Well approach anxiety is when you fear approaching good looking women in general, this is moreso based on approaching good looking women who you find hot but remind you of women you have had bad experiences with.
@DML is correct, this is approach anxiety
Now when I see a girl that happens to be hot, is my type, but looks a lot like women I have had bad experiences with not just on a seduction level but on a social level (being mean to me, being rude, cold, usually going for men who look nothing like me and making it clear they are not interested), I go into analysis paralysis almost. A mindfuck happens where my thoughts get bitter, defensive, and I automatically go into finding every way to find a flaw in her and go out of my way to not approach almost even though deep down I want to.
Even the few times I do approach, I am really so off mentally that it's almost like it turns into a self-fulfilling prophecy but I feel anchored by my past too. I also do not have any good references or observations to build on either.
I almost feel like I would have to overcompensate or something to get her so I avoid approaching altogether even though I may want to. I know my situation is real unique but anyone ever been there mentally?
No matter how many times you say it and how hard you believe it, your situations is NOT unique. It's approach anxiety for YOUR personal "type".
You have a choice to make here:
- continue to rationalize that your situation is unique and no one else understands as they haven't been through it (even though several of us have)
- Or you could stop theorizing about it, man up and take ACTION. Then if you want feedback report what actually happened in those interactions. Like it or not, you will be just like a newbie with this "type" of yours.
I can tell you that one of things women admire the most about ACTION-OREINTED MEN is that they take action DESPITE the overwhelming fear that they feel. THAT is also one of the main reason why most guys fail with women, because they rationalize not taking action and women sense that = unattractive.