Special Girl My crush keeps telling me about her sexual life

[Atlas IV]

Well I have dedicated myself to game, it’s all I think about anyway. I want to become a great seducer and nothing else right now. So why not go this route? Why take my precious time away from what matters most in life - connections with others? I think you gotta put the effort in and make seduction your priority if you want to be the best.

Brah there's more to life than girls. Focusing on seduction and nothing else will make you miserable and a bore.

 

[Will_V]

Well I have dedicated myself to game, it’s all I think about anyway. I want to become a great seducer and nothing else right now. So why not go this route? Why take my precious time away from what matters most in life - connections with others? I think you gotta put the effort in and make seduction your priority if you want to be the best.

I don't believe in the idea of focusing on seduction when you're struggling to wake up every day and enjoy your life. In your other thread it's clear that you can't handle the inevitable rejections and obstacles, and that you're taking the reactions of girls as a judgement of your identity. This is a disastrous way to live your life and no quality girl is going to want to go near it.

If you need to feel loved and supported in life, going up to random girls and trying to get it from them is a horrible way to go about it. No girl wants the responsibility of steering the self esteem of a guy who can't steer it himself.

Fix your life and let girls be the dessert you enjoy at the end of the day.

 

[mirror]

Well I have dedicated myself to game, it’s all I think about anyway. I want to become a great seducer and nothing else right now. So why not go this route? Why take my precious time away from what matters most in life - connections with others? I think you gotta put the effort in and make seduction your priority if you want to be the best.

I lost my shit when i read this (started laughing).
that said, i do agree that it's important to find more sources of happiness than one other person can give you. Maybe have 2 sources, the seduction part and some part that gives your life more meaning? some issues you care about.
Yeah I know it's hard right now. I feel you.

 

[mirror]

we should have girls chasing us! We should be the ones becoming available and they should bed us, isn’t that the point of this site?

some steps forward, some back. that's the rhythm
and no the point of the site is learning how to dance :')
mutual seduction beats being chased or being the chaser ALWAYS.

 

[TrailBlazer]

I don't believe in the idea of focusing on seduction when you're struggling to wake up every day and enjoy your life. In your other thread it's clear that you can't handle the inevitable rejections and obstacles, and that you're taking the reactions of girls as a judgement of your identity. This is a disastrous way to live your life and no quality girl is going to want to go near it.

If you need to feel loved and supported in life, going up to random girls and trying to get it from them is a horrible way to go about it. No girl wants the responsibility of steering the self esteem of a guy who can't steer it himself.

Fix your life and let girls be the dessert you enjoy at the end of the day.

Fix my life, but again, just to get girls? How is that different from what I’m doing right now?

I understand what you mean, but please tell me where do I find the motivation to live for myself? I really don’t care about my life, I just care about getting girls.

And I’ve been in several therapies and at psychologists too, but I did it all just to look fixed and attract more girls.

I want to care about more stuff, but girls are so sweet and addictive, I can’t find any substitute that comes even close!

 

[mirror]

I want to care about more stuff, but girls are so sweet and addictive, I can’t find any substitute that comes even close!

losing my shit again, but you do know the things you care about. you cant only chase one thing and then regret it years later. Think about in 40-50 years from now, will being a great seducer be enough for you to be happy with? or would you want to be known for other things too?

 

[TrailBlazer]

losing my shit again, but you do know the things you care about. you cant only chase one thing and then regret it years later. Think about in 40-50 years from now, will being a great seducer be enough for you to be happy with? or would you want to be known for other things too?

I can do the other things when I get old and don’t have such a high sex drive. Now all I want are experiences with as many types of girls as possible. Exploring life. Traveling to different places to approach. Getting into interesting situations. That’s how I define a fun life for me.

I would like to have some hobbies or a mission for myself too, to not be so needy around girls. But again, how do I realise that I’m important enough to do things for myself? All I do in life is to get girls. Doing things for myself feels like a major waste of time when I could be approaching instead.

 

[Ratata]

Well I have dedicated myself to game, it’s all I think about anyway. I want to become a great seducer and nothing else right now. So why not go this route? Why take my precious time away from what matters most in life - connections with others? I think you gotta put the effort in and make seduction your priority if you want to be the best.

So, you want to become a great seducer? Well, would a great seducer simp and worry about this one girl for years? Or would he make sure to always let himself be enthused by new women, and go out of his way to meet as many as possible, while laughing and having a merry good time with them?

Why not go what route? What route are you on anyway? Are you meeting tons of new women every week? Are you escalating despite not getting signals? Would you rather wait for a signal instead of taking a risk?

Do you know what separated nobility from plebs back in the day? The privilege of going first into battle. In other words, your privilege, if one can call it that, was to be the one who would probably die first. But the payoff? That you get to be a leader, and have a mansion full of servants in peace time. So, who do you want to be? The seducer or the peasant?

 

[Will_V]

Fix my life, but again, just to get girls? How is that different from what I’m doing right now?

No, not just to get girls. To be satisfied with who you are.

I understand what you mean, but please tell me where do I find the motivation to live for myself? I really don’t care about my life, I just care about getting girls.

And I’ve been in several therapies and at psychologists too, but I did it all just to look fixed and attract more girls.

I want to care about more stuff, but girls are so sweet and addictive, I can’t find any substitute that comes even close!

I'm not a therapist but I can tell you one thing for sure, girls are not the solution for this.

Seems like girls are your drug, since when was drugs the solution for anything? They will only mask the problem, for a time, and then leave you worse than when you started.

I don't know what else to tell you, you seem to be pretty aware of the state of your life but somehow you are not taking action to fix it. I think the sort of help you need is beyond the capabilities of this forum.

 

[mirror]

I can do the other things when I get old and don’t have such a high sex drive.

Losing my shit again

 

[Atlas IV]

I can do the other things when I get old and don’t have such a high sex drive. Now all I want are experiences with as many types of girls as possible. Exploring life. Traveling to different places to approach. Getting into interesting situations. That’s how I define a fun life for me.

I would like to have some hobbies or a mission for myself too, to not be so needy around girls. But again, how do I realise that I’m important enough to do things for myself? All I do in life is to get girls. Doing things for myself feels like a major waste of time when I could be approaching instead.

I think I understand how you're feeling now. I've been there. You see all these hot girls around you all the time and you just really really want to fuck them, and it's frustrating and you can't think of anything else.

That itch won't go away until either you achieve abundance or you give up, so it is good that you're focusing on seduction in order to get there. You're young and you've got time ahead.

Just be aware that it will burn you out. What I have learned is that the stretches of my life where I was focused obsessively on daygame (as in making it the sole focus of my life) were not the times that I was happiest, and also paradoxically not when I got the best results.

My best results came when I started focusing on other things and living a more fulfilled life overall.

Also, if you're jacking off to porn, quit that shit now.

 

[TrailBlazer]

I think the sort of help you need is beyond the capabilities of this forum.

Yes but dude, any help I seek out will be again, just to look fixed and get girls. From a small part of my brain I do want to try living for myself, but the drug is just so sweet.. and not even that bad for me! Maybe I need drug addiction therapy:/ but again, I’d be doing it just to not be addicted and needy and get more girls! What do I do…

 

[TrailBlazer]

I think I understand how you're feeling now. I've been there. You see all these hot girls around you all the time and you just really really want to fuck them, and it's frustrating and you can't think of anything else.

That itch won't go away until either you achieve abundance or you give up, so it is good that you're focusing on seduction in order to get there. You're young and you've got time ahead.

Just be aware that it will burn you out. What I have learned is that the stretches of my life where I was focused obsessively on daygame (as in making it the sole focus of my life) were not the times that I was happiest, and also paradoxically not when I got the best results.

My best results came when I started focusing on other things and living a more fulfilled life overall.

Also, if you're jacking off to porn, quit that shit now.

This was the best reply for me so far, thank you. I feel like you understand the dedication I have. And to build a balanced life as a counter measure against burnout sounds reasonable. I will try it!

I’ve had one burnout when I was doing daygame every day for months too, but it was because I was so emotionally attached to every single approach. Maybe a balanced life will help with this, although I don’t think I’ll suddenly think about the gym or my pet more than some amazing girl I lost!

 

[Atlas IV]

I’ve had one burnout when I was doing daygame every day for months too, but it was because I was so emotionally attached to every single approach. Maybe a balanced life will help with this, although I don’t think I’ll suddenly think about the gym or my pet more than some amazing girl I lost!

The best way to avoid emotional attachment in game is to think about every failure as a building block that makes you into a better seducer.

And the good thing about screwing things up with an amazing girl is that you'll never make that same mistake again, so it becomes a strong building block (assuming you have done a proper autopsy and are clear about why you screwed it up).

 

[POB]

@TrailBlazer

When you live an interesting life with lots of cool stuff going on at the same time, getting girls is almost an afterthough.
THAT'S when you really become attractive!

Why?

Because even though you are another dude that tries to get close to them, they can sense you don't give a shit if you get them or not.
Your amazing life is BIGGER than them, and it kinda of pisses them off....but is super hot at the same time.
That twitch in the corner of your eye is never there for them, but they wish it was...and they'll fight for it.

Go get more experiences under your belt, not only with women, but with life in general.
Go do shit that really makes you happy!

Stop worrying about what they will think of it
You are doing it for you, and you alone.
Fuck the rest of the world.
Soon you'll notice how women will naturally start to gravitate towards that energy.

 

[TrailBlazer]

@TrailBlazer

When you live an interesting life with lots of cool stuff going on at the same time, getting girls is almost an afterthough.
THAT'S when you really become attractive!

Why?

Because even though you are another dude that tries to get close to them, they can sense you don't give a shit if you get them or not.
Your amazing life is BIGGER than them, and it kinda of pisses them off....but is super hot at the same time.
That twitch in the corner of your eye is never there for them, but they wish it was...and they'll fight for it.

Go get more experiences under your belt, not only with women, but with life in general.
Go do shit that really makes you happy!

Stop worrying about what they will think of it
You are doing it for you, and you alone.
Fuck the rest of the world.
Soon you'll notice how women will naturally start to gravitate towards that energy.

And how do you avoid the resentment that comes with building a whole life just to get girls?

I tried this in the past. I traveled, went to events, tried hobbies… just to tell girls that I did these things. But it all cost too much time and money, I could have just lied about these experiences.

And about living for yourself… I don’t think it really compares to the joy of getting girls. Or for you, if you were sexually frustrated, would any activity be more attractive than sex?

 

[topcat]

I just care about getting girls

Ask yourself why? Why do you want girls so bad? What do you think they'll do for you? What you actually want is rooted in this.

 

[TrailBlazer]

Ask yourself why? Why do you want girls so bad? What do you think they'll do for you? What you actually want is rooted in this.

There is a deeper layer to this, but most importantly: it’s written in our DNA! The urge to procreate is the strongest one we have. The biggest goal of our organism is to survive and make babies. So of course I feel the motivation to do that.

The deeper layer is of course childhood trauma and an unloving mother. I’ve been to 3 long term therapies for this, and I always managed to convince the therapists that having a girlfriend is what would help me the most. I need a repairing relationship full of love and validation, so that I have something to build that self love on. I need a proof of my value. Right now I only have proof of my worthlessness (abuse, bullying, etc). I don’t see myself as important. So I need someone to show me that I matter too. Otherwise I don’t know how to believe that!

 

[mirror]

So I need someone to show me that I matter too. Otherwise I don’t know how to believe that!

I feel speechless. Something just doesnt read genuine here... wonder what
That said. Okay, take a step back. Breathe in, exist, breathe out, exist.
Do this 1000 of times and then lets continue talking here.

 

[TrailBlazer]

I feel speechless. Something just doesnt read genuine here... wonder what
That said. Okay, take a step back. Breathe in, exist, breathe out, exist.
Do this 1000 of times and then lets continue talking here.

I’m not triggered while writing this. It’s been proven that you need at least some proof of being lovable in order to have something to build your own self love on.

Many people chase girls and validation, you’re shocked from what I write but I’m not that special. People just don’t talk about it as openly as I do. Or they pretend they live for something else, but deep down they just want the girls too.