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FR++  x3 First Date Sex Struggles

RDawg

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Jul 7, 2014
Messages
419
Hey guys, what’s going on? I’ve recently been struggling a lot with “first date sex” and I am writing 3 reports up, each of different girls that I had dates with over the last week and half. All of these girls, I met off tinder and I actually had another date set up last night (A girl I met Friday night at a bar) but I ended up flaking on her because I was experiencing some “date fatigue”. Funny how Chase came out with that newsletter last night and yet that’s exactly what I experienced yesterday. I’m starting to get busy with school and things are getting a little hectic here. Also, it doesn’t help that out of all three girls, I wasn’t able to get a lay. Anyways, I’ll get started with girl one:

So before this date with Sarah, I wanted to work on inviting myself over to a girl’s house. It’s not always the most convenient when I bring girls back to my house because I live with my parents. And everyone time, I bring a girl home my parents ask me a million questions and think the girls is either my girlfriend or some slut lol?

Note: Anywhere that there is a square it means its a :)

Sarah

Tinder (Wednesday)

Me: Looks like we both have great taste ;)
Her: Why would you say that?
Me: you tell me :/
Her: I like dark beer
Me: I guess we have great taste in two things then lol
Her: how's it going? ahah
Me: pretty good! just relaxing a bit haha hbu??
Her: Sorry, I fell asleep, I had a long day at work
Me: oh yaa, where do you work at?
Her: The government
Me: Oh cool, the government? that sounds like a lot of responsibility lol. How long have you been doing that for?
Her: I just moved here! Only a couple days
Me: Oh that's awesome! So you moved to XYZ then?
Her: That is correct
Me: Nice, well welcome to XYZ haha! Where did you move from?
Her: Thank you! I'm from guelph!
Me: ahh cool! That's quite the move then to here haha ;)
Her: Yeah, it is! Pretty different
Me: Haha ya! Well, since your new around here. How about we grab a drink or a bite sometime soon and maybe I can show you around a bit? :)
Her: I'de love to, there's actually this place near my work I keep wanting to go into
Me: Great! Haha really? Do you know what the place is called? :)
Her: XYZ? The XYZ?
Me: The XYZ, ya that's a great place and they got some great drinks there! Here text me *** *** ***** or send me ur # and will set something up :)

Texting

Her: Hey, it's sar
Me: Hey Sarah! So what do you say we grab those drinks and bite at Manchester then? :)
Her: Haha sure what day this week ya thinking?
Me: Alright, well i'm free Friday or Sunday evening, if either of those days work for you? :)
Her: Friday's Good!
Me: Alright, how does 8 sound Friday?
Her: Sounds great :)
kk great! I'll see ya Friday :)
Me: Her: Okay awesome, i'll text you closer to then :)
Me: Okay :)
Her: Looking forward to it!
(Thursday)
Her: Hey are we still on for tomorrow night? 
Me: Yes we are 
Her: Okay great!

(Friday)

So about an hour before the date, I text her to confirm that we are still on for 8. She texts me back and say’s that she is running a bit late and asks if it’s okay if we meet for 8:30, which I agree too and I am fine with.

So, I get ready and leave and go to meet Sarah at the bar/pub. I show up a few minutes late, just to get her thinking about me a little more and to make her a little “ancy”. So, just before I show up, she texts me saying that she is sitting in the back of the bar/pub in a booth. I text her back and tell her I am about a minute away. I walk in and then I proceed to walk to the back of the bar/pub and there she is sitting in a booth.

I walk over and greet her and then sit down across from her in the booth. She is really short, a lot shorter than I thought. Probably about 5 feet tall but she has some pretty big tits for a short person haha. I have to say, she isn’t the greatest looking but she is still quite cute.

As I sit down, we each order a Guinness (Fucking best beer ever). This chick already seems pretty cool because she like Guinness haha. Anyways, as soon as I saw her order a beer, I remembered one of Chase’s article about girl’s who prefer to drink beer over spirits or no alcohol are more likely to be open to “First Date Sex”. There was some research article that Chase posted in his article about this. So, I thought to myself there is probably a good chance I am going to fuck this girl tonight, once I saw that.

So I get into some deep diving with her and some key takeaways from the conversation where that she had just moved here to the city for Co-Op. Co-Op only lasts about a semester and that means she is probably only down for a few months. Also, she was from Guelph, which is about like 5 hours away from where we were and she had just moved to the city about a week ago. I kind of took these points, as a good indication that she is probably looking for some cock. New girl form out of town that doesn’t know anyone = free to do whatever she wants and no one will really ever know. Also, I found out she lived nearby on her own with a landlord.

So, conversation continues on and we order another beer and an appetizer. After her second beer, she tells me she already feels drunk. Lol really? I didn’t believe it but she may have been a little tipsy. We continue to flirt a bit, she tells me she has a big ass, I tell her I have a bigger ass, etc. After about 2 hours, I finally pull her, but I felt I dragged things out a bit. I should of pulled her at about 10PM because things got slightly awkward (A few awkward laughs, stares and pauses lol) for about half an hour.

The Pull 10:30PM

Me: It’s getting kind of busy and loud in here. Do you want to get out of here?
Her: Sure
We end up splitting the bill, put our jackets on and then head outside. We start walking down the street.
Me: Wow, it’s freezing out here.
Her: Omg. I know
Me: Listen, your place is closer than mine. How about we go back to your place and just relax and warm up? I’d invite you back to my house but’s it further out.
Her: Oh, my landlord doesn’t let me have people over. (Lol wow?)
Me: haha really?
Her: Ya, I can’t bring anyone back. (She just didn’t seem comfortable with the idea of bringing me back to her place, oh well no big deal)
Me: Okay, well, let’s go to my place then, it’s cold out here
Her: Okay
So, we walk back to my car and then I drive her back to my place, which is about a ten minute drive. (note: this girl doesn’t drive).

My House

We get to my house at around 11PM and then we walk downstairs to my basement. Thankfully my parents were sleeping, so I didn’t have to deal with them at all. I offer Sarah a girl of water, but she declines. So we sit down on my small couch and I throw a movie on, basically whatever was on, I think it was Spider-Man. We sit and talk for a few minutes and then I just kiss her. We makeout for about 30 seconds and then I think she may have pulled back and said.. “Wow, that’s was unexpected” and she laughs a bit. I don’t say anything and I just kind of give her a smirk lol.

The kiss actually seemed to make her more comfortable though, as she then kind of cuddle up next to me and she put her legs on my lap. I then started to rub her legs as we were watching the movie and then after about 10 minutes, I kiss her again.

This time she seems really into it and she is breathing a little more heavy now. She start’s touching my shoulders and chest and I caress her hair, I rub her shoulders and legs. I then, pick her up and then throw her on the other couch, which is much longer and bigger.

I get on top of here and then she then get’s a little more into and she starts rubbing her hands up and down my chest (under my shirt). I start getting pretty turned on and then I start grabbing her big tits. I then pop her tits out of her shirt and then start sucking on her nipples. I then go back and forth with her boobs and making out wither, breaking into ear, sucking on her neck a bit, and then I proceed to go for her pussy. (Note: At some point here, she also put her boobs back in shirt). I start to rub the outside of her pussy, and then she moves my hand away. So, I go back to making out with her and I then try 2 more times and but she moves my hand away both times. Time to switch it up a bitch I think to myself.

I pull her up, so were both sitting up and making out now. She looks a little awkward now because she has her arms crossed like she is not sure what to do or she is afraid I’m going to attack her something. I just keep making out with her and eventually she dropped her arms and looked a little more comfortable. I then proceed to take off this little sweater/jacket she had on. She seemed a little hesitant but she didn’t give any resistance and now I had her in a tank top basically.

I then kind of pushed her down and went back on top of her, still making out with her. I then put my hand in the back of her pants and grabbed her big bare ass. I then star to move my hand to the front of her body, just above her pubic area and I start rubbing her around her belt. I then slide my hand into her pants and no resistance, just yet. But as soon, as I go for her pussy, she pulls my hand up but not out. She keeps my hand in her pants but won’t let me touch her pussy. I try 2 more times but she gives the same resistance. I then pull my hand out of her pants and stop the escalation completely.

I get off her and say..

Me: Wow, it’s getting hot.
( A few seconds late)
Her: What time is it?
Me: I Don’t know
( She gets up and grabs her phone)
Her: Oh wow, it’s already 12, it’s late, I should probably get going (I know this was bullshit but I guess she made up her mind she didn’t want to fuck me or I fucked up somewhere?)
Me: Alright

I then drove her home and let me tell you it was pretty awkward driving her home. She didn’t say much and was pretty quiet. It was very frustrating and I was disappointed that I could not get this done. I dropped her off and said thanks for the night and she had a good time and to text her. Well, I can tell you I never texted her after this and she never texted me.

Not sure really where I went wrong? I felt like maybe she had me on the fence between a Lover/Boyfriend categories. And I probably could of done better in my escalation. LMR strikes again. Fuck me eh? On to the NEXT

Lin (Cute Asian Girl)

Alright fellas, this is a bit of weird one and this date happened four days after I hung out with Sarah. Actually, my buddy “the mechanic” had taken her on 2 dates before I had went out with already and he kinda of “fucked her”, at least from what he told me on the second date. I didn’t really care though, I just thought I would of have some fun with this and practice some social skills and flirting and see what I could pull off with this girl. Maybe potentially become Eskimo Brothers with my wingman haha.

I don’t have the tinder conversation or text conversations but we had planned for Thursday night at 9 O’clock. I had started messaging her Sunday or Monday night on tinder and then Tuesday night she ended up messaging me this:

Her: What are you doing right now? 7:15PM
Me: Just kicking it back and watching some hockey. Hbu? 7:30PM
Her: Oh, well my plans got canceled tonight and I was going to see if you wanted to hangout. But it’s okay we can wait till Thursday. (Thirsty much?)
Me: Well, I don’t got much going on tonight, I could do tonight.
Her: Okay, what time?
Me: how does 9 work?
Her: Ya that sounds good. Ahhh one thing thought, I don’t drive.
Me: That’s okay, I could pick you up, if you want.
Her: Alright, I should probably get ready then, don’t want to look like a mess.
Me: haha a mess isn’t a bad thing ;) 8:30PM
Her: Well, that wouldn’t be good for the first date 8:50PM
Her: My address is *****
(So I leave and go pick her up and I show up at her house at around 9:05PM)
Me: Here

(No response and like 8 minutes go by and I am wondering wtf? I call her and no answer. I’m like wtf, is this girl standing me up? I was about to leave. She then texts me)

Her: Sorry, give me 5 minutes (Wow wtf this bitch ain’t even ready)
(10 more minutes go by and she finally comes out. I probably waited over 20 minutes. It was almost 9 30 at this point)

She comes out and then opens the door, gets in the car and then apologizes to me saying that her friend just called her or something just as she was heading out the door. Seemed a little odd.

So we end up driving by to a nearby bar just around her house and grab a drink. I park just on the road outside of this bar.

We sit down in a booth, she orders a Caesar, and I order a beer. We each pay for our own drinks. I deep diver her and we have some good dialogue going. A few important points of our conversation was that she actually brought my buddy “the mechanic”. She asked how I knew him because she saw that we were friends on Facebook. I just played it off, like I just knew him through a few friends of mine. Also, another point was somehow we got into talking about drugs, she starts telling me that she does MDMA before concerts and gets all fucked up. I take this and see this as a girl that’s very impulsive and I know that it’s just about time to pull, once we started talking about drugs. Last, important point was that she lived on her own with a few roommates. After about an hour of talking, I just decide to pull.

The Pull (10:30ish)

Her: Ahhh I want a glass of water but it looks like there busy.
Me: mhmm. Do you want to get out of here?
Her: Yes
Me: Okay
So we walk outside and head back to my hair. Kid me not, it was fucking freezing this night. It was so dam cold outside, I fucking hated it. We jump in the car, I crank the heat up to full blast and we try to warm up.
Me: Is there anywhere you wanted to go or do? (Don’t know why I said this, I kind of hesitated a bit and made a rather somewhat weak remark)
Her: Oh no, it doesn’t matter to me.
Me: Alright, well I’d invite you back to my house but I’m little further out. How about we go back to your place and chill? (Again like I said earlier I’m trying to work on imposing on people and doing it right)
Her: Ohh, I don’t think we can tonight. My one roommate is sleeping already and he doesn’t like it when I bring people over this late. (Again another girl doesn’t seem comfortable inviting me over, oh well I can always improvise)
Me: Oh really eh?
Her: Ya, he usually gets mad if people are over and it’s late at night, especially when he has to go to school tomorrow.
Me: Alright, well we can just back to my house then. I’ll drive you back home later.
Her: Oh, we can always do it another time. It’s a little far.
Me: It’s not that far, it’s only about 10 minutes away.
Her: Alright, ya I guess.

So, we then proceed back to my house and then we go downstairs. It’s just around 11PM. I offer her a water and she accepts and then she sits down on my couch and I throw a movie on. And I believe it was Broken City. Meh decent movie.

So, after about 10 minutes, I go in for the kiss. And it was a bit awkward because she barely moved in, as I went in to kiss her. We ended up making out for like 30 seconds and then both pulled back at the same time, followed by me saying… “you have soft lips”. She replies…. “thanks…Wow, that was very bold, like very bold and unexpected”. I just smirk at her and say “ya”. She then asks for a blanket and I give her one.

She then kind of gets into awkward positions, where she is all cuddled up with her body, she’s like squeezing her knees to her chest. I’m thinking to myself it’s going to be kind of hard to kiss her again, if that’s what her body language is like.

After about 10-15 minutes, I then try to kiss her, after it looked like she loosened up a bit. I go in and she doesn’t even move, she actually pulls back.

Her: Ahhhhhh….. no more kissing, no more kissing.
Me: Okay
So wtf? This is odd, in my head now, I’m like wtf am I going to do. So 10 minutes go by and then I start thinking about driving her home and getting her out of here because it just doesn’t seem like she’s going to do anything. Also, she seemed more into the movie then me, like wtf lol.
I get up for a second to grab my water, and then she says to me
Her: how much longer is this movie because I am getting kind of tired.
Me: oh it’s like an hour longer, we can always watch it another time. I’m kind tried to, I’ll drive you home.
Her: Oh okay, ya the movie seems pretty cool but I’m just kind of tired.

So I drove her back, once again frustrated and disappointed. I got to stop driving these girls back home, especially if I haven’t fucked them. It’s such a demoralizing feeling and pain in the ass. It’s like I just lost a sports game like hockey and now I’m getting booed by the opposing crowd as I’m going home.

P.S. My buddy “the mechanic” fucked her the next night and I guess she was talking some shit about me to him the next night. Saying things.. like she didn’t like how I didn’t pay for her drink, and then I tricked her to come home with her. All bullshit lmfao. Whatever girls are silly and cute.

Stefanie

So, a little breakdown of Stefanie: This girl actually went to my high school, yet she was a year older and not very popular from what I remember. I never had talked to her anything but I know who she was because a friend of mine took her to prom. I would consider this girl probably somewhere in my extended social circle. Anyways, she had added me on Facebook about a few months ago and I contemplated messaging her to set something up but I decided against it. And then a few days ago, we ended up matching on tinder and I messaged her.

Tinder

Me: Looks like we both have great taste ;)
Her: haha I guess so 
Me: haha how’s the tinder world treating ya?
Her: lol I haven’t been on it in months. Hbu?
Me: haha really? It’s been a pretty interesting experience lol
Her: lol ya it got boring for me. But that’s good haha
Me: Cool lol. I notice we have each other on facebook? How about we grab a drink or bite sometime soon? 
Her: haha sure 
Me: haha alright shoot me a text *** *** ***** or send me your number and we can set something up 
Her: Sounds good 

Texting (Friday Night)

Her: Hey it’s Stef 
Me: Hey Stef, what’s going? 
Her: nothing much lol. Hbu?
Me: Nice. Just kicking it back :p. So, what’s your schedule like?
Her: I’m free every night except Tuesday and next Friday.
Me: Alright, well how does Sunday or Monday evening for you?
Her: Sunday works 
Me: Okay, how about we grab a drink Sunday night…. Say 8:30PM at Zip’s? 
Her: Sounds good 
Me: Alright great, I’ll see ya Sunday 
Her: Okay 

Saturday

Her: How was your weekend?  9:30PM
Sunday
Me: Good! Just been relaxing all weekend. Are we still on for tonight? 
Her: That’s good! Mhmmmm!
Me: Okay, I’ll see ya tonight!
Her: Sounds good 

So, we end up showing up to this bar at around the same time. We both parked in the same lot, so we walked in together. As we walked in, we grabbed a table and sat down. The waitress comes over and we both order a beer.

And then I begin deep diving her. Now, this girl was exactly the type of girl that was recently described in Colt’s article about awkward girls. This girl was shy, awkward and a little nerdy. I did about 85-90% of the talking, which started to make things hard on me after a while. After about 40 minutes of doing some deep diving, things started to get a bit awkward. We had a few awkward stares and laughs and I even found myself repeating myself a few times. I could tell she was nervous, because she started going on her phone and texting? So, after this, I just decided to pull because well let’s face it, things could of kept getting awkward so I just pulled.

The Pull

Me: Hey, it’s getting kind of busy and loud in here. Do you want to get out of here? We can go back to my place and watch a movie and chill?
Her: Ya, Okay.
Me: Alright, will get the bill and go.
(So the waitress comes over and gives us the bill, it’s like 12 bucks and I ask her if she wants to split)
Me: Mhmm. Do you want to split?
Her: I don’t have any cash on me. (She expected me to pay lol?)
Me: Okay?
Her: I just got debit
Me: Okay, well it’s 12 bucks, I got 6 bucks on me, I can give you this and then you just me with your debit.
Her: Umm.. Okay.

So, she ends up paying and then we get out of there. She gets in her car and then follows me back to my house.

My House

So we get back to my house just around 10PM, and we go downstairs. However, my mom is up and she starts teasing me a bit calling me Casanova and shit because it’s like the third broad I have had over in a week and a half. Fuck me lol. My mom, then goes to bed shortly after I get home though.

So, me and Stef are downstairs and then I offer her water but she declines. We then sit down on my couch, next to each other and I throw a movie on.

So before, I began this escalation and I wanted to focus on making this escalation more mutual (e.g., I put my hand on her chest, she puts her hand on my chest. Alek’s article on LMR explains this well) and I also didn’t want to look to pushy/needy. Basically, I was trying to change my strategy up and it make different from the last two girls I was trying to fuck.

As were watching this movie, she seems very nervous, as she is constantly on her phone and texting. I try to look at her phone and she’s like holding her phone tight and texting her friends or something. So, after about 15-20 minutes, I just go in for this kiss and she is right into it. She begins making out with me somewhat passionately and I was a little surprised by this. So we makeout for maybe a minute and then she pulls back. I then say.. “you have very soft lips”.

Now, after we makeout, she looked a lot more comfortable with me. She put her phone down and then kind of cuddled up next to me by placing her legs on me. Similar to what Sarah did (the girl above) did before. I begin rubbing her legs back and forth, while were watching a movie. We talk a bit but I don’t make another move, until the movie is over.

After the movie is over, probably about an hour went by after I first made out with her. I begin kissing her after the movie is over and we begin making out. I caress her hair, I rub her shoulders and legs and then I place her hand on my head and chest. When I placed her hand on my chest, it seemed like she didn’t know what to do and she just left it there. Kind of awkward but that explains her personality.

After making out for a few minutes, she pull backs and say’s… I should probably get going. I respond “okay” and go back to making out with here. She makes out with me for a few seconds and then pulls back again and asks for phone because she can’t find it. She ended up dropping it in the couch lol.

After, she gets her phone, she get’s up and then starts getting ready to leave. I end up walking her out of my house and then she gives me a big hug before she leaves and says good night? LOL… Did I just get boyfriend zoned? I think so…. Fuck lol

Alright, guys I’m working hard to get over this first date sex issue but I am having a tough time. I’m not sure if these girls boyfriend zone me or if I am off in my escalation. It’s getting frustrating because I feel like I should have converted on at least 1 or 2 of these girls. Also, it’s starting to mentally fatigue because I keep getting to the same point with these girls but I can’t seem to overcome this resistance. Any thoughts, comments or feedback would be appreciated.

All the best,

Rdawg
 

ray_zorse

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Aug 12, 2014
Messages
1,982
Re: FR++x3: First Date Sex Struggles

Dawg I think I might be able to see the problem, it looks like a compliance building issue to me. This is kinda my specialty so I am gonna rant a bit, now possibly I should be getting more lays than I am, but when it goes well it goes super smooth (until I fuck up some way hahaha) because I am building compliance from the outset. Here are some suggestions.

When you meet her -- lead her into the shop, choose a table (the other day I actually visited the area in the morning just to choose a shop and a table in that shop because I consider this so important), and using correct tonality order her to sit in a certain place. Then, look at the menu with her, get out a $10 note, give it to her, and order her to go over to the register and order for you, telling her what you'll have. Or alternatively if it's like Starbucks etc do this as you enter the store, saying you'll find a table, then afterwards tell her where to sit. Or if you're running late, text her your order, etc. You get the picture anyway.

During the date you can get compliance in various ways such as by having her look after your wallet and phone while you go to the bathroom... another good one, I would say essential, is to order her to give you her hand, then comment on her jewellery, etc... I'm sure there are more ways too but I don't really need them because then I hit them with my zinger which I will describe, you may need to find your own zinger though (as you have a basement I suggest finding some activity you can do in the basement which she won't know how to do). If it seems to be going well you could also try ordering her to come back with you (or to your car), risky but has worked for me.

What I then do is pull her home for cooking date(tm). Like if it's a daytime date then maybe get some rice and nori paper from a Japanese store on the way home (ordering her to choose and pay for some beer from the fridge section), and make California rolls together. I start by saying "you will be my kitchen hand" (no ifs or buts or polite requests here) and then proceed to order her around the kitchen "pass me a knife from the drawer here" or "grab a board and cut these up". Initially I'll occupy myself with some task such as unloading the dishwasher or mopping the floor while she cooks per my specifications, then as she gets more comfortable I'll stand behind her telling her what a sexy kitchen hand she is and holding her by the waist and feeling her back, her sides, her arse and so forth. If she's concentrating on a task her defenses seem to be down I think. Don't forget to congratulate her at every step of the process and high five her when she nails something difficult too.

So when I award her a break on the couch and start to escalate for real I get the usual LMR and I respond to it by firmly ordering her to get those pants off, and getting them off. Works a treat. Off hand I can think of four times I've followed this process (and other times a bit differently) and although I ran into various problems like not being able to get it up, or non smooth escalation after that, it really does solve the problem you're encountering. The golden rule is basically that asking for compliance tells you with no possiblility for bullshit where you stand with a girl.

Another thing to do is to give orders while escalating, such as having her caress your chest, play with your nipples etc.

Hope that helps. Great work on Tinder btw. Colt would be proud of you ;)

-Ray

Edit: As you noted you also have to not reward resistance. There was a hilarious report by Mr.Rob in which she resists and he tells her she can go sleep outside with the dog. Also DrexelScott has a bit to say about showing her the door...
 

RDawg

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Jul 7, 2014
Messages
419
Re: FR++x3: First Date Sex Struggles

ray_zorse said:
Dawg I think I might be able to see the problem, it looks like a compliance building issue to me. This is kinda my specialty so I am gonna rant a bit, now possibly I should be getting more lays than I am, but when it goes well it goes super smooth (until I fuck up some way hahaha) because I am building compliance from the outset. Here are some suggestions.

When you meet her -- lead her into the shop, choose a table (the other day I actually visited the area in the morning just to choose a shop and a table in that shop because I consider this so important), and using correct tonality order her to sit in a certain place. Then, look at the menu with her, get out a $10 note, give it to her, and order her to go over to the register and order for you, telling her what you'll have. Or alternatively if it's like Starbucks etc do this as you enter the store, saying you'll find a table, then afterwards tell her where to sit. Or if you're running late, text her your order, etc. You get the picture anyway.

During the date you can get compliance in various ways such as by having her look after your wallet and phone while you go to the bathroom... another good one, I would say essential, is to order her to give you her hand, then comment on her jewellery, etc... I'm sure there are more ways too but I don't really need them because then I hit them with my zinger which I will describe, you may need to find your own zinger though (as you have a basement I suggest finding some activity you can do in the basement which she won't know how to do). If it seems to be going well you could also try ordering her to come back with you (or to your car), risky but has worked for me.

What I then do is pull her home for cooking date(tm). Like if it's a daytime date then maybe get some rice and nori paper from a Japanese store on the way home (ordering her to choose and pay for some beer from the fridge section), and make California rolls together. I start by saying "you will be my kitchen hand" (no ifs or buts or polite requests here) and then proceed to order her around the kitchen "pass me a knife from the drawer here" or "grab a board and cut these up". Initially I'll occupy myself with some task such as unloading the dishwasher or mopping the floor while she cooks per my specifications, then as she gets more comfortable I'll stand behind her telling her what a sexy kitchen hand she is and holding her by the waist and feeling her back, her sides, her arse and so forth. If she's concentrating on a task her defenses seem to be down I think. Don't forget to congratulate her at every step of the process and high five her when she nails something difficult too.

So when I award her a break on the couch and start to escalate for real I get the usual LMR and I respond to it by firmly ordering her to get those pants off, and getting them off. Works a treat. Off hand I can think of four times I've followed this process (and other times a bit differently) and although I ran into various problems like not being able to get it up, or non smooth escalation after that, it really does solve the problem you're encountering. The golden rule is basically that asking for compliance tells you with no possiblility for bullshit where you stand with a girl.

Another thing to do is to give orders while escalating, such as having her caress your chest, play with your nipples etc.

Hope that helps. Great work on Tinder btw. Colt would be proud of you ;)

-Ray

Edit: As you noted you also have to not reward resistance. There was a hilarious report by Mr.Rob in which she resists and he tells her she can go sleep outside with the dog. Also DrexelScott has a bit to say about showing her the door...


Ray

Thanks for the detailed response, much appreciated!

Reading through your post a few times, I can see where I might be going wrong myself.

So when I award her a break on the couch and start to escalate for real I get the usual LMR and I respond to it by firmly ordering her to get those pants off, and getting them off. Works a treat. Off hand I can think of four times I've followed this process (and other times a bit differently) and although I ran into various problems like not being able to get it up, or non smooth escalation after that, it really does solve the problem you're encountering. The golden rule is basically that asking for compliance tells you with no possiblility for bullshit where you stand with a girl.

I think this might explain it well to me, especially the part where you firmly order a girl to take her pants off. I think Chase suggested something similar to me once when dealing with LMR. I have never ordered a girl to take her clothes off her anything, it usually just happens for me where I can take her clothes off with little resistance or she just does it without me say anything. So this something new I am going to have to try next time when I am struggling hard with LMR. However, it's all about building that compliance though first.

Thanks Ray,

- Rdawg
 

ray_zorse

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Aug 12, 2014
Messages
1,982
Re: FR++x3: First Date Sex Struggles

No worries man it's nice to be appreciated. I was thinking about the issue throughout the day yesterday and I realized I forgot to mention what it says in Chase's ebook that helped me (although it's prob just hammering the point home unnecessarily) -- the 3 stages of compliance are: compliance requests, compliance demands, taken compliance e.g.:
-- "can I see your jewellery"
-- "give me your hand"
-- just taking her hand and looking at it.
What he says is that escalation is actually taken compliance which is why you should try to move through the first 2 stages first (unless you are skipping steps cos not needed, I guess this would happen if she's an auto invester / escalating on you). I mainly focused on compliance demands in my earlier post which is why I wanted to clarify, taken compliance is not really a big part of my process though it prob should be.

I also had some ideas which might work for u and which I am planning to try myself. The first is sticking with the cooking theme but adapting to nightgame, what about having a bar fridge with some pineapples, cherries etc in it, and having her cut stuff up and put together some complicated drinks like pina coladas with umbrellas and cherries and whatnot... The other idea is a bit more evil, how about having a flat packed coffee table from IKEA partly unpacked on the floor in front of the couch, a complicated one where you have to bolt in the legs etc... tell her you were partway through assembling it when your friend called u to go out... say you've got to fix the Internet so u can watch the film and meanwhile order her to put the coffee table together... hehehe okay this may be OTT but I'll at least try it and let u know how it pans out :) :)

-Ray
 
a good date brings a smile to your lips... and hers

RDawg

Tribal Elder
Tribal Elder
Joined
Jul 7, 2014
Messages
419
Re: FR++x3: First Date Sex Struggles

Ray

Thanks for clarifying yourself about the compliance demands and the additional feedback! Haha, the bar fridge is a pretty solid idea. Me and my parents were actually discussing getting one for outside, with a little mini bar next to our hot tub. That would be epic for seduction but I got to wait till the weather get's a little warmer and I can make that happen. Anyways, the examples are great and they've given me a few creative ideas already ;)

Great stuff Ray!

- Rdawg
 
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