How could a woman use this site?

[theReason]

In all that description, I didn’t see you say how you “felt” about the guy at any point… only how you “categorized him.”

This makes me think, although you know when you’re “excited” or “disappointed,” that there is some kind of disconnect between your exhibited behavior (“you”) and your emotions. Excitement and disappointment levels are kind of… not exactly “emotions…” that is more like “energy level…”

Does that sound like it could be true, or do you consider yourself very in-touch with your emotions?

“If a guy isn’t turning me on, for whatever reason, I remove him from my life.”

Generally if a girl is not super turned-on by me for any reason, they will avoid me unless contractually obligated not to, i.e. employee-client, employee-employee, or obviously family. Even if I am offering some objective/subjective value, women generally avoid me unless 1.) I am sexually pursuing them and 2.) they are liking it. Both conditions have to be met, or no dice.

I am not saying “stay straight” is a conscious methodology, I am just observing behavior I’ve seen from sexually successful women who never seem to lose attraction for men (or love for the game) and where it seems to deviate from yours. I have also seen a girl turn lesbian from continuous exposure to sub-par men without “acting in-line with her emotions so as to protect her own feminine frame.” She also did a lot of the sort of dating-friending mix you did with a lot of guys she felt no certainty of attraction for. She may have even done that with me, but she would always act very… open and accepting but disinterested, but then she would also talk everybody’s shit behind their back—so it was like very difficult to trust her… which when lining it up with your case it could be said that to trust her was to trust her emotions, and if you can’t trust your own emotions, then guys may have a problem trusting you with their actions.

I assumed he was flirting with and bedding other women throughout all these weeks of meeting up.

I would say about 2% of men are sexually active to that degree at any given time.

Basically I thought he was getting his sexual fix from others while building a friendship with me based on intellectual compatibility.

Yeah no.

But I can see it is very difficult for a woman to tell when a man is acting with sexual interest versus when he is not, especially considering much of the time it’s a complicated mix of motivations and not so black and white as yes or no.

So it seems like, from my experience, the most libidinous women generally assume sexual motivations even when there are none, whereas you generally don’t assume sexual motivations where there are some.

So as much as I hate it when a girl assumes I am trying to get with her and starts playing the game in many disruptive ways when I am just doing normal life things that would benefit from a platonic frame of mutual respect, I’m going to say you need to assume sexual motivations more often.

I could try to explain the dynamics but it would be an even longer post than this one, so LMK.

 

[TomInHo]

Hmmm at @Lilly need some more stats

what’s your…

Race
Occupation
Weight
Height
Dress Size
Waist

And do you have any feminine female friends?

How often do you have others compliment you on your looks?

 

[Lilly]

Hmmm at @Lilly need some more stats

what’s your…

Race
Occupation
Weight
Height
Dress Size
Waist

And do you have any feminine female friends?

How often do you have others compliment you on your looks?

White. Somatic practitioner. 63kg. 1,73m. Size M. I don’t have a wrap-around measuring tape, but my waist tapers in and my stomach is flat but not fatless (total body fat between 20-25%).

Since Covid I don’t have any female friends at all because they all turned woke.

I’ve been told I’m attractive by men and women, but like random strangers coming up? Never.

 

[StrayDog]

White. Somatic practitioner. 63kg. 1,73m. Size M. I don’t have a wrap-around measuring tape, but my waist tapers in and my stomach is flat but not fatless (total body fat between 20-25%).

Since Covid I don’t have any female friends at all because they all turned woke.

I’ve been told I’m attractive by men and women, but like random strangers coming up? Never.

how dialed is your fashion?

 

[Lilly]

In all that description, I didn’t see you say how you “felt” about the guy at any point… only how you “categorized him.”

This makes me think, although you know when you’re “excited” or “disappointed,” that there is some kind of disconnect between your exhibited behavior (“you”) and your emotions. Excitement and disappointment levels are kind of… not exactly “emotions…” that is more like “energy level…”

Does that sound like it could be true, or do you consider yourself very in-touch with your emotions?



Generally if a girl is not super turned-on by me for any reason, they will avoid me unless contractually obligated not to, i.e. employee-client, employee-employee, or obviously family. Even if I am offering some objective/subjective value, women generally avoid me unless 1.) I am sexually pursuing them and 2.) they are liking it. Both conditions have to be met, or no dice.

I am not saying “stay straight” is a conscious methodology, I am just observing behavior I’ve seen from sexually successful women who never seem to lose attraction for men (or love for the game) and where it seems to deviate from yours. I have also seen a girl turn lesbian from continuous exposure to sub-par men without “acting in-line with her emotions so as to protect her own feminine frame.” She also did a lot of the sort of dating-friending mix you did with a lot of guys she felt no certainty of attraction for. She may have even done that with me, but she would always act very… open and accepting but disinterested, but then she would also talk everybody’s shit behind their back—so it was like very difficult to trust her… which when lining it up with your case it could be said that to trust her was to trust her emotions, and if you can’t trust your own emotions, then guys may have a problem trusting you with their actions.


I would say about 2% of men are sexually active to that degree at any given time.

Yeah no.

But I can see it is very difficult for a woman to tell when a man is acting with sexual interest versus when he is not, especially considering much of the time it’s a complicated mix of motivations and not so black and white as yes or no.

So it seems like, from my experience, the most libidinous women generally assume sexual motivations even when there are none, whereas you generally don’t assume sexual motivations where there are some.

So as much as I hate it when a girl assumes I am trying to get with her and starts playing the game in many disruptive ways when I am just doing normal life things that would benefit from a platonic frame of mutual respect, I’m going to say you need to assume sexual motivations more often.

I could try to explain the dynamics but it would be an even longer post than this one, so LMK.

Honestly, I didn’t really have emotions towards this guy. Like you said, I went through excitement/arousal and disappointment/turn-off. Of course I grieved and cried when he broke it off because he destroyed the platonic frame without warning and it was a shock. But I’m generally a person who doesn’t “have emotions” towards people. When I feel an intense nervous system reaction, I let it run through shamelessly to process it, regardless of what that looks like or how long it takes. I can add that I grew increasingly annoyed with him and felt sluggish at the prospect of going to his place to meet up.

Interesting! In my life I’ve had more male friendships than female, so I admit that my social conditioning around those dynamics may be off. I guess you could say that I don’t view men like default sex providers (or walking dicks), but conversation partners with whom to exchange insights, experiences, theories etc.

I certainly believed I was a lesbian or bi as a teen. When I had the chance to be with a woman though the reality of it disgusted me viscerally. I don’t gossip or talk shit about people behind their backs. That’s low. I was bullied throughout my school years, so I know what it feels like to be ostracized and mocked. Maybe the problem really is that friendships with men are valuable to me, so I don’t have strong emotions towards a man turning me off sexually. It’s like, “Ah ew. Oh well. He’s a bro then.”

I suppose I don’t assume sexual intentions because I’m a virgin (and unkissed and un-dated). In fact, I don’t view men as very sexual beings, probably because none of them have ever acted sexual in my presence. I’ve also never been cat-called or randomly approached or experienced any other stereotypical “guy thing” feminists complain about. Men just walk around, staring off into space or at their phones, just existing and not obstructing my life path.

I don’t mind long replies, so if you’re up for it, feel free to explain more!

 

[Lilly]

how dialed is your fashion?

I wear dresses, long to mid-thigh length, with summer sandals.

 

[StrayDog]

seems to me that for some reason or another you have had trouble deepening/maintaining female friendships. Could be something to do with them, but seeing as you are the common denominator probably has a good deal to do with how you socialize with them.

it doesn't sound like you have a lot of close female role models in regards to dating and securing a man.

while surrounding yourself with male "friends". may feel convenient, it is most likely that these are men you don't desire at all, don't have many options themselves, and are either not into you, or if they are into you are not good at making moves.

Hence you feeling a sense of betrayal when it turns out they wanted you all along.

You are surrounding. yourself with these men.

A man who knows how to make moves with women and has options will rarely spend much time with a woman that he sees as undesirable (unless their is some specific social benefit, even then he will probably only invest in the friendship to the extent of that benefit).

furthermore, most men with options aren't going to want a woman for the long term who mostly surrounds herself with male friends. It is a social liability for him.

It sounds like you are not really clocking on the radar of men who knows how to make moves with you, and again have few female role models to help you illicit more of this attention.

I could be mistaken but it sounds like you perhaps miss a certain amount of social cues. you may want to consider that perhaps you are neurodivergent to some degree (of course I am not. a doctor).

in light of all this I would suggest that you

-figure out of you are neurodivergent and if so find resources to help manage what that means socially


-get fit

-update your fashion to become significantly more alluring and fetching

-become more outgoing and expose your to a diverse range of social interactions/activities/circles

-ditch the mostly male friends social model even if feels simpler in the immediate, and challenge yourself to creating sustainable female friendships

-when you do attract some male attention be more outgoing and be willing to get some genuine dating experience. Which means risking dating guys you are not quite sure about yet and so on. The more experience you have the more tools you will have to get what you are looking for.

In short, any most advice you get on the internet is only going to be so helpful if you are not putting yourself out there in new ways. Taking. My basic assessment (please take with a grain of salt), is that you are just playing it too safe.

 

[StrayDog]

I would say about 2% of men are sexually active to that degree at any given time.

dude what? where in the world are you getting this stat from?

 

[StrayDog]

Actually I don’t like making men pay for my drink or food. If he insists, I take it as a sign that he’s really interested. If he accepts my frame of “Hey, this isn’t a date or anything, I can pay for myself”, then I know he’s not interested. Or at least isn’t husband material since my end goal is indeed marriage

this is silly. if he wants to buy you drinks let him buy you drinks. if you like him why even frame things like it isn't a date. why put up barriers to connecting with him on that level? just go on the date, have the drinks and have fun getting to know him more.

guys get hung up on this shit too. it's silly and useless. Guys, just buy her drink and get on with the date.

Stop getting hung up on these arbitrary barriers to connecting with a person.

 

[StrayDog]

I do value friendships though and have had successful friendships with men in the past—probably because they had girlfriends, wives or crushes on other women.

are you saying that the wives and girlfriends of your male friends don't view you as a threat at all? they are just free to hang out with you, no questions asked? This might mean that either these male friends don't see you as attractive at all, or that their wives/girlfriends barely see you as competition.

 

[Skills]

this is dj vu of all forums and chats when we have female posters...... It seems participation jumps..... we should have more female poster so the site can be more active..... no seriously why the guys don't have the same energy when there are dudes posting....




@Lilly dresses are fine, as i told you, none of the dudes here seduce men as women, is going to be a bunch of speculation and diagnosis and projections (could be right or wrong).... There was a good girl player called hitory or hitachi @Teevster what was her name i forgot... She may have a masf archive, we had lover girl in nexasft (but she was fucking kunta dudes like a kfc store) here is her blog, https://lifeofalovergirl.wordpress.com/ though now she has it private (she was really promiscuous though doing gangbangs and buckacki and shit... .)

check out this post they have a bunch of sources we had this discussion years ago:

Girls Chase Equivalent for women?

Girls chase is primarily for men. Have any of you discovered a site that is the “women’s equivalent”? That is, one that takes a principled, alternative perspective on dating (as a woman) and earning the lives and partners they want?

www.skilledseducer.com

this is close to girl chase equivalent:

Feminine Energy: Myths, Truths & How to Exude Your Unique Femininity

You have a powerful feminine energy deep inside of you. This energy is incredibly inspiring to men and to all people, beyond what you can imagine right now. Unfortunately, most of us do not embrace

www.thefemininewoman.com

One thing i notice SOME women that have all male friends and hang out around dude, even if hot they give a masculine vibe.... Make sure is not your vibe....

But you should be fine, if you are breathing you have a 2 legs, you will have no issue, women game is containment.....Being able to keep a dude and request commitment and progression.....

i have also some women articles from back in the days:

She's A Home wrecker! Women Slut Shaming Other Women - The Skills Method

New popular website shesahomewrecker.com engaging in slut shaming women, but the twist is that is women doing the slut shaming.

www.theskillsmethod.com

https://www.theskillsmethod.com/must-sex-toy-introduction-pocket-rocket/ (meh hatachi better)

Types of relationships - The Skills Method

The different relationships types, and were you probably stand.

www.theskillsmethod.com

Women do not necessarily have it any easier than dudes (Women series) - The Skills Method

Women series is a number of blog posts dedicated to my female followers, BUT YOU CAN also benefit from seeing things from their point of view… These are women I … Continue Reading →

www.theskillsmethod.com

Debunking the women rating system - The Skills Method

The women rating system is a debate that you see every week on forums, the information,myth, exaggerations and bullshit is all over the place. So lets start with the 2 … Continue Reading →

www.theskillsmethod.com

women's body types

Different women's body types and what the top seducers in the world like body wise in women.

www.theskillsmethod.com

alpha male

In this post I want to show you why women prefer the masculine/lover/aplha male type vs the average Joe…Let me have a girl by the name of Gwendolyn Kansen … Continue Reading →

www.theskillsmethod.com

unfortunately in my video they took the captions were i was breaking down a lot of concepts.....

 

[Lilly]

are you saying that the wives and girlfriends of your male friends don't view you as a threat at all? they are just free to hang out with you, no questions asked? This might mean that either these male friends don't see you as attractive at all, or that their wives/girlfriends barely see you as competition.

The married ones have all been happily together for decades with kids, so no, I’m not a threat at all to their bond. And if the girlfriends view me as a threat, they’ve never acted like it. They’ve no reason to see me as competition because their exclusive relationships aren’t up for grabs and I’m not interested in taken men.

 

[Lilly]

seems to me that for some reason or another you have had trouble deepening/maintaining female friendships. Could be something to do with them, but seeing as you are the common denominator probably has a good deal to do with how you socialize with them.

it doesn't sound like you have a lot of close female role models in regards to dating and securing a man.

while surrounding yourself with male "friends". may feel convenient, it is most likely that these are men you don't desire at all, don't have many options themselves, and are either not into you, or if they are into you are not good at making moves.

Hence you feeling a sense of betrayal when it turns out they wanted you all along.

You are surrounding. yourself with these men.

A man who knows how to make moves with women and has options will rarely spend much time with a woman that he sees as undesirable (unless their is some specific social benefit, even then he will probably only invest in the friendship to the extent of that benefit).

furthermore, most men with options aren't going to want a woman for the long term who mostly surrounds herself with male friends. It is a social liability for him.

It sounds like you are not really clocking on the radar of men who knows how to make moves with you, and again have few female role models to help you illicit more of this attention.

I could be mistaken but it sounds like you perhaps miss a certain amount of social cues. you may want to consider that perhaps you are neurodivergent to some degree (of course I am not. a doctor).

in light of all this I would suggest that you

-figure out of you are neurodivergent and if so find resources to help manage what that means socially


-get fit

-update your fashion to become significantly more alluring and fetching

-become more outgoing and expose your to a diverse range of social interactions/activities/circles

-ditch the mostly male friends social model even if feels simpler in the immediate, and challenge yourself to creating sustainable female friendships

-when you do attract some male attention be more outgoing and be willing to get some genuine dating experience. Which means risking dating guys you are not quite sure about yet and so on. The more experience you have the more tools you will have to get what you are looking for.

In short, any most advice you get on the internet is only going to be so helpful if you are not putting yourself out there in new ways. Taking. My basic assessment (please take with a grain of salt), is that you are just playing it too safe.

I have trouble with female friendships where the women are my age. I have great friendships with much older women. But yeah, a lot of good points here. I’ve committed to going out more (beach, gym, church) to increase my exposure to all kinds of men. Thank you!

 

[Water]

@Skills Her name was Hitori. I remember she had an extensive posting history on masf. I don’t recall learning a single useful thing from her, not saying she had nothing of value to give, I just don’t remember anything.

She was nominated, approved, and joined a private forum I was part of that no longer exists. She was kicked out within a week, one or two guys questioned why a straight woman (not actively bisexual) would be an active poster on a forum for straight men to learn how to seduce women, and she couldn’t give strong enough reasons or good enough answers to the various complaints and questions directed at her about having her on the forum or that she didn’t have anything to contribute.

I haven’t read this thread, I will later. I don’t personally have anything against female posters on here, I am curious what their motives are and what they believe they can contribute and what they believe they can gain from the forum.

Never heard of that lover girl person, that individual sounds comical.

 

[Water]

this is dj vu of all forums and chats when we have female posters...... It seems participation jumps..... we should have more female poster so the site can be more active..... no seriously why the guys don't have the same energy when there are dudes posting....

It’s a novelty, and most of the community are guys who have trouble getting females in their lives and/or don’t have a females in their lives.

Your post reminds me of a phenomenon that happened with the female seduction teacher Kezia Noble. Some of her students had the romance movie dream play in their heads that after taking training with her she would get to know the student’s real personality and fall for him and they would be together forever or so. So her hotness attracted a lot of students, even ones that didn’t sign up solely to learn from her but because they thought they would have a chance with her.

I think she is still active, although not as attractive as 10 years ago lol.

Also, to my knowledge, she’s never developed feelings for or hooked up with a single student.

Sinn was against females teaching seduction to men wanting to seduce women and gave very strong arguments for his viewpoint.

 

[Skills]

It’s a novelty, and most of the community are guys who have trouble getting females in their lives and/or don’t have a females in their lives.

Your post reminds me of a phenomenon that happened with the female seduction teacher Kezia Noble. Some of her students had the romance movie dream play in their heads that after taking training with her she would get to know the student’s real personality and fall for him and they would be together forever or so. So her hotness attracted a lot of students, even ones that didn’t sign up solely to learn from her but because they thought they would have a chance with her.

I think she is still active, although not as attractive as 10 years ago lol.

Also, to my knowledge, she’s never developed feelings for or hooked up with a single student.

Sinn was against females teaching seduction to men wanting to seduce women and gave very strong arguments for his viewpoint.

I am against female coaches as well teaching dudes even girls i dated and i taught including mrs skills useless advice... Though the little gen z girl i posted is good at fashion but even she a few times contradicts herself...

 

[Water]

@Skills Her name was Hitori. I remember she had an extensive posting history on masf. I don’t recall learning a single useful thing from her, not saying she had nothing of value to give, I just don’t remember anything.

She was nominated, approved, and joined a private forum I was part of that no longer exists. She was kicked out within a week, one or two guys questioned why a straight woman (not actively bisexual) would be an active poster on a forum for straight men to learn how to seduce women, and she couldn’t give strong enough reasons or good enough answers to the various complaints and questions directed at her about having her on the forum or that she didn’t have anything to contribute.

I haven’t read this thread, I will later. I don’t personally have anything against female posters on here, I am curious what their motives are and what they believe they can contribute and what they believe they can gain from the forum.

Never heard of that lover girl person, that individual sounds comical.

@Teevster Do you remember the thread with Hitori? The one that got her kicked from that private forum? I don’t recall any specifics. I think some of the points brought up would be interesting / relevant here.

 

[Skills]

@Skills Her name was Hitori. I remember she had an extensive posting history on masf. I don’t recall learning a single useful thing from her, not saying she had nothing of value to give, I just don’t remember anything.

She was nominated, approved, and joined a private forum I was part of that no longer exists. She was kicked out within a week, one or two guys questioned why a straight woman (not actively bisexual) would be an active poster on a forum for straight men to learn how to seduce women, and she couldn’t give strong enough reasons or good enough answers to the various complaints and questions directed at her about having her on the forum or that she didn’t have anything to contribute.

I haven’t read this thread, I will later. I don’t personally have anything against female posters on here, I am curious what their motives are and what they believe they can contribute and what they believe they can gain from the forum.

Never heard of that lover girl person, that individual sounds comical.

Every chat private group and forum suffers, dudes simp or white knight... intermediate and even some advanced alter behavior in chats and forums and yes i seen guys flexing seduction miserably and embarrassing, guys fall in love... Cluster fuck.... I also get paranoid if is one my girls... Lol... One of chase exes was in ny private chat... she didn't last 2 seconds could not take the trolling...

But i think lily is chill i just don't want any history repeating.. hitori useless... Love girl was entertaining with all the crazy stories, then we had present who got into a fight with gun and got me involved with that shit, destroy nextasf chat...

We did a female forum section on mextasf that failed to... just lol.. i do miss lovergirl she was insane..

Kesia noble used to advice wait 3: days to text back nonsense....