Proactivity said:
Estate said:
You guys aren't even in college anymore, yet are clinging to some hierarchy that no longer exists in your life. The problem is not with these guys, it's your perception of them and how you won't just LET IT GO. Especially if you are no longer in college, you can totally reinvent yourself in your later life, or work career or anything.
Good post but hierarchies will always exist and many exist well past college, I am talking Greek Life. A lot of these guys that were in frats in college still get access to hot girls well past college because they have a network to be a part of. With that said, I think we can all agree the best thing to do is to be a part of crowds that attract hot girls rather than denying their importance.
You seem to think it is just pro athletes but it isn't that, it is all about being a part of the in crowd, pro athlete or not. What I have learned from my experience with this is that I was robbing myself by not finding the in crowd and being a part of it. I will do a post later which talks about the truth that comes with guys that get hot girls and being a part of a certain crowd is at the top of the list.
Yeah, the athlete thing is just what I can identify from my OWN college. It was Rugby and GAA players who generally were seen a guys or "value" so I'd compare it to them being the big Football stars in a US college... but you're right, that's one example, hierarchies also existed in societies, different sections of the college, different faculties, etc, etc... so without the "greek" thing, I do get it.
But you're last point is right, the hierarchies exist everywhere and in the working world too... but I can read from your last post, you've clicked with the idea, of basically saying fuck the hierarchy, just be the kind of person, that the people you want... want to meet and become part of their circle.
Once you are "in", it no longer seems a big deal, it's just normal life now.
The OP's thing though is he constantly seems to see himself as the outsider and that its him against the world, and it's all the fault of these hierarchies for every problem he's got. That's just not the case. If he got to know some frat guys, maybe he'll find a few of them are cool guys, even if he's not one of the "in" crowd himself. Why doesn't he try to be more like them so they might think he's cool, if that's the sort of circle he values being part of?
I just don't get the point of these threads...
Most threads on here from newbies begin with "I want to do/get/have/learn <X>... how can I achieve that?"
At least that comes from a place where others here can offer advice as to the steps to get what he wants, then he can choose to take the advice or not.
In this case it's constantly the tone of "Well... the world has screwed me over, might as well give up... but I'm going to post about it in the hope these other guys will agree with me so I can justify never accepting that maybe there's something about ME I need to work on to get it".
Believe me, it's a hard pill to swallow when you realise some of the things you don't have or can't get are down to YOU and not something else. It's a VERY hard pill to swallow. But once you do, it actually takes the weight off... now you realise, you can actually work towards something, it's not as hopeless as blaming everyone else and nothing ever changing.