- Joined
- Dec 30, 2019
- Messages
- 233
Context (social circle)
So this girl and I are doing some recreational class together which is a program where 9 people get together for 6 different meetups over the period of 6 weeks.
The 5 other men in the class have really needy body language when talking to the girls. This does not exclude me. I occasionally also have some slightly needy body language. But in general I behave in a super outcome independent manner and the girls are always attracted to it.
From the moment I walked in, I could tell she was quite attracted to me. Throughout the course, she gave me a lot of IOIs.
Fast forward to the sixth and last class of the course, where everyone knew we may not see each other again. 9 of the students, plus the teacher agreed to go to a bar to get drinks.
That night, the whole class ended up spending more than 6 hours together. Throughout the last night, she was giving me huge IOIs, like just actively trying to converse with me in front of everyone else. Giving me a really seductive stare while flirting with another needy guy. Keep asking me about my life. etc etc.
I decided during the night that since this was social circle and I want to limit my learning of seduction to people I don't know from real life, I would remain platonic and unsexual with her.
The night ends and we part ways and I thought I'd never see her again and then that very night she texts me after she leaves.
About me
I am a 22/23 year old virgin. Been daygaming for 9.5 months. Went on 16 dates from daygame. These dates only evolved into physical escalation 3 times.
This is my first social circle date.
My usual logistics
Park my car at secluded parking lot in car park on top of a mall. Walk her there after whatever date there is. Get her in the back seat. I directly tell the girl
to sit in the back and don't try to get her to sit in the front at all.
Texting
Day 1
So initially that morning when I replied to her message at 0821, I told myself that I'm just going to remain friends with her.
Then she sends me the way too obvious message at 0950.
The reason that I don't want to date girls from social circle is that I've had some pretty bad experiences from high school with girls
throwing me under the bus and me being an idiot and I'm just afraid to deal with that again.
But now I realised that girls chasing me this hard in social circle is something that I'm never gonna be able to run away from fully. I may
be going back to in-person school within the course of this year and there's bound to be a ton of more situations like this.
So my logic was I'd just be a nice guy and just let this girl reject me as opposed to being the one to reject her. There's no guarantee that my
game is going to improve immensely by the time I get back to school so I might as well get some experience dating social circle girls and dealing
with the negative social consequences (if any). If she's gonna spread negativity about me let her do it. I'll just do everything I can to make her
feel good.
So I decided... to hell and war with my fears.
Day 2
So here she sends me the address of some cafe 40mins away from the mall where I normally take my dates (and also where my seduction location is) and this cafe is very close to her house.
I didn't know the logistics of her living conditions so I decided not to head over to her neighbourhood for the date. This was based on the article
by Chase regarding how to ask a girl for her logistics. In that article, Chase comments that you do not want to be asking for her logistics too directly as it communicates that you think you already have her in the bag. Figuring out her logistics would require me to ask her over text and I felt that would be bad so I would just follow my normal process and ask what her logistics were on the date itself. If needed, I could use my car to get to her place as back up logistics.
Can anyone provide guidance on whether I made the right move here?
I've not had a girl 'invite' (did she invite me?) me to her neighbourhood/place in this way before. It turns out (from asking her on the date) that she has one house mate who she rents her own room from.
Day 3
The girl
She's Chinese and came to my city to do high school and university. She's done exchange programs in Europe before. I'm not sure what her age is but I think probably 25.
Conversation at first meeting up (At food place/bar)
Trying to set chase frames:
So this is my first time actually really going for using chase frames because there were genuinely so many times during the social circle meetups with this girl where she behaved in ways that could be framed as her chasing me.
My strategy was to just throw her quite a many chase frames and trying to seed as much of it as possible. I would say that I managed to get her to accept 25% of the chase frames that I threw at her. Which I'm not sure but probably was the case that did have quite a lot of impact on her.
After about 1 hour in the food bar we met, I used this one from Ricardus, which was:
And in fact she had given me such a look before during the last meetup when everyone was having a few drinks. After I used this one, I could tell that she knew I was onto her and she had trouble forming her sentences lol
Trying to set sexual frames:
She never opened up to me about her sexual stories but that's fair because I didn't share any of mine (i.e. my non-existent sexual experiences lol)
I spoke to her about a whole lot of material that GC taught me over the past few years. Of course, not telling her that I learnt it from GC but that I do understand what this stuff is about.
Now I think about it there's quite a lot of experience that she's had with sex but oh well. She didn't quite accept the sexual frames because we were just talking very logically about it. We talked about a lot of juicy stuff though. That would be gold for someone who is more experienced to escalate from:
Objectifying women, men always asking for permission to do things during sex, hookups and one-night-stands (she denied that she did this. Now I totally don't believe it). She did mention to me that she used dating apps.
I believe it still helped that we were talking logically about sex.
Touch:
I almost completely don't touch her because I just focus more on doing the sexual frames/flirting and chase framing. There are a only 2-3 times when I do touch her and let my touch linger for a while.
Pull and transition
So I suppose that I do make the ask for the pull quite awkwardly because I know she stays about 40 mins away and has her own room in an apartment that she shares with another housemate.
I just plainly ask about her logistics and her place and she sort of tells me but she says we should not go to her place this time. Maybe next time. I remain persistent and ask her what's some cool stuff to do around her place and she says there's this garden at the top of her apartment block so I say that she can bring me to see it and she just does some token resistance and agrees to it.
I theoretically did not have an excuse to go to her place, but I suppose if I did end up at the garden with her, there would be little reason for her to decline showing me her place or whatever. Definitely would be able to think of an excuse in the amount of time between now and then.
What I actually plan in my mind:
I told her that since I drove to where we were we would need to drive to her place and so she just follows me. I don't tell her that I plan to escalate in the car. Don't think she expected it.
I made the decision that it would not be a good idea to go to her place since it would take 40 mins to go there and her mood could change. I was way more comfortable with the car since I've been trying to get girls there since I started daygame 9 months ago and already managed to lead 6 girls there successfully. Thus far, I have never successfully gone to a girl's place. I've managed to drive into the apartment complex
She also said that she should not be bringing guys to her flat too often, or it would piss her flatmate off. Not sure how much of that was true but I decided not to risk it as I was not confident of handling more circumstances along the way.
We walk for about 10 mins to the car. Just that this time I tried to keep the conversation about sex and relationships as much as possible on the way there.
Then I do the same thing I always do.
I open the driver's seat and turn the key in the ignition without getting into the car and say:
Funny thing happened here:
She closes the front seat door and opens the back seat door and gets in the back seat and I get in the back seat about at the same time as her.
She asks me:
Somehow I think the emotional side of her brain wanted to be alone with me but her logical brain still thought we were going to drive to her place. Hilarious.
At seduction location (back seat of the car)
Passing first wave of shit tests:
Ok so can't really remember all the details. But just like: move closer, half man-handle kiss, peck her a few times, back away.
Some small chatter, I start rubbing her thigh. Then she throws shit tests.
So she throws me a few shit tests regarding:
What I want from her:
Here I just act 80-90% direct and tell her in a less chasey way that I desire her
And also some objections:
(not sure if these are objections though because I somehow deal with them very easily and never hear these again)
1. "I don't know you very well"
2. "This is too fast for me"
My response and how the situation unfolds
I back off from her body and stop touching her or trying to kiss her. I remember NewBieWinner's advice to deal with objections so I thought she doesn't feel that she knows me enough yet to mean that she wants to have more deep conversation with me so I try to give it to her.
I just have somewhat? a heart-to-heart conversation with her and just be quite direct about my desire. She just continues to shit-test saying it's okay I don't need to be disappointed maybe next time. I state that I've told her what I'm looking for from her and I'm confused on what she's looking for from me, and I don't get defensive. Me saying out loud that I'm "confused by what she wants from me" actually reminds me that she hasn't actually been opening up to me even though she is openly-enough (in a semi-logical way) discussing sexual topics.
I think of this as some form of push-pull I used since she just didn't stop throwing shit to tell her that something about her feels a bit off. I talk about how she's incongruent from the way she behaved in our class and also what she showed me on our date thus far, because at this very moment I did feel that there was something she was quite conscious of that she was not opening up to me/sharing about. I tell her I'm a simple guy and I've made my intentions super clear and I say to her face she's just acting dumb and can't expect me to believe her front because I know she's smart.
She doesn't stop the shit tests and just keeps asking me the same questions to which I hold my previous responses and just close off my body language and as it turns out they were just shit tests because then we had this exchange:
Then suddenly the shit tests come to an abrupt halt and she starts laughing in quite an involuntary way as though she not really in control of her emotions. Her legs also start trembling quite significantly. Her face feels desirous rather than fearful.
I think she also said (not sure whether it was at this exact moment but it was quite early in the escalation):
Second wave of tests: Leadership tests I failed? (hope to get advice on what happened here)
Unfortunately can't remember all the details here exactly.
Now I try to throw more chase frames. I thought I should try to take her shoes off so I simply ask her:
Then she says no, and can't remember how she said it but she said something along the lines of "you know what I'll take them off"
and then she just takes them off. I take my shoes off as well.
I ask her to sit closer and she complies. Then I slowly run my hands to the now more-accessible parts of her body.
I believe what happened then was that she leaned in very close to my face and smiled. So she hints that she wants me to kiss her. I tell her mischieviously to ask for it. And she starts laughing and I just continue running my hands across her body.
Some shit test I read about in some other field report before:
About a minute later, she just keeps leaning in towards my face to try to kiss me and I respond by moving my body backwards to back away from her but not stopping her. It even gets to the point where it looks like she is crawling over my chest. And she eventually reaches my lips.
I really didn't know what to do here or what's going on with this because this hasn't happened to me before. I just kiss her and she doesn't use tongue. I hesitated in pulling away so it felt as though it wasn't clear who broke the kiss. I suppose that my response here showed that I was quite inexperienced.
Sexual tickling
I don't know why girls do this but they use their finger tips to tickle my thighs. I get noticeably excited by these tickles so the girl must notice these too.
What do these mean and how should I respond to them? Idk how to not get excited by these things since I legit have not experienced a woman's touch before...
Hope I'm not taking too much of a skeptical view on this but the above smells like more leadership test material.
My response to this was just to look away and say nothing and try to play it off or do the same thing to her. Sounds like another wrong move from me.
Sexual hints:
She also took my index finger and started rubbing the web between her index finger and thumb on my index finger to imitate sex. Not sure what I was supposed to do here so I just tried doing some chase frames.
I get the feeling that these are leadership tests which I failed. Could someone give me advice on these? (I wrote more about it in the remarks for readers section below)
Time-marker:
This is to indicate that I'm quite sure that everything that I am writing about before this point in this field report happened before everything I'm writing about after this point in this field report
Bad escalation skills failing me (or maybe just her having a bit of fun?):
Anyways, I wrote the prior section on how I may have fked up the escalation before writing this part of the field report so I realise that it might be the case that by the point in time of this paragraph, I may already have lost the game. May be the case that she was just having a bit of fun beyond this point.
I'll just keep it brief since I don't think there's much new shit I encountered anyways.
I just keep running my hands over her body to try to turn her on but she does not allow me to rub her pussy. I try a lot of times to get to her pussy but she just stops me. She also prevents me from accessing her breasts.
I try licking her neck/chin/jaw/ears but that doesn't get anywhere either. She does the same thing and just blocks her sensitive parts.
So the escalation sort of dies down cos I'm like lost for fking ideas. And I quite clearly remember her quite playful and consciously just suddenly killing the vibe and and saying she really needs to work the next day and needs to leave.
I initially thought that this was an escalation window that I did not manage to make use of but after thinking about the sexual-leadership test thing, it feels like she was just having a bit of fun feeling desired by me and having me try to escalate on her while she knew exactly where she was going to stop me. The previous and only time so far I failed to make use of an escalation window and let it close, the girl started throwing a shit ton of tests at me. With this girl, she just consciously and happily stopped me after I kept trying to escalate on her but did not manage to get anywhere with it. It did feel as though she got bored of my escalation.
All my attempts to stop her from leaving don't work. I don't believe there was much I could do anyways. It really did seem clear that the dynamic was that she was not following my lead and she was doing whatever she wanted.
Insightful thing that happened when she left:
I put on my shoes and get out of the car to face her (she had gotten out of the car first). I probably know I lost, but thought since I will see her again I should end it off slightly diplomatically :/? I don't know...
We're sort of facing each other standing up in the car park, and I say:
This makes me think that sex was really the only thing she was looking for from me.
Remarks/questions for readers
1. My read of the overall sequence of events from start to finish:
My theory is that: from the first time I met her, this girl was craving quite a sexually-experienced and dominant man to fk her. Somehow it seems that I'm the closest thing in our class to that from my IDGAF attitude and my somewhat decent outcome independence. She hides behind the friends frame throughout the course of the date and waits to see what I do. She keeps telling me that she thought we were just friends and painting a picture of herself as a good girl. I take her to my car to try to fk her and the real tests come out. She realises I'm quite inexperienced so she drops me. The thing that I'm unsure and curious about is whether the only thing she was looking for from me was sex. Haven't had a girl behave like this to me before actually. Perhaps because this is the first time I've put some sexual framing into the date and gotten better at suppressing my boyfriend value.
2. Over the course of writing this report, I've had 2 different interpretations of what happened in the car:
My initial thinking was: After what I referred to above as "her first wave of tests" which I passed, there was just some kissing or playing around, and this was supposed to be some kind of escalation window where I had to use physical escalation to turn her on. Because my physical escalation skills were too lousy, it did not arouse her enough to make her want to give me access to her pussy. And I failed in that
My thinking upon reflection was: She was actually continuing to test me after that "first wave of tests" and I demonstrated during these tests that I was
sexually inexperienced. Following that, my physical escalation was actually just me chasing her to give me sex. Since there was a period of time where I was just simply trying to turn her on, and she was just taking it and somewhat enjoying it, she was probably just having a good time feeling desired.
My second theory sounds a lot more legit. Can someone who knows what's going on confirm?
3. If it is the case that my second theory is more legit, can someone give some kind of idea as to what kind of high-value/bedroom-leading behaviour is expected of me?
I didn't really come across this in HTMGC. There's probably some kind of alluding to this in several GC articles, but I've actually never seen an article specifically talking about bedroom-chasing or the high value/sexually competent ways to lead a girl sexually. I have not actually read a field report which actually writes in full detail about how to lead a girl in the bedroom to first-time sex in a high value/sexually competent way so I will go look those up. If anyone knows of such detailed field reports where the girl challenges your sexual leadership and how the guy correctly handled the challenges, could you share the links to them?
4. The positive side of things: Firstly, my embodiment and confidence of the mindset that women want+love sex improved quite a bit. Throughout the date, she outright denied that she was into meeting guys to hook up with them but I remained confident that all I needed to do was to make things happen. And as it turned out, she did want sex. I have never been this confident about me wanting sex AND the girl wanting sex. Second, I think I actually got her quite aroused in the moments leading up to us reaching the car. When she left the car, she couldn't even remember very well how to get out of the car park. Quite an improvement, and showed that I can arouse girls too. Third, somehow I really grew in inner confidence after this date... because of that initial horrible feeling that the girl is dropping me because I am not sexually competent/experienced enough for her (which is the truth). I realised after a day or 2 that it is simply how much experience/skill a guy has got in his mind or body and has got nothing to do with how valid my identity is. Fourth, the first girl that pulled in my life about 6 months ago, was a lot more good-looking than this girl, and a lot more forgiving of my sexual inexperience even though I cold approached her. Fifth, very proud of myself for just charging straight into my fears. In fact, there's a good chance I'll see her again with all the other class buddies. I 100% hope that happens so that I can see what the social consequences of it really are.
Thank you for reading!
Y
So this girl and I are doing some recreational class together which is a program where 9 people get together for 6 different meetups over the period of 6 weeks.
The 5 other men in the class have really needy body language when talking to the girls. This does not exclude me. I occasionally also have some slightly needy body language. But in general I behave in a super outcome independent manner and the girls are always attracted to it.
From the moment I walked in, I could tell she was quite attracted to me. Throughout the course, she gave me a lot of IOIs.
Fast forward to the sixth and last class of the course, where everyone knew we may not see each other again. 9 of the students, plus the teacher agreed to go to a bar to get drinks.
That night, the whole class ended up spending more than 6 hours together. Throughout the last night, she was giving me huge IOIs, like just actively trying to converse with me in front of everyone else. Giving me a really seductive stare while flirting with another needy guy. Keep asking me about my life. etc etc.
I decided during the night that since this was social circle and I want to limit my learning of seduction to people I don't know from real life, I would remain platonic and unsexual with her.
The night ends and we part ways and I thought I'd never see her again and then that very night she texts me after she leaves.
About me
I am a 22/23 year old virgin. Been daygaming for 9.5 months. Went on 16 dates from daygame. These dates only evolved into physical escalation 3 times.
This is my first social circle date.
My usual logistics
Park my car at secluded parking lot in car park on top of a mall. Walk her there after whatever date there is. Get her in the back seat. I directly tell the girl
to sit in the back and don't try to get her to sit in the front at all.
Texting
Day 1
So initially that morning when I replied to her message at 0821, I told myself that I'm just going to remain friends with her.
Then she sends me the way too obvious message at 0950.
The reason that I don't want to date girls from social circle is that I've had some pretty bad experiences from high school with girls
throwing me under the bus and me being an idiot and I'm just afraid to deal with that again.
But now I realised that girls chasing me this hard in social circle is something that I'm never gonna be able to run away from fully. I may
be going back to in-person school within the course of this year and there's bound to be a ton of more situations like this.
So my logic was I'd just be a nice guy and just let this girl reject me as opposed to being the one to reject her. There's no guarantee that my
game is going to improve immensely by the time I get back to school so I might as well get some experience dating social circle girls and dealing
with the negative social consequences (if any). If she's gonna spread negativity about me let her do it. I'll just do everything I can to make her
feel good.
So I decided... to hell and war with my fears.
1641 Me: If u promise to be good, we can hang out
1644 Me: (The project) I'll have a look at it later
2000 Her: (Some advice she got from our class)
2001 Her: Have you watched (movie)? I wanna watch it!
2146 Me: Not sure who gave you that advice haha
2148 Me: Go find some friends to watch it with then
2150 Me: Let's meet for food or drinks
Day 2
So here she sends me the address of some cafe 40mins away from the mall where I normally take my dates (and also where my seduction location is) and this cafe is very close to her house.
I didn't know the logistics of her living conditions so I decided not to head over to her neighbourhood for the date. This was based on the article
by Chase regarding how to ask a girl for her logistics. In that article, Chase comments that you do not want to be asking for her logistics too directly as it communicates that you think you already have her in the bag. Figuring out her logistics would require me to ask her over text and I felt that would be bad so I would just follow my normal process and ask what her logistics were on the date itself. If needed, I could use my car to get to her place as back up logistics.
Can anyone provide guidance on whether I made the right move here?
I've not had a girl 'invite' (did she invite me?) me to her neighbourhood/place in this way before. It turns out (from asking her on the date) that she has one house mate who she rents her own room from.
Day 3
Day 6
The girl
She's Chinese and came to my city to do high school and university. She's done exchange programs in Europe before. I'm not sure what her age is but I think probably 25.
Conversation at first meeting up (At food place/bar)
Trying to set chase frames:
So this is my first time actually really going for using chase frames because there were genuinely so many times during the social circle meetups with this girl where she behaved in ways that could be framed as her chasing me.
My strategy was to just throw her quite a many chase frames and trying to seed as much of it as possible. I would say that I managed to get her to accept 25% of the chase frames that I threw at her. Which I'm not sure but probably was the case that did have quite a lot of impact on her.
After about 1 hour in the food bar we met, I used this one from Ricardus, which was:
And in fact she had given me such a look before during the last meetup when everyone was having a few drinks. After I used this one, I could tell that she knew I was onto her and she had trouble forming her sentences lol
Trying to set sexual frames:
She never opened up to me about her sexual stories but that's fair because I didn't share any of mine (i.e. my non-existent sexual experiences lol)
I spoke to her about a whole lot of material that GC taught me over the past few years. Of course, not telling her that I learnt it from GC but that I do understand what this stuff is about.
Now I think about it there's quite a lot of experience that she's had with sex but oh well. She didn't quite accept the sexual frames because we were just talking very logically about it. We talked about a lot of juicy stuff though. That would be gold for someone who is more experienced to escalate from:
Objectifying women, men always asking for permission to do things during sex, hookups and one-night-stands (she denied that she did this. Now I totally don't believe it). She did mention to me that she used dating apps.
I believe it still helped that we were talking logically about sex.
Touch:
I almost completely don't touch her because I just focus more on doing the sexual frames/flirting and chase framing. There are a only 2-3 times when I do touch her and let my touch linger for a while.
Pull and transition
So I suppose that I do make the ask for the pull quite awkwardly because I know she stays about 40 mins away and has her own room in an apartment that she shares with another housemate.
I just plainly ask about her logistics and her place and she sort of tells me but she says we should not go to her place this time. Maybe next time. I remain persistent and ask her what's some cool stuff to do around her place and she says there's this garden at the top of her apartment block so I say that she can bring me to see it and she just does some token resistance and agrees to it.
I theoretically did not have an excuse to go to her place, but I suppose if I did end up at the garden with her, there would be little reason for her to decline showing me her place or whatever. Definitely would be able to think of an excuse in the amount of time between now and then.
What I actually plan in my mind:
I told her that since I drove to where we were we would need to drive to her place and so she just follows me. I don't tell her that I plan to escalate in the car. Don't think she expected it.
I made the decision that it would not be a good idea to go to her place since it would take 40 mins to go there and her mood could change. I was way more comfortable with the car since I've been trying to get girls there since I started daygame 9 months ago and already managed to lead 6 girls there successfully. Thus far, I have never successfully gone to a girl's place. I've managed to drive into the apartment complex
She also said that she should not be bringing guys to her flat too often, or it would piss her flatmate off. Not sure how much of that was true but I decided not to risk it as I was not confident of handling more circumstances along the way.
We walk for about 10 mins to the car. Just that this time I tried to keep the conversation about sex and relationships as much as possible on the way there.
Then I do the same thing I always do.
I open the driver's seat and turn the key in the ignition without getting into the car and say:
Funny thing happened here:
She closes the front seat door and opens the back seat door and gets in the back seat and I get in the back seat about at the same time as her.
She asks me:
Somehow I think the emotional side of her brain wanted to be alone with me but her logical brain still thought we were going to drive to her place. Hilarious.
At seduction location (back seat of the car)
Passing first wave of shit tests:
Ok so can't really remember all the details. But just like: move closer, half man-handle kiss, peck her a few times, back away.
Some small chatter, I start rubbing her thigh. Then she throws shit tests.
So she throws me a few shit tests regarding:
What I want from her:
Here I just act 80-90% direct and tell her in a less chasey way that I desire her
And also some objections:
(not sure if these are objections though because I somehow deal with them very easily and never hear these again)
1. "I don't know you very well"
2. "This is too fast for me"
My response and how the situation unfolds
I back off from her body and stop touching her or trying to kiss her. I remember NewBieWinner's advice to deal with objections so I thought she doesn't feel that she knows me enough yet to mean that she wants to have more deep conversation with me so I try to give it to her.
I just have somewhat? a heart-to-heart conversation with her and just be quite direct about my desire. She just continues to shit-test saying it's okay I don't need to be disappointed maybe next time. I state that I've told her what I'm looking for from her and I'm confused on what she's looking for from me, and I don't get defensive. Me saying out loud that I'm "confused by what she wants from me" actually reminds me that she hasn't actually been opening up to me even though she is openly-enough (in a semi-logical way) discussing sexual topics.
I think of this as some form of push-pull I used since she just didn't stop throwing shit to tell her that something about her feels a bit off. I talk about how she's incongruent from the way she behaved in our class and also what she showed me on our date thus far, because at this very moment I did feel that there was something she was quite conscious of that she was not opening up to me/sharing about. I tell her I'm a simple guy and I've made my intentions super clear and I say to her face she's just acting dumb and can't expect me to believe her front because I know she's smart.
She doesn't stop the shit tests and just keeps asking me the same questions to which I hold my previous responses and just close off my body language and as it turns out they were just shit tests because then we had this exchange:
Her: This is too fast for me to be getting intimate
Me: (I suddenly recalled this from the boards) Who said we were gonna get intimate?
Then suddenly the shit tests come to an abrupt halt and she starts laughing in quite an involuntary way as though she not really in control of her emotions. Her legs also start trembling quite significantly. Her face feels desirous rather than fearful.
I think she also said (not sure whether it was at this exact moment but it was quite early in the escalation):
Second wave of tests: Leadership tests I failed? (hope to get advice on what happened here)
Unfortunately can't remember all the details here exactly.
Now I try to throw more chase frames. I thought I should try to take her shoes off so I simply ask her:
Then she says no, and can't remember how she said it but she said something along the lines of "you know what I'll take them off"
and then she just takes them off. I take my shoes off as well.
I ask her to sit closer and she complies. Then I slowly run my hands to the now more-accessible parts of her body.
I believe what happened then was that she leaned in very close to my face and smiled. So she hints that she wants me to kiss her. I tell her mischieviously to ask for it. And she starts laughing and I just continue running my hands across her body.
Some shit test I read about in some other field report before:
About a minute later, she just keeps leaning in towards my face to try to kiss me and I respond by moving my body backwards to back away from her but not stopping her. It even gets to the point where it looks like she is crawling over my chest. And she eventually reaches my lips.
I really didn't know what to do here or what's going on with this because this hasn't happened to me before. I just kiss her and she doesn't use tongue. I hesitated in pulling away so it felt as though it wasn't clear who broke the kiss. I suppose that my response here showed that I was quite inexperienced.
Sexual tickling
I don't know why girls do this but they use their finger tips to tickle my thighs. I get noticeably excited by these tickles so the girl must notice these too.
What do these mean and how should I respond to them? Idk how to not get excited by these things since I legit have not experienced a woman's touch before...
Hope I'm not taking too much of a skeptical view on this but the above smells like more leadership test material.
My response to this was just to look away and say nothing and try to play it off or do the same thing to her. Sounds like another wrong move from me.
Sexual hints:
She also took my index finger and started rubbing the web between her index finger and thumb on my index finger to imitate sex. Not sure what I was supposed to do here so I just tried doing some chase frames.
I get the feeling that these are leadership tests which I failed. Could someone give me advice on these? (I wrote more about it in the remarks for readers section below)
Time-marker:
This is to indicate that I'm quite sure that everything that I am writing about before this point in this field report happened before everything I'm writing about after this point in this field report
Bad escalation skills failing me (or maybe just her having a bit of fun?):
Anyways, I wrote the prior section on how I may have fked up the escalation before writing this part of the field report so I realise that it might be the case that by the point in time of this paragraph, I may already have lost the game. May be the case that she was just having a bit of fun beyond this point.
I'll just keep it brief since I don't think there's much new shit I encountered anyways.
I just keep running my hands over her body to try to turn her on but she does not allow me to rub her pussy. I try a lot of times to get to her pussy but she just stops me. She also prevents me from accessing her breasts.
I try licking her neck/chin/jaw/ears but that doesn't get anywhere either. She does the same thing and just blocks her sensitive parts.
So the escalation sort of dies down cos I'm like lost for fking ideas. And I quite clearly remember her quite playful and consciously just suddenly killing the vibe and and saying she really needs to work the next day and needs to leave.
I initially thought that this was an escalation window that I did not manage to make use of but after thinking about the sexual-leadership test thing, it feels like she was just having a bit of fun feeling desired by me and having me try to escalate on her while she knew exactly where she was going to stop me. The previous and only time so far I failed to make use of an escalation window and let it close, the girl started throwing a shit ton of tests at me. With this girl, she just consciously and happily stopped me after I kept trying to escalate on her but did not manage to get anywhere with it. It did feel as though she got bored of my escalation.
All my attempts to stop her from leaving don't work. I don't believe there was much I could do anyways. It really did seem clear that the dynamic was that she was not following my lead and she was doing whatever she wanted.
Insightful thing that happened when she left:
I put on my shoes and get out of the car to face her (she had gotten out of the car first). I probably know I lost, but thought since I will see her again I should end it off slightly diplomatically :/? I don't know...
We're sort of facing each other standing up in the car park, and I say:
This makes me think that sex was really the only thing she was looking for from me.
Remarks/questions for readers
1. My read of the overall sequence of events from start to finish:
My theory is that: from the first time I met her, this girl was craving quite a sexually-experienced and dominant man to fk her. Somehow it seems that I'm the closest thing in our class to that from my IDGAF attitude and my somewhat decent outcome independence. She hides behind the friends frame throughout the course of the date and waits to see what I do. She keeps telling me that she thought we were just friends and painting a picture of herself as a good girl. I take her to my car to try to fk her and the real tests come out. She realises I'm quite inexperienced so she drops me. The thing that I'm unsure and curious about is whether the only thing she was looking for from me was sex. Haven't had a girl behave like this to me before actually. Perhaps because this is the first time I've put some sexual framing into the date and gotten better at suppressing my boyfriend value.
2. Over the course of writing this report, I've had 2 different interpretations of what happened in the car:
My initial thinking was: After what I referred to above as "her first wave of tests" which I passed, there was just some kissing or playing around, and this was supposed to be some kind of escalation window where I had to use physical escalation to turn her on. Because my physical escalation skills were too lousy, it did not arouse her enough to make her want to give me access to her pussy. And I failed in that
My thinking upon reflection was: She was actually continuing to test me after that "first wave of tests" and I demonstrated during these tests that I was
sexually inexperienced. Following that, my physical escalation was actually just me chasing her to give me sex. Since there was a period of time where I was just simply trying to turn her on, and she was just taking it and somewhat enjoying it, she was probably just having a good time feeling desired.
My second theory sounds a lot more legit. Can someone who knows what's going on confirm?
3. If it is the case that my second theory is more legit, can someone give some kind of idea as to what kind of high-value/bedroom-leading behaviour is expected of me?
I didn't really come across this in HTMGC. There's probably some kind of alluding to this in several GC articles, but I've actually never seen an article specifically talking about bedroom-chasing or the high value/sexually competent ways to lead a girl sexually. I have not actually read a field report which actually writes in full detail about how to lead a girl in the bedroom to first-time sex in a high value/sexually competent way so I will go look those up. If anyone knows of such detailed field reports where the girl challenges your sexual leadership and how the guy correctly handled the challenges, could you share the links to them?
4. The positive side of things: Firstly, my embodiment and confidence of the mindset that women want+love sex improved quite a bit. Throughout the date, she outright denied that she was into meeting guys to hook up with them but I remained confident that all I needed to do was to make things happen. And as it turned out, she did want sex. I have never been this confident about me wanting sex AND the girl wanting sex. Second, I think I actually got her quite aroused in the moments leading up to us reaching the car. When she left the car, she couldn't even remember very well how to get out of the car park. Quite an improvement, and showed that I can arouse girls too. Third, somehow I really grew in inner confidence after this date... because of that initial horrible feeling that the girl is dropping me because I am not sexually competent/experienced enough for her (which is the truth). I realised after a day or 2 that it is simply how much experience/skill a guy has got in his mind or body and has got nothing to do with how valid my identity is. Fourth, the first girl that pulled in my life about 6 months ago, was a lot more good-looking than this girl, and a lot more forgiving of my sexual inexperience even though I cold approached her. Fifth, very proud of myself for just charging straight into my fears. In fact, there's a good chance I'll see her again with all the other class buddies. I 100% hope that happens so that I can see what the social consequences of it really are.
Thank you for reading!
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