- Joined
- Jun 28, 2021
- Messages
- 412
Hi guys,
Let me start with some background: my experience mostly stems from Tinder (most of my lays), night game and some social circle game. I'm an intermediate overall and pretty novice in day game.
Two months ago I decided to focus on day game big time. I go out to a huge shopping mall with amazing traffic around 3 times per week. I feel like I have made massive massive progress during this time. Before I had started doing this I very, very rarely approached women during day time. Now, I can approach single sets and double sets with almost no problems. I also approached triples and mother-daughter situations. In the recent days I approached and settled instadate with the best women I met in the mall (8.5, 9), really the hottest chicks I've ever dated, only had less than 10 dates with girls of this calibre in my whole life. These days I'm able to approach and date them from day game with relative easy. Which is awesome. Seems like I have the approach part handled well.
Secondly, I don't have much problems to get instadates. In the last 5 times I went out I had 4 instadates, sometimes on the first approach, sometimes with as little as 3 approaches.
My botttleneck is instadates. Out of about 15 instadates I was able to convert them to a lay or a blowjob only 3 times.
I ponder there could be two potential problems:
1) Relationship talk. I like honest approach to dating. I always tell them what's up. I'm in open-relationship (fwb) with few girls and I date other when I feel like. Whenever they ask me about this, I just tell them what's up. However, I feel like these conversations are often somehow combative. I tell them what I do, and they tell me what they are looking for, but it always feel like some kind of negotiations. These discussions seem very rational, business-like. I see like they somehow try to raise stakes, by telling me like she was dating some super succesful dude, or like they used to love sex and had plenty of sex, and now they are looking for a relationship. I don't know exactly how I screw this, but I have intuition that these conversations derail my dates. I'm thinking about stopping these conversations altogether and go "Have no expectations whatsoever, let's see what universe brings us." Is this somehow being too unattainable issue? They just seek to reject me before I reject them?
2) Oversexualise. Another issue seems to me oversexualising during dates. This more applies when I date girls which are not that hot. When I invite them for instadate, we always seat on a sofa, next to each other. We talk and I carress their hand and arm, and sometimes even their naked knee or a thigh. Sometimes I give them hand massage and sometimes I give them a delicate neck massage. I never kiss as I realised during my night game and Tinder experience that this usually backfires. I prefer to keep it for isolated place. Either way, I realised that sometimes I do it too much, I go too far, they become scared, and they do everything to escape.
My instadates usually take about 2 hours, after that they want to leave. I usually ask them to change venue (go for a walk, drink, or something) but they always say no. So I let them go away. I used to take their phone number/Instagram, but texting never led to anything, so these days I usually let them go and go back to approaching.
I admit I don't have a good plan after instadate. Well, I had a plan to bounce venue but it never worked. They already auto-rejected themselves I guess, or they rejected me.
Any ideas? Thanks in advance
Let me start with some background: my experience mostly stems from Tinder (most of my lays), night game and some social circle game. I'm an intermediate overall and pretty novice in day game.
Two months ago I decided to focus on day game big time. I go out to a huge shopping mall with amazing traffic around 3 times per week. I feel like I have made massive massive progress during this time. Before I had started doing this I very, very rarely approached women during day time. Now, I can approach single sets and double sets with almost no problems. I also approached triples and mother-daughter situations. In the recent days I approached and settled instadate with the best women I met in the mall (8.5, 9), really the hottest chicks I've ever dated, only had less than 10 dates with girls of this calibre in my whole life. These days I'm able to approach and date them from day game with relative easy. Which is awesome. Seems like I have the approach part handled well.
Secondly, I don't have much problems to get instadates. In the last 5 times I went out I had 4 instadates, sometimes on the first approach, sometimes with as little as 3 approaches.
My botttleneck is instadates. Out of about 15 instadates I was able to convert them to a lay or a blowjob only 3 times.
I ponder there could be two potential problems:
1) Relationship talk. I like honest approach to dating. I always tell them what's up. I'm in open-relationship (fwb) with few girls and I date other when I feel like. Whenever they ask me about this, I just tell them what's up. However, I feel like these conversations are often somehow combative. I tell them what I do, and they tell me what they are looking for, but it always feel like some kind of negotiations. These discussions seem very rational, business-like. I see like they somehow try to raise stakes, by telling me like she was dating some super succesful dude, or like they used to love sex and had plenty of sex, and now they are looking for a relationship. I don't know exactly how I screw this, but I have intuition that these conversations derail my dates. I'm thinking about stopping these conversations altogether and go "Have no expectations whatsoever, let's see what universe brings us." Is this somehow being too unattainable issue? They just seek to reject me before I reject them?
2) Oversexualise. Another issue seems to me oversexualising during dates. This more applies when I date girls which are not that hot. When I invite them for instadate, we always seat on a sofa, next to each other. We talk and I carress their hand and arm, and sometimes even their naked knee or a thigh. Sometimes I give them hand massage and sometimes I give them a delicate neck massage. I never kiss as I realised during my night game and Tinder experience that this usually backfires. I prefer to keep it for isolated place. Either way, I realised that sometimes I do it too much, I go too far, they become scared, and they do everything to escape.
My instadates usually take about 2 hours, after that they want to leave. I usually ask them to change venue (go for a walk, drink, or something) but they always say no. So I let them go away. I used to take their phone number/Instagram, but texting never led to anything, so these days I usually let them go and go back to approaching.
I admit I don't have a good plan after instadate. Well, I had a plan to bounce venue but it never worked. They already auto-rejected themselves I guess, or they rejected me.
Any ideas? Thanks in advance
