction, and you can more often just say whatever you feel like, because what you feel is increasingly in alignment with what you aim to do (i.e., get this woman naked into bed).
Until then, you need to stop saying stuff that blows up your sets and start asking yourself what would move things forward, rather than "how can I be true to myself the same way I would with a guy I wasn't trying to bang?"
Girls you want to seduce are not guys you don't want to bang. They are girls you want to seduce. You need to treat your conversations with them not as vehicles for self-expression but as vehicles for seduction -- at least until your internal state when you are with women gets so aligned with what seduces women than you can just say whatever and it turns girls on, that is.
At that point, you will be free to express yourself to your heart's content, and girls will climb all over you because of it.
Until then: look for stuff to move things forward, not for "being true to yourself."
Also, read this article:
About a day ago, we had a commentator on the post on how to become romantic who weighed in to let me know that it's silly to try and get better with people, and that most people have better things to do, and that in fact you really should just be yourself, and anyone who doesn't realize how...
www.girlschase.com
Chase