Why are you here?

[Cam87]

Re: STICKIED: Why are you here?

I'm here because after I ended a 6+ year relationship, I realized I've never really dated at 26 years old and knew I had some work to do (So for all you guys in your early 20's or late teens you guys are doing just dandy!). So I did some Google searches and came across the site.

To me, single life is a new adventure and an amazingly fun challenge. Having the right mindset really helps: knowing that being good with women is a skill that has to be learned and practiced. Meaning there is a lot of failure along the way. I'm just glad I found this site because it's really helping me realize opportunities and cut the learning curve down.

 

[newgameplus]

Re: STICKIED: Why are you here?

i'm here because chase's blog posts are incredibly educating. discussing and reading everybody's personal experiences help me and others learn more about how to handle situations.

my pick up ability is pretty solid at this point, it really is all about body language and how comfortable you are to everything. so i know i can pull in numbers pretty much everyday ( i have been, at the very very least, one a day.)

all i really have to do is nonverbal open, open with small talk about our surroundings, directly open and say "i'm actually just talking to you because i think you're cute, lets get lunch some time. what's your number?" and it seems like it works every time unless they're already taken.

but because of my oldschool confession i wrote about, i've stunted my ability to act properly on dates. i've been on three dates since then a disaster with a girl i chased for three months, and i know i'll get better.

if anything, i don't have to be worried, since i can get numbers fine. absolute abundance is definitely something helping me. it also helps me move things forward faster with women. this website has helped me grow and develop very well, and i only started to read about 2 weeks or so ago.

 

[charming]

I'm here because of the blog. I started reading it a few months ago, and I was immediately hooked. Chase's advice fit perfectly with my learning style, and I have been able to make great improvements in my my social life in only a short period of time. I wanted to join the forum because I figured that I could learn from like-minded folks who were further along the same path as me, as well as give advice to those who are struggling in the same ways that I have.

Well put! #ditto

 

[Andres]

Re: STICKIED: Why are you here?

I see myself as intermediate before I found this site. Strange thing was after my last serious relationship I had somehow lost my mojo completely. I am 25 now and I am not sure why I kept hitting failure after failure when I was able to get girls before. I was in depression when I found this website. Something like a quarter-life crisis. The next girl that came around I actually managed to have as a g/f (even though it only sadly lasted a month). But that was a testimony that the advice on this website does work. I constantly seek self improvement in many areas of my life and I am glad Chase provides all sorts of insights almost daily to help us jaded guys combat our judgement and needy emotions. So that's what brought me here.

 

[Astigmatic20]

Re: STICKIED: Why are you here?

I came to this site because I wanted to know the system and hopefully master the system behind relationships and dating.

I'm a "NGSB" (No Girlfriend since Birth) guy so I'm fairly new in the dating scene. I'm only 19 but I got teased a lot for not having a girlfriend and I'm probably one of the few members in my family who isn't in a relationship. Despite this, I'm not annoyed by this and I'm not rushing to be in any kind of romantic relationship but I might as get some experience in dating before my 20s. I'm frankly good-looking though I am a little bit on the short side (5'4" but this is the average height for men in my country), smart (I skipped 3 years of school), and very sociable so I have a lot of friends of both genders.

It was frustrating for me to see other men who, though I hate judging others, don't look that handsome or act like a man who deserves to be in a relationship so I wonder to myself what qualities I have that don't get the girls. I asked a lot of people how I should date people but for the most part, I'm not totally convinced of their ideas. I firmly believe there is a system behind all of it so I take their "do what your heart tells you" old-fashioned advice with a grain of salt.

I read books like "The Game" to understand how the system works and what I can do to utilize it. I came across this site after browsing through the internet for practical and effective ideas on dating and I can honestly say it's one of the best I've encountered. I hope that being part of this forum will enlighten me in a lot of ways and help me make new friends who can share their ideas & experiences as well.

 

[ocantu1987]

Re: STICKIED: Why are you here?

Never had a girlfriend ever, paid for sex, girls in high school thought I was just too skinny (120lbs) to give me the green light. There are times when I feel very lonely like when I look at my cell phone and there are no girls numbers and the only woman that calls me is my mom haha that sucks.

Things I am doing to change:

1. reading girls chase (I got the Ebook) as well as other material from other PUA such as Roosh. I bought his book "Bang" on amazon.

2. Doing stronglifts 5x5 eating 3000 calories a day. I packed on a few pounds of muscle already now I am 160lbs and counting.

3. Going out more.

 

[Thedoctor]

Re: STICKIED: Why are you here?

Hey everyone,

Ironically, I'm not really here for advice on women. I'm here to change my mental model, which was a term I wasn't even familiar with until I read the post on it from this site. The entire Girls Chase team has a better grasp on psychology and behaviour than many of the so called "experts" in these fields. Until recently, I was really headed into a downward spiral fueled by my faulty mental model that left me HATING the world (I'll probably do a more in depth post about this in the future). I was constantly angry. This site has helped me change that perspective, and the for the first time in a very long time, I'm a lot more relaxed and happy. Other people in my life have even commented on this. My hope is that the change remains permanent, fingers crossed!

Thanks to the entire Girls Chase team. Keep up the fantastic work!

-Doc

 

[FixYourselves]

Re: STICKIED: Why are you here?

I'm here to improve my ability to be successful with women, and with my life in general. It is very useful to hear and read advice from others with the same goal.

 

[gifatron]

Re: STICKIED: Why are you here?

Text is a great outlet for thoughts, and organizing something such that other people can read it encourages me to write it well. Furthermore, if someone can pinpoint weaknesses of mine and give me pointers...that's a huge plus, too.

Not to mention, GirlsChase is a very interesting place in that there's a big emphasis on giving girls what they want in order to get what you want -- it's more about value exchange and building real relationships (however fleeting) than a lot of what I find to be rather mechanical and thoughtless PUA stuff...GC just seems warmer, more genuine, more natural, and more giving to me, so it's just a better community for me.

 

[Richard]

Re: STICKIED: Why are you here?

A number of answers that have already been said apply to me.
I originally found this site to actively meet women after I broke up with my first ex, she wanted a fuck buddy while she was with me, and had I known what I know now, I could have handled the situation and kept her, she was the first girl I fell in love with, and after her, I spiraled into depression, but used that negative energy to propel myself forward, thus, I found this site, and started to meet women. I joined this site originally to upgrade myself, to get better with women and people in general, but currently, my reason for being here has multiplied.
Like Ross, I enjoy intelligent conversation and I love to learn new things, knowledge is something I frequently collect, and is something that I love to pass on. I'm on this site to learn from those who know more than me, as well as teach those who don't know as much as me.
Basically, I'm on this site to stay active in the community, to talk about everything with men alot like myself, to learn as much and teach as much as I can, I've really come to hold this site and its members in high standing, I both appreciate and respect all of you on this site. =)
- Richard

 

[carpedm]

Re: STICKIED: Why are you here?

I'm on this site to learn from those who know more than me, as well as teach those who don't know as much as me.

- Richard

What it ultimately comes down to for me is that I am here to learn and empower myself in the deepest sense. The icing on the cake would be to become a "force multiplier" once I've become proficient in all of this and achieve actual results-- I already discuss different random strategies with my buddies on a regular basis, but it is my hope that through a persistent and studied practice of GC methodology, I will be able to bring something more to the table in those discussions. The way I see it, learning (and, most importantly, practicing) everything I learn on this site is going to improve my lifestyle in leaps and bounds, especially for the fact that I will be able to improve the lives of my friends, too, and create that ever-sought-after positive feedback loop. This is going to be awesome--in fact, it already is.

 

[Michael]

Re: STICKIED: Why are you here?

I came across this site one day this summer when I googled "How to text girls". It was just one of those "alright, let's just google this and see what's out there" things, and I wasn't too serious about it. But I read Chase's article on the subject, and after that I read a bunch more articles on the site, and that built up my desire to get good at picking up girls and taking them to bed. I've been on the site a fair bit since then, and after a while I came across the forum part of the site, and I've been reading lay reports and field reports, and other articles/threads/posts on the forum as well.

By now I've realized that it would be helpful to start posting on the forum, to get some accountability and feedback, and give me something to improve upon and measure my progress against. This is my first post on the girlschase forums, and you can expect more will be up soon, starting with the 10-day Newbie Assignment.

 

[themainattraction]

Re: STICKIED: Why are you here?

Plain and simple, I've been a romantic all my life, save for a couple years after I was torn by a girl. but now I'm back to being that romantic. Months later after I broke up with my ex I still have feelings for her and realized how dumb I was for letting her go.
This is also coupled by the situation I had this last summer where I reeled in a perfect 10, and I was the suavest, most charming dude ever for a couple months, but then when she kissed me I turned into a total little needy pussy, and she goes bye bye and starts seeing someone else. But the good thing about this is that I know deep inside that I can be very charming with women, it just takes some work to bring it out. And I want to bring it back out with every girl I meet. Also I stumbled on this site because of her, so that's one positive

I'm here so I won't let another perfect 10 get away. I'm here to get rid of my one-itis over my ex. I'm here to sculpt myself into the ladies' man I know I am; it's in there, I just need time to chisel him out. And eventually, not just wait for the love of my life to come into my life but rather go out and find her.

I'm here to learn from the more experienced members. We all know we probably come from similar backgrounds in terms of problems with women, depression as a result of them, and the lack of confidence that comes afterwards. Knowing we've been in similar places and yet, even so, some members were able to overcome that after some months is incredibly empowering.

Lastly, I'm here to keep myself accountable. I find it very easy to have a goal and not actively seek it. I've read tons of information on this site and have barely done much with it, save for a few conversations and a bit of banter here and there. But I'm fixed on changing that. I know I will do it

 

[Prehistoric]

Re: STICKIED: Why are you here?

Mostly, because it frustrates me "not to know what I am doing with women".

I'll explain myself better.

When I found myself out there interacting with girls I act unconsciously, without any plan, strategy or thinking. Sometimes I get results, sometimes I don't, but in both cases, because it's all an unconscious process, I just don't get what I did right and what I did wrong. That's also one of the reasons behind my nickname.

Fun is, in all other aspects on my life i am a very diligent, strategic, goal-setting person, so I am determined to approach the PickUp&Dating part of my life in the same way - and I find interacting with men who consciously have a better clue of what their doing is the best way to start.

Like a kid who's always been playing soccer on the beaches of Brazil being hired by a european club and having to train for the first time with a team, a coach and a plan.

 

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

Re: STICKIED: Why are you here?

I started learning game about 6 years ago and have come a long way since then but I still feel that there are holes that I need to fix. At first I was improving myself a lot and it helped me too because I had guys who had more experience and knowledge than me helping me out. I always felt that there was someone I could look to in life to guide me on my journey to bettering myself in this regard but eventually I found that I was becoming the guy people looked to for advice. It was tougher for me to find advice from guys I know in real life because most guys had no idea when it came to women. I felt kind of alone until I started searching through google and came up on this site. Ever since then I have been reading a lot of the articles but I decided it was time I join the forum and take actions to get even better.

 

[PatriotsRule]

Re: STICKIED: Why are you here?

Sup everyone! -- I'll introduce myself first.
(If there is a board or a thread that is better served for introductions, I would appreciate it if someone could please point me in the right direction. Thanks.)

My name is Ben, and I'm 24 years old, from New England. I am a huge Boston sports fan (pumped for the AFC Championship Game this Sunday, go Pats!); I play guitar and love music (especially rock, but I am pretty open-minded about music); I watch a lot of TV and play a lot of video games; I like to go out, meet people, hang with friends, make people laugh, drink, party, etc.; I am a hard worker with two jobs, but never really cared for school; and, probably most relevant to this community, I am quite interested in the analysis of social dynamics and the psychology behind it.

One specific that I would like to share about me, is that I am a huge fan of the TV show 'Survivor' (I have seen all 27 seasons, some of them as many as 5-10 times). While yes, the game involves a lot to do with survival and physical challenges, the true premise of the game is in the social game-- 16-20 people from all different walks of life, forced to live together and build a society, and they must learn to adapt to the people around them, or they will be voted out of the tribe. This provides a fascinating insight into all sorts of social dynamics, as the physical conditions and high stakes in the game break the players down to reveal their very core selves, and thus create a 'survival of the fittest' effect on the tribe. The strategy that goes into the game, and how one adapts himself into the tribe, and into the majority voting alliance, is very much like many of the principles that I have read about on Girls Chase.

I was very pleasantly surprised to find such an in-depth, analytic, and strategic style to the presentation of knowledge on the subjects discussed on this website. I feel that it fits my personality, interests, and learning style perfectly, and I feel like I relate very well to Chase and some others that I have read on this site and forum.

Now, on to why I am here--

I recently met a beautiful, charming girl who, long story short, I ended up chasing to the point where she would not respond to my requests to go out. We kissed one night, but as I came to learn through this site, I failed to escalate things and ended up with a one-way ticket to the friend zone. That sucked, so I wanted to 'win her back', but alas, I also was taught by this site, that it's time to f***in' move on! Lol. Anyway, during the time that I was texting her asking her out (did this like four days in a row before I stopped after zero response from her. Damn it) I stumbled upon this website. I ended up diving into a lot of the available reading and found it very inspiring--I don't have much experience with women, especially experienced women; most women I've been with (not many) were pretty young or conservative, the ones that actually were experienced gave me really bad anxiety, and most of my hookups have been fueled by lots and lots of 'liquid courage', as they say . But I'm a pretty charming guy with a passion for making people laugh, meeting and connecting with people, and making myself a better, stronger person, so I am excited about what is to come, as I learn and practice more and more.

I hope this introduction is not too high above par for the course here, but from what I've read on Girls Chase so far, I feel like this is a great community that I need to be a part of and introduce myself to, because it seems like I will speak with and learn from a lot of smart people, and the reward of developing such social skills will be infinitely rich.

Thanks for reading. Wish me luck out there. See ya around. Go Patriots!

-Ben

 

[lanseri]

Re: STICKIED: Why are you here?

Hey there

I'm here, because girlschase is the best men talking about women-type community I've come across. And I've been through a lot of them. Seems like there's always some weird faking or showing off going on, or some author trying to force their personal agenda on the community. Also, girlschase.com has that atmosphere of being respectful to men and women alike. That's something I value immensely. The articles are easy to read and always leave a positive taste in my mouth.

I'm a 28 year old student of life with a background in business, technology and most recently art and design. I'm hoping to find a profession in the creative movie arts. So you'll perhaps understand I have an interest in people. And women. =) I used to be totally horrible around women. These days I can proudly say I am merely somewhat horrible! I'm not looking to be a seduction guru or anything. An understanding of women and an ability to give my woman satisfaction mentally and physically is my goal.

 

[Lucky]

The truth is for me I was pissed at not being strong enough in my social life and my inability to get a woman I kept of trying to adapt to the opinion of curtain people to no avail and a bit later I asked out a girl and it didn't end well the reason why I'm here. Is to change myself and a small part of the world rising to a level of game where I might be able to teach people like myself how to improve their life using game to prevent some of the crap I and maybe you had to go through before we knew game.

 

[Hue]

Bump. (well, sorta, it's stickied)

This is an old thread, and with a lot of newer members since it's origination I think it might be cool / insightful to see what people have to say. Or how peoples reasons might have changed.

Why did I join?

I was suffering from serious heartbreak for what seems now to be a silly reason. I understand why the cascade of emotions eventually erupted into depression, but the logic behind it was silly. I had a girlfriend in highschool who I got bored of, cheated on her, then broke up with her. It crushed her. She was really into me, and saw a side of me a lot of people didn't. Then I went to my first university and slutted around for a while. When I found out she was coming to my university (she was a year below me) I entertained the idea of rekindling our relationship. I started to think about why I liked her, but she had a boyfriend. Whenever we saw eachother we both gave eachother doe eyes and shit, but then her logical brain would always kick in and things didn't happen. I couldn't have her, which made my desire grow even stronger - I talked with my mother about it and she was convinced I was in love. Whenever I looked at her, I was captured by her beauty. After some rounds of tears following a music festival (took a little something that plummeted my serotonin), the trajectory following the dark hole of depression eventually made me get up and try this dating / PUA thing.

Why am I here currently?

A couple of reasons. For one, this shit is a whole lot of fun in and of itself. Yes, I love pussy, but I'm just talking about the actual art / practice of seduction. Successfully twirling a girl's frames and spinning her pussy onto my cock is really fun for me, and there's always room for refinement when it comes to doing that.

I'm also passionate about understanding the way people work, as well as better understanding how I myself work - and learn more and more about that by sticking around. It occurred to me that those who put in the time and effort to change themselves through the advice on here that clicks with them end up becoming genuine men. Self-actualized. For someone who's struggled with self-image for most of his life, I'm always trying to be the best version of me (even though I still fall back on stupid habits that inhibit this growth). I can honestly say my worldview has changed a bit since participating in the boards.

In addition, I want to help other guys that have been where I've been in my journey (before and after joining GC). If a guy is really struggling and I'm somehow able to point him in a direction that benefits him that gives me a lot of satisfaction. It's part of the reason I want to go on to get a doctorate degree and be licensed to help individuals struggling from a clinical standpoint.

Lastly, I think the community that exists here is dope. Most people are pretty open minded and strive for excellence.


But enough about me, what brings you guys here?

 

[lostnumber]

Why did I join:

I have some more of my background that I'll get into on an upcoming LR I'm working on, but to put the start of my story out there, I have Aspergers and have struggled with social stuff my whole life. Growing up I was at least a standard deviation ahead of my peers intellectually/academically and at least a standard deviation behind socially. I was maybe 1/3rd of the way through 4th grade when the school decided it couldn't deal with me anymore. They wanted to put me in a place for "special kids" which was essentially a rubber room with attendants. My parents said "fuck that" and hired a lawyer. The compromise was to send me up to middle-school 1.5 years early to take classes with 6th graders under the supervision of some support staff. Needless to say, that put me on more equal footing academically, but didn't do much to help me catch up socially.

I spent most of middle school and highschool depressed and alone. I'm lucky in that I have a lot of ingredients for a successful guy; tall, white, smart, sense of humour and comedic timing, great family and socio-economic background. But I was horribly uncalibrated and stumbling around in the dark. I'd make friends and then lose them by commiting some terrible faux pas, or by being too needy. I would have girls interested and not know it, and chase after girls who WEREN'T interested in me, making an idiot of myself in the process. Most of my spare time I spent playing video games online with strangers, as I found those connections a lot easier to make and mantain.

It wasn't until I stumbled upon Girls Chase around the age of 20 that I realized that what had seemed like random incomprehensible behavior to me actually had a pattern and a purpose. Chase gave me the framework I needed to start interpreting and understanding human interactions. He also gave me the techniques and strategies I needed to get a girl, and within a few months I landed my first serious girlfriend. I forgot about the site for the two years, until that relationship finally ended, and I was back in the saddle. Rinse and repeat for several iterations of girlfriend and here I am today. Through a combination of this process as well as general experience and osmosis over time I've been able to advance myself leaps and bounds, and can honestly say that I'm truly happy with where I am for probably the first time in my life.


Why am I here currently:

Honestly, despite reading Chase's stuff on and off for years I'd never been on the forums before a few months ago. I had a particularly tricky question about one of the girls I was seeing and couldn't find an article that addressed it, so I figured I would make an account and ask. While I was here I realized that a lot of guys were asking questions I knew the answers to. In particular I found that while a lot of guys here use Tinder casually, there weren't many people that had mastered it to the extent I had and were able to give practical and effective advice.

I've sort of reached a plateau in my particular game. I'm sure there are a ton of things I could be doing better, but frankly I get all the results I need for the lifestyle I want. I'm not really a party guy, or a big groups of people kind of guy, and I'm more interested in seeing girls on an ongoing basis than random flings. I'm confident at this point that I can get on Tinder and within 2-3 weeks be seeing a girl that meets my standards on the regular, without having to deal with approaching, going to bars, big social groups etc. Also I just went exclusive with a girl the other week, so my days of meeting women are currently on hold.

So I'm not really on the forums to help myself at this point. I'm here primarily to help other people. I find a ton of satisfaction in being able to help. It's sort of like the ultimate proof to myself that I've "made it" when it comes to the social arts.