Discussing Your Bodycount with Girls?

[Ambiance]

How do you guys like to handle discussing the topic? Both in and out of relationships.

I've had a lot of success implicitly or explicitly revealing myself as a bit of a manwhore when picking up or while on dates. I love framing it as "girls making it so easy on me" (which makes it less my fault, and is mostly true!), and have so many wild stories that girls just eat up. Naturally, I get asked how many girls I have had a lot. I usually will answer with a smirk or say something like "I'm a virgin, those stories I told you don't count because she was under 5'9" ", or "I lost track after the first 250" if I can tell the girl is very anxious about it, followed by telling her I am just kidding and hugging her. Then I'll let her try guessing and keep messing with her before eventually confirming roughly where it is at. Girls without fail will accordingly view me as both a romantic and sexual big prize to be won, and treat me as such.

This *kind of* backfires once I get in a more serious relationship, in the sense that it is something the girl is intimidated by and continually insecure about. Historically I can mostly alleviate these concerns when they pop up with kisses and words of affirmation, but there is no changing how a girl views you. I also exclusively date girls with low bodycounts (currently writing an LR about an Indian Princess Jasmine look-a-like virgin I deflowered and have been seeing for ~2 months). Girls I just see casually are generally less threatened since they are less invested and usually are more experienced.

Maybe it would be better if I only admitted to whatever a particular girl is comfortable with when a relationship is in question (her hesitant guess +/- 2)? Or avoided the topic altogether? I don't want to scare off the future mother(s) of my children.

 

[Alpha13SC]

I don t reveal it, but if you portret yourself that way, make sure to get tested when going in a relationship. I passed some things already.

 

[TomInHo]

I personally don’t reveal that much anymore because I haven’t found it necessary

Girls can usually tell I’m experienced from how comfortable I am around them, how easily I talk about sex and how fast I’m able to get intimate with them

I prefer to have them feeling like I’m being genuine because even when I downplay things a lot of girls will still think I’m a manwhore

Also makes retention post lay easier and I noticed girls are more open to continuing things if they are unsure if I’m a cold hearted player

Less is more sometimes and it can also allow them to imagine you how they wish you could be

 

[Ambiance]

I don t reveal it, but if you portret yourself that way, make sure to get tested when going in a relationship. I passed some things already.

Absolutely. I get tested quarterly. I recommend every guy get tested at least twice a year.

I personally don’t reveal that much anymore because I haven’t found it necessary

Girls can usually tell I’m experienced from how comfortable I am around them, how easily I talk about sex and how fast I’m able to get intimate with them

I prefer to have them feeling like I’m being genuine because even when I downplay things a lot of girls will still think I’m a manwhore

Also makes retention post lay easier and I noticed girls are more open to continuing things if they are unsure if I’m a cold hearted player

Less is more sometimes and it can also allow them to imagine you how they wish you could be

Very well said. This is the direction I am leaning. Experience speaks for itself, and girls will mentally project on you whatever range of numbers they are comfortable associating with being very experienced when they allow themselves to think about it. It also helps if your bodycount is somewhat nebulous since she can't attach to any assertions and what they entail as easily. If your real number is outside this range and is brought to her attention, that is where cognitive dissonance comes in and they fear they are reading you wrong or that they are out of their depth with you.

One thing I forgot to mention in my first post: I am implicitly non-exclusive in more serious relationships (while expecting exclusivity), and intend to be so at least until I have kids. This is part of why I thought it would help if my girlfriends realized I am not your run-of-the-mill successful guy who has had just a few girlfriends and a handful of ONSs.

I may stop confirming roughly what my bodycount is, and instead let her come up with a number based on intuition and how many stories I tell her. This might be the best way to have my cake and eat it too.

 

[topcat]

Only ever had it come up with long term chicks, and i refuse to tell…

It’s a dumb question anyway, she doesn’t want to know what the number is, she wants to know the likelihood that you’ll care for a girl like her and remain invested in her. Tell her a high number and she’ll go off and make the assumption that you don’t (some rare cases may see it as a prize - that she was the one of hundred-odd to lock you down, but a chick like that probably has a high count anyway..).

Instead show her you care and that the body count doesn’t matter, just as you would if you were seducing a real whore (in this case You are the whore and you’re guiding her through the seduction).

 

[Kaida]

So how do you guys find out her body count without revealing your own (if evaluating her for long term)? Usually she’ll ask you right back if you ask hers

Or does that not matter to y’all either

 

[topcat]

So how do you guys find out her body count without revealing your own (if evaluating her for long term)? Usually she’ll ask you right back if you ask hers

Or does that not matter to y’all either

i don’t care what it is. with enough experience you can sus it out by the way she carries herself and they tell on themselves anyway if you’re nonjudgmental…

i genuinely don’t care though. i care about how she treats me..

 

[Ambiance]

So how do you guys find out her body count without revealing your own (if evaluating her for long term)? Usually she’ll ask you right back if you ask hers

Or does that not matter to y’all either

This article covers what your are looking for very succinctly: https://www.girlschase.com/content/how-many-partners-has-your-girlfriend-had-find-out-here

 

[Hue]

My natural buddies say their golden number is "7" even though they're all in like the 50+ range.

I stopped counting after 100+ because I realized that it literally doesn't matter, quality is what you should be after.


When a girl asks me (and it's usually just a shit test, I recently got asked how many girls I see a week, and how often I go on dates) I just give them some ridiculously high number so they know I'm kidding.

A classic agree and amplify.


Body Count
"Let's see... I think I'm at 1...2..3... 3479. No wait, 3480. Haha forgot about that crazy day at Bible study. *super warm and cheerful smile* "

Girls a Week
"Well it's Wednesday, so 19 so far. Gotta stay in shape you know?"

Dates
"Depends, are we including my 13 sugar mommas? Because I don't really consider it a date when I'm just collecting 200$ as I pass Go."


Rinse and repeat, then change the subject. Lol.

 

[LimeLight]

No number will satisfy her, just be vague and avoid the question by joking. Any real answer won't really help. In my personal experience and with guys who have much more lays than me, I've aske what to do about this and they mentioned never revealing your body count. Mines not even high.

 

[Derek da man]

I can't even remember mine. When I'm out with friends reminiscing they sometimes say "Do you remember that girl you were seeing . . . . " and then I realize she's not in my count anyway.

 

[Adventurer]

Discussing body count is probably a bad idea, it would sound like boasting at best and hurt availability at worst (fuckboy label)

Occasionally I revealed it when it was sub 10, for attainability reasons, when the girl thought I was a heartless player and I was like nah, I only had X girls

On the other hand, telling stories about when you fucked a specific girl in the past, incidentally and because it's relevant in context, is extremely good. It builds preselection for free and steers the convo to a sexual topic, without boasting

For LTR I would just say I don't know and didn't keep count

 

[rockstar]

Good answers here that match my experience.

When I first was getting really into game/pickup, I always tried to insinuate that I was a really experienced player (when I wasn't). I thought it was showing value/preselection. But being a manwhore isn't valuable to girls. She's going to feel insecure and think that you see her as "just some girl to fuck", and that you're unattainable. If you're decent at game, girls are going to assume you're really experienced anyway (always asking you how many other dates you've been recently, etc). I don't think most girls would even believe me if I told them the number now - it's unrelatable to most people.

Girls don't want to have meaningless hookups with playboy rockstar ballers who fuck 10 new girls a week. That is not their fantasy. They want to get the guy who all the other girls want, but who's really picky and only gets with really high-quality girls. They want to be special. They want to win and win over the cool guy who has high standards, because that validates them.

 

[West_Indian_Archie]

Chica - So what's your body count?
WIA - Guess!
Chica - says number
WIA - oh you're good, do you generally have an intuition about people....

Even if it's a serious conversation, don't return entertain the topic.

 

[Karea Ricardus D.]

I don't think it's ever a good idea to discuss that. If the number is low, you're a loser, if it's high, your a player... we actually had a specific routine to preempt the question and make sure she never asks it... basically we did the question game routine and one of the rules was that no question can ever be repeated, and then we asked first so now she can't ask about it.

 

[Hue]

So this is a gambit where you ask her her own lay count? That's really interesting.

How do you do this without triggering ASD?

Either way she'll lie, lol. But I'd he worried about grazing her urge to push a low body count frame.

I don't think it's ever a good idea to discuss that. If the number is low, you're a loser, if it's high, your a player... we actually had a specific routine to preempt the question and make sure she never asks it... basically we did the question game routine and one of the rules was that no question can ever be repeated, and then we asked first so now she can't ask about it.

 

[Chad Tyrone]

Shouldn't branch off into red pill stuff on here but I remember when reading one of Rollo's books back in the day he talked of answering the question with "I don't keep records" smirkingly iirc .

Can't for the life of me find the excerpt from the book but this one comes close

Redirect Notice

More along the lines of just being vague and having lost count.

That's really interesting.

How do you do this without triggering ASD?

Either way she'll lie, lol. But I'd he worried about grazing her urge to push a low body count frame.

Tactics Tuesdays: How to Screen Her on Touchy Topics

Women conceal the past. So how do you get the skinny on them on touchy topics… Without them shutting down or blowing up? A reader named Eric writes in: “Hey, just wondering how do you screen a girl for topics that she might not want to talk about or for things that wouldn’t be in her best...

www.girlschase.com

Lol,you could get her to open up on that just by operating from the "frame" of the article I linked you to .

But it'd be kinda going against the routine when you ask her directly.You know open up yourself before asking her as recommended in the article.

I'm thinking of maybe talking about how many girls you've slept with without being really specific about the no but it's hard to do that without being braggadocious .

Anyways, there's some research out there that talks of how girls are more honest post-sex.Maybe ask her after closing the deal to avoid triggering ASD.

And most of the time you'll be getting honest answers.

As always come across non-judgmental, casual and stoic even after hearing shocking numbers ,lol ,and you'll be good.

More and more you'll also realize that if you compare what they've told you with all that's in the "how many partners has she been with" article , their answers are true.

Best way ,ime ,to get her to open up about her laycount without me necessarily having to talk about mine and triggering ASD

Chad Tyrone

 

[Chad Tyrone]

*their answers are usually true

 

[Chase]

I did the “talk about it honestly with low count LTRs” thing at first and it doesn’t help you at all and just creates extra friction. You get girls who are shocked at first, then talking about how they want to “get more experience” now to be more like you, or they talk about you having no standards and being willing to sleep with anyone. Or they frame you as lacking in self-control, which is a bad frame for LTRs, etc.

So at this point it’s “Ah, you know, not that much. You’re at how many? Yeah, probably a little bit more than that. I used to drink a lot and some of those memories are kind of hazy. It was a bad habit, that’s why I don’t drink like that anymore.”

Like @TomInHo says they can tell you’ve shagged a bunch just from how you are. You don’t need to be dropping numbers on them so they know you can shag other girls if you want to.

Like @Hue, I had a natural friend who said if the girl was very inexperienced he’d tell her his count was 4, and if she was more experienced he’d tell her 15 or 17, “somewhere around there” (his real count was >250).

But you’re fine just having her tell you where she is at then saying a little bit more than that. People aren’t good at gauging skill/experiential differentials significantly above theirs. If she’s at 3 lays, she’s not going to have a good radar for the difference between a guy who’s at 5 lays vs. a guy who’s at 150 lays. She can only tell “Yeah, he is more experienced than me.”

Also, girls are rarely totally honest about their kill counts anyway. So you not being super honest Mr. Facts is par for the course here.

Plus, if your answer is “Yeah, a little bit higher than yours” it is vague enough that you aren’t nailing yourself down to anything firm where if you tell her it’s a low number and then over the years tell her stories about chicks you’ve shagged and she at some point puts it together that you’ve told her about a lot more shags than just “a few more than she is at”… then suspects there are probably a lot more… that you are getting yourself into drama territory.

Also: be careful telling your chicks stories about your other shags!

99% of the times they ask you for these it’s a trap!

Tell her about the time you adopted a puppy instead!

e.g.

HER: Tell me about one of your hookups.​

​

YOU: How about I tell you about the golden retriever I saved from the SPCA instead? That dog was the greatest!​

Chase

 

[Karea Ricardus D.]

So this is a gambit where you ask her her own lay count? That's really interesting.

How do you do this without triggering ASD?

Either way she'll lie, lol. But I'd he worried about grazing her urge to push a low body count frame.

without ASD - I'll tell you in PM if you really want to know, I don't like to give my verbatim verbiage.