What is a strong man?

[Arnav]

My takeaways from reading material on girlschase from vatious writers has been that girls love strong men and are devoted to them.

Could someone explain and define what they mean by a strong man?

I ask this because my experiences and observations have run contrary to this. What I have observed is girls gravitating and being devoted to feminine, gracefull and nonchalant guys rather than tough mascuiline assholes, the kind of guys like - zac effron, joe jonas, harry styles

I recently came across this girl incredibly sexy and charming. She was with a guy who was a tough, asshole biker dude who would seemed like the classical definition of strong guy - tough manly, alpha loudmouth who would rage or fight at the slightest sign if disrespect. He would never back dow from arguments with this girl, seemed quite dominating with her . I saw this girl cheat him with a guy who did not seem tough or manly quite the opposite - more effiminate and charming.

Do I have the definition of a strong man wrong?

 

[KJ Francis]

Great question. There are some good articles on this topic with terms like "better than jerk", "genuine man". Searching "asshole" will help find them.

I think of it like there are two factors:
1. Prioritizing yourself over her
2. Making her feel good

I think of #1 like a prerequisite, though it can feel unnatural if you were raised to be polite. Basically you do not do things you don't want to do in order to have a chance with her. Otherwise it shows you don't have options and therefore can't uphold standards. I think you can still be effeminate and do this technically.

Then #2 can win the girl. So as long as you have enough baseline #1 (and relative dominance and all that can affect attraction, her orgasming, etc), then #2 is what's important in the moment with her.

Celebrity relationships may not be the best to look at as real life.

Edit: looking at Joe Alwyn vs. Travis Kelce is pretty interesting though. Maybe Taylor needed a comforting escape from her hectic life, but she has different levels of giddy, hanging off him, etc. My guess is it's from orgasms. And he made her a friendship bracelet with his phone number.

 

[Hue]

There is plenty of GC for you to do further research on what a "strong man" is so that's mostly on you.


In regard to the feminine men who get girls, some of the ones you name end up combining it with masculinity as they get older. Girls become women and women grow out of wanting the pretty boy.

Take Zac Efron during the highschool musical days. Hot, young, skinny, and energetic. Young girls were obsessed. Zac Efron (his image) now is much more muscular, kinda douchey, and established himself as an actor a bit more.

Look at old Justin Beiber. Little pretty boy, girls were obsessed. Now he's this super rebellious, edgy party boy covered in tattoos and clearly sexualized.

Drake (pussy ass whiney singer) has totally reinvented his image (beard, muscles, swag) to become more masculine as he got older.

All are feminine male celebrities originally that added some masculine features (muscle, rebellion, confidence) to their former "pretty boy" archetype.

Boys aren't strong. Men are, individually and in their own capacities. Even Bieber (or rather, his image) at least had the strength to reinvent himself and tell the world he doesn't care what they think, despite criticism.

People are drawn to that sort of confidence and the strength it brings. Woman are drawn to strength, as long as the man can showcase that he actually has some form of it.

Hue

 

[Tony D]

I think the concept of strong, masculine, alpha, and jerk get tossed around a lot without explaining that many men who wouldn't appear outwardly to fit this bill, still get with the hotter women.

What women are looking for is to feel "safe." That doesn't mean you need to be jacked, but it could mean you lead a small army of devoted men and women. That's why celebrity is so attractive to women. You could be like that dude who plays Frodo... Elijah Wood. He is super short, very feminine, soft spoken, but commands the attention of millions because he's a really powerful, influential guy.

This goes deeper. Check out this vid I made about what "nice guy" behaviours turn women off. It's often less about "being" than "not being".

 

[Arnav]

There is plenty of GC for you to do further research on what a "strong man" is so that's mostly on you.


In regard to the feminine men who get girls, some of the ones you name end up combining it with masculinity as they get older. Girls become women and women grow out of wanting the pretty boy.

Take Zac Efron during the highschool musical days. Hot, young, skinny, and energetic. Young girls were obsessed. Zac Efron (his image) now is much more muscular, kinda douchey, and established himself as an actor a bit more.

Look at old Justin Beiber. Little pretty boy, girls were obsessed. Now he's this super rebellious, edgy party boy covered in tattoos and clearly sexualized.

Drake (pussy ass whiney singer) has totally reinvented his image (beard, muscles, swag) to become more masculine as he got older.

All are feminine male celebrities originally that added some masculine features (muscle, rebellion, confidence) to their former "pretty boy" archetype.

Boys aren't strong. Men are, individually and in their own capacities. Even Bieber (or rather, his image) at least had the strength to reinvent himself and tell the world he doesn't care what they think, despite criticism.

People are drawn to that sort of confidence and the strength it brings. Woman are drawn to strength, as long as the man can showcase that he actually has some form of it.

Hue

Yes, this seems to be usual trend of the pretty boy archetype, adding more edge and domiance as they mature.

I think what seems to be happening is that the pretty boy archetypes that I have witnessed in my experinces all had women really into them and I guess the clearly visible preselection effect was way more overpowering than the classical strong man, alpha energy.

 

[Chase]

@Arnav,

I ask this because my experiences and observations have run contrary to this. What I have observed is girls gravitating and being devoted to feminine, gracefull and nonchalant guys rather than tough mascuiline assholes, the kind of guys like - zac effron, joe jonas, harry styles

I recently came across this girl incredibly sexy and charming. She was with a guy who was a tough, asshole biker dude who would seemed like the classical definition of strong guy - tough manly, alpha loudmouth who would rage or fight at the slightest sign if disrespect. He would never back dow from arguments with this girl, seemed quite dominating with her . I saw this girl cheat him with a guy who did not seem tough or manly quite the opposite - more effiminate and charming.

Do I have the definition of a strong man wrong?

The gym is filled with physically strong men who act tough and alpha but go that route because they are weak-willed and insecure. Not ALL guys in the gym are like this -- but a good portion of them are.

The same is true for "alpha male tough guys" who go around raging over the slightest things, getting into fights, beating people up. Guys who beat people up are guys with something to prove. You don't do that if you know who you are and what you're about. It's pointless.

Guys are ironically the ones who are more impressed with big, strong tough guys than women are. If you look at the studies on how men versus women evaluate men's bodies, women prefer lean, in-shape bodies on men, while guys are most impressed by these gigantic musclemen. The reason why is because women are looking for signs of health, and the most natural-looking physically fit body is the healthiest, whereas men are looking for males who are potential threats, and the biggest guy there is signaling both that he is the strongest and also probably that he prides himself on his strength and toughness above all (and probably is happy to prove how big and strong he is by throttling slighter men).

I can't speak for others (or... maybe I can? I'm pretty sure everyone in the seduction community is going to have more or less the same perspective I do on this), but when I talk about 'strong men' it has nothing to do with physical strength. A cripple can be a 'strong man'. I'm talking about dudes with strong inner strength, who have rock-solid frames, who know what they're about, are able to be chill yet commanding, and are what you might call 'natural leaders'. A guy like this is STRONG. Much bigger men will either hate him or love him, depending on how good he is at magnetizing men as well as women (some guys are better at magnetizing men, some are better at magnetizing women, and some are good at magnetizing both).

This is the kind of strong you want to be if success with women is the goal. Also just social success in general. That big angry biker dude with the cheating girlfriend probably isn't winning a lot of popularity contests, I'd imagine.

See also:

Lovers vs. Fighters: Who's Your Target Audience, Women or Men?

Lovers seduce women; fighters intimidate men. But why do men choose the specializations they do – and which should you choose? I was probably about 20 years old when I accepted what was to me a weird fact at the time. That fact was that the toughest, manliest, most utterly male, intimidating men...

www.girlschase.com

Chase

 

[Bill]

It’s more signifiers of status. Constantly puffing your chest out and being defensive doesn’t signify status, the highest status person is the most relaxed and unthreatened. Women also want connection, women can cheat on a very high status guy with a seemingly low status guy simply because she feels her emotional needs are unfulfilled.

 

[Will_V]

Another thing: just imagine for a second you're the hot girl and you're hanging around with some gorilla. The effect he has on other people might be entertaining, but you already know you're a prize and you probably have far more actual influence in social situations than he does, since people want something from you but merely want to get out of his way. So much for his actual power.

Also, what is there once you look past his physicality? I see all the time dudes who other dudes react to with 'respect' who I can clearly see are operating from a framework of insecurity or lack of awareness. For someone who is smooth and avoids confrontation these guys are easy prey. And what's more women can see all this unfolding clearly, and guess who it makes them attracted to?

And for her, who spends half an hour in bed with him and then the rest of the time dealing with his personality, what is going to be more important, the sex (if he even knows how to satisfy her) or who he really is inside? A great emotional connection, scintillating conversation, leadership that she is happy with, and orgasmic sex are not functions of superficial 'alpha' traits. That's why if he lacks those things but has stuff going on she might keep him around for those perks but sooner or later she's going to have a hole that he can't fill.

The dudes who have not only the frame control but also the physicality rarely lean on the latter. In fact they tend to be friendlier and more easygoing than the typical dude, which makes them very likeable and makes their authority much more palatable, and will only be threatening in brief and subtle but very effective ways. And you can see the way their women enjoy their ability to dominate others while putting them at ease.

 

[Arnav]

Another thing: just imagine for a second you're the hot girl and you're hanging around with some gorilla. The effect he has on other people might be entertaining, but you already know you're a prize and you probably have far more actual influence in social situations than he does, since people want something from you but merely want to get out of his way. So much for his actual power.

Also, what is there once you look past his physicality? I see all the time dudes who other dudes react to with 'respect' who I can clearly see are operating from a framework of insecurity or lack of awareness. For someone who is smooth and avoids confrontation these guys are easy prey. And what's more women can see all this unfolding clearly, and guess who it makes them attracted to?

And for her, who spends half an hour in bed with him and then the rest of the time dealing with his personality, what is going to be more important, the sex (if he even knows how to satisfy her) or who he really is inside? A great emotional connection, scintillating conversation, leadership that she is happy with, and orgasmic sex are not functions of superficial 'alpha' traits. That's why if he lacks those things but has stuff going on she might keep him around for those perks but sooner or later she's going to have a hole that he can't fill.

The dudes who have not only the frame control but also the physicality rarely lean on the latter. In fact they tend to be friendlier and more easygoing than the typical dude, which makes them very likeable and makes their authority much more palatable, and will only be threatening in brief and subtle but very effective ways. And you can see the way their women enjoy their ability to dominate others while putting them at ease.

@Arnav,



The gym is filled with physically strong men who act tough and alpha but go that route because they are weak-willed and insecure. Not ALL guys in the gym are like this -- but a good portion of them are.

The same is true for "alpha male tough guys" who go around raging over the slightest things, getting into fights, beating people up. Guys who beat people up are guys with something to prove. You don't do that if you know who you are and what you're about. It's pointless.

Guys are ironically the ones who are more impressed with big, strong tough guys than women are. If you look at the studies on how men versus women evaluate men's bodies, women prefer lean, in-shape bodies on men, while guys are most impressed by these gigantic musclemen. The reason why is because women are looking for signs of health, and the most natural-looking physically fit body is the healthiest, whereas men are looking for males who are potential threats, and the biggest guy there is signaling both that he is the strongest and also probably that he prides himself on his strength and toughness above all (and probably is happy to prove how big and strong he is by throttling slighter men).

I can't speak for others (or... maybe I can? I'm pretty sure everyone in the seduction community is going to have more or less the same perspective I do on this), but when I talk about 'strong men' it has nothing to do with physical strength. A cripple can be a 'strong man'. I'm talking about dudes with strong inner strength, who have rock-solid frames, who know what they're about, are able to be chill yet commanding, and are what you might call 'natural leaders'. A guy like this is STRONG. Much bigger men will either hate him or love him, depending on how good he is at magnetizing men as well as women (some guys are better at magnetizing men, some are better at magnetizing women, and some are good at magnetizing both).

This is the kind of strong you want to be if success with women is the goal. Also just social success in general. That big angry biker dude with the cheating girlfriend probably isn't winning a lot of popularity contests, I'd imagine.

See also:

Lovers vs. Fighters: Who's Your Target Audience, Women or Men?

Lovers seduce women; fighters intimidate men. But why do men choose the specializations they do – and which should you choose? I was probably about 20 years old when I accepted what was to me a weird fact at the time. That fact was that the toughest, manliest, most utterly male, intimidating men...

www.girlschase.com

Chase

@Arnav,



The gym is filled with physically strong men who act tough and alpha but go that route because they are weak-willed and insecure. Not ALL guys in the gym are like this -- but a good portion of them are.

The same is true for "alpha male tough guys" who go around raging over the slightest things, getting into fights, beating people up. Guys who beat people up are guys with something to prove. You don't do that if you know who you are and what you're about. It's pointless.

Guys are ironically the ones who are more impressed with big, strong tough guys than women are. If you look at the studies on how men versus women evaluate men's bodies, women prefer lean, in-shape bodies on men, while guys are most impressed by these gigantic musclemen. The reason why is because women are looking for signs of health, and the most natural-looking physically fit body is the healthiest, whereas men are looking for males who are potential threats, and the biggest guy there is signaling both that he is the strongest and also probably that he prides himself on his strength and toughness above all (and probably is happy to prove how big and strong he is by throttling slighter men).

I can't speak for others (or... maybe I can? I'm pretty sure everyone in the seduction community is going to have more or less the same perspective I do on this), but when I talk about 'strong men' it has nothing to do with physical strength. A cripple can be a 'strong man'. I'm talking about dudes with strong inner strength, who have rock-solid frames, who know what they're about, are able to be chill yet commanding, and are what you might call 'natural leaders'. A guy like this is STRONG. Much bigger men will either hate him or love him, depending on how good he is at magnetizing men as well as women (some guys are better at magnetizing men, some are better at magnetizing women, and some are good at magnetizing both).

This is the kind of strong you want to be if success with women is the goal. Also just social success in general. That big angry biker dude with the cheating girlfriend probably isn't winning a lot of popularity contests, I'd imagine.

See also:

Lovers vs. Fighters: Who's Your Target Audience, Women or Men?

Lovers seduce women; fighters intimidate men. But why do men choose the specializations they do – and which should you choose? I was probably about 20 years old when I accepted what was to me a weird fact at the time. That fact was that the toughest, manliest, most utterly male, intimidating men...

www.girlschase.com

Chase

Ahh I see it now, i guess seeing other guys intimated and being submissive around him messed up with my head as his dominance was on full display.

The girl actually had a quite a different skillset she was a master at flirtation, gave these incredibly sexy expressions that really made you go wild for her, would make sexually sugestive and ambigious remarks that really made go wild for her abd orbit around her

@Arnav,



The gym is filled with physically strong men who act tough and alpha but go that route because they are weak-willed and insecure. Not ALL guys in the gym are like this -- but a good portion of them are.

The same is true for "alpha male tough guys" who go around raging over the slightest things, getting into fights, beating people up. Guys who beat people up are guys with something to prove. You don't do that if you know who you are and what you're about. It's pointless.

Guys are ironically the ones who are more impressed with big, strong tough guys than women are. If you look at the studies on how men versus women evaluate men's bodies, women prefer lean, in-shape bodies on men, while guys are most impressed by these gigantic musclemen. The reason why is because women are looking for signs of health, and the most natural-looking physically fit body is the healthiest, whereas men are looking for males who are potential threats, and the biggest guy there is signaling both that he is the strongest and also probably that he prides himself on his strength and toughness above all (and probably is happy to prove how big and strong he is by throttling slighter men).

I can't speak for others (or... maybe I can? I'm pretty sure everyone in the seduction community is going to have more or less the same perspective I do on this), but when I talk about 'strong men' it has nothing to do with physical strength. A cripple can be a 'strong man'. I'm talking about dudes with strong inner strength, who have rock-solid frames, who know what they're about, are able to be chill yet commanding, and are what you might call 'natural leaders'. A guy like this is STRONG. Much bigger men will either hate him or love him, depending on how good he is at magnetizing men as well as women (some guys

@Arnav,



The gym is filled with physically strong men who act tough and alpha but go that route because they are weak-willed and insecure. Not ALL guys in the gym are like this -- but a good portion of them are.

The same is true for "alpha male tough guys" who go around raging over the slightest things, getting into fights, beating people up. Guys who beat people up are guys with something to prove. You don't do that if you know who you are and what you're about. It's pointless.

Guys are ironically the ones who are more impressed with big, strong tough guys than women are. If you look at the studies on how men versus women evaluate men's bodies, women prefer lean, in-shape bodies on men, while guys are most impressed by these gigantic musclemen. The reason why is because women are looking for signs of health, and the most natural-looking physically fit body is the healthiest, whereas men are looking for males who are potential threats, and the biggest guy there is signaling both that he is the strongest and also probably that he prides himself on his strength and toughness above all (and probably is happy to prove how big and strong he is by throttling slighter men).

I can't speak for others (or... maybe I can? I'm pretty sure everyone in the seduction community is going to have more or less the same perspective I do on this), but when I talk about 'strong men' it has nothing to do with physical strength. A cripple can be a 'strong man'. I'm talking about dudes with strong inner strength, who have rock-solid frames, who know what they're about, are able to be chill yet commanding, and are what you might call 'natural leaders'. A guy like this is STRONG. Much bigger men will either hate him or love him, depending on how good he is at magnetizing men as well as women (some guys are better at magnetizing men, some are better at magnetizing women, and some are good at magnetizing both).

This is the kind of strong you want to be if success with women is the goal. Also just social success in general. That big angry biker dude with the cheating girlfriend probably isn't winning a lot of popularity contests, I'd imagine.

See also:

Lovers vs. Fighters: Who's Your Target Audience, Women or Men?

Lovers seduce women; fighters intimidate men. But why do men choose the specializations they do – and which should you choose? I was probably about 20 years old when I accepted what was to me a weird fact at the time. That fact was that the toughest, manliest, most utterly male, intimidating men...

www.girlschase.com

Chase

I guess the first order of things to aim to become a strong man seems to be the internal confidence handling your insecurities, eliminating neediness and developing certainity about you.

I guess the loudmouth, alpha dominace sometimes just intimidates me as I assumed If a girl sees me around such a guy, she would quickly loose attraction for me and go for them.

 

[Spyce D]

guess the loudmouth, alpha dominace sometimes just intimidates me as I assumed If a girl sees me around such a guy, she would quickly loose attraction for me and go for them.

Completely relatable .

Am also working on this aspect .

 

[SteelbookCollector]

yup, i know i do get angry and pissed off about it, but its something that will never change, its just like being angry that we have earthquakes and hurricanes, and that is, nobody cares about a womans confidence, thats not how men are attracted to women, us men have to prove our worth all of the time.