Protean's First Forty

Protean

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Nov 18, 2019
Messages
115
This day game journal will be a record of the first 40 approaches that I do to lay down the foundation of a long, successful career in pickup. AA has been a road block for me for years and this is how I'll learn to manage and defeat it.

Some background on me. I'm 5'10, black and have a slim build. I'd rate myself as a beginner in the world of seduction, but I'm not totally inexperienced with 3 lays and couple other close calls to my name. While I do enjoy sex, unbridled hedonism isn't what drives me. It isn't to have a show stopper girlfriend, or brag to my friends about how much I get laid either. I just want two things: 1.) absolute abundance and 2.) never having the feeling of watching a woman you're dying to talk to pass you by without doing anything. I don't have the former and I'm tired of feeling the latter so let's go.

The goal is to get to 40 approaches by 02/29/20. If I don't make it it, I will continue to update this thread until I do.
 

Protean

Space Monkey
space monkey
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Messages
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To reach my goal I'll need to do 2-3 approaches a day (can only approach on weekdays). Today I did 2.

Approach #1 I posted here

Getting the next approach was much more difficult. I was able to blitz into the first approach as I had been mentally rearing myself to go all weekend for it. However once I sat through a class and spent a few hours studying all that momentum was gone. Had to build it back up again.

In the hour I set aside to get two approaches done, I went back to being a nervous wreck.

I'd throw a quick compliment at girls then exit the interaction to try get myself in rhythm, but man that does not work. Not doing that anymore, at least to girls that I'm genuinely interested in.

For instance, I complimented this absolute dime on her shoes, and she took it very well. I'm sure I could've gotten her number if went in there with the mind to properly approach. Never again...

I did manage to steel myself myself for a second approach. I was feeling down about pussyfooting things with the last aforementioned girl I just complimented and walked away from when I spotted another very attractive woman sitting a lounge area at my school. I sat at an adjacent desk then asked her to watch my stuff while I went to the bathroom. I genuinely had to go (really haha) and I planned on chatting her up when I returned.

Naturally, she then asks me to watch her things as she goes to the bathroom so I have to wait for her to come back. When she does, I get into some light conversation with her before saying I should let her get back to her work. I internally cringed at just letting the conversation end without doing something, so I resolved to at least ask her out before I left.

I must have sat there for about 10 minutes pretending to work until I finally packed up and asked her out on my way out.

She respectfully decline citing she getting over some trauma and wasn't ready to date. Was still another victory for me over my AA, and she seemed very happy that I found her attractive so it's all good. The only thing that annoyed me was being noticeably nervous which didn't help my chances. Need to tighten that up.

All in all a solid start, but just the first step.

Things to Improve:
  • Don't half ass approaches. When you walk up to a girl it's showtime
  • Calm your nerves when approaching. Don't tank your value by being noticeably nervous
  • Just approach. Rejection is not nearly as bad as AA makes it seem and any anxiety melts away when you're out there making things happen.

38 More Approaches
 
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Protean

Space Monkey
space monkey
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115
This class is boring as fuck. Figured I'd leave a mid day update

Two approaches so far. One away from my goal of three but I may redo the original one since it was so short.

Set an hour before this current class to go out and do approaches. The first approach was wearing a mustard top that I liked, but on the approach I saw her face and was turned off. Still went through with the opener but she had to turn off a minute later an left. Didn't even bother asking her out.

Then spent the next 40 minutes or so walking around campus. I was telling myself that the girls I was fixing to approach were either not my type or too hot for me. I wasn't really consciously thinking this but deep down that's why I was avoiding a lot of would be approaches.

I've gotta stomp out those mindsets. On the first point I NEED the reps. I have very little experience and need all the reference points I can get. On the second point I just need to approach hot girls. Nothing else will work. Once I see there no different from the girls I find more attainable I'll be in good shape for the future.

The second girl I approached was exactly my type an didn't intimidate me so I approached:

Me: Hey I saw you walking there and I just had to say I really like you glasses, I'm Protean.

Her: Thanks I'm [Name]

She had a really interesting name so I made a cheeky pun with it that she took well.

Me: So [Name] what are you up to today?

Her: Oh I'm just heading home from my classes.

Me: How many classes did you have? One? Two?

Her: I had three classes.

Me: Man [Name] you should have let me keep going! I was about to be right.

Her: [Laughs]

As usual right before we were about to split ways I asked if she was single. She said she wasn't though and I let her go.

Today my AA was far less severe. It slowed be down only a little bit which I'm really happy about. One hack I've been using --and this may sound a little cringy-- is tell myself I'm Tommy Shelby, the leading character of the show Peaky Blinders.

He's got tight fundamentals and excellent frame control so stepping into that roll has reduced my nervousness on approach.

Anyways looking to get one or more done after this class. It can't pass by soon enough.

36 More Approaches
 

Protean

Space Monkey
space monkey
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115
Rough day no approaches.

One could argue I had an excuse: I had an important test today, and my mind was fried after hitting the books. Yeah it wasn’t my fault right?

Wrong. Dead wrong.

One thing I’ve always been is incredibly self aware. It stems from being incredibly self critical -almost to the point of self hatred- from the time I was a boy. So I know that despite my long day and mental fatigue I fucked today up.

Six times I saw an attractive woman and prepared myself to approach and six times I overthought things.

Six fucking times.

Make no mistake this is unacceptable. Prior to this goal I set out for myself in this journal it wouldn’t have been a big deal. But now that this is a goal and focus of mine I cannot allow inaction to become a habit.

But enough complaining here’s what I’ll do tonight so that this never happens again:
  • Meditate before going out to approach. I already meditate in the morning, but as the day goes on and I get mentally fatigued it becomes harder to shut down my inner monologue.
  • Become more of an asshole. I don’t mean becoming a Scrooge to society, but rather stop allowing myself to be influenced by those around me. Thus far the fear of judgement has made me shrink from opportunities, act against my own interest to be accommodating, and more or less act in line with what is deemed “normal” social behavior. But I’m not seeking normalcy here. Becoming more of an asshole will help me rebel from that.
  • Do uncomfortable approaches. I’ve only gone into this picking off girls that I felt were “in my league” or where there wouldn’t be too many witnesses should I get rejected. Fuck that. The only way I’ll grow is if I really push the boundaries
So yeah that’s it. Looks like this journal will be about more than the approaches, but finally correcting my mindsets for success in game (and life in general).

I will climb this mountain guys. I will

36 more approaches
 

Protean

Space Monkey
space monkey
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Messages
115
Quick intraday update,

Looking back on my last post it was pretty dramatic, but I was pissed. I read the two articles below to start asshole transformation
  1. How to Be an Asshole - and Become Adored By Women
  2. The Genuine Man Part 1: The Arogant Man
Both articles were excellent and I highly recommend them. I also watched some videos of @Tony D doing daygame online which also helped me see what behaviors I was aspiring for.

Anyways fast forward to a few minutes ago. I was walking to the library from my first class when I passed by a girl who's exactly my type. She was going the opposite way but I quickly turned around to catch up to her. I get close for a few steps then pre-open her by tapping her on the upper arm

Me: Hey I saw you walking there, and I just had to come tell you, you have a stunning figure. I'm Bo

Her: Thank you! I'm [Name]

I proceed to make some light conversation here. I knew from earlier approaches not to get stuck in small talk, so I limited it to one small talk question before making the vibe more interesting/playful.

Me: So where are you headed [name].

Her: I'm just going to English.

Me: English you say? What's that like?

She talks about how its a hybrid class, but that it has a surprising amount of work.

Me: So besides grinding away in English, what do you like to do [name]?

Her: Oh I like going the the gym, watching Hulu and the like

Me: Ok then tell me [name] what's you're guilty pleasure on there?

We fun banter about her liking the Bachelor. She split off to go to class but I call her back to ask if she's single.

Me: Wait, [name] come over here. (She walks over) Are you single?

Her: Yeah I am.

Me: Then we should definitely hang out some time. What's your number.

I think I fumbled the ending here a bit. My voice betrayed some nervousness which even surprised me as I had zero trepidation about throughout the whole interaction, or even before the approach. Still I got her number. I'll text her later in the day and try to set something up for tomorrow afternoon.

Good start for today but I want to get at least 4 more approaches done. Anyways back to the academic grind for now.

35 Approaches Left
 
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Protean

Space Monkey
space monkey
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Messages
115
Ended up not doing anymore approaches today. Didn’t have as much time to approach and what few opportunities I did have I hesitated enough to let them slip away. It’s annoying, but I’m improving.

I think a problem I still have is thinking things over too much pre approach. In my one approach, I saw the girls and boom that was it. I took action.

But during the approaches I miss I over think things.

Luckily the fix is simple: Cut out the time between seeing a girl and moving to approach her. I can think of an approach as I’m walking up to her.

As for the earlier chick I sent an ice breaker text and haven’t hear back yet. Shame. She’s missing out.

Anyways tomorrow will be an interesting day. I still feel like I’m not pushing things full tilt. I’ve done 5 out of the 15 approaches I need to do to be in pace for my goal. So 10 approaches are needed tomorrow. I’ll go all out for it.
 

Protean

Space Monkey
space monkey
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Nov 18, 2019
Messages
115
No way I'll get to 10 approaches by the end of the day. I underestimated how much lower campus foot traffic is now compared to other days of the week. I'm still going where the girls are however: The library.

Went to the main campus library on campus. It's newly renovated and super fucking nice. I spot a really cute girl sitting down in one of our lounge chairs and occupy the seat next to her.

I let her observe me as I did some work for a minute. I'd love to say it was by design, but really I was just nervous as all hell. Really need to work on this.

Luckily she didn't move and I opened her indirectly:

Me: (Nudges her arm to get her attention) What's keeping you here on a Friday afternoon.

She laughs and explains that she's working on an assignment and a speech she's giving later to the campus's Young Democrats club. I deep dive her on this for a bit, then took the risk of talking politics to her.

I wasn't dumb enough to make in a ideological battle, but simply invited her to give her opinions of the candidates and who she thought would win on the Democratic side. Smart girl, but pretty wishy washy with her predictions so I teased her for it.

Later on in the conversation she mentioned not liking drama, which I laughed citing that all girls liked drama. She then admitted liking drama when it doesn't involve her. In a moment of quick wit I looped it back to the Democratic Primaries, joking that was the only reason she watched, and she quite enjoyed that.

At this point I had built up a lot of momentum in the library so I asked her to company me to a near by Starbucks which she agreed, despite nursing her own coffee already.

Not much more to talk about for the insta-date really to be honest.

The conversation turned to travel and how she was going to do study abroad in London, a city I'm familiar with, so we talked that.

But again I feel like I was coming across as a bit too friendly guys.

We did touch on one sexual thread where she complained about her roommate bringing guys back, and how one dude accidentally opened her door instead of her roommate's. I followed that up with a story of how I'd done that myself (a true story actually) and not to be too hard on the guy which she took well.

At the end of the insta-date she had to leave to deliver her speech, and I grabbed her number. There might be some potential, but we'll see.

As a last note, this is another experience where I tend to have a lot of success through indirect game. All my lays (all 3 lol) have come from social circle or indirect. I'm tempted to switch to that style of opening exclusively, but I feel like that would be dodging the problem of my AA. I've been doing most approaches directly and will continue to do so for this journal.

34 more Approaches
 

Protean

Space Monkey
space monkey
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Messages
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Didn't end up having any other substantial interactions yesterday. No other library girls hooked and I wasn't about to mass approach for obvious reasons.

Looking back on this week I did 6 Approaches where:
  • 5 Hooked (including 1 insta-date)
  • 2 Gave me their numbers
  • 1 Of the numbers texted me back
While 6 approaches is far cry from the 15 I was aiming for it's still progress which I'm happy with. In one week of taking action I've learned more than I have in 5 years of reading and lurking. Not bad.

Next week I'm aiming for at least 10 approaches and will bump that up to 15 the following week.

Game wise, I'm going to be focusing on the hook phase more. Essentially my strategy involves approaching girls direct as they go about their days on campus. This means I don't have a lot of time to make a good impression and get her number. Getting these girls to hook harder will have more of them willingly give me their contact info and text me back when I reach out.

Another issue I'm dealing with is AA. While it's no where near as crippling as it was previously, I'm hesitating to approach girls I really like.

Lastly I haven't been good at improving my asshole vibe with girls or people in general. I'm more defiant internally, but I'm not expressing it. I'll set some small goals on this front to force myself to act out.

Here's the action I'm planning to take:
  1. Implement the 3 second rule for approaches. Any girl I'm really looking at must be approached within 3 seconds
  2. Throw in some speaker-centered pre-openers to (read about them in this article by @Teevster ) take the edge off of my direct approaches when necessary
  3. Build more intrigue by using baiting after the approach to emotionally stimulate girls fast
#1 will help me reach my approach targets and limit the effects of AA while #2 and #3 address tweaks I need to make on my approach.

If anyone has any tips I'm all ears

Can't wait for Monday.
 

Protean

Space Monkey
space monkey
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Nov 18, 2019
Messages
115
Super hectic week

Lots of stress from school with some summer internship interviews to boot. Had one this morning that went pretty well so hopeful that blossoms into nice gig for me.

As far as cold approaches are concerned it's been pretty anemic. I've just been super stressed with the chaos of the week and I've let far too many opportunities to approach pass me by. Heck I almost cracked mentally earlier in the week and posted in frustration. Many guys on that thread gave me some good advice and pointed me to some resources that have put me on the path towards healthier mindsets for me. Thanks to all who contributed.

It hasn't been all barren on the female front however. I flirted with some chicks at a campus career fair yesterday. Pretty short interactions for the most part but it showed me the value of getting social momentum. Socializing on high momentum is totally different. I need to find a way to there consistently.

Today I've only had time for one approach on this gorgeous Iranian foreign exchange student. She walked past me and I continued four or five paces before turning around to approach. It would have been terrible if I just let her go.

I can't recall the conversation word for word but I'm proud that I A.) turned around to approach, B.) persisted after a shaky opener (I stumbled over my words and she declined to take my hand when I offered it) and C.) turned her from turned off to hooked.

The only thing I wish I did was ask for her number. I don't think she would have given it to me, but what do I know? I'm still a scrub in this game so my predictions won't be accurate anyways.

As a whole I would say my struggle now isn't with the dealing with the fear to approach, but putting too much pressure to preform when it's time to approach. I'm also only approaching girls who I'm very very attracted to which means that I don't get as many reference points and that the pressure is even greater. I should just talk to more girls.
 

Protean

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Nov 18, 2019
Messages
115
Looking back on last week my approach count was pretty lackluster. I did have a lot going on but there were shots with girls to approach that I passed on for one reason or another. Despite the disappointing approach output, mentally I don't know if I've felt this good ever. Yes really.

This forum got me onto CBT which I'd previously heard of, but never really explored. Self regulating my thoughts has dramatically improved my mood and alleviated many of the though patterns that I spoke about in this thread. I finally feel comfortable in my own skin. Pick up and self improvement are nowt about getting the things that I want, not making up for some inherent deficiencies in my worth.

I also got into TRE thanks to @Carousel I've gone through the routine below and have seen huge decreases in my bodily tension and anxiety as whole:


Game wise I've been going through the old NextASF archives which are a goldmine. Glad a lot of the guys from over there are apart of this community as well. Most notably @Bacchus 's stuff on there is just really good. His content is not only very informative, but it gives me a goal to shoot for. I will get as good as him. Mark my words.

Lastly, I've meditated and figured out where the remaining anxiety to approach comes from: other people seeing me. I've been making approaches hoping and praying those around me don't see me fail.

And that's pretty stupid.

I've since bathed my brain in posts from here. I just want to get the message through my skull that nobody really thinks of me, people won't really care that I screwed up on an approach, and that choosing to adjust my choices to the whims of the thoughts of people around me is just silly. If I died right now none of those strangers would come to my funeral and thank me for not making them uncomfortable by going after what I want lol.

The goal for this week is at least 10 approaches again. Only did 3 approaches all of last week. That's not going to get it done. I want to get good. I really do. Time to put in the work to make that happen

- Protean
 

Carousel

Tribal Elder
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Nov 11, 2019
Messages
576
It is really cool to hear that the therapy stack is working so well for you! Everybody else here who struggles with AA or general anxiety/depression should take notice, and more importantly, take action.
 

Glow

Tribal Elder
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Protean

Space Monkey
space monkey
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Messages
115
Sup Gents,

Haven't really been updating this thread so I'll do so real quick.

All in all this week I've only done a couple of approaches. A combination of school work, some AA and sleep deprivation (going through a bout of insomnia) have kept that number as low as it is.

I'm still pushing through though and just finished a different kind of approach.

A quick preface first. I'd say my personality style is very smooth and low key. Thus I tend to do best when going indirect. Naturally this conflicts with most of my approaches as their done in between classes. I don't have time to go indirect, the girl could arrive at her destination at any time.

So this approach took place at the library.

At my school's biggest library, there's a wing dedicated to desks similar to these ones:
8ebf73d3ce32a1c61eba969f91455785.jpg


Pretty much screams don't bother me I'm studying right lol

But of course this pretty Latina sits down to the desk to my left to begin working. I was dying to approach, but I was nervous. It's pretty quite in this area so everyone would hear me spitting game. That doesn't bother me so much these days but I do have to be careful. This is a great study spot and I'd hate to burn it down.

Finally after much deliberation and nervousness, I just imagined being old after living a life of not taking risks and playing it safe. That fear pushed me to make a play. So I roll back in my chair while and slowly turn my head towards her. She's taking notes with a bunch of different color pens so I open with that.

Me: (Inquisitive but playful tone of voice) Does using all those colors help you remember more?
Her: (Laughs) I don't know I just using them
Me: (Smiles) No worries, I was just giving you a hard time. I'm Protean.

And we're off to the races :)

We make idle chit chat and I quickly find out she's studying for her MCAT with plans on becoming a doctor. After bit of back and forth I make this move.

Me: Hey we're being a bit loud let's head over somewhere else. (Said as I'm turning my chair to leave)
Her: Hmm I dunno. (Clearly hesitant)
Me: It's cool just for 5 minutes (Gets up and starts walking)
Her: (Gets up and follows me)

I felt like a baller haha. Guys leading works. If you lead her and she likes you (I could tell she hooked). She will follow.

Anyways, we move to a different area of the floor and we chat some more. I deep dived her on some hobbies and on auto-pilot I said I enjoyed "painting and sketching" LMAO. It was a total accident but from that point I had to roll with it. Luckily I knew enough about art to B.S. my way through that portion, but yeah. Can't let that happen again.

Anyways she ejects after a 10 minute conversation and I agreed it was time to get back to work. Would have gone for her number on a high note but I left my phone on my desk smh.

I'll probably go for her number right before I leave and see what comes of it.

Key lessons for me in this interaction are as follows:
  • Approach anxiety is all in my head. When I open girls it goes from a pretty intense anxiety to literally nothing. Even if I'm blown out. I need just learn not to listen to it and push through.
  • Move girls. Leading works guys. If she likes you she'll follow.
  • I tend to run my conversations on auto-pilot (i.e. I'm very off the cuff and sentences flow with little thought beforehand) but while I think this is a strength, I have to be careful. Don't just blurt our random shit.
29 More Approaches
 

Protean

Space Monkey
space monkey
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Nov 18, 2019
Messages
115
Bittersweet day today guys.

Let's start with the positive. Today was my best day out approaching yet. I did a total of 4 approaches, when I can normally muster up one or 2. The first one I talked about in the previous post. Of the other three only one was as substantial (The other 2 were very short).

Here's the breakthrough I made: I can open directly with an indirect vibe

What I mean by that is previously when I tried to do direct openers, I would come in more high energy, then slink back to my default lower energy vibe. I really did not like doing this. It felt so incongruent to me. But I assumed that high energy was the only way to deliver direct openers. That created extra pressure for me to preform on top of whatever AA I had in the moment.

Now I do things differently.

I simply open direct in my more natural, laid back vibe. It's seems to be working, but I'll field test it more just to be sure.

An example is how I opened up the last girl of the day. She was walking ahead of me so I simply walked slightly ahead of her for a few beats so she could notice my presence. Then I slowly turned, threw on a warm smile and said

Hey. I really like your jeans. The distressed look just works for you. I'm Protean.

No grand show or over the top enthusiasm, but there is a genuine tone and warmth to my voice. In theory it gives me the benefits of normal direct openers without being too polarizing. Plus if I get ignored or blown out, it doesn't look that bad to any other girls who may have seen haha. Again I'll test this out more to see if my thoughts hold water.

On the negative side I'm still far too conservative when it comes to taking risks and making plays. I left the girl who I spoke to in the library from the previous post without asking for her number. She even said bye to me as I was leaving and I still didn't pull the trigger. Looking back at it now later in the day I'm so annoyed with myself. I should have asked, but part of me was afraid she'd say no. I rationalized that asking wouldn't have been worth it.

That wasn't the only time I didn't do everything I could to win. I bowed out of one approach far too early because the girl said she was going to the bathroom. Like really? I couldn't try to get her to wait 5 minutes to talk with me and grab her number?

There was another girl I saw who I was about but she was too far behind me so I didn't turn around and go for it. Really?

And lastly, even though I've figured out a decent approach method for myself, I still can't do street stops on girls who are walking the opposite direction.

What it boils down to is this: I need to be able to push forward in situations where I'm pushing my comfort zones. My whole brain and body may be screaming for me to play it safe, but I need to push on anyways. If I don't my growth will be far slower than what it can be.

I also need to play to fucking win. I'm still kicking myself over that other girl. I pretty much find reasons to reject myself and I need to stop.

26 More Approaches
 

Protean

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Nov 18, 2019
Messages
115
Quick post,

Seems I really made some strides as far as my AA goes. This morning walking to my classes I did three approaches with little to no nervousness beforehand. It's awesome how I've been able to get to this level.

I plan on doing more to really solidify my gains but I'm seeing the next sticking point already: I'm not asking girls for their contact information.

The first girl I could sense didn't really hook and was just engaging in light conversation

The second interaction ended when pretty fast as she had to walk the other way. However, I could have walked with her.

The third girl was the cute sorority chick. Even though, I don't really like sorority girls (blondes don't really do much for me). She had a banging ass and I opened her. We had a decent conversation about partying and drinking. I was even setting some us frames by having her imagine a night when we were setting up to hit the town. But in the back of my mind I still wasn't sure if she hooked so I ejected without asking for the number.

I'm opening direct with the more laid back vibe from my previous post, so these girls know I have some sexual interest in them. Still I think it's time to start assuming attraction like Chase says.

Right now I'm looking for attraction when my eyes aren't trained enough to find it. I'm just going to start assuming all the girls I approach want to fuck me regardless of what signals I think I'm reading (to a point guys lol)

23 More Approaches
 

Protean

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Nov 18, 2019
Messages
115
Another intraday update guys.

I'm on fire.

4 more approaches. 4 more approaches.

I'm so happy too because there's been a paradigm shift. It's not longer a big deal to me. I just come up as the cool laid back guy and see if girls bite. If they do great! If not, whatever.

Approach #1
I had gotten to get some food on campus and was looking for a place to sit. Out of the corner of my eye I spot this cute brunnete with glasses (something I really like on chicks). I sit on the table adjacent to her and prepare my meal. After a minute or two I open her.

Me: Quite the meal. (She only had a muffin and a bottle of milk lol)
Her: Oh yeah I'm not that hungry and it's Lent.
Me: No worries, I'm just joking around. I'm Protean.
Her: I'm [Name]

I start asking her what she's up to and when she hooks I invite her to come sit with me which she readily agrees to. This girl is into a lot. She's studying premed, in marching bad, and is getting a history minor. After some banter and conversation I let the conversation die down for a sec. She mentions having to leave and I ask if she's single. She is and I get the number. I was very laid back and chill throughout. I'm finding this lower energy style of game to be very fun and easy for me to pull of congruently.

Approach #2
As I leave the main foot court on campus I spot this cute black haired chick walking by. A Latina. Firm ass. I start heading over.

She enters the building I just left so I go back in. She's texting but whatever. I open her

Me: Hey. (Pause for her to look up and notice me) I saw you walking there and had to come say I love your top. The pattern, the color. You pull it off well.
Her: Thanks!
Me: I'm Protean.
Her: [Name]

I walk with her and ask her what she's up to. She says she's looking for the second floor of the building we're on for a conference. Like the cheeky bastard I am I say all she has to do is find an elevator or some stairs and she's set (said it a pretty matter-of-fact and sarcastic tone). She laughs and agrees. I deep dive her on her major and why she's going into the field for a couple minutes until she finds the elevator. She shakes my hand saying it was nice meeting me but I clasp it (gently lol) and ask if she's single. She get a huge grin and says she isn't so Iet her go. Can't win 'em all.

Approach #3
I approach this cute Asian chick (another weakness of mine) and tell her I really like her top. She's in a hurry though and I kinda have to work to get her attention. We go back and forth once and she reveals she's late for a class. I just let her go at that point. Maybe I could've convinced her to stay and talk but it didn't feel right.

Approach #4
At this point, I'm warmed up. I'm heated. I felt like I could continue to approach all day but I did have some stuff to finish up. I walk into the main library on campus and of course, I see this really cute chick sitting on one of the couches in the main entry way. I'm really liking the look of this gal. Slim but not too skinny (really skinny petite girls are a NOT my type at all), pretty face, a cute pair of eyeglasses. I thought about walking on, but then I was like fuck that. I'm playing to win now. So I head over.

I sit on the couch just behind where she's sitting (they are two person couches so I'm behind her on the opposite side). My brain quickly thinks up of a smooth way to open. One thing I've found to be effective is to ask for some investment from some girls before seriously approaching. Normally what I do is ask for them to watch my stuff while I run to the bathroom. Just after getting their attention I begin my request "notice" their appearance, then compliment them, before continuing.

In this instance the bathroom was a stone throw away and it didn't feel right to use that excuse so I made up something about forgetting something at the food court (which is a short walk away.) Another thing I did was ask some guy in a chair next to me if he could watch my stuff first. For some reason, I just knew this cat was getting ready to leave and wouldn't be able to do so. This made it even more natural for me to turn around to my target and ask.

Me: Hey can you do me a fa- Wow I really like your glasses.
Her: Oh Thanks!
Me: Anyways, I forgot something at the food court, you mind watching my stuff for a second?
Her: Sure thing!

So I head over and walk into the food court. I stand for a second. Take my wallet out of my pocket and walk back with it in hand. When I return I thank her and ask her what she's working on.

The conversation was great guys. She hooks immediately and soon we're bantering back and forth. I find out her major, make some cold reads, tease her about watching shows related to her major. Have her guess what I study. Deep dive her about some of her other interests. I don't know what to say guys I was pretty much super warm socially and the right things to say just popped into my mind and I said them.

After about 10 minutes or so I say I should get back to work, but that I really enjoyed our conversation. She agreed. I then asked if she was single, and if so we should grab some coffee some time to continue things. She was and I got her number and texted her right then. I continue to do some work until she leaves. Once she does I move to a more favorable study spot.

It was easily my best interaction to date. Guys I'm telling you my game was so tight. I'm really proud of myself.

This puts me at fucking 7 Approaches on the day. I'm honestly blown away at myself. This isn't a product of my game improving by leaps and bounds. I'm self-aware enough to know that game-wise I'm barely scratched the surface of what's possible. Really what it's come down to is getting out of my head, facing my AA, conquering it, and allowing myself to be in play for some wins.

Today's a huge step forward for me, but it's just the first step. This first taste of success has only left me craving more.

Time to get after it.

19 More Approaches
 

Protean

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Nov 18, 2019
Messages
115
Another intraday update.

The game giveth and the game taketh away boys.

Both approaches from my last post turned out to be duds. The girl I met at lunch only acknowledged my initial text, but hasn't responded to my second text to schedule a data. The girl from the library hasn't responded to either. Real shame especially on the later chick, but that's how things go sometimes.

Thus far today I've three approaches (with a couple shorter interactions that went nowhere)

Approach 1:
Was in a computer lab working on a project due later this week when I saw her on one of the individual seats.Saw her and knew I had to approach. Took out my phone and walked by while pretending to be on it, "noticed" her, then opened"

Me: Hey (pause) I really like your hair. I'm Protean.
Her: Thanks I'm [name].

I started the interaction with my body faced away from her then slowly turned to face her as she invested more in the interaction. Eventually sat down next to her and we had a decent conversation. She definitely hooked and was contributing to things, but I didn't sense attraction. This was confirmed when I suggested we get coffee sometime. She responded by with "Maybe" lol. I eventually told her to let me grab her number and we'll see. Sent the initial text a couple hours later and haven't heard anything. Still, I made the approach and I'm playing to win.

Approach 2:
This happened later in the day after I ate. Saw this really cute black chick with a nice pair of earrings on so I went for the approach.

Me: Hey (pause)
Her: Hi
Me: (Continues) I saw you walking there and I had to say I really like your earring. I'm Protean.
Her: Thank you .I'm [name]

She was walking her bike as we chatted. Again didn't sense much attraction here and the interaction was cut short when she was approaching a bike rack to park. I said fuck it and asked if she was single and she said she wasn't. Wished her a good day and left.

Approach 3:
Eyed up this decent chick in a slick brown jacket until I saw this dime of an Asian walking the other way. Really nice ass, curvy (not fat fellas, thicc lol) and a really nice head of hair. I immediately switch targets and go in for the approach

Me: Hey (pause) I saw you walking there and I've gotta say I really like your hair. The color, the styling, it looks good. I'm Bo
Her: Thanks. I'm [name]

Yeah short interaction and she never hooked or seemed that interested. She quickly said she needed to head a different way, nut I asked if she was single anyway which she said she wasn't.

Pretty much 0 / 3 thus far. Despite that though, I'm not mad. I'm making plays and giving myself an opportunity.

Still need to convert one of these approaches to a date. I'll figure it out!

16 More Approaches
 

Científico

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Dec 20, 2018
Messages
437
Keep at it Protean - the more you approach the easier it gets! Mix it up with other types of social outings. And take those salsa classes!
 

Protean

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Nov 18, 2019
Messages
115
Don't think I'll get any more approaches done today so let's tally what additional ones I did.

Approach 4:
Was heading to the library to meet up with a group to do a project and I spotted this cute chick working on one of the lounge chairs. I walk by her once, then realizing I walked the wrong way, I walk by her again and decide to approach.

Don't really remember my opener word for word but it wasn't different from what I normally do. Think I complimented her on her glasses. Anyway, the interaction was a little rush since I had a legitimate time constraint. I asked for her number so we could hang out sometime and she handed it to me to type in. It just didn't feel right doing it that way. I think it's better to give the girl your phone and have her enter her number herself. It's subtle, but I could feel the difference.

I sent the initial text a couple hours later and haven't heard back yet. Might be a dud, but it's too early to tell.

Approach 5:
After wrapping up the meeting I see this girl ahead of me with great hair and a nice set of lips. I head down to approach. Again don't really remember this interaction as well, but I definitely fucked up. I asked her where she was off too, and she responded in this really shy way. In hindsight, It may have been an IOI, but I started to get really self-conscious. We had another awkward exchange and at the end I let her go.

I'm annoyed at myself at getting rattled like that. Normally when I'm in set, I'm really good at thinking on my feet. Luckily I'm pretty confident that it was just a hiccup on my part. This didn't happen in my later approaches.

Approach 6:
Was walking away from the last approach a little annoyed with myself until I saw another beauty pass me by. Nice ass great. Great hair. I had to go for it. I take a minute to catch up with her then I open her again, complimenting her on how nice her hair looked. She looked surprised and flattered.

The ensuing conversation was just okay. Asked her questions about her major and why she chose it, along with her what her plans were after school. It was me mainly driving the conversation. Don't think she really hooked at all.

Finally she had to go in a different direction, but I played to win and asked if she was single. She smiled the biggest smile, but said she wasn't. Ended up letting her go.

Approach 7:
Was on my way a computer lab close to my father's workplace, when I saw a really cute Asian girl walking up to the intersection. She had a really nice outfit on, and that's something I really value in women (a good sense of fashion). Naturally then, I used that to approach.

Me: Hey I saw you, walking over there and I just had to come say, I really like your outfit. It's really well put together. I'm Protean.
Her: Oh. Thanks. I'm [name]

This girl was really shy. In the past I probably would have ejected quickly, but I just assumed that her shyness was from attraction. And guys I tried, I really did, but this girl was giving me nothing conversationally:

Me: So [name] how's you're day been?
Her: It's gone okay.
Me: Just okay? Why not great? Why not terrible? What made it so middle of the road?
Her: I don't know it's just been one of those days. I just got out of class.
Me: And what class did you have?
Her: Just my structures class.
Me: Structures you say? Then you're what, a civil engineer?
Her: Architect actually.
Me: Nice. What made you want to get into architecture?
Her: I don't know I just picked it.
Me: Okay so you just closed your eyes, picked a random major, and it ended up being architecture then. (This line said in jest ALWAYS gets girls to explain their choice of study further.)
Her: Pretty much. (Wtf wasn't expecting that response haha)
Me: Okay, let's just say (our school) just up and decided to cancel the architecture program. What would you do then? (Let's try this angle then)
Her: Yeah I'm not sure, this is just what my parents wanted. (Damn this interaction is busted)

At this point she was saying she was flattered and that it was nice meeting me. She said she was flattered earlier in the conversation, but I persisted (in a socially graceful way of course). Now it was pretty obvious she was not interested.

Part of me thinks I asked too many questions in an attempt to get her to hook, but what else was a going to do? That thread about her parents may have been an avenue to explore, but I only noticed it in hindsight.

Still the game is super fun and I'm hooked. None of the rejections really hurt me at all. The tension of approach anxiety is exponentially worse, than anything a girl as thrown at me. Even a harsh rejection wouldn't really phase me at this point.

Besides the botched interaction, the only time I got pissed today was due to my Apple Watch. It would buzz my wrist, and I'd bring it up expecting a text from one of the numbers I got, but all I'd see was a notification reminding me to breath lol. It was pretty cruel.

12 More Approaches
 
Last edited:

Protean

Space Monkey
space monkey
Joined
Nov 18, 2019
Messages
115
Keep at it Protean - the more you approach the easier it gets! Mix it up with other types of social outings. And take those salsa classes!

Thanks man! Salsa is absolutely in the cards for me in the future. There are some malls in the area I'll head to for daygame sessions as well.
 
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