- Joined
- Oct 21, 2023
- Messages
- 312
Thanks for this post.Totally agree! I think that improving interpersonal in any field (cold calling, making friends, approaching girls) is challenging because theres always that x factor of people.
When you go through your 30th call of the day with no sales and the guy on the phone says he hates your product and the company scammed his savings away, its not easy to make another call with a real smile on your face. Its even harder if your new and don't have alot of results.
When you make faus paux after faus paux trying to make friends for the first time, its just not a great time.
Typing on a keyboard is easy. Writing in a journal is easy. Going to the gym is easy. For some people, its really hard starting out. But anything interpersonal is twice as hard for other, because again, theres the x factor of people.
Your progress so far is great to see. Your approaching more and consistently more. The next step I would personally take is to start turning those approaches into dates, or at least phone numbers that will turn into dates.
As for how I do that, my process is taken from the last days of the newbie assignment strung together. Its all I know right know.
1. First I stand or sit down next to the girl, ideally close so she can hear me and I can bridge the proximity barrier. I lost most of the girls just by trying to approach to far away.
2. Then I open with “how’s you day going?” or “watcha working on?”, depending on whether their working on something or not
3. After responding, I tell them I think they’re cute and I want to say hi, with a smile on my face near the end of the sentence.
3. Then I introduce myself with "Im [name]" and reach my hand out to shake hands.
4. Then I either small talk or banter first, then weave in a little more banter. If she looked busy, I say "you looked so engrossed I practically had to drag you out of your boring day" or whatever variation of that feels comfortable coming out of my mouth. If not, I'll comment on her clothes and say its a little to early for x scarf or y hat, maybe you know something I don't. Honestly, I love to just add "maybe you know something I don't" to any tease regarding a choice she made. I also use a playful tone.
5. Lastly, I tell her I would love to grab a bite with the her sometime, and ask if she’d like that. I usually ask if I think the conversation is gonna die, or shes into it and asking me quesitons about myself or just talking more in general. When she says yes, I say I'll text her or wait for her to ask for my number. If she asks for my social, f that. I say I don't have any but i can text her. When she starts putting the phone number in, I resume the conversation or ask another question, to make the number grab nonchalent. That way she doesn't remeber you grabbing her number and leaving, but how attracted she was to you. And if everything works, she will definitly be into you.
As for getting numbers, I have been doing that. I just don't mention it here because I just want to quantify one thing at a time here. As of now, my biggest goal is to be able to approach 30+ girls/ week consistently. Once I get there I will work on the next thing.
I have been getting numbers though since August, had a few instant dates as well.