You be the Chooser

trashKENNUT

Cro-Magnon Man
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I find that this is a useful and great mindset to put into process everytime you going to look to pickup a girl.

"You Are The Chooser"

You would want to know what is, that you want in a women, blond hair? brown hair? huge a$$? shapely bust? whatever it is. By adopting this thoughts and mindset, you are indeed going out screening and picking women of your choice, you tend to avoid unnatural body language or project needy vibe when you go and meet them.

Try it out, you notice women tend to take notice of your more stronger vibe. :)

Zac
 

The Tool

Tribal Elder
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I like it Zack, essentially specializing so you become more confidant.

And by going after what you find most attractive you are going to overcome approach anxiety far faster because you are going after what you feel you shouldnt screw up on most, and if your going to be scared or nervious about anything- its approaching exactly what you want. Well done.
 

Chase

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Zac-

There are two interesting schools of thought on this. One is, "I am the chooser, I know what I want!" and the other is, "Women are the choosers, plain and simple; that's how it is, that's how it'll always be."

While it's definitely better to be the chooser than it is to be the chosen, for my money, the best is to throw out thoughts about who's choosing him altogether. e.g., it's kinda like playing a strategy game and trying to decide if you're the aggressor or the defender... probably better not to worry yourself about it, and just build up your defense then go on the offense.

With girls, have your set of traits / qualities / standards you're looking for, and live by them. Then meet the girls who spark your interest and meet those standards, and try to move things forward with them. You won't always make it, but sometimes you will. Who's the chooser? Well, realistically, you both are. You chose her, and not some other girl, and she chose you, and not some other guy.

However, if it helps you get more excited and makes you more effective, then by all means - be the chooser! And if you've been coming from a mindset of "trying to be chosen," this is certainly a more helpful mindset than that alternative.

I'll tell you my mindset when it comes to choosing... when I'm talking to a girl, the thought is, "She KNOWS I am the best, sexiest, most amazing man she could possibly get. The only thing at play here is whether she thinks she can leverage me into being her boyfriend by slowing this seduction down long enough, which means we never become lovers OR partners, or whether I can shut down the boyfriend frame well enough without scaring her off or throwing her into auto-rejection to keep things moving forward at an acceptable pace that won't lead to me wasting my time or hers." I might succeed, or I might not, on any given occasion with any given girl... but that's the thought process.

So rather than being the chooser, you might instead choose to focus on of course, you've already chosen her and she's already chosen you, but the question here is, can you push the buttons she needs pushed to help her into one of the most amazing experiences with a man she will ever have?

Chase
 

trashKENNUT

Cro-Magnon Man
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Chase said:
So rather than being the chooser, you might instead choose to focus on of course, you've already chosen her and she's already chosen you, but the question here is, can you push the buttons she needs pushed to help her into one of the most amazing experiences with a man she will ever have?

I choose her and she choose me. I could not have a better description. Speechless :))

Zac
 

Little Jester

Tool-Bearing Hominid
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I like to filter instead of choose...
Kinda the same thing, but from a different angle.

I feel the mindset of "I am choosing" probably benefits "zero in on girl" behavior. "Okay, so I choose you, who are you?"
Well, I've been there and it didn't work for me like that. I got too obvious, too open to the girl I choose. Too much needy behavior from me / showing too much interest. Going out of my way to pursue that what I choose. I think me choosing a girl automatically puts her on a pedestal above all the other girls I didn't choose.

So on to filtering. Instead of looking for what I like in a girl, I consider all girls equal at first and then start looking at what I don't want in them. Too fat for me? Out! Too old for me? Out! Don't like her face? Out!

Passed my first impression filter? Reward her with eye contact, sexy smile and a wink.
Get a shy look away, or a sexy smile back? Golden! Just passed her first impression filter too. Now let's move things forward and see if she passes my personality filter...

Maybe I'm a bit too judgemental like this, but at least I keep my options open early and screen them out effectivly along the way, because of not trapping myself in the "she's the one for the night" mentality that maybe works for some, as I can see it coming off really strong if done right, but just doesn't work for me (yet?).
 

trashKENNUT

Cro-Magnon Man
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Little Jester said:
I like to filter instead of choose...
Kinda the same thing, but from a different angle.

I feel the mindset of "I am choosing" probably benefits "zero in on girl" behavior. "Okay, so I choose you, who are you?"
Well, I've been there and it didn't work for me like that. I got too obvious, too open to the girl I choose. Too much needy behavior from me / showing too much interest. Going out of my way to pursue that what I choose. I think me choosing a girl automatically puts her on a pedestal above all the other girls I didn't choose.

So on to filtering. Instead of looking for what I like in a girl, I consider all girls equal at first and then start looking at what I don't want in them. Too fat for me? Out! Too old for me? Out! Don't like her face? Out!

Passed my first impression filter? Reward her with eye contact, sexy smile and a wink.
Get a shy look away, or a sexy smile back? Golden! Just passed her first impression filter too. Now let's move things forward and see if she passes my personality filter...

Maybe I'm a bit too judgemental like this, but at least I keep my options open early and screen them out effectivly along the way, because of not trapping myself in the "she's the one for the night" mentality that maybe works for some, as I can see it coming off really strong if done right, but just doesn't work for me (yet?).

Don't worry man, If it works for you, and you get quality women that you like, it is fine. :)

Zac
 

trashKENNUT

Cro-Magnon Man
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Hey Girlschase moderators,

Is it possible to combine this post and then continue with this link?

PLS READ: How Believing In The Afterlife Might Help You Get GIrls

This 2 posts are based on 2 school of thoughts. Proactive and Reactive (per se)

Thank you. It will help.
 

West_Indian_Archie

Tribal Elder
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293
In a practical sense, 99% of the time the man chooses who he interacts with.

By culture/custom, women can only choose to be with the guys that are trying to get their attention.

Because of this dynamic, As a man, I always get what I go after.

To be more clear, the only things I have in life, are things that I pursued. They are of my efforts. So everything I have, I chose.

But I don't have everything I've ever wanted. Most men don't have everything they want.

Whereas a woman, even if she has a lot to choose from, she can only take the best of what is offered.

She cannot pursue a man of her choosing. (And when you do see it, it's a drunk fat girl saying "fuck it" what do I have to lose)
She can only "luck out". She wants this really handsome guy that will sweep her off of her feet, be stern, be loving, be caring, indulge her, correct her, etc. If that man doesn't swipe right on her profile, or come across her in real life - her only weapons are too look more beautiful (a race that she ultimately loses) and be seen in more places. She is passive.

And as a practical consequence, if you look at what women say they want in a man/sex partner, and look at what they actually get - you'll see it's an illusion. She wants a 6'2" handsome investment banker, meanwhile she's sucking off a guy that's 5'9" that is an assistant manager at a car rental company. Despite her desires, she must always settle.

She has a multiple choice test, where nothing is really right. We have a blank canvas and an infinite number of paints to choose from.

In practice, when we as men deal with women who are on the fence, skeptical, not interested - we can make attempts to change her orientation. Never by logical argument, but often by understanding her psychology both in the short term and the long term.

We are not always successful, but we are active in our pursuit, and exhibit behaviors that often change the girl's in the moment emotional calculus.
  • "I didn't notice you until you talked to me"
  • "I didn't like you when I first met you"
  • "We have nothing in common, but we're together"
These things happen to regular guys that do not study seduction.
These guys do not try to alter their behavior to accommodate the chaos of female psychology.

Just following a minimum protocol of the "crimson arts" puts a man in a better position to get the girl that he wants.

WIA
 

Velasco

Modern Human
Joined
Nov 11, 2019
Messages
1,059
In a practical sense, 99% of the time the man chooses who he interacts with.

By culture/custom, women can only choose to be with the guys that are trying to get their attention.

Because of this dynamic, As a man, I always get what I go after.

To be more clear, the only things I have in life, are things that I pursued. They are of my efforts. So everything I have, I chose.
powerful mindset.
She cannot pursue a man of her choosing. (And when you do see it, it's a drunk fat girl saying "fuck it" what do I have to lose)
She can only "luck out". She wants this really handsome guy that will sweep her off of her feet, be stern, be loving, be caring, indulge her, correct her, etc. If that man doesn't swipe right on her profile, or come across her in real life - her only weapons are too look more beautiful (a race that she ultimately loses) and be seen in more places. She is passive.

And as a practical consequence, if you look at what women say they want in a man/sex partner, and look at what they actually get - you'll see it's an illusion. She wants a 6'2" handsome investment banker, meanwhile she's sucking off a guy that's 5'9" that is an assistant manager at a car rental company. Despite her desires, she must always settle.
Cope
We are not always successful, but we are active in our pursuit, and exhibit behaviors that often change the girl's in the moment emotional calculus.
  • "I didn't notice you until you talked to me"
or "where did you come from??" as if you just appeared from outta thin air :)
 

trashKENNUT

Cro-Magnon Man
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Messages
6,337
Fog was noting about 'sexual prizing'.

I realize that there's levels to it.

- Mindset
- Ideology
- Method
- Cultural
- Actual Materialism (Aventador, AP, etc)

And then there's DHV by passive or proactive (above pointers)

Females just smell passive DHV. Usually something that you can't really lie/create a facade (proactive DHV).

z@c+
 
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