Having Trouble With Daygame

[Just a Man]

I'm guessing around 75 park approaches

So about 75 social circles that aren't yours but to which you could potentially have got introductions in at least some cases.
See my post just above to see where I'm coming from: https://www.skilledseducer.com/threads/having-trouble-with-daygame.25347/post-146372
Could you still tap any of these? Presumably some of these 75 liked you even if unavailable and/or not personally into you.

 

[Bacchus]

Meeting girls in parks can be a breeze if you have an effective process.

The process I'll describe begins before you open, to ensure that you are meeting women smoothly, regardless of whether they're sitting down on a bench somewhere, or up on their feet taking a stroll. Read the links to arm yourself with tools to start your approaches in both contexts on the right foot.

Next up is the question of what to say when you open. I said it yesterday and I'll say it again here. . . intriguing bait and reality pacing is where it's at:

"Have you ever noticed how relaxing it feels to be surrounded by nature?"

Let her agree with you before following this up with: "Sometimes we get caught up in the things we have to do. But if you stop and savor the moment. You see the green on the trees, feel the warm breeze and it's such a grounding experience." Use it to reach the hook point with moving and static chicks.

Then continue on the path to immersion. . . with an elicitation question:

"What's something you really enjoy doing that gives you a chance to take a break from reality and get in touch with how you feel?"

Since each answer you get will vary from girl to girl, you need to be quick on your feet at this stage. Ask yourself. . . what are some aspects of her hobby that engage the emotions and imagination. . . in a positive way. But don't talk about that just yet. . . dive deeper and ask her how she got into the hobby. Show some understanding. . . when she tells you the backstory. This part of the process does not have to be fancy. Just acknowledge what you've heard.

Follow this up with the stimulating insights into her hobby that you've been thinking about. I usually ask what part of the hobby is her favorite as I discuss two different emotional experiences I've discerned. . . while also giving her the opportunity to name another stimulating experience that I didn't mention.

This is how you charm unsuspecting women and get their egos on your side. Notice how the entire conversation between the two of you has been focused on her experience? So by this point her investment in the interaction is high enough to mirror the sexual vibe you should've been dialing up gradually from the moment you opened. . . and the social frame this process creates makes it easier for her to value anything you tell her about yourself.

So what you should do next is link her favorite part of the hobby you elicited. . . with an experience you've had from one of your hobbies. As the two of you discuss this similarity, look out for a high point. . . then shoot an invitation to coffee. So she can "tell you more" about it on a day 2 or instant date.

 

[Regal Tiger]

The ones that I approach aren't power walking though. They're just kinda walking normal lol

 

[Regal Tiger]

@Bacchus thanks for the lengthy reply, I'll check em out

 

[Regal Tiger]

I looked up some links somebody else mentioned up above that gave me thoughts on different openers to try


I'll give it all a try when I feel up to it

 

[Regal Tiger]

So about 75 social circles that aren't yours but to which you could potentially have got introductions in at least some cases.
See my post just above to see where I'm coming from: https://www.skilledseducer.com/threads/having-trouble-with-daygame.25347/post-146372
Could you still tap any of these? Presumably some of these 75 liked you even if unavailable and/or not personally into you.

A fair portion have said as much. Either that they think it's awesome I approached, or that I made their day or whatever

But I'm not really looking for female friends or social circles right now. Still a bit jaded if I'm being honest

 

[Glow]

Meeting girls in parks can be a breeze if you have an effective process.

The process I'll describe begins before you open, to ensure that you are meeting women smoothly, regardless of whether they're sitting down on a bench somewhere, or up on their feet taking a stroll. Read the links to arm yourself with tools to start your approaches in both contexts on the right foot.

Next up is the question of what to say when you open. I said it yesterday and I'll say it again here. . . intriguing bait and reality pacing is where it's at:

"Have you ever noticed how relaxing it feels to be surrounded by nature?"

Let her agree with you before following this up with: "Sometimes we get caught up in the things we have to do. But if you stop and savor the moment. You see the green on the trees, feel the warm breeze and it's such a grounding experience." Use this reach the hook point with moving and static chicks.

Then continue on the path to immersion. . . with an elicitation question:

"What's something you really enjoy doing that gives you a chance to take a break from reality and get in touch with how you feel?"

Since each answer you get will vary from girl to girl, you need to be quick on your feet at this stage. Ask yourself. . . what are some aspects of her hobby that engage the emotions and imagination. . . in a positive way. But don't talk about that just yet. . . dive deeper and ask her how she got into the hobby. Show some understanding. . . when she tells you the backstory. This part of the process does not have to be fancy. Just acknowledge what you've heard.

Follow this up with the stimulating insights into her hobby that you've been thinking about. I usually ask what part of the hobby is her favorite as I discuss two different emotional experiences I've discerned. . . while also giving her the opportunity to name another stimulating experience that I didn't mention.

This is how you charm unsuspecting women and get their egos on your side. Notice how the entire conversation between the two of you has been focused on her experience? So by this point her investment in the interaction is high enough to mirror the sexual vibe you should've been dialing up gradually from the moment you opened. . . and the social frame this process creates makes it easier for her to value anything you tell her about yourself.

So what you should do next is link her favorite part of the hobby you elicited. . . with an experience you've had from one of your hobbies. As the two of you discuss this similarity, look out for a high point. . . then shoot an invitation to coffee. So she can "tell you more" about it on a day 2 or instant date.

+1
THIS.

 

[Will_V]

Nice post from @Bacchus

Where I live a lot of hotter girls get up in sports gear and walk super fast, usually with earbuds. Can be a real challenge to do something smoothly indirect.

For girls strolling around, or resting somewhere, it's easier than normal, she's in a relaxed mood and there aren't a lot of distractions, great for creating a bubble.

 

[Regal Tiger]

God damn... words cannot express how utterly defeated I feel after today lmao


Went out approaching. Had a girl that I approached for like 30 seconds because she was waiting on another date. Got her number, told me to text me if she needed saving from her date. Texted me an hour later. Meet for drinks. Two hours later I finally get us out of there. Stop to use the restroom on the first floor of her apartment building. She leaves and goes to her room. I already know that I fucked up at this point. Hear her and the roommate she has talking.

Nobody answers the door and I can hear the roommate trying to hush her and the dogs.



Damn.... I honestly liked this chick too. She was super into me as well (she made a bet off skeeball that I had to kiss her [I made sure to keep it short and pulled away first though] and she even started talking about going on a second date while on the first). Fuck me sideways with a limp dick.... I dun goofed on my first possible success at the very last second





Side note; I just feel better when projecting stronger energy. Going to keep trying to test it out a bit, even though that one day I literally couldn't even get into a conversation.

Damn gents... really feel like shit on this one. We actually got along pretty well. What can I say? oh well, maybe one of these days

 

[mist]

God damn... words cannot express how utterly defeated I feel after today lmao


Went out approaching. Had a girl that I approached for like 30 seconds because she was waiting on another date. Got her number, told me to text me if she needed saving from her date. Texted me an hour later. Meet for drinks. Two hours later I finally get us out of there. Stop to use the restroom on the first floor of her apartment building. She leaves and goes to her room. I already know that I fucked up at this point. Hear her and the roommate she has talking.

Nobody answers the door and I can hear the roommate trying to hush her and the dogs.



Damn.... I honestly liked this chick too. She was super into me as well (she made a bet off skeeball that I had to kiss her [I made sure to keep it short and pulled away first though] and she even started talking about going on a second date while on the first). Fuck me sideways with a limp dick.... I dun goofed on my first possible success at the very last second





Side note; I just feel better when projecting stronger energy. Going to keep trying to test it out a bit, even though that one day I literally couldn't even get into a conversation.

Damn gents... really feel like shit on this one. We actually got along pretty well. What can I say? oh well, maybe one of these days

Dig in a bit more.

How'd you lose your buy-in, her state drop so much, her roommate beat you out with her? I mean she made no attempt to defend or extend. How long was this meet, did you repeatedly miss windows, do you have SMMA(keys) and or One Date(SAC) or a model you can analyze this interaction up against, what was your decision making built around(why not go upstairs to piss?)

Also don't be too hard on yourself with near pulls. I am as well and we both know it isn't worth it. Plus Teevster has said it is actually a good thing to start getting near or string of pulls. Means you're getting closer. Almost at the breakthrough.

Sadly this is where I get peak frustrated, BUT by keeping this in mind I hope you'll go easier on yourself and try to soak in the lessons rather than beat yourself up. Writing it out will give you some peace as well. Perhaps message her as usual and end with a parting shot if she's responsive but flimsy.

She obviously fucked with you and another girl will as well.

Theoretical abundance when you don't actually have abundance yet.

Big Picture and break it down.

 

[Regal Tiger]

Dig in a bit more.

How'd you lose your buy-in, her state drop so much, her roommate beat you out with her?

They were arguing a little bit. After thinking back she may have been drunker than I thought, but I only saw her drink like three

I mean she made no attempt to defend or extend. How long was this meet,

2 hours, shoulda been less at the place but when I suggested we take a walk she needed up getting that last beer that took like a half hour lol

did you repeatedly miss windows, do you have SMMA(keys)

Not sure what keys are but I got one date

As for windows, haha I got lost in conversation again so it very well could be possible that I missed a window or two

However I did attempt to get her outta there after one more game (like two minutes later so it didn't look like I was being reactive) when she wanted that kiss

and or One Date(SAC) or a model you can analyze this interaction up against, what was your decision making built around(why not go upstairs to piss?)

I was bursting at the seams and it was the first place I saw. It did cross my mind to try and pull her into the bathroom with me. But I was in pain

You don't understand how much water I needed for this date after walking around for like 5 hours (nothing worse than being too dehydrated to get it up, ask me how I figured that one out lmao)

Side note, I need to stop posting when I'm in pain. My legs still hurt from yesterday

Also don't be too hard on yourself with near pulls. I am as well and we both know it isn't worth it. Plus Teevster has said it is actually a good thing to start getting near or string of pulls. Means you're getting closer. Almost at the breakthrough.

Hope so, but honestly I'm attributing this date (getting the date, not the date itself) to luck more than anything. Honestly, the interaction HAD to be short or nothing lol

And yeah, you're probably right but I've always been hard on myself. It feels like the right thing to do to get the results that you want

There's a quote I enjoy that's paraphrased like "be gentle and understanding with other people but be a harsh master to yourself". Something like that

Sadly this is where I get peak frustrated, BUT by keeping this in mind I hope you'll go easier on yourself and try to soak in the lessons rather than beat yourself up. Writing it out will give you some peace as well. Perhaps message her as usual and end with a parting shot if she's responsive but flimsy.

We shall see. But I definitely understand what you mean by peak frustrated. But my thing is, is that i basically never hear back from women you get to a certain point with. That's the part that annoys me the most

If I'm being real, I personally wouldn't mind waiting until date two or even three to have sex. But that leaves WAAAAAY too much to chance. So I kinda feel forced to go for it on the first

Not that I mind, but still lol

She obviously fucked with you and another girl will as well.

Theoretical abundance when you don't actually have abundance yet.

Big Picture and break it down.

Yeah, this is true. Honestly I just need to wait to post. Also, I literally thought this was my journal haha. Whoops


Edit: also, just to test my thoughts, I did go back to the park and approached more there. I looked for women who were dressed normally (or even up a bit) and women who were dressed in yoga pants and workout looking shirts

But again, I gotta stress, neither group is working out. They're not running or even power walking or nothing

The dressed crowd seem to do better, so I guess that's progress lol

Also realized why a lotta guys are liking older women based on one of Chase's newer articles about women needing reasons to have sex (and older women not needing as many reasons). Older women around 30 absolutely love a direct approach in my experience. The younger ones not so much

Not sure if that's just me, if that's just because of the vibe I've used or what's going on there. More testing is required

 

[Regal Tiger]

Huh.... this is gonna sound weird but I think I have like an anti-entitlement issue

Kinda like an I don't deserve mentality or something

Gonna need to fix that

 

[mist]

There's a quote I enjoy that's paraphrased like "be gentle and understanding with other people but be a harsh master to yourself". Something like that

Not sure what keys are but I got one date

As for windows, haha I got lost in conversation again so it very well could be possible that I missed a window or two

However I did attempt to get her outta there after one more game (like two minutes later so it didn't look like I was being reactive) when she wanted that kiss

I was bursting at the seams and it was the first place I saw. It did cross my mind to try and pull her into the bathroom with me. But I was in pain

You don't understand how much water I needed for this date after walking around for like 5 hours (nothing worse than being too dehydrated to get it up, ask me how I figured that one out lmao)

Side note, I need to stop posting when I'm in pain. My legs still hurt from yesterday

This is a massive oversight.

No wonder you're having a rough time.

Your Macro Problems

1. You're not measuring your successes and failures. You have no rubric you (using a flimsy one).

2. You're not using the rubric to elevate your future interactions.

3. You accept the initial notes thoughts jotted down without examination and refinement.

Issues that have slowed me down as well. Even if you credit this to luck break down the factors/decisions that aided/thwarted you. If you want it you have to distill this into a science and skill for a time.

What I've Done With These Problems

Problem 1. You're not measuring your successes and failures. You have no rubric you (using a flimsy one).

Answer. For me I had to drop ego and see how patchwork I am. Nowadays I'm focusing solely on trying to get results with Gunwitch's SMMA and Chase's One Date (some have complained about the video. Just skip it to get to the purchase page.) Using these I have a tool to put up against my approaches and interactions even passively and without FR's, but with an FR I'm guaranteed to start piecing things together with my rubric.

Both are flexible and focal system meaning your seductions can be very different within them, but you also could go pretty much straight routine game, provided you are abiding by the ideas within them and are smart with their use.

Now I have many rubrics. Some mix better than others. If I get bored with one or need to get a tighter pinpoint of something I can move. Here's my December catalogue of rubrics and formats for FR's and how my brain thinks about seduction from a process, art, science standpoint.

FR - Field Report, 3-7x a week.

Whats up guys, Small intro about myself. I live in Texas. I've been reading Girlschase material for the past 10 years, started cold approaching legitimately 4 years ago. I've been with about ~70ish women, evenly broken down between day game, night game, online game, and social circle (hostels...

www.skilledseducer.com

I also want you to check out off the top of my head.

Skippy and Kvothe

They write some of the best FU, FR with the most utilization.

Compare their writing about L's or let downs to ours...it's awesome and informative stuff as opposed to "Woe is me. This is taking a long ass time...fuck."

I very much so urge you to get a rubric.

Whether Bacchus's 3 leg chair ( 3 keys from SMMA Social frame, sexual escalation, emotional stimulation.)

Teevster's A-Z seduction view (Preopener, open, hook, isolation, extraction, close.)

Chase's blah blah blah YOU GET IT.

Find it and get it going. So worth it. My approaches hook so much better and problems are solvable sometimes on the very next approach as opposed to thinking about it all night in the fetal position cursing god for not delivering me yet another big titty milf :').

Problem 2. You're not using the rubric to elevate your future interactions.

Answer. For me it's more of an emotional decision than a logical decision not to dig in. CBT and little wins has helped me breakthrough it, but admittedly writing and thinking over interactions I am way less than satisfied with or even outright despise is not a fun past time for me. Failure, shortcomings, losing is a necessary but unsavory experience for me.

A. Practicing gratitude.

B. Breaking down the value system of whoever is judging me. Seeing if I still care when it's put towards its extreme. Both mine and theirs. Because mostly you're judging yourself and in your head. People aren't as in-depth thinking about you as you'd think. All people are self conscious, but they are not equally as locked in as we are. Dudes learning seduction, social skills, and really any skill/goal indepth run into things some will never experience. Hard to realize when you're in your own head...like your whole life.

C. Reframe like a motherfucker then act. I'm not big on inner game. I find it woo woo admittedly, but there is no denying state and cognition effect behavior and thus results. I'm still working on this part admittedly, but exercise and little wins have helped.

Problem 3. You accept the initial notes thoughts jotted down without examination and refinement.

Answer. Wanna know why I really am enjoy Kvothe's, Bacchus, Skills, Lobo, really any gamer who does this one thing???

Links.

That small effort showcases they didn't accept their first inclinations without exploration and really trying to nail it down.

Everything you run into infield or with game has been written about 1 million billion times sometimes with with different terminology but the same concept essentially.

Example.

AFC = PUA Lingo

Beta = Redpill Lingo

Normie = Nerd Lingo

May or may not be right but you get the point right? But gradually start finding the lingo for what you are looking to accomplish and or who you are trying to communicate with and you'll be in great shape for many reasons that are off topic rn, but lmk if you're interested.

but anyway let's use something you wrote as an example of examining and refining.

Here's brief examples and imagine this is you looking at this (preface that everything you think and have written has been talked about and explored a bajillion times. Keep searching for where. It's way easy now with google.)

1.

God damn... words cannot express how utterly defeated I feel after today lmao

Hypothetical Regal: Hmm quite the reaction

Maybe I should look into dealing with failure.

Teevster's momentum and did the game drop me article might be good

*You search it see what you find*

Hypothetical Regal: Oh this TRE CBT thing looks cool...

*couple hours later*

Hypothetical Regal: Oh wow I really do run into that problem quite a bit...what a nifty solution. NOICE!

2.

Went out approaching. Had a girl that I approached for like 30 seconds because she was waiting on another date. Got her number, told me to text me if she needed saving from her date. Texted me an hour later. Meet for drinks. Two hours later I finally get us out of there. Stop to use the restroom on the first floor of her apartment building. She leaves and goes to her room. I already know that I fucked up at this point. Hear her and the roommate she has talking.

Hypothetical Regal: Some sketchy decision making near the end. Seemed to be going well...

Could I have made her watch some of my stuff really quickly as compliance?... hmm

Let's focus on my decisions

*Google search*

Oh shit Teevster has an excellent article series on calibration and decision making. WOW.

*Couple Hours Later*

They were arguing a little bit. After thinking back she may have been drunker than I thought, but I only saw her drink like three

Hypothetical Regal: HMM this is important

She's arguing with her roommate which could most definitely drop state, plus she might be slightly drunk with a stranger to her roommate...

That's random...maybe I should look up dealing with random things. Could I have pulled her somewhere else that nullified this risk? Did I know she had a roommate?

*Google search*

Oh shit Teevster has an awesome series on wildcards and logistics

Skills also talks about screening and Chase has some cool tips to prevent these things

WOWOWOW.

Not sure what keys are but I got one date

As for windows, haha I got lost in conversation again so it very well could be possible that I missed a window or two

However I did attempt to get her outta there after one more game (like two minutes later so it didn't look like I was being reactive) when she wanted that kiss

Hypothetical Regal: Idk what keys are...

*Google search with girlschase*

WOW that's a lot of people writing about this! Must be useful or something.

Also I'm a little unsure of the windows thing.

*Google search*

Oh shit articles on buying temp, escalation windows, and signs of horniness

Plus someone escalation tips

WOWOWOWOW.

(Mist: Also not sure if that fractionation was useful or not...from my understanding at high temp you are allowed to break some rules move faster. In fact she wants it, but while building/sustaining fractionation is potent. Weird decision imo but back to Hypothetical you.)

2 hours, shoulda been less at the place but when I suggested we take a walk she needed up getting that last beer that took like a half hour lol

Hypothetical Regal: I wonder why she resisted the pull? Was I overeager and jumped too early with buying temp...was it token resistance....could I have plough.

Was she bored, scared, needed more comfort? What was the resistance?

*Google search*

WOWOW

Tons of articles on persistence and resistance.

I really like Teevster's.

(Mist: Ok at this point I sent you can see I'm pretty bad at writing hypothetical you on this journey to breakdown the interaction haha.

3.

Edit: also, just to test my thoughts, I did go back to the park and approached more there. I looked for women who were dressed normally (or even up a bit) and women who were dressed in yoga pants and workout looking shirts

But again, I gotta stress, neither group is working out. They're not running or even power walking or nothing

The dressed crowd seem to do better, so I guess that's progress lol

Also realized why a lotta guys are liking older women based on one of Chase's newer articles about women needing reasons to have sex (and older women not needing as many reasons). Older women around 30 absolutely love a direct approach in my experience. The younger ones not so much

Not sure if that's just me, if that's just because of the vibe I've used or what's going on there. More testing is required

Ok no more hypothetical you.

I challenge you to make this real.

What happened here? What rubric are you using? What are you going to search in relation to this?

Are you interested in target selection/easier vs harder sets, better open-hooks, fundamentals, Vibing and meeting smoother?

This is all for you though. Maybe if she’s responsive you’ll get her based off what you know now, but this analysis is for macro level success. Not an excuse for oneitis…far from it

Might not get it from her, but you’ll get it from somewhere and your XP with her will have helped. (Stole that from Ricardus movie reviews while doing exactly what I am telling you.

Figure it out


LOOK AT ME-LOOK AT ME

You are the captain now

 

[weekendwarrior]

Huh.... this is gonna sound weird but I think I have like an anti-entitlement issue

Kinda like an I don't deserve mentality or something

Gonna need to fix that

@Regal Tiger I know the feeling. I feel like I'm not good enough for the really hot chicks. When I get out of my head and approach anyway I surprise myself when they're interested.

I think it's a lack of confidence and self belief. Even with past success with incredibly hot chicks I still have self doubt. I'm working on it.

Warrior

 

[hey_lover]

You can't extrapolate your results from online and apply it to daygame. They are two completely different beasts. You have to understand that girls you meet during the day aren't asking to meet a man so there's going to be a lot of variance in your results.

Once you get your approach and conversation game down pat, you will be able to meet and hook girls but then you'll run into intermediate problems where girls will waste your time or will LJBF you because again, they're not necessary looking to date.

I wouldn't rely exclusively on daygame ( even though I do, lol) because it won't generate the level of results you can get from night or online game. Ideally, you can get easy girls from online and supplement with nightgame to build momentum, and then carry it with you to succeed during the day.

 

[Regal Tiger]

I know you're trying to help and I greatly appreciate it. But I had a gut reaction to some.of this advice and I had to step away and think about it for a few days, hoping you can help me.understand this better because I'm not sure that I do

Your Macro Problems

1. You're not measuring your successes and failures. You have no rubric you (using a flimsy one).

I measure my successes and failures. It's just that there's only one fork of success for me, and that's what I want in the moment

Do I want a date? That's the success

Do I want sex? That's the success

Do I want a relationship? That's the success

Anything other than what I want I view as failure. If I can pinpoint where I fucked up then that's good, but it's still failure

Like the girl I mentioned. I know exactly where I goofed. Shoulda been more insistent on pulling her outta there before that last beer. Shoulda pulled her into the bathroom with me. Etc.

2. You're not using the rubric to elevate your future interactions.

Not entirely sure what you mean by rubric? Do you mean mine or somebody else's?

3. You accept the initial notes thoughts jotted down without examination and refinement.

I approach things with the mindset of 'i need to test this as long as it doesn't feel overly incongruent to who I am'

As long as it passes that judgement, I'll accept anything and test it out. Hell, if you could make a good enough case about how dressing up as a literal clown would get me chicks, I'd at least consider it (would have to be a damn good argument though)

Issues that have slowed me down as well. Even if you credit this to luck break down the factors/decisions that aided/thwarted you. If you want it you have to distill this into a science and skill for a time.

Oh, I just say luck because it was such a short initial interaction - literally like 30 seconds lol

Yeah, I've worked on body language, my vibe and continue to work on voice tonality which all play a role but ultimately, 30 seconds in my mind is a hail Mary

What I've Done With These Problems

Problem 1. You're not measuring your successes and failures. You have no rubric you (using a flimsy one).

Answer. For me I had to drop ego and see how patchwork I am. Nowadays I'm focusing solely on trying to get results with Gunwitch's SMMA and Chase's One Date (some have complained about the video. Just skip it to get to the purchase page.) Using these I have a tool to put up against my approaches and interactions even passively and without FR's, but with an FR I'm guaranteed to start piecing things together with my rubric.

Both are flexible and focal system meaning your seductions can be very different within them, but you also could go pretty much straight routine game, provided you are abiding by the ideas within them and are smart with their use.

Now I have many rubrics. Some mix better than others. If I get bored with one or need to get a tighter pinpoint of something I can move. Here's my December catalogue of rubrics and formats for FR's and how my brain thinks about seduction from a process, art, science standpoint.

FR - Field Report, 3-7x a week.

Whats up guys, Small intro about myself. I live in Texas. I've been reading Girlschase material for the past 10 years, started cold approaching legitimately 4 years ago. I've been with about ~70ish women, evenly broken down between day game, night game, online game, and social circle (hostels...

www.skilledseducer.com

I'll look at it probably tomorrow, thank you

I also want you to check out off the top of my head.

Skippy and Kvothe

They write some of the best FU, FR with the most utilization.

Compare their writing about L's or let downs to ours...it's awesome and informative stuff as opposed to "Woe is me. This is taking a long ass time...fuck."

Oh I'll agree that I've been to whiny lately. Got a lot going on and I'm trying to distance myself from doing that as much

I very much so urge you to get a rubric.

Whether Bacchus's 3 leg chair ( 3 keys from SMMA Social frame, sexual escalation, emotional stimulation.)

Teevster's A-Z seduction view (Preopener, open, hook, isolation, extraction, close.)

Chase's blah blah blah YOU GET IT.

Find it and get it going. So worth it. My approaches hook so much better and problems are solvable sometimes on the very next approach as opposed to thinking about it all night in the fetal position cursing god for not delivering me yet another big titty milf :').

When you say rubric do you mean a system?

Problem 2. You're not using the rubric to elevate your future interactions.

Answer. For me it's more of an emotional decision than a logical decision not to dig in. CBT

I dunno what CBT is

and little wins has helped me breakthrough it, but admittedly writing and thinking over interactions I am way less than satisfied with or even outright despise is not a fun past time for me. Failure, shortcomings, losing is a necessary but unsavory experience for me.

A. Practicing gratitude.

I'm admittedly weak in this area

B. Breaking down the value system of whoever is judging me. Seeing if I still care when it's put towards its extreme. Both mine and theirs. Because mostly you're judging yourself and in your head. People aren't as in-depth thinking about you as you'd think. All people are self conscious, but they are not equally as locked in as we are. Dudes learning seduction, social skills, and really any skill/goal indepth run into things some will never experience. Hard to realize when you're in your own head...like your whole life.

C. Reframe like a motherfucker then act. I'm not big on inner game. I find it woo woo admittedly, but there is no denying state and cognition effect behavior and thus results. I'm still working on this part admittedly, but exercise and little wins have helped.

Check out some state control stuff if you'd like to work on this. Helps tremendously

There aren't many things I feel qualified to brag about, but my state control is perfect. I might not be choosing the correct emotional state, but I do know it's perfect (won't give the full details because ya never know when something can bite you in the ass but that recent success, and how I know my state control is perfect involves actual equipment)

This helps me to honestly feel good while doing approaches. It's after when I feel like shit haha

Problem 3. You accept the initial notes thoughts jotted down without examination and refinement.

As mentioned above I'm willing to give most things a chance, if it doesn't feel incongruent to me, myself and I. And honestly my pride

As an example, Chase's recent article about women needing a reason to have sex. My own experiences with approaching women (both direct and indirect). It spawned a few thoughts for me

Now that I have something to measure I plan on testing my thoughts against reality

Recent one: older women (which to me means 30-40) eat up direct approaches. Younger women (to me means below 29) prefer indirect. I don't KNOW this for a fact. It's a pattern I think that I've recognized based on reading what someone else has said while thinking of my own experiences

Another one: even if they're just meandering around I should only approach women who are somewhat dressed up and I can find something I like about their outfit

I don't see many women at the park that aren't in yoga pants. But the ones that aren't could be more open to an approach. I plan on testing this out as well since I've noticed that pattern

Hope this makes sense

Answer. Wanna know why I really am enjoy Kvothe's, Bacchus, Skills, Lobo, really any gamer who does this one thing???

Links.

That small effort showcases they didn't accept their first inclinations without exploration and really trying to nail it down.

Everything you run into infield or with game has been written about 1 million billion times sometimes with with different terminology but the same concept essentially.

Example.

AFC = PUA Lingo

Beta = Redpill Lingo

Normie = Nerd Lingo

May or may not be right but you get the point right? But gradually start finding the lingo for what you are looking to accomplish and or who you are trying to communicate with and you'll be in great shape for many reasons that are off topic rn, but lmk if you're interested.

but anyway let's use something you wrote as an example of examining and refining.

Here's brief examples and imagine this is you looking at this (preface that everything you think and have written has been talked about and explored a bajillion times. Keep searching for where. It's way easy now with google.)

1.


Hypothetical Regal: Hmm quite the reaction

Maybe I should look into dealing with failure.

Teevster's momentum and did the game drop me article might be good

*You search it see what you find*

Hypothetical Regal: Oh this TRE CBT thing looks cool...

TRE I plan on trying in a safer environment once I get some shit handled. But I am unsure about CBT. Could you explain what it means to you so I'm not misinterpreting?

*couple hours later*

Hypothetical Regal: Oh wow I really do run into that problem quite a bit...what a nifty solution. NOICE!

Pretty much my entire YouTube and Google search history right now: get numbers but not dates

Seeing lots of stuff about:
1) making it man to woman through projecting intent
2) more sexual tension
3) pressure (through things like eye contact)

Currently working on it

Earlier on in the thread I noted that I wanted to work on a few other things that I've worked on:
1) compliance -- better
2) qualifying -- very happy with
3) anchoring -- had too much to focus on and plan on working on this in the future

Hope that clears up my position

2.


Hypothetical Regal: Some sketchy decision making near the end. Seemed to be going well...

Could I have made her watch some of my stuff really quickly as compliance?... hmm

Let's focus on my decisions

*Google search*

Oh shit Teevster has an excellent article series on calibration and decision making. WOW.

*Couple Hours Later*


Hypothetical Regal: HMM this is important

She's arguing with her roommate which could most definitely drop state, plus she might be slightly drunk with a stranger to her roommate...

That's random...maybe I should look up dealing with random things. Could I have pulled her somewhere else that nullified this risk? Did I know she had a roommate?

*Google search*

Oh shit Teevster has an awesome series on wildcards and logistics

Skills also talks about screening and Chase has some cool tips to prevent these things

WOWOWOW.



Hypothetical Regal: Idk what keys are...

*Google search with girlschase*

WOW that's a lot of people writing about this! Must be useful or something.

Also I'm a little unsure of the windows thing.

*Google search*

Oh shit articles on buying temp, escalation windows, and signs of horniness

Plus someone escalation tips

WOWOWOWOW.

(Mist: Also not sure if that fractionation was useful or not...from my understanding at high temp you are allowed to break some rules move faster. In fact she wants it, but while building/sustaining fractionation is potent. Weird decision imo but back to Hypothetical you.)

Hypothetical Regal: I wonder why she resisted the pull? Was I overeager and jumped too early with buying temp...was it token resistance....could I have plough.

She didn't resist the pull, which is on me for not being specific in my whininess

We were walking out, and she said she had to pay her tab (I'm a bar idiot and didn't even realize she still needed too do this lmao)

Then she came back with another beer. Think it was just a whimsical thought on her part (I would like another) and so she got one

I could've gone up to the bar with her (and I did the next time) to exert social pressure on her -- hey, sitting in this bar is starting to make my joints ache, let's go walk around (in the same direction that you said you lived in what a coincidence lmao)

The joints aching, let's walk a bit was the pull excuse. I just chose the direction she said she lived and she followed me as I started walking

But yeah, I know where I messed up there and corrected it afterwards

Was she bored, scared, needed more comfort? What was the resistance?

In this case, the resistance was an impulsive thought of 'maor beeeeeer' lol

*Google search*

WOWOW

Tons of articles on persistence and resistance.

I really like Teevster's.

(Mist: Ok at this point I sent you can see I'm pretty bad at writing hypothetical you on this journey to breakdown the interaction haha.

All good, I understand you're trying to help and I greatly appreciate it. I hope this helps you understand more of the situation because I was extremely brief and didn't expect anyone to want to hone in on it more

Hope this also helps you to help me better understand your position (which, again is probably cuz I was so brief I'm assuming)

3.


Ok no more hypothetical you.

I challenge you to make this real.

What happened here? What rubric are you using? What are you going to search in relation to this?

Kinda answered this above already, but in case you want to look specifically for this part

It's still: lots of numbers, few dates in day game related inquiries


I'm also changing the way I view a day game success. Mostly because this is how I changed my view on online and saw better results from it:

The point of online dating is to get a date, not to get laid

The point of daygame is to get a date, not to get laid

The point of a date is to get laid

Basically the same concept of sales and copywriting. The point of the article title is not to get a sale. It's to get them to read the first sentence and etc.

Are you interested in target selection/easier vs harder sets, better open-hooks, fundamentals, Vibing and meeting smoother?

Not sure if you're asking this as an isolated question or a kind of follow-up, so I'll answer it as an isolated question

Right now I'm interested in hooking hard enough to make them want to see me again

But something tells me that's not specifically where im going wrong. I just need to keep testing things until I figure out which part I am fucking up in

This is all for you though. Maybe if she’s responsive you’ll get her based off what you know now, but this analysis is for macro level success. Not an excuse for oneitis…far from it

She's still texting me rather enthusiastically. But we'll see on Tuesday if it's going to matter or not

Might not get it from her, but you’ll get it from somewhere and your XP with her will have helped. (Stole that from Ricardus movie reviews while doing exactly what I am telling you.

Figure it out


LOOK AT ME-LOOK AT ME

You are the captain now

Again, I appreciate the lengthy reply. As I mentioned up above I had to think about it for a few days.

 

[Regal Tiger]

@Regal Tiger I know the feeling. I feel like I'm not good enough for the really hot chicks. When I get out of my head and approach anyway I surprise myself when they're interested.

I think it's a lack of confidence and self belief. Even with past success with incredibly hot chicks I still have self doubt. I'm working on it.

Warrior

This isn't 100% it. I think for me it's quite a bit worse

Like life in general worse that leaks out into my interactions with women (but isn't about the women themselves) :/

Just something to work on is all

 

[Regal Tiger]

You can't extrapolate your results from online and apply it to daygame. They are two completely different beasts. You have to understand that girls you meet during the day aren't asking to meet a man so there's going to be a lot of variance in your results.

Once you get your approach and conversation game down pat, you will be able to meet and hook girls but then you'll run into intermediate problems where girls will waste your time or will LJBF you because again, they're not necessary looking to date.

Sadly I'm already getting that now lol :'(

Luckily time wasters piss me off so I usually end up blocking them and moving on quickly. Shit seriously irritates me. Like girl, you know what this boat is about so you can leave

I wouldn't rely exclusively on daygame ( even though I do, lol) because it won't generate the level of results you can get from night or online game. Ideally, you can get easy girls from online and supplement with nightgame to build momentum, and then carry it with you to succeed during the day.

Sadly I have to

I don't have any other options

 

[Regal Tiger]

Currently going back to the drawing boards. Reading some articles (genuine interest dynamite article for starters) and will try to refine my approach from the beginning. Let's see how this goes once my notes are compiled

 

[YS.]

Hey RT,

1. I can bet my whole life you have a Investment & Qualification problem. Most likely the girls aren't investing at all to the conversation/relationship, they have no idea why you like them and they have no idea why they like you beyond "you're cool in the moment." Most likely you're carrying the conversations and interactions. Also most likely your investment is leaking all over you. (Wanting it too much.) You're also probably getting very flakey numbers without properly qualifying the numbers.
   
   Read this:
   
   

   Advanced Technique - How to Never Get Flaked Again - A Guide to Investment and Qualification

   I straight up got nothing but flakes for about 8 months straight. I was going mad. What the fuck was wrong? I was doing everything right. All the infields looked exactly like my sets. There was ALMOST nothing that really went in depth about this. Just crumbs and incomplete theories. A...

   www.skilledseducer.com
   
   Compare to what you're doing. It'll fix your issues.
   
   
   
2. Saying this with LOVE. LOTS OF LOVE.
   
   You rant a lot without any emphasis on potential fuck ups or problems.
   
   I've read a few of your experiences but there is little to none self analysis, quite the opposite in fact. Oh man, she was so into me, it fucked up. I'm so pissed. Well.. what happened? Did you overqualify? Did you take too much time so her state went down? Did you leak neediness after some point? Did you at any point shown her beyond doubt "you're not that guy"?
   
   Even if you don't know what happened, what potentially happened? You need to be able to see your issues.
   
   Case in point:
   
   Spoiler: True Story

   I had a girl who was SUPER into me. I felt overly entitled to her because she wasn't as pretty as the girls I've been with. She was super "nice". So I treated her very nice. I paid for her food. I wasn't on point, I was overly entitled to her in a bad / needy way. Wasn't fun whatsoever. Qualified myself a lot to show to her why I deserved her. (LOL) We went out to a club with a bunch of randoms. I, without doing anything, wanted her to be with me, give me validation, all the fucking time. She got increasingly colder. I could feel it slipping which made me all the more desperate. She met the most loser guy of all time. Balding, short, skinny, jobless traveling asshole came to the club with 3 other dudes lol. In 2 hours they were fucking. She was ready, I just wasn't the guy. I fucked up. I shouldn't have been so entitled. (Big problem I had with not so hot girls, trying to overstep the process.) Had freedom from outcome. Be free from her validation or the results of that night. Wouldn't invest so fucking hard from minute 0 thinking it was a given. Gave her room to invest. Sit back more. Etc...
   
   
   Do you see how that is so different from "oh my God she was completely into me, we kissed and hung around for hours, she wanted to fuck me but then she fucked someone else, woe is me". BTW, a completely accurate description of what happened also but not very helpful.
   
   I would try to NEVER write anything negative unless it comes with a potential sticking point IDENTIFIED and a potential SOLUTION in mind.
   
   
   
3. Your obsession with numbers I believe is very counterproductive and most likely contributes a lot to your neediness, overt investment. You want it to happen. You want a bigger batting average. Numbers are good if you can look at it not emotionally, to identify sticking points and potential solution. Looking at numbers unemotionally is almost impossible at something like game I feel so most of the time it's completely counter productive in most scenarios.
   
   Most likely you need to get fewer #s to have more dates. A more highly qualified and invested number will almost always convert into a date but you'll be losing more numbers in the process. You're probably getting a lot of "here's my #" rejections that you think are flaking.
   
   They are not flaking, they are rejecting you but giving you the number is the most frictionless way of doing so.
   
   When my game got better I got way less numbers because I'd run a lot of qualification and investment. If the girls wouldn't qualify or invest in person, that number would be meaningless anyway. Home run hitters almost always have lower batting averages than slap hitters. Keep that in mind.
   
   
   
4. It's 2022. Getting #s instead of IG is a very big dishonest signal in this day and age which you need to heavily compensate. I'd look anyone weird if they wanted my number instead of my social media.

Food for thought.

Be positive.

Much love!