Calls & Texts  Texting after cold approach: logistics only?

Francis

Tool-Bearing Hominid
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Mar 27, 2023
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As someone who can type really fast and tends to slip into writing too much, the “14 ways to text” article has helped me a lot. For example, after one first day lay, I locked in the second meet with just a same-night had-a-great-time text, and a follow up a few days later with consideration and a schedule check. Sprezzatura at its finest.

Now for cold approach, I assume the best way is to discuss a date in person, then continue that thread over texting. It seems Chase recommends some level of consideration and new information about your week or whatever, but it’s always like “hope you had a great whatever” or “hope your whatever went well” posed as statements rather than questions, and always combined with a schedule check.

Now if for some reason you weren’t able to seed the date in person, what’s the move? @Skills has an old thread recommending to start with banter/repartee, not going for much investment with rapport building questions from the start, and definitely not doing a schedule check with the early texting.

So how are you guys texting between cold approach and the first date? What about if there’s some flaking happening or she goes on vacation in between? Do you just keep pinging her with persistent non-needy date requests spaced out by a few days or a week, etc.? Or do you hold off on the date requests for a bit and actually get into some conversation?

Then there’s some girls I’ve been seeing who send walls of text and want to chat all fucking day, but that’s a whole nother story. I get a lot of complaining about how I only text to make plans, feelings of being disconnected from me for a whole week, etc.
 

Chad Tyrone

Tool-Bearing Hominid
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Jun 21, 2021
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Now if for some reason you weren’t able to seed the date in person, what’s the move?
You should be asking them out when you are there besides them,,,there in real time.Then get their number. Comes across unconfindent and cowardly doing it over text when you could have done it in person .But there happens times where u got her number and forgot to ask her out before. Give her a call instead. Talk for a bit then ask her out.
What about if there’s some flaking happening or she goes on vacation in between? Do you just keep pinging her with persistent non-needy date requests spaced out by a few days or a week, etc.? Or do you hold off on the date requests for a bit and actually get into some conversation?
Treat flakes as no biggies and do a reschedule .But you can avoid it by sending an anti-flake text. "Still good for today/tonight?", "heading out in a few ...see you at X". This does help in avoiding wasted time were the girl not to show up.

If she goes on a vacation you could send her the check -in text or send her a" no worries, will keep in touch " text or " no worries, text me once you back here." You don't have to keep pinging her ...robs you your scarcity.
Then there’s some girls I’ve been seeing who send walls of text and want to chat all fucking day, but that’s a whole nother story. I get a lot of complaining about how I only text to make plans, feelings of being disconnected from me for a whole week, etc.
I wouldn't worry about this as long as the two of you are having a good time when you meet. You are not their text buddies. You could break some rules say flirt or banter with them for a little bit then cut the convos short. If they keep complaining about stuff then u could tell them that you value real life conversations more than you do text ones. Again don't overprovide good feelings. They should enjoy you in person;)


Chad Tyrone
 

Skills

Tribal Elder
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Joined
Nov 11, 2019
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4,212
Location
South Florida
As someone who can type really fast and tends to slip into writing too much, the “14 ways to text” article has helped me a lot. For example, after one first day lay, I locked in the second meet with just a same-night had-a-great-time text, and a follow up a few days later with consideration and a schedule check. Sprezzatura at its finest.

Now for cold approach, I assume the best way is to discuss a date in person, then continue that thread over texting. It seems Chase recommends some level of consideration and new information about your week or whatever, but it’s always like “hope you had a great whatever” or “hope your whatever went well” posed as statements rather than questions, and always combined with a schedule check.

Now if for some reason you weren’t able to seed the date in person, what’s the move? @Skills has an old thread recommending to start with banter/repartee, not going for much investment with rapport building questions from the start, and definitely not doing a schedule check with the early texting.

So how are you guys texting between cold approach and the first date? What about if there’s some flaking happening or she goes on vacation in between? Do you just keep pinging her with persistent non-needy date requests spaced out by a few days or a week, etc.? Or do you hold off on the date requests for a bit and actually get into some conversation?

Then there’s some girls I’ve been seeing who send walls of text and want to chat all fucking day, but that’s a whole nother story. I get a lot of complaining about how I only text to make plans, feelings of being disconnected from me for a whole week, etc.
I explain what to do here: https://www.skilledseducer.com/thre...aving-sex-with-a-girl-for-the-1st-time.24545/

Texting for logistics is low odds, but you can see for yourself....
 
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