Member Poll  What questions would you like to ask a straight male escort?

West_Indian_Archie

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I am not surprised on the undivided attention/listening aspect.

That said what separates the average guy that attentively listens to a chick drone on about her day - and this guy - she respects him and finds him sexually attractive.

Whatever behavior chicks ask for is in addition to the unsaid sexuality and respect aspect.

That's why they deal with guys that they don't particularly like, and guys that don't particularly value them.

Comfort and rapport don't induce genuine sexual desire.
 

Will_V

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I am not surprised on the undivided attention/listening aspect.

That said what separates the average guy that attentively listens to a chick drone on about her day - and this guy - she respects him and finds him sexually attractive.

Whatever behavior chicks ask for is in addition to the unsaid sexuality and respect aspect.

That's why they deal with guys that they don't particularly like, and guys that don't particularly value them.

Comfort and rapport don't induce genuine sexual desire.
I agree that one should not look at what escorts do completely as being what women need from a seducer, since that's usually not what it's about.

And yet here we have a situation where women are literally paying a guy to listen, something obviously very valuable to them. If they could get whatever they get here from orbiters I'm sure they would.

So if a guy can position himself as non needy, good sexual fundamentals, and do a lot of conversational backseat leading it seems like active listening becomes a great asset.

I'd be interested to know how much and in what ways the escorts lead the conversations to produce a sense of satisfaction, do they do a lot of deep diving, where do they steer it etc. I imagine it's more personal than sexual in that context, I remember Simon mentioned connection building once or twice.

It's always seemed to me that the kind of guy a woman bangs is not so much a guy who does the opposite of what a nice guy does, but someone who simply doesn't allow himself to end up somewhere unpleasant.
 

Skjöldr

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first thing, great idea @Chase interviewing a male escort. learning how to become a man that girl wants bad enough that they will pay you for your company is quite remarkable. imagine if you did it for free...

and i agree with @West_Indian_Archie. girls can find AFC orbiters to actively listen to her yap on about whatever is easy enough. what is difficult however is getting chad to do it. that's where the monetary transaction comes in.
 

Will_V

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I entirely disagree. I've literally said the opposite.

WIA

Well I think we might actually agree, if we consider that the reason she can't get the same 'listening experience' from her orbiters is (at least partly) because of her lack of sexual attraction to them.

But then, what do you think is the value of listening itself in terms of seduction? I think it's worth mulling over this because it seems that this is the #1 thing a woman wants from an escort, something she will pay through the nose for, and it seems like an escort might have something we can learn from - after all that's the point of the article.

The possibilities as I see them are that:

a) the behavior of listening to a woman is completely beside the point in terms of seduction value, and all a woman really wants is the attractiveness of the escort, and him listening to her is not something she really cares about and is pretty much a dead end as a technique in itself.

b) the behavior of listening to a woman is something a woman likes, but only in a neutral way (not particularly helpful for seduction) and only from a guy she's sexually attracted to. Essentially wasted opportunity, but not necessarily destructive to seduction.

c) the behavior of listening to a woman is something a woman appreciates very much, it's something very valuable for her, and when paired with sexual attraction (and the ability to lead to evocative topics of personal interest to her) is a big boost for seduction.

I tend to think c) is correct because if listening is the #1 thing a woman chooses after opening a catalogue of men, I find it hard to believe it's going to nuke seduction or even be neutral toward it. The more I learn about women, the more I find that the paradoxes between what they apparently want and what actually works tend to dissolve simply by applying the right context.

Then the question is, how do these escorts manage conversations? I can hardly imagine they just let a woman sit there and whine about the nasty emails Sally from HR accidentally cc'd her on. It would be interesting to know if they use sexual topics as a way to keep a woman hooked and coming back, or whether it's safer for them (in terms of keeping her as a stable client) just to focus on personal connection, or what.

I'm very interested in this also because I had a SNL this year that was basically a textbook deep diving thing that didn't even really get sexual during the conversation and ended up with no LMR (she actually pulled my shirt off first lol). I basically spent 90% of the time listening and 10% leading her to emotional topics (relationships, family, travelling experiences, food interests etc). As far as I can tell, it was simply a combination of me listening and showing nonverbal sexual intent while she talked herself into an emotional state and built the connection between us.

I like this because this kind of low key seduction suits me, I prefer if possible things that rely on a more natural attraction buildup based on my fundamentals, rather than special techniques that might be effective but, at least for me, aren't that enjoyable.
 

Rain

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I entirely disagree. I've literally said the opposite.
and i agree with @West_Indian_Archie. girls can find AFC orbiters to actively listen to her yap on about whatever is easy enough. what is difficult however is getting chad to do it. that's where the monetary transaction comes in.
But she's not sleeping with the escort, right? Or is she sleeping with the escort?

So are the women effectively only paying a 'chad' escort, or do you both mean the woman is paying for a 'pua charming/has good game' escort?
 

Derek da man

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But she's not sleeping with the escort, right? Or is she sleeping with the escort?
That was a question that the article didn't really give a great deal of info on. It implies some may want that, and sometimes in a fairly kinky way, but the general reasons given for using an escort was about "the date experience". It may well end in sex but this was left somewhat open - in my view.
 

Derek da man

Cro-Magnon Man
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I'm very interested in this also because I had a SNL this year that was basically a textbook deep diving thing that didn't even really get sexual during the conversation and ended up with no LMR (she actually pulled my shirt off first lol). I basically spent 90% of the time listening and 10% leading her to emotional topics (relationships, family, travelling experiences, food interests etc). As far as I can tell, it was simply a combination of me listening and showing nonverbal sexual intent while she talked herself into an emotional state and built the connection between us.
I've had dates like this too - there is virtually no conversation about sex, just occasional acknowledgement that adults participate in different sexual activities with a small warm comfortable smile. I guess it could be a form of intrigue or being mysterious.

On the occasions it has happened there was, as you say, no LMR so I would think it's about allowing her the experience of relaxing and being herself without the need to put up barriers or present a certain image as she is not being judged by her partner. Going back to the article, I guess if she's going to hire an escort the thought of her being judged by her date has been addressed already.
 

Will_V

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That was a question that the article didn't really give a great deal of info on. It implies some may want that, and sometimes in a fairly kinky way, but the general reasons given for using an escort was about "the date experience". It may well end in sex but this was left somewhat open - in my view.
The escort did mention how open women were to casual sex iirc, so I imagine it does factor in, I did get the distinct impression though that the article was geared toward putting escorting in general in a socially acceptable light, which would appeal to their clientele.
 

Skjöldr

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@Derek da man from the article:

The physical attraction should be there already, seeing as they select an escort they like looks-wise.
They find it too much hassle with too many weirdos out there and the inevitable awkwardness of a date with someone not their type.
so yeah they pick someone their type lol. it's literally like online dating where they look at the best guy of their taste's pics and bio and go "yep that one" and with a swipe of their credit card they can get him NOW. whereas on online dating they gotta deal with hordes of unattractive men (in their view) only to not match with the perfect guys.
 

Chase

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That was a question that the article didn't really give a great deal of info on. It implies some may want that, and sometimes in a fairly kinky way, but the general reasons given for using an escort was about "the date experience". It may well end in sex but this was left somewhat open - in my view.

My assumption was they avoided going into that due to legality, but it seems prostitution in the U.K. is legal.

Secondary assumption here is it'd be tacky to talk about women paying for sex. Puts the women in a light they'd rather not be put into.

Instead, they're "just paying for company/companionship", and whatever happens, happens.

I assume however that the escort is not running away from women with personal hygiene issues simply due to not wanting to listen to them. If all you're doing is having a meal and listening, the hygiene issues shouldn't be a deal breaker (well... maybe. Depends how bad the hygiene issue I guess!).

I also assume that, as he notes encounters past a subsequent encounter are in hotels or him going straight to their homes, they aren't just meeting for room service and for the client to talk about her day.

Nor do I assume he is giving all these women massages and they are then saying, "All right then, sexy guy I paid for. Thanks for the massage and for listening! See you next time!" They can just rent a masseuse for that instead.

Presumably most of these women are going to want to get their money's worth, and receive a "full experience."

Women tend to be pretty horny creatures...

Chase
 

POB

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Presumably most of these women are going to want to get their money's worth, and receive a "full experience."
Exactly my take!

No seducer is gonna do all that work on them to get laid.
Basically they are flipping the script of the Alpha archetype to fit their unreal female phantasies:
- first romance with a very attractive stranger, who's way above their league, then romantic sex to consumate the disney.

They know they will probably never get that in real life, but hey, a lot of men feel the same when they pay hookers
(fast sex with a very attractive woman who's above them in looks).
 
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