Sexual Technique  Wet dreams ruining streak

Kaida

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Jul 6, 2020
Messages
541
Recently I’ve started holding in my sexual energy by not ejaculating, and doing a little sexual kung fu. I notice a slight boost in sexual behavior since.

However, I’ve noticed that after abstaining from ejaculation for around 5 days, I have a wet dream. I can feel the reduced sexual energy the next day.

This has been going on for months and I cant seem to actually get my sexual energy up to significant amounts. This is very frustrating

What can I do to fix this?

@StrayDog - I would heavily appreciate your input because from what I’ve seen you know the most about things like this
 

Wick

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Dec 25, 2012
Messages
1,083
Don’t sweat it.

Keep practicing moving the energy up your spine, no way you mastered it in a few weeks.

And even without the micro cosmic orbit (name of the technique of moving the energy up the spine) you will stop having wet dreams, just be patient with yourself.
 

Wick

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Dec 25, 2012
Messages
1,083
Think of it this way. That energy is intense. If you don’t give it a new channel to flow (micro cosmic orbit) it will find its way out.

Don’t try to hold it in. Give it a new path. It’s no big deal to have a wet dream, but it’s better to channel it throughout the body.

It’s no good to hold it in and drive yourself crazy though. Like I said be patient with yourself and keep practicing the orbit.
 

Surveyor

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Sep 2, 2022
Messages
941
Location
Los Angeles
I wouldn't worry too much about it. You're what, 17? Unless you've completely mastered sexual kung fu, your body needs to ejaculate sometimes.

Traditional Taoist masters recommended once in four days for age 20. I think you're doing fine.

I think the actual problem is that you're ejaculating into your pajamas, and not into a partner. Partnered sex involves energy exchange (unless something is very messed up), so typically you wouldn't feel significant energy reduction at normal ejaculation frequencies (say, twice a week).

As far as getting girls, too much urgency tends to be self-defeating. Just be patient, stop gaming your immediate social circle, and build your seduction skillset. I don't think you have much to worry about.
 

Ambiance

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Oct 8, 2015
Messages
497
Location
Beyond the Great Vast Forest
I do not recommend entirely abstaining from ejaculations. Anecdotally, this makes one overly emotional (which can be VERY dangerous...). Also, if you go long enough without ejaculating, your sex drive can diminish, especially if you are not around women. This is easily solved by jerking it a couple times in succession and/or by interacting with women.

So long as you minimize porn, don't masturbate excessively (dependent on your sex drive), and frequently interact with women, your sexual vibe should be more than fine.

Finally, ejaculating via sex, especially with women you find very attractive, will almost always bolster your sex drive after the initial come down (and sometimes this come down only lasts mere minutes!). I have had plenty of days in my life where a girlfriend and I have had sessions pushing past double digits in one day and are both incredibly sore, and I am STILL horny.
 

Will_V

Chieftan
Staff member
tribal-elder
Joined
Jan 24, 2021
Messages
1,539
I also don't agree with the idea of abstaining from ejaculations completely. As long as you don't make a big deal of it, and don't use porn, whacking off every few days or a week is not going to change anything.

If you had a girlfriend and you were having sex daily or every couple of days, is that going to turn you into a listless sheep? Sure the girl is there as a symbol that you earned it, but I'm not entirely sure the psychological and hormone effects are all that different compared to if she wasn't there.

At least, I can say from experience that I have sometimes had to put significantly more effort to stay on my path when I'm having frequent sex compared to when I'm not.

In my opinion, it comes down to how volatile your emotions are. Both sex and masturbation, when done impulsively as a form of escapism when you have shit bearing down on you and your stress level is high, causes you to become listless and anxious afterward. If it's your only source of dopamine and your brain is soaking in cortisol all day, it's really going to swing you around wildly.

But when you're actively planning and working toward goals, and your state is embedded in productive activity, neither sex nor masturbation has as much effect in my experience - and I believe it's because the alternative sources of dopamine prevent the deprivation/indulgence cycle that otherwise might occur.

That's why I think it's far better to worry about how you're spending your time productively than whether you're holding ejaculations or not.
 

Wick

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Dec 25, 2012
Messages
1,083
There's a difference between holding in ejaculations and practicing sexual kung fu.

One is like making a dam and stuffing yourself until you explode. Not good.

The other is a life long practice, developing the ability to channel that energy into your life. If you do it right, which requires one to be serious about the practice, you will never feel backed up or like you are holding it in. In fact you want that energy flowing freely, but throughout your body, well maintained and controlled, but fueling yourself with powerful potent energy for healing, thriving, creating, building, and loving.

So I agree with you both @Ambiance and @Will_V . It's not good to hold it in, and while one is practicing sexual kung fu, if he feels backed up or like he's going to explode, or is having problems because he is not ejaculating, it's because he is holding it in rather than creating flow.

But it also means he still is learning how to channel the energy.
 

Will_V

Chieftan
Staff member
tribal-elder
Joined
Jan 24, 2021
Messages
1,539
The other is a life long practice, developing the ability to channel that energy into your life. If you do it right, which requires one to be serious about the practice, you will never feel backed up or like you are holding it in. In fact you want that energy flowing freely, but throughout your body, well maintained and controlled, but fueling yourself with powerful potent energy for healing, thriving, creating, building, and loving.

Good point, libido can be used for non sexual activity.

Personally I don't find that much benefit from abstaining for too long from ejaculation, there will usually be a time when I go off the other side of the horse and get impatient and irritable. I actually perform best at life in general when I get a release every few days or once or week, whether with a girl or not.

But I have noticed that when I am really under pressure with something, I can go for weeks without even thinking about it because all my libido goes into whatever I need to do. So I agree that if you need to and are able to focus a lot of energy into something, maybe it's best to hold off until you have the sense that it would benefit you wind down the engine a little.
 

StrayDog

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Feb 23, 2022
Messages
656
everything all of these wise dudes have said.

The aim is to cultivate a lifelong practice based around the management of your sexual life force. It is not about strong-arming your seed into submission with a covetous mindset. It is unhealthy for the prostate to withhold ejaculation for too long. Wet dreams are the body's natural response to the build-up of sexual energy. It is just that energetic current finding a means of expression. It is a perfectly natural and healthy occurrence.

The idea isn't 'how much seed can I save' it is 'how can I relate to the flow of sexual energy, and its expression in my mind and body, in a balanced healthy manner that moves towards emotional, physical, psychological, and spiritual wellness in the long run. This is a long game practice, not a short game one.

Think about it like you are setting out to grow a lush and richly nutritious garden on which you can live abundantly. You start with planting the first seed, then the next, and the next. You tend to the soil daily, and when the time comes the plants sprout. Now you tend to the plants throughout the growing season and finally, when harvest time comes you reap the rewards. Now, this was just your first growing season. Being a wise beginner you were ambitious but not too ambitious. You didn't attempt to grow more than you could manage, thus spoiling the whole crop, nor did you think you could grow an entire fruit-bearing tree in one season, let alone an entire orchard. You grew 10 or twelve easy to manage plants. Some kale, some tomatoes, perhaps some zucchini. Given that this was your first go around some of the plants turned out better than others. Some with robust harvests, the majority are modest, and a couple of plants have withered. The successes outweigh the loss and you decide to grow for another season. This time with a bit more knowledge and ambition.

Now picture your garden three decades from now, after having put in the work year after year. The crops are varied, large, and lush. Trees that were barely twigs when you started have turned into a full-blown orchard.

You are already off to a good start by approaching your sexuality with intention and familiarizing yourself with these practices. Keep them in the forefront of your consciousness, and consistently practice them in your routine, over time. Understand that your sexuality is a force of nature. Just like the natural forces of a garden growing, this is not a force you can control. You can however come to understand the elements at play and work with them in dynamic ways. With knowledge, patience, and experience you can guide it, and shape its direction, but you can never control it. Just like the garden.

Continue to cultivate your practice. Be willing to face your sense of sexuality rather than running from it through compulsive hedonism or strict repression. Understand that there will be many seasons along the way, and some may be more challenging than others. Know that the more you have built an intentional foundation you will be able to weather the difficulties. And over time your practice will become richer and richer.

-Abstain from pornography
-Practice sexual kung fu mediation
-Keep a journal dedicated to your erotic reality. A book only you read. Write in it regularly. Your fantasies. Your aspirations. Things that compel you about the erotic nature of reality. Examining the thoughts and feelings you have are difficult and challenging. Examine your deeper sexual motivations. Celebrate the joys of your sexual experiences. The subtle things you enjoyed or noticed about sexual experiences. Write poems and tributes to your sexuality. Write down inspiring quotes on sex, positions you'd like to try with partners, and interesting concepts you read about.
-Do not limit your sense of sensuality to mechanistic forms, or practices that numb your senses. But instead, cultivate a number of personal sensual practices, that broaden and deepen your sense of sensuality/sexuality. Experiment and play with sounds, scents, and textures.
-Abstain from sexual activities/ sexual couplings that undermine your personal sense of integrity and well-being.
-Co-create positive sexual experiences with women whom you have wisely chosen to experiment with based on their character and chemistry.

Do all of these things regularly and you are already building a solid foundation for the rest of your life. Again, the path isn't always straight and narrow. These practices will help you have a center to come back to in the ebb and flow of it all.

In terms of frequency of ejaculation: Yes it is important to be mindful of not spilling your seed too much. However, ejaculation is a perfectly normal part of our physiology. Embrace its joy and pleasure. Just do so in a manner that is intentional. Instead of mindlessly masturbating to pornography, have semi-regular masturbation dates with yourself (like I outline here). When you spill your seed, rest assured that you are doing so in the spirit of personal cultivation and not needless waste. Just like when you grow a garden you plant many seeds knowing not all will grow. As long as the harvest wields more fruit than what is lost. Ejaculate as a means of engaging with the outward orgasmic facet of your sexuality. Just not to excess. Always cultivate more seed than you let loose. And of course, enjoy orgasms when having sex (at least for now. you can always experiment with abstaining from ejaculation during sex later once you understand how libido management fits into your life in a broader sense)

As @Surveyor said, start with ejaculating once every 4 or 5 days. Then experiment with longer periods. The aim is to keep your sexual energy abundant and strong but also allow it some release. Over time you will be able to strike more of a balance between keeping the sexual flame stoked through sexual practices, and managing longer periods of retention without letting the sexual flame die, or experiencing emotional agitation from repressed sexual energy. But again, this is a long game. not a short game. So don't try to make a tree grow in a month.

Also, understand that while you are young your libido tends to be way more raging than when you are older. In this sense, the young libido can be trickier to tame, but also it is the perfect training ground for libido management when you are older and your libido has slowed a bit, and sexual cultivation/semen retention is far more important to maintaining robust sexual energy, and channeling it towards longevity and well being. Start building the foundation now, and enjoy the fruits of your labor as you age.

All this is to say, don't worry dude. You are on the right track. Just remain diligent, be patient, and allow your sexual cultivation to be a means of personal exploration, expression, and joy. As opposed to a rigid set of rules or dogmas

Also, if you have a wet dream. Write it in your sex journal for further examination and insight.
 
Last edited:

Kaida

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Jul 6, 2020
Messages
541
Thanks @Wick @Will_V @Ambiance @Surveyor @StrayDog for your replies! Every single one of yall have helped with something valuable I can use and I deeply appreciate it

Practice sexual kung fu mediation
All I do is flex my “penis hop” muscles and imagine energy going up my spine. I havent had any full body orgasms or new experiences yet. Am I doing it right?

PS: I also have a feeling that my slight forward head and lordotic posture problems may impede the travel of energy
 
Last edited:

Surveyor

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Sep 2, 2022
Messages
941
Location
Los Angeles
All I do is flex my “penis hop” muscles and imagine energy going up my spine.
You can try doing meditation-ey things like touching your spread palms to each other. Also make sure your back muscles aren't tight. I can't officially endorse cracking your back because doing it too much can apparently be bad for you.
I havent had any full body orgasms
Don't worry about it for now.
or new experiences yet.
What do you mean by "new experience"?
Also any orgasmic feelings will be quite small at first. It takes time to get to something at least as intense as a regular ejaculatory orgasm. (By the way, you'll find that your ejaculatory orgasms will improve too, in every way.)
Am I doing it right?
Most likely, yes.
 

Wick

Cro-Magnon Man
Cro-Magnon Man
Joined
Dec 25, 2012
Messages
1,083
Some guys learn it in a few weeks, some learn it over months.
 

Kaida

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Jul 6, 2020
Messages
541
What do you mean by "new experience"?

I mean anything new that indicates I’ve done something. like prostate orgasms, feeling the energy itself, etc

Also any orgasmic feelings will be quite small at first. It takes time to get to something at least as intense as a regular ejaculatory orgasm. (By the way, you'll find that your ejaculatory orgasms will improve too, in every way.)

Oh you’ve had one? I’ve been taking it seriously for about a week. I wonder how long it took to get to that point

PS: I’ve only attempted to pump “cool” energy up my spine. I’m going 1 month without jacking off so I havent done any warm or explosive practice yet.
 
Last edited:

Surveyor

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Sep 2, 2022
Messages
941
Location
Los Angeles
like prostate orgasms
Those usually require physical stimulation. If, like most straight guys, you don't feel comfortable fingering your anus (tbh I've tried it and it doesn't even work for me), you can reach it from the back end of the perineum, behind the PC muscle. Generally you need to already be a little turned on though.
feeling the energy itself
You'll gradually develop an awareness of it.

I’ve been taking it seriously for about a week. I wonder how long it took to get to that point
Longer than a week.
Actually I'm not sure exactly. Definitely after several weeks I remember having a lot of really intense spine/brain orgasms (and later ruined my streak after having one too many prostate orgasms), but I was in a particularly spiritual and maybe a little altered brain state at the time.
PS: I’ve only attempted to pump “cool” energy up my spine.
Have you tried doing it while you're sitting in class or otherwise in public? Highly recommended 😏

Also after a while your PC will get super toned and a little bigger. U might want to try having a girl feel it like it's your abs lol.
 

Kaida

Tool-Bearing Hominid
Tool-Bearing Hominid
Joined
Jul 6, 2020
Messages
541
Okay, now I’m practicing sexual kung fu and I started reading “The multi orgasmic man”. Great so far.

I can sort of feel the cool energy now when I circulate, but I’m not 100% sure if its really the energy or just placebo. I may have put too much energy in my crown as well because I’ve been having a slight headache.

Problem is tho, I cant seem to do spine / prostate orgasms.

A few months ago when I started researching semen retention, I learned how to stop orgasm without ejaculating. I can stay hard after as well.

I tried this technique while attempting to pump warm / explosive energy today. However, these orgasms were only in my genitals, and post-orgasm I felt sexual frustration along with a strong urge to ejaculate (which I resisted).

I did use porn I’ll admit. While I can get hard using my mind, it wasnt strong enough for me to pump. I’m watching porn less and less in general tho which is good.


Any extra help on achieving higher level orgasms? I tried just focusing like the book said and it fell flat.
 

StrayDog

Modern Human
Modern Human
Joined
Feb 23, 2022
Messages
656
Understand that when we are talking about "energy" in the body it refers to a number of physiological functions that factor into our felt/sensed experience.

Have you ever had a rush of blood to your head and you get lightheaded? We could consider that a sort of sensation of "energy." When you drink a cup of coffee and your adrenals get going, that is a sort of "energetic" sensation, is it not? Or when you lift weights and your muscles feel pumped up. These are all commonly sensed, albeit mundane, experiences with a specific "energetic" quality. Another perfect example would be the orgasm.

I think one common trouble we can encounter when working with these "energy" practices is that we are looking for something extraordinary. When in fact these kind of practices are more about tuning into and refining our mundane and super-mundane senses, and with this developed awareness, directing our physiological systems toward harmony and balance. This is why Qi Gong is a whole system that ranges from diet and exercise to meditation, and even interior design. When one is talking about the "flow of energy" in a living quarter, they are really just talking about how the spatial function affects our spatial awareness and sense of presence, in a sort of spatial environment, a physiological proprioceptive feedback loop. When you rearrange your furniture in a manner that feels more harmonious towards your personal disposition and sense of space while baring in mind the certain laws and limitations of the physical environment around you and using them to your advantage, this could be considered a sort of practiced manipulation of "energy" that creates more balance and well being in your life.

When we are talking about "energy" in regards to meditative physical practices, like taichi or sexual kung fu, the key to understanding these concepts, experiencing them firsthand, and directing them with intention, is to understand "energy" as a supermundane experience that takes place at the intersection of body and mind. A sort of feedback interplay between our physiology and our sensed experience. The more you are able to refine your awareness to tune into what would otherwise only be extremely subtle sensations or internal experiences, the more those experiences and sensations will become palpable, and amplified. Basically, the feeling of "energy" is just about becoming more sensitive to more subtle sensations in our body and mind that tend to go unnoticed.

A foundational element of these practices is honing/sharpening/refining your awareness, and directing inward towards strata of experience that we tend to ignore. This ranges from the mundane yet somewhat conscious, to deep within the subconscious/ unconscious mind. You are training your mind to look under the hood and begin to recognize the natural functions and patterns of the interplay between our psychic and physical reality. At the deeper edges of our unconscious mind, we recognize our physical reality and the external experiences we navigate with our bodies, purely as symbols. Dynamic internal concepts and imagery, serve as a sort of interpretive data set of self-understanding. It could be said that the direct experience of this typically unconscious strata of the mind, is the experience of "energy" in its rawest form. Bear in mind that this is a stratum of mind that is inextricably interwoven with our physical reality. In fact, physical reality and mental reality are one and the same. What angle we experience these phenomenological realities from really just depends on where our awareness is directed, and what mental/physical functions we are approaching with. For example, dreams arise from our body and a number of physiological factors contribute to the generation of the dream experience. This is an experience that we typically have when relatively unconscious. However, we as humans also have the potential to access our dream functions in a conscious manner, through meditative practices that induce dream-related physiological functions and brain waves, while remaining conscious or semi-conscious. So, Mediative practices are designed to train the mind to access the different levels of awareness available to us, by inducing a spectrum of physical/psych conditions that exist on a spectrum. Direct experience of "energy" is really just a hypersensitive finely tuned awareness of our everyday mundane reality. The deeper we dive into the dimensions of the mundane the more amplified and expansive the experience of the mundane phenomena becomes.

"Energy" is not something you are not already experiencing on some level. It is just a matter of how you are consciously accessing that experience. We live in a society where so much of our experience is externalized. Our awareness is constantly being pulled outside of self, and it becomes increasingly difficult to access more subtle dimensions because we are numb to them from endless external stimulation. It can be very difficult to tune into our internal sense of reality and trust the experiences we are having. The best way to access deeper supermundane strata of mind and body is to continually come back to mindfully intentional practice which allows the natural order of things to reveal itself to you. This means coming back to the practice every day, and slowly peeling back the layers of the onion. Know that there is no right or wrong experience, just experience. Seek to understand, through observation what your experiences could mean for your mental/physical system as a whole. Observation is key. Awareness is what will guide you. While there is plenty of great technical information available on these practices (and it is crucial we study those who have traversed the terrain before us, for insight and knowledge), understand that this information is only the map and that ultimately you will have to traverse the terrain yourself. There can be times when the whole thing feels impenetrable or dumbfounding. Our body and mind can be a real labyrinth sometimes, and knowing which direction to head in can be really challenging. This is when you have to trust your own deeper wisdom. Trust that your body and mind have the answers you seek. They are ultimately who will teach you what you need to know. Our body and mind already know the path toward balance and harmony, we need only listen. With intentional practice, over time you will come to be able to trust your own experience more.

So in terms of feeling "energy" just practice awareness every day. Turn your attention inward and see how deeply you can relax into yourself. Allow what you already know (on some level) to reveal itself to you. All the various mediative/physical traditions of practice are mere tools for accessing what is already available to us. Each practice has its own merit, but ultimately it is about how you approach the practice. Approach with an open yet focused mind, and trust your own inner compass. You'll be a super sayain in no time.

From what I understand you have gotten pretty good at the pumping mechanism at your pelvic floor, being able to withhold orgasm, and even having multiple orgasms in a row. This is definitely an important mechanism to hone in sexual kung fu, and no easy feat so congrats on the accomplishment. However, it is crucial to remember that too much tension in your groin, and a hyper-focus on this one mechanism can lead to pathologies of its own. It is crucial to think of the practice as holistic. For one, make sure the pumping at your pelvic floor is a gentle pumping that is integrated into the whole structure of your body. Do not create hypertension in this area. Remember that there are many other mechanisms at play in this practice that are all working in unison with an integrated holistic body system. The pelvic pump is just one piece of the whole picture.

In general, I would say it is probably wise to not get hyper-focused on the sexual aspect of this practice, and understand that is a practice to be integrated into a larger system of practices. Focus on other forms of opening up/integrating your body and mind as well. The more you have a well-rounded practice the easier it will be to incorporate your sexual practice in with success and balance. Do other restorative practices like yoga or chi gong, as well as breathing exercises, diet, and more external exercises like weight lifting or calisthenics. The more your body is open, integrated, aligned, and working as a whole system, the easier it will be to draw orgasmic "energy" upward and circulate it through your entire system in a balanced manner.

Personally, the practices I keep returning to and find the most depth in are qi gong silk reeling exercises, taichi, bagua, some yoga poses, Taoist breathing exercises, wim hof breathing, and calisthenics. Above all though I have had the most breakthroughs with tree post-standing exercises, in terms of opening and aligning my body with gravity and tapping into the natural rhythms and cycles of my physiology. I have outlined a number of these practices here in this post if you want a starting point to explore these concepts. You, of course, will find your own routine and the exercises that work best for you and that is just a matter of experimenting and over time cultivating what works best for you.

To address directly your question about moving "energy" up your spine, I would recommend (other than the practices I have mentioned above) you spend time with the sitting meditation/microcosmic orbit as I outline it in this post. For now, rather than focusing on drawing the energy upwards, just learn to tap into the natural rhythms and sensations of your body in the sitting position. Review all of the basic alignments I outlined, and key points on the body, and see if you can sense how they are all relating to one another. Review the other pumping mechanism I outline that aid in successfully drawing energy up your spine, not just the pelvic pumping. Read closely my suggestions on how to move your awareness through your body, and practice this meditation regularly until you feel like you are beginning to have a personal understanding of it through your own felt experience. See if how deeply you can sense into your body, Can you feel your organs? Does each organ have a unique sensational quality to it? How about all the way into the core of your bone marrow? Can you feel that deeply? What sort of brainwaves and mental states are you accessing when you feel that deeply? How relaxed do you have to be to feel that deeply? How alert do you have to be? As I said before, trust your intuition on this, it will all come together in time. Once you are more in tune with these natural rhythms and the pumping in your spine in relation to your connection to the earth, it will become more simple to direct more dense sensational experiences like an orgasm upward.

One small tip I can give you here for drawing energy upward is that where the mind goes energy follows. So if you are focused too much on the pelvic pump the energy is sure to stay in that region. Learn to create a relaxed clear channel through your whole body and directed your mind upward. The pelvic pump is just there to hand off orgasmic energy to the other channels in the body. You are not forcing things upward, but rather gently and intentionally guiding. The mind is the key driving factor though. Focus where you want the energy to go, rather than where you are directly experiencing it most intensely (in your genitals)

And lastly remember this is a lifelong practice that will only deepen more and more, so just take it one moment at a time and don't get too ahead of yourself. It is good to have an end goal in mind, but that might not actually look exactly like you think it does. So slow and steady. Planting one seed in the garden at a time.
 
Last edited:
Top
>