Again I take the role of the "tearer offer" of band aids: I think this woman is a lost cause and that you should GFTOW.
With that said, I think it's commendable that you actually tried and that you did something. Moreover, I don't think what you did was fruitless. But it mostly comes down to one thing: Balls (well, technically they come in pairs, but I digress). So yes, you were that bad... But I wouldn't cry over it. In fact, I would be proud, because you did what you could given the circumstances. The rest is just about mustering the courage to go through with it and face all possible consequences - which I don't think you're ready for, because I think you're actually afraid of rejection.
Btw. I can highly recommend reading Eckhart Tolle here. He would tell you to stop worrying about your past. Except for what you learned from it, it doesn't define you. Moreover, you shouldn't worry about the future either; certainly not that future which you have no control over. Instead focus on what you do have control over, and make your plans from there. Then release all worries, or lamentations, or feelings of lack or loss about all the other things that you cannot really do anything about, and that doesn't actually serve you at this point in time.
So you were Ghengis Kahn in your previous life... Well, how does that help you now? It probably doesn't. Except if you can utilize some of that knowledge of how to be a great seducer. But it doesn't look like you can though it seems to both irk you, and cause doubt in others, so I wouldn't even worry about it at all. I'd just treat it as something that is outside of your control at this point in time, and instead prepare for what you can do. And there are a great deal of things that you can do!
So, listen. I've kissed many women that weren't into it to begin with, and some even looked the other way before I acted. They all did so because they were waiting for me to take action. Because they are girls and I'm the man. And when I took action, they either got into it, or rejected me rightly. There are only two outcomes if you act, but there is only one if you don't do anything. So, if you wait or pussy out, the only one rejecting anyone is ... YOU. By not acting, you're essentially rejecting yourself.
Know then, that rejecting yourself is the worst kind of self-cuckery and cowardice that exists out there. I don't blame you for it. After all, for me it is a boon. By rejecting yourself, you simply represent yet another loser who pose no threat to me, no competition for other girls. And honestly, I love it when my would-be competitors chicken out before even trying, because then it makes the game so much easier for me... (Sorry. But sometimes getting pissed off is a great motivator lol.)
Ok, so let's change gears for a second. Allow me to tell you something about nobility.
You may think it was all roses to be noble or even royal, and that they probably didn't deserve their wealth. Well, I don't think you'd envy the nobility's number one privilege in war, since ancient times: To lead the army into to battle.
Take a moment to really suck that in. What do you think it means?
Well, it means being the first to attack the other army... It means you're the first guy to dive into their pointy spears and swords. That ... is your privilege! So, the privilege is essentially to die first, or be victorious. How brave... Yet, this sacrifice was needed for the nobles to even have the privilege of leading, much less having a title.
If you want more on this topic, please read the book Skin In The Game by Nassim Taleb. Only those with skin in the game deserve glory. Only those who lead other men into battle deserve a noble title, and all the finery that goes with it in times of peace. And only those who kiss the girl, deserve to be kissed back - at the risk of being rejected. Well, at least you won't die a glorious death, but if you actually try to kiss her, all us in here, even if you are rejected, will rejoice and think that your balls are really big.