I am a 37 year old man who is still struggling with approaching girls. I am a good looking man, fit, tall, blond hair, blue eyed gem. I am easy to talk to, funny, confident, proud and caring. I am moderately financially successful though working hard to remedy any issues in that area. I do pay a mortgage and ride a kick ass motorcycle. So where do my troubles come from? When I think about my history with girls well it's fairly obvious that I bought into some bullshit believes. I lost my virginity when I was about 23 to a girl I wasn't attracted to. Before that I had never told any girl that I was attracted to them after the one experience when I was like 13. A sweet girl kissed me while we were playing hide and seek. The next night we were on a group camping trip and I proclaimed my love for her at the suggestion of an older kid and everyone heard it. Needless to say the note came and the next 23 years I lived with a fear of rejection. After my first sexual experience I did not attempt again until I was 35 and boy did I chase the girl I had my eyes on but I don't mind I got exactly what I was going for.
Today I have a realization that I absolutely have to get my issues resolved if I am going to achieve another level of success. I set out this morning with the thought when I saw someone I was attracted to that all I needed to do was make eye contact, give her a compliment, engage in small talk and ask for a number. Needless to say I approached a lot of girls and came up with reasons at the last minute to not say anything and walk on by. I returned home feeling defeated, like I had really let my self down and for good reason. I opened a beer sat down and turned the TV on, that was something I had not done for months. Feeling defeated before I even finished my beer I got of the couch, jumped on my motorcycle and set of to find someone, anyone I thought was attractive to talk to. Rejuvenated with a since of purpose I first stopped by the grocery store and didn't see anything I liked then headed to the park. There was a lot of people there mostly young adults. I walk around for a few minutes when I spot a cute girl I thought was attractive pushing a stroller and I though here is my chance. In an attempt not to get ran over by her and say something I said "cute baby" she said thanks then I said "cute mom" and she looked back and smiled and kept walking it was a start. Then I spotted another girl in a pink shirt and said I'm going to approach her and 20 feet away she pulls out the cell phone and starts talking and I walk on by. I walk for a ways then turned around and started heading back to my bike. I spotted her again and said hello. Complimented her and then was interrupted by the sister that was there to meet her and I continued back to the bike. Then I ran into another girl and again said hello, complimented her and attempted to help her find a water fountain because that's what she said she was looking for but it really wasn't. I went back to my bike drove around the park and asked the same girl if she wanted to go get a drink she said no thanks.
So whats the point you might be asking? I needed to tell someone my resolve and how I have to get this part of my life figured out fast. I can no longer put it off! and I couldn't sleep. Tomorrow I will talk to another three girls. If you read this thanks!
Today I have a realization that I absolutely have to get my issues resolved if I am going to achieve another level of success. I set out this morning with the thought when I saw someone I was attracted to that all I needed to do was make eye contact, give her a compliment, engage in small talk and ask for a number. Needless to say I approached a lot of girls and came up with reasons at the last minute to not say anything and walk on by. I returned home feeling defeated, like I had really let my self down and for good reason. I opened a beer sat down and turned the TV on, that was something I had not done for months. Feeling defeated before I even finished my beer I got of the couch, jumped on my motorcycle and set of to find someone, anyone I thought was attractive to talk to. Rejuvenated with a since of purpose I first stopped by the grocery store and didn't see anything I liked then headed to the park. There was a lot of people there mostly young adults. I walk around for a few minutes when I spot a cute girl I thought was attractive pushing a stroller and I though here is my chance. In an attempt not to get ran over by her and say something I said "cute baby" she said thanks then I said "cute mom" and she looked back and smiled and kept walking it was a start. Then I spotted another girl in a pink shirt and said I'm going to approach her and 20 feet away she pulls out the cell phone and starts talking and I walk on by. I walk for a ways then turned around and started heading back to my bike. I spotted her again and said hello. Complimented her and then was interrupted by the sister that was there to meet her and I continued back to the bike. Then I ran into another girl and again said hello, complimented her and attempted to help her find a water fountain because that's what she said she was looking for but it really wasn't. I went back to my bike drove around the park and asked the same girl if she wanted to go get a drink she said no thanks.
So whats the point you might be asking? I needed to tell someone my resolve and how I have to get this part of my life figured out fast. I can no longer put it off! and I couldn't sleep. Tomorrow I will talk to another three girls. If you read this thanks!
You can if you want have your post moved to the journals board (ask Franco) since the journals board is meant for this kind of thing. Or the FRs (Field Reports) board is good for a casual report other than as part of a self-improvement journal. Anyway, welcome. I was in much the same situation as you and now my life has improved a lot.
