What to do when gays come after you?

[ron]

Hello guys. I'm a young man, never had a girlfriend, I haven't been out in the world much, and mostly lived a nerd lifestyle my whole life and only now I am starting to get out more often. I had 1 gay guy, and 1 more on a different occasion, try to hit on me and needless to say I didn't like it & I don't want it to happen anymore. I have questions for you guys, since I am not experienced at all with this. I am trying to figure out why this has happened to me.

1. Is wearing a tye dye shirt with a tye dye hat a way of communicating that you are gay?
2. What is the gay style of dress so I can avoid dressing like that?
3. What should your reaction be if a gay tries to flirt with you? Should you tell him to "fuck off" or something mean like that?
4. Does being short and skinny make you a target for gays?
5. If you're the type who smiles a lot, will you become a target for gays?
6. What type of guys do gays try to prey on?

 

[topcat]

Hello guys. I'm a young man, never had a girlfriend, I haven't been out in the world much, and mostly lived a nerd lifestyle my whole life and only now I am starting to get out more often. I had 1 gay guy, and 1 more on a different occasion, try to hit on me and needless to say I didn't like it & I don't want it to happen anymore. I have questions for you guys, since I am not experienced at all with this. I am trying to figure out why this has happened to me.

1. Is wearing a tye dye shirt with a tye dye hat a way of communicating that you are gay?
2. What is the gay style of dress so I can avoid dressing like that?
3. What should your reaction be if a gay tries to flirt with you? Should you tell him to "fuck off" or something mean like that?
4. Does being short and skinny make you a target for gays?
5. If you're the type who smiles a lot, will you become a target for gays?
6. What type of guys do gays try to prey on?

lol dude leave the gays alone. It’s a compliment. As long as they’re not touching you unsolicited it’ll be alright..

Better get used to it though. By making yourself attractive to women you’re inevitably gunna attract the gays too. Just smile, take the compliment and tell em “not tonight ”.

You can learn a lot about presenting yourself as a sexy man by observing gays..

 

[Vision]

Hello guys. I'm a young man, never had a girlfriend, I haven't been out in the world much, and mostly lived a nerd lifestyle my whole life and only now I am starting to get out more often. I had 1 gay guy, and 1 more on a different occasion, try to hit on me and needless to say I didn't like it & I don't want it to happen anymore. I have questions for you guys, since I am not experienced at all with this. I am trying to figure out why this has happened to me.

1. Is wearing a tye dye shirt with a tye dye hat a way of communicating that you are gay?
2. What is the gay style of dress so I can avoid dressing like that?
3. What should your reaction be if a gay tries to flirt with you? Should you tell him to "fuck off" or something mean like that?
4. Does being short and skinny make you a target for gays?
5. If you're the type who smiles a lot, will you become a target for gays?
6. What type of guys do gays try to prey on?

I get gay guys who hit on me all the time... in fact, I usually tell women stories about it.

It's an attraction trigger. We call this, "preselected by gay men."

You're not going to stop it completely, especially if you have a face that they like... doesn't matter how you dress. Gay guys are looking to fuck straight guys because they're convinced straight guys are just pretending they're straight.

My roommate in college was gay and he said that he's fucked a lot of guys who claimed they were straight... even after he hooked up with them.

So don't worry about it, you're not going to stop it by wearing a certain type of clothes... my guess is if you walked around with a "All faggots will burn in hell" shirt on, some gay guy will take that as a challenge and approach you just to see if he can fuck you.

Instead, you need to have strong boundaries, let them know that you're not interested.

If you want to, you can recruit them to help you pick up girls because they have special privilege where they can say and do things that nobody else can because they're gay.

Also, women tend to get turned on around gay men and do things that they normally wouldn't do.

If you don't want the gay guy around you, just stop him in his tracks, be very firm that you don't want to talk to him and walk away if you need to without getting emotionally caught up in whatever bullshit he says. They can be very persistent so you may need to temporarily leave a venue if it gets too bad.

 

[Chase]

I've had women and gay guys alike tell me I am "obviously not gay" because I have "too much testosterone."

I am also not short, nor skinny, nor do I smile a lot or wear tye dye shirts.

I still get gay guys hitting on me anyway. Over the years I have had my butt slapped and pinched by gay guys, had a gay guy rub my bicep, and one tranny in a Bangkok gogo grabbed my dick (while my pants were on, fortunately). I've had gay guys offer to buy me drinks, another tranny (this time in the US) offer me a BJ, his tranny buddy stick a hand inside my shirt to rub my chest, and another time another tranny (this one in Japan) try to go home with me.

When I was newer I used to use it as a DHV with girls... I'd just start talking about gays and trannies slapping my butt and coming onto me. The girls would all say the same thing: "Gay guys have good taste" (which is the girl complimenting indirectly, by complimenting the gay guy's taste in you).

You're going to tend to take a lot of things personal when you're new: "Ew, why do these gay guys like me? Can't they tell I'm not gay!" "Oh man, why did she reject me? Does she really think I'm not good enough?" Etc.

As you go you will realize this stuff is a lot less personal than it feels like.

Gay guys who come onto you don't know if you're gay or straight or what.

Girls who reject you don't actually know if you're compatible for them or not (they're just busy or not in the right head space or your approach was a little bit off). The same girl who rejected you last night might be happy to meet you if she met you today under different circumstances.

So, don't take it personal.

If gay guys are into you, then you're doing something right with your presentation.

I just tell them, "Sorry bro, not my thing," and never had a problem after that.

Use it as encouragement that you're looking good and go meet girls instead.

Chase

 

[Skills]

I got laid couple of times due to gay dudes, gay dudes part of the secret society when I came from Latin America I was super homophobic and tins of maddona whore changes in both will improve your results in the field both directly and indirectly check out my article on how to deal with them http://www.theskillsmethod.com/deal-transsexuals-gays-lesbians-club/

 

[Starboy]

"Oh man, why did she reject me? Does she really think I'm not good enough?" Etc.

Girls who reject you don't actually know if you're compatible for them or not (they're just busy or not in the right head space or your approach was a little bit off). The same girl who rejected you last night might be happy to meet you if she met you today under different circumstances.

Do you ever approach girls who turned you down in daygame or nightgame that you recognize you've already approached before or did they remember you? Did you ever turn it around with them and either get their #,go on a date, or sleep with them? I have this weird fear of reapproaching the same woman twice weeks or even months apart. I don't wanna get called out by a woman for being thirsty. That would feel embarassing.

If I fail on the first approach/interaction with a woman I think in my mind that means I will never have a chance of sleeping with her for the rest of time lol. So because of that I put more pressure on myself to have great game if I do approach a hot woman.

I try to consciously remember faces/appearances of women I speak to even if they were short interactions/blowouts because I don't wanna be known or percieved as that thirsty guy who walks around telling women they're cute/whatever.

I wouldn't want women to go to their friends and say "hey watch out for this starboy guy" or "this guy named starboy went up to me and told me my dress was cute wtf". Ik that's why some guys from here use aliases. I'm pretty lowkey and subtle for the most part when I daygame and recognize if i'm socially calibrated or not,but its still something that can cross my mind. I know a guy recently who got two girls # and they were best friends and one of the girls sent him a wall of text lecturing him against using and manipulating girls to learn pickup lol.

I worry about all these scenarios even though I live in one of the biggest cities in the world
(-__-)
Weak ego ik working on it

 

[Chase]

@Starboy,

Personally, I have never had that happen to me in many thousands of approaches. Including when I lived in a small college town.

I know it happens to guys occasionally. There's a guy I know who day games, and has day gamed consistently for many years in the same one large-ish city. A few times a year he approaches either a.) a girl who tells him he approached her a year ago, or b.) some chick it turns out he knows (like the girlfriend or wife of a friend).

Almost every time it's happened he's said the girl was just like, "Oh haha! You approached me last year!" and he's like "Oh really? Well what happened then, help me remember!" and she is like "You were very charming but I was in a relationship." And then he will ask her well how about now, still in that relationship now or can I take you out now?

I believe once he said a girl he re-approached told him he said exactly the same thing to open her 18 months ago that he did that time. So I guess his openers don't change much

Only once do I recall him saying a woman was annoyed to get approached by him again.

I have certainly intentionally re-approached women I talked to earlier, either the same day/night, or a little later on (especially when I lived in a smaller town and you'd see the same people, or when I have a regular haunt I like to go to and you start noticing other regular patrons). I have an article on it:

Shotgun Opening and Reopening Women Later in the Night

Today I want to talk about two different but related kinds of opening: Shotgun opening, and Reopening You'll mostly use these with women in social nighttime venues (bars and clubs, parties, networking events), but they're practical by day as well, in the right places (charity events or rallies...

www.girlschase.com

As does @Teevster:

Hit and Run Pickup in Clubs: If at First She Does Not Respond…

Previously I laid out my new strategy of approaching – the “hit-and-run” strategy – which allows you to approach women without facing any strong form of resistance (such as “approach walls” – where women respond negatively to your approach). To recap, my hit-and-run strategy is based on first...

www.girlschase.com

If you're worried about being perceived as a guy who walks around telling women they're cute, then... why not switch openers?

If you're going direct, build up the skill of making genuine compliments. It makes a huge difference:

How to Compliment a Girl Like You've Known Her for Years

In the article on causes and cures for a moody girlfriend, a reader asks about how to compliment a girl, saying: “Hi there Chase, Can you write an article about compliments to girls that [you] are interested in. Not just from that you approached cold but girls that you met through hobbies or...

www.girlschase.com

If you genuinely like a girl's fashion, and compliment her on that... and then half a year later you genuinely like a girl's hair, and compliment her on that... and it turns out it was the same girl... then you just get to say, "Well see! You have great hair AND great clothes!"

Or you can go indirect, and then it's just starting conversations with women casually. If you start a casual conversation with a woman one day, and then three months later you start another casual conversation with her, the worst thing she can accuse you of being is friendly and sociable.

I know a guy recently who got two girls # and they were best friends and one of the girls sent him a wall of text lecturing him against using and manipulating girls to learn pickup lol.

Well, that's kind of a 1-in-10,000 chance there.

I've heard maybe one other story about something like that happening.

Really, it sounds like you need to work on frame control more than anything else.

I've never worried about "What if some girl I approach remembers I approached her before?" because I'm confident I could spin it into a positive:

You: I saw you over here and blah blah​

​

Her: Hey... You said the same thing to me five months ago!​

​

You: Did I? Then it must be because it's true. Destiny seems to have brought us together again!​

Improve your frame control and 99% of these things guys worry about you will quit worrying about because at worst you'll defuse it... at best you'll turn it to your advantage.

I'd love to meet some girl who claimed I'd approached her before. Would she be intrigued? Would she make assumptions about me I could then deftly parry? How would that go?

Further, I would love for some girl to get pissed and send me a long text message about how I was manipulating women. The first thing I'd do is call her and try to get her talking to me so she could hear my voice and discover I am a fantastic guy and that thing earlier was all just a mixup. Then playfully invite her and her friend both out on a date with me together (then settle for just her when she balks).

Get your frame control down.

These worries will quit bugging you then.

Chase

 

[ron]

You can learn a lot about presenting yourself as a sexy man by observing gays..

Huh? How can you learn that from a gay man?

 

[ron]

help you pick up girls because they have special privilege where they can say and do things that nobody else can because they're gay.

Also, women tend to get turned on around gay men and do things that they normally wouldn't do.

Thanks. But can you explain this to me? What do you mean when you say they have special priviledges around women? Can you give examples? And, why do women get turned on around gays and do things they normally wouldn't do?

 

[topcat]

Huh? How can you learn that from a gay man?

The one's who do it right ooze sexual confidence, often their entire personas are built on projecting sexuality.

Observe the way they dress, carry themselves (I'm not necessarily talking about the extremely effete camp ones, but in some ways yes even them too).

Take their elegance, their grooming, their vibe, tone down the overtly feminine things and meld them with your own masculinity. Maybe move more elegantly, add a degree of flamboyance to the way you dress, be more evocative in your carriage and vocal expression. Touch women more. Project your sexuality without apology.

Gay men are provocative.

I don't know how many times I've seen women show attraction for a beautiful man, only to verbalize dismay at the idea that he is probably gay...
I reckon it helps to be a man who presents just like this, only to relieve women when they learn that you in fact do love pussy.

Best.

 

[Vision]

Thanks. But can you explain this to me? What do you mean when you say they have special priviledges around women?

Yeah, gay guys are no threat to women so they can get away with a lot more.

They can say crazy shit that you can't say and get away with it.

They can (and often do) turn conversations very sexual, very quickly without freaking anyone out.

They can touch, kiss, slap asses, and do all kinds of other shit that you may not be able to do because women aren't worried about them trying to fuck them.

Women will tell gay guys shit they will never tell you.

If you're up for it, my suggestion is that you make some gay friends who like to go out and are willing to respect your boundaries.

Just go watch them interact with women, it's great.

There used to be this guy in the community, back in the day, named Mehow.

And Mehow had some of the gayest game in the community... but it allowed him to get women really comfortable really quickly because they all thought he was a flaming homo.

Can you give examples? And, why do women get turned on around gays and do things they normally wouldn't do?

They get turned on because women LOVE the dick. They want dick in them, around them, slapping them in the face, sticking them all over the place... women love dick.

Gay guys have dicks and they look like men (usually). And gays often are better at dressing themselves, grooming themselves, and communicating than most regular guys are.

Just like you're probably attracted to females, vaginas, female scents, and all kinds of things female... women are attracted to all things male.

And so when women get around a bunch of gay guys who are out having fun, talking about fucking, taking things sexual, and they're men who have dicks, it turns women on, regardless of whether they're gay or not.

Probably similar in a way to lesbian softcore porn turning on a straight guy.

And since they're all turned on, having fun, and around guys who are absolutely no threat to them, they're also usually more open to doing things that they wouldn't normally do if they weren't in that state... and followed by gay guys prodding them to do stuff, because they're gay and that's what a lot of gay guys do, they often do shit that is outside of their comfort zone...

- Like making out with random people or a guy they are attracted to.
- Like going home with a guy they wouldn't normally go home with.
- Like talking about their sexual desires that they normally wouldn't talk about.
- Like revealing body parts that they normally wouldn't reveal in public.
- I'm sure there are a lot of things here that I'm missing.

 

[Slade Scarface]

Do you ever approach girls who turned you down in daygame or nightgame that you recognize you've already approached before or did they remember you? Did you ever turn it around with them and either get their #,go on a date, or sleep with them? I have this weird fear of reapproaching the same woman twice weeks or even months apart. I don't wanna get called out by a woman for being thirsty. That would feel embarassing.

If I fail on the first approach/interaction with a woman I think in my mind that means I will never have a chance of sleeping with her for the rest of time lol. So because of that I put more pressure on myself to have great game if I do approach a hot woman.

I try to consciously remember faces/appearances of women I speak to even if they were short interactions/blowouts because I don't wanna be known or percieved as that thirsty guy who walks around telling women they're cute/whatever.

I wouldn't want women to go to their friends and say "hey watch out for this starboy guy" or "this guy named starboy went up to me and told me my dress was cute wtf". Ik that's why some guys from here use aliases. I'm pretty lowkey and subtle for the most part when I daygame and recognize if i'm socially calibrated or not,but its still something that can cross my mind. I know a guy recently who got two girls # and they were best friends and one of the girls sent him a wall of text lecturing him against using and manipulating girls to learn pickup lol.

I worry about all these scenarios even though I live in one of the biggest cities in the world
(-__-)
Weak ego ik working on it

Well, several times I have approached girls whom I had approached before, I didnt remember them but they did, and they said I told them the same things I am saying now. I also remember day gaming and I ended up picking two numbers from gals who happened to be sisters at different times. One of them told me later about it and I ignored...all she kept asking was "what is your deal? You approached me and my sister using the same lines". Another instance again is of me approaching a gal and her friend on different days...the first one I approached called me out on it and gave a rant, but she later agreed to go out with me when i saw her in person some days later...it is not a big deal actually. A day gamer even in a big city with millions of people will run into these scenarios. Just the same way I have worked for people who happen to know each other and they would rate me totally differently.

 

[DarkKnight]

Hahah I really have to laugh when I read the title of this post, it is so funny to visualize

You could be polite and reject them, no reason to be hurtful, but no reason to give them any openings either, it is really as simple as that.

I have no idea by the way if when a gay dude finds you attractive it is the same attraction as the ladies feel. There might be some difference there. Otherwise you might feel complimented.

 

[ablearcher]

Definitely take it as a compliment! It means you are an attractive man, and I would certainly feel a confidence boost if that happened to me.

 

[ron]

The one's who do it right ooze sexual confidence, often their entire personas are built on projecting sexuality.

Observe the way they dress, carry themselves (I'm not necessarily talking about the extremely effete camp ones, but in some ways yes even them too).

Take their elegance, their grooming, their vibe, tone down the overtly feminine things and meld them with your own masculinity. Maybe move more elegantly, add a degree of flamboyance to the way you dress, be more evocative in your carriage and vocal expression. Touch women more. Project your sexuality without apology.

Gay men are provocative.

I don't know how many times I've seen women show attraction for a beautiful man, only to verbalize dismay at the idea that he is probably gay...
I reckon it helps to be a man who presents just like this, only to relieve women when they learn that you in fact do love pussy.

Best.

I see. Now that I think of it, I am somewhat similar to what you described. I do dress flamboyantly, I'm handsome, well-groomed. (Which is probably why they like me on sight - both gays and women). But I can work on myself some more. I think I know the type of attitude you're speaking about. I am just usually not in a sexual-esque mood, so I don't speak that way with people I meet. I don't "project my sexuality" as you said. I'm always in a "business" state of mind. I tend to be very dry, pendantic, cold, aloof. I'm not a very fun-loving person. Though my style of dress might lead a person to think otherwise. So in that regard I'm a bit incongruent.

But the correct attitude is like that of a metrosexual artist, if I understand you correctly. He's the type that starts conversations with women based on artistic observations he's been making. Might ask for her opinion on something abstract or emotional or artistic. He always expresses himself artfully, like a stereotypical frenchman. But also makes his intent clear, and his intent sure as hell is not gay. Let me know if I have the right idea.

 

[Tony D]

Just suck their cock and get it over with.

 

[ron]

Just suck their cock and get it over with.

Last time I checked, women don't have one. Are you gay? Is that why it comes to your mind?

 

[Vision]

Last time I checked, women don't have one. Are you gay? Is that why it comes to your mind?

It's not gay if you say "no homo" before or after you do it. I mean, that's what I've heard, anyway...

 

[Starboy]

It's not gay if you say "no homo" before or after you do it. I mean, that's what I've heard, anyway...

Nah its not gay if you're recieving head. Only when giving it. That's the rule

 

[Vision]

Nah its not gay if you're recieving head. Only when giving it. That's the rule

Is that how it works with anal too... if I'm the one receiving it, it's not gay?

Well, that clears up a lot from my past! No gay here!