In a practical sense, 99% of the time the man chooses who he interacts with.
By culture/custom, women can only choose to be with the guys that are trying to get their attention.
Because of this dynamic, As a man, I always get what I go after.
To be more clear, the only things I have in life, are things that I pursued. They are of my efforts. So everything I have, I chose.
But I don't have everything I've ever wanted. Most men don't have everything they want.
Whereas a woman, even if she has a lot to choose from, she can only take the best of what is offered
She cannot pursue a man of her choosing
. (And when you do see it, it's a drunk fat girl saying "fuck it" what do I have to lose)
She can only "luck out". She wants this really handsome guy that will sweep her off of her feet, be stern, be loving, be caring, indulge her, correct her, etc. If that man doesn't swipe right on her profile, or come across her in real life - her only weapons are too look more beautiful (a race that she ultimately loses) and be seen in more places. She is passive.
And as a practical consequence, if you look at what women say they want in a man/sex partner, and look at what they actually get - you'll see it's an illusion. She wants a 6'2" handsome investment banker, meanwhile she's sucking off a guy that's 5'9" that is an assistant manager at a car rental company. Despite her desires, she must always settle.
She has a multiple choice test, where nothing is really right. We have a blank canvas and an infinite number of paints to choose from.
In practice, when we as men deal with women who are on the fence, skeptical, not interested - we can make attempts to change her orientation. Never by logical argument, but often by understanding her psychology both in the short term and the long term.
We are not always successful, but we are active in our pursuit, and exhibit behaviors that often change the girl's in the moment emotional calculus.
- "I didn't notice you until you talked to me"
- "I didn't like you when I first met you"
- "We have nothing in common, but we're together"
These things happen to regular guys that do not study seduction.
These guys do not try to alter their behavior to accommodate the chaos of female psychology.
Just following a minimum protocol of the "crimson arts" puts a man in a better position to get the girl that he wants.