A Hunter's Journey

[Beck Bass]

Hiya boyos,

I'm here to tell you my story, part of it, at least.

I'm some nerdy kid from Braziland and growing up I would devour any books I could get my hands on, as I found them much more interesting than the other kids (joke, I was actually scared of people and felt awkward most of the time). Being quite shy, I found it difficult to make new friends, but people were often friendly with me as I was quite a nice kid and had good grades.

When I was like ten, I was really religious, and this, combined with the fact that I was some horny porn-loving motherfucker (God bless Sasha Grey), made me quite conflicted. To make things worse, I studied in some military school from middle to high school where holding a girl's hand (let alone kissing or doing anything more sexual) was a good enough reason to send your parents a note about what happened and make you lose points that eventually could get you get spelled. I was poor and this school was one of the few good public schools in the city (in the country to be pretty honest), but of course this was probably one of the worst places to grow out of my shyness and learn naturally about girls.

Needless to say, I never did anything close to kissing a girl there as I was totally scared about that fucking up my future or whatever. That said, girls would often show some interest in me, which most of the time I had no fucking idea how to react to (I would say I have a handsome face and a nice body, height, at least, and me being nice would put many girls on ease around me, though my lack of social skills would creep other out lol). At least that attention I would get from these girls would show me I could be desired and would drive my quest later on, ala Chase, dare I say.

Going into university, I chose to study computer engeneering, which, as you might expect or know, doesn't really put you in a position were you see and interact with many girls, let alone attractive girls (nothing against my fellow geeks, I believe women deserve more space and recognition in computing but c'mon). That said, in the first university party I managed, being quite drunk myself, to kiss some drunk friend of a friend, which then proceeded to vomit like crazy lol. There was some hope for me, after all.

I believe I then found Girls Chase while searching for some guide on how to text a girl, which I absolutelly had never done before that (to get a date, at least). I go out with her and our date is terrible as we are now sober and I am me, but within some months I start to really get into game and read Girls Chase quite frequently.

In the last five years, I've tried to go out frequently and practice game, putting to the test many of the things I read on Chase's, Hector's and some other dudes' articles. I've approached hundreds of women (and got approached by quite a few cuties as well, thanks to my improved fundamentals and getting out there), kissing more than a hundred girls, getting sexual with many of them and sleeping with some. Living with my parents sure did fuck up many opportunities to get sex, but I now have enough money that I can pay for a room for a girl or two a month and I'm saving up to move out asap.

That said, I did get blowjobs in dirty bathrooms, fucked and fingered girls in crazy places, and overall had a pretty good time with them over this years, for which I'm very grateful.

Below I'm gonna try and sum up what those years felt like.

 

[Beck Bass]

PRELUDE: SCHOOL (A.K.A. ESCAPING FROM HELL)

Just playing, school wasn't that bad lol (yes it was).

As I told you above, I was there because I needed to be there, basically.
Being a shy student while some dude carrying a gun is watching kids so they don't do anything stupid or violent or romantic/sexual is not exactly pleasing, but it sure makes things more exciting. Too bad I was like reaaaally slow at that time, I had no idea what girls were like. I remember some of them making sexual comments around me like "oh guys are only good for their dicks" and me being like, "woah, this girl is rude" (someone please get me a time machine so I can punch myself kek).
Girls would show some interest in me, like I had friends that were twin sisters and they would come up to mock me (joking, of course) in the interval about me pronouncing clitoris wrong in science class, along with their cute friend from the other class. Thinking back, I could have had a ton of fun back then, if only I was a bit less shy and insecure. Some older girl once told me I was gonna be really hot when I got older (guess she was right haha).

I was a really perverted, horny kid. I sat on the left specifically 'cause I could see the bras of the girls through their button-up uniform t-shirts. I remember us talking about masturbation in the library, and when they asked how often I masturbated I said like "once a week" (when I was totally jacking off every fucking day). I had this really sexual, perverted teen mind but on the outside I was just this really nice, assexual kid. Again, all of this goes back to the conflict between my religion and my actual desires and the fact that I studied there and was a poor kid that needed to stay calm until I was out of there.

I was always crushing hard over some girl (like one per year, the one I found the hottest in the class, of course), but I never said anything or even consciously showed that, until the last year of middle school. I was 13 I think, and I lost both of my grandpas that year. They were both very present in my life, so I suffered a lot. On top of that, there were a bunch of people talking about leaving that school to study on other places to prepare for the tests we have to take to get into university in Braziland, so I was afraid I was never gonna see that girl again.

That girl was some cute asian chick with a really nice, round butt (I'm most deff an ass man you know). It was her birthday and some of her friends were going to make a party, and I was like totally crazy nuts with everything that was going on. I was blinded, I was tired of never showing my feelings and it was starting to tax me too much on the inside, like I needed to get it out. So I just went I bought two roses, some chocolate (all with my parents money and approval, thanks for not stopping me lol) and wrote her some love letter. I remember it just saying I love her and how fucking awesome she was, how intellegent and beautiful and all that stupid jazz that some nerdy kid idealizes in a woman. Of course I barely knew her, I had only spoken with her once or twice, so it was like the most bizarre thing ever.

I went in front of everyone and gave it to her. I remember being barely able to move, like when I was trapped in my nightmares. I was feeling like I was gonna die and my face was probably all red and shit. I've experienced some strong stuff, like I almost died a few times and I don't think I felt as bad as I felt that day, like it probably was like the biggest shock I felt in my life. All the girls were like "oh he's so cuute" and stuff like that, some of the dudes congratulated me for having the balls, some were like "wtf" (I would be like to be honest), she didn't know what the fuck to do, and me neither. She just gave me a hug, which I made completely awkward, and that was it.

After that, she asked for my instant messager handle (back then on the MSN days) and said we could be "friends", which I already was like, oh god, I'm fucked, because the friendzone memes back than were really strong. We started texting, but I was fucking terrified of talking to her, so I would just spam her with the most boring conversation ever, like talking about video games when she didn't even played any. It was bizarre. Eventually her friends would just be kinda mean to me and my friends and she was kinda just ignoring my existence. So I decided to move on and tried to ignore her as well, which funniely enough made her seem kinda interested in me out of the blue, but I really couldn't do anything out of it because not only I still had no idea what I was doing with girls but also I barely could talk to her, because of her nervous I would get.

Fast forward to the start of high school, we still in the same class, but for whatever reason other girls started showing interest in me quite strongly (maybe some weird preselection of her and her friends looking at me remembering all the weird shit that went on?). I remember I was reading a manga called Love Hina at the time, and the main character was some awkward loser that would get in those nonsense situations with girls because he was so clumsy. I don't know if it was accidentally or I was legit trying to copy him, but I remember touching girls in the most idiotic ways "accidentally" in class (I almost got in trouble once because the sarge saw me doing some stupid play with a girl but whatever). Suddenly I was spending my intervals with a group of cute girls instead of my usual nerdy companions.

There was this girl that would hold hands with me and get me hard just doing that and talking to me in classes in other places and in the intervals (I never even kissed her but we had some sort of weird teeny relationship). I remember two of her friends taking a pic of me, both kissing me in the cheeks, one on each (and her getting fucking mad at me when she saw it lol, I wish I had that pic now). One time I was sat at the interval and there were like 6 or seven girl around me, no joke, the nerdiest creepy kid in the class just told me "dude, you're a fucking boss", and that's how I felt lol. Good times after that weird shit. Meanwhile asian chick would show my love letter to people from time to time just to show off, which I was a bit flattened at first but just disgusted afterwards. I do wish her the best nowadays, but back then she made me really miserable (even if it was all my fault).

At the end of high school I still hadn't kissed any girl or got really sexual. I did made some dope friends that lived on the trap life and made me get over my stupid religion hung over thing though. One of them was this new student, asian dude, that I approached in my shy way and asked if he wanted to spend the interval with me and my friend (I could at least approach dudes now kek). On my prom, I danced with some cute girl, my mom watched it on the video and was like, "wow, is that really you?". I could have kissed her, but her breath was reeeal bad haha, I didn't feel like it.

 

[Beck Bass]

CHAPTER 1: THE START (A.K.A. DUTCH COURAGE TO FAKE IT UNTIL YOU MAKE IT)

So, leaving school, I chose to study Computer Engineering (worst decision), at university.
Due to some previous public education workers' strike, my classes only would start well after half a year after I finished school.
So I just played stupid games like DotA on Garena 24/7 since that was all I did on my free time (other than playing bass). I looked like a fucking homeless person during this period, except the lack of much facial hair lmao

Then uni starts, and -surprise surprise- there's like 3 girls in my class, none of them really attractive, to me at least (one of them looked ok, but she put up a lot of weight during university, tbh, I did too, engineering and IT combined in a course really doesn't do much for your physical health). One of the dudes in my class was someone I studied with in school, girls didn't like him much for being a bit of an asshole, he was fun though. At first I was like "I reeeally didn't want to see anyone from school here", but it was nice to have someone known. There was also a friend of my asian friend from school and some other dude that loved dark humor (nowadays I only really talk to him), and we kinda packed together.

First semester was a clusterfuck, but I had programmed before and my math wasn't that bad, so I manage to pass every class, some barely. University was stressful, teachers would brag about failing lots of students (some whole classes), others would tell you to study double the time you studied at class outside of it (we studied from early in the morning until 3pm or 5pm depending on the day, those teachers were fucking deillusional). Also the place itself was terrible, all concrete near downtown, lightning was kinda gloomy, very few girls, even less attractive, as it was a mostly tech/engineering university. So not a great start really.

Second semester starts and it's even worse, we now have even more classes and teachers are even more ruthless psychopaths (one of them legit failed our whole class and would invite students to drink with him and hit on girls in class, fucking chode). Because of the whole teacher strike thing our calendar was all over the place, so classes would end around Christmas and come back with a bunch of hardcore tests already, right after vacation (needless to say I bombed in a lot of them).

Anyway, around the end of the year, there's that big uni party coming, and all of my friends are going, so I decided I would give it a shot. I already been to a uni party, but it was from the people of our course, so yeah, no girls pretty much, me and dark humor guy just got drunk on vodka (first time I got drunk in my life) and left to Jedicon to fight with giant Q-tips. This time, though, I knew there would be girls, and for whatever reason I ask my sister if I'm gonna get all the girls there (I was feeling confident for some reason, I did some stupid Buzz Feed test online for how good of a kisser I was, and it said I was a Casanova lol), and she says "not all, but probably some girl".

So I get there kinda early, and there's pretty much none there... I go around and feel the vibe of the place, I remember Arctic Monkeys songs from AM playing for whatever reason (not exactly the "party" type of song, but a good start, I suppose), I think I haven't read Girls Chase yet, but when I think of that "See the room" article, I remember this moment, maybe I knew some of this stuff instinctively, or I started reading GC way before I remember? Dunno, my memories are kinda blurry now.
The first person I knew to arrive was the friend of my asian buddy, with her girlfriend and some other girl, that I learned was her sister. This girl looked fine, to me at least, so I went and talked with them (even if she wasn't, I guess I wouldn't had cold approached any girls there, at least not initially). I grab some beer and start talking with them.

At first there's a bit of a weird vibe between me and this girl, but eventually she starts opening up to me, as we drink more and more beer. I find out she's trying to get in uni but didn't quite make the test last year, and now she did it again, but she thinks she bombed. I try and comfort her and everything, for some reason I think she's younger than me (she actually was my age lol), so I'm treating her like a little sister or something. I also remember kinda deep diving her about that and her dreams and whatnot, I think it was more like I read about it afterwards and I was like "oooh I did that before".

My other friends arrive and me and this girl are already pretty close, like we're almost a couple in our circle (I was touching her quite a bunch, not super smooth, all thanks to my light drunkness). A while after, we're talking about that night and my friend told me another guy in our group was interested in her and was "supposed" to end up with her that night (we called this guy "Max Steel" because he kinda looked like a greek god or something lol, he was blonde and tall and and this really masculine, player energy). So I guess I beat him to the punch hehe

One of our shit teachers, the worst one, that invited students to drink with him, comes up and greets our group in the middle of the party, and asks if we have been studying (like, not only we have to see this motherfucker on our day off, but he comes up with this bs convo). So I just tell him "yeah, I haven't really studied your subject because I was too busy studying the subject of that other teacher" (that other teacher was a bit of joke on how bad her classes were, and I knew he didn't like her lmao).

Anyways, eventually my friend, the boyfriend of her sister, comes up to me and says, as she's going to the bathroom "she told me she wants to make out with you", and I'm like "wuuut". It's not like I didn't expect or want this, I just didn't expect him to say that, and also I didn't knew what the fuck to do, as I never had kissed a girl before. So I just leaned against a wall, like fucking James Dean or something (again, I don't think I even knew who he was before reading GC, so maybe I read it before even kissing the first girl? I'm still confused), wearing my leather jacket and trying to look bad ass.

Surprisingly, when she came out of the bathroom, she just walked up straight to me, staring at me as I stared at her, and I could tell what would happen. As she got close, I asked her "really?", like won't you wait for me to take the action, and the she said "yeah" (in Portuguese it was the same word, like "4 reelz? 4 reelz").

We started kissing. I remember it being hot and wet, like I would have those dirty, hentai-like ridiculous thoughts like "Oh her mouth is so soft and delicious", that type of cringe shit, it was my first kiss ever, remember. Definitely a good one (other than being really drunk, but I didn't mind). I got so excited I threw my jacket away in the heat of the moment, never to be found again...
Also, a girl from my class was there, and when we started kissing, she put my hands on this girl's ass, like WTF (everyone was drunk at the party, obviously). But since then, grabbing a girl's ass became a normal part of a kiss, for me (very few girls ever objected to that, and it was like a false shocked attitude, just to pretend they are these saints, you know, but I know better, a girl agrees to exchange saliva with you but not touch her butt? lol). So thank you, my lady.

Anyway, we continue kissing and I'm really into it, and she seems to be as well, at first, but then she starts getting kinda weird. We stop frenching for a bit and I ask her if she's ok, she says that she is, so we continue. But then she gets even weirder and starts feeling kinda like she's gonna fall over herself, I ask if she's okay again, but this time, she just shakes her head, looking sick. She then goes on to vomit like crazy on a plant vase there, people tell me to hold her hair (to protect it from the vomit), and I think they meant to pull her hair, like sexually, for some reason? I'm really drunk, and completely confused with the situation lmao.

In the end I just call my friend and he takes her home with his girlfriend to take care of her. After that day, everyone in my uni class thinks I'm a stud/chad/whatever, people make like fucking memes of me and stuff like that, not knowing it was my first kiss, that I fucking stumbled upon, pretty much. I guess "among the blind, a one-eyed man is king", so the fact that I managed to kiss a girl at all at the first uni party, being part of all those nerdy guys, was a big deal, somehow. I believe I discovered Girls Chase shortly after, thought that fabled texting article, trying to get her on a date (more on the next chapter), and I'm glad I did.

 

[Beck Bass]

CHAPTER 2: MY FIRST DATE (FUCK YOU, CINEMA!)

So, after kissing this girl, I tried to ask her out, obviously. I remember the conversation being really chill overall, but I had no idea of what type of date to take a girl on, or what to do. So I just went with the classic "take a girl to the movie!" mainstream stupid date idea. We agreed to meet at some mall and see some stupid super hero movie together (I was never really a fan of Marvel, DC, or what-have-you, to me those mainstream comics were really meeeh, but she was the one suggesting it so...).

Now, I hope I don't have to tell you that, but movies are probably the worst type of date you can take a girl on (specially if you're unexperienced and is trying to get to know this girl). You get into a place where there's like zero chance for conversation and physical escalation (unless you wanna miss out on the movie), so unless you're already boning this girl, chances are you won't even touch her in the movie theater (you can try to put your arms around her and that weird type of stuff, but let's be real, it's unconfortable, sitting side-by-side does nothing to help you). Even if it's already on and you're trying to get naughty, the theater might be packed, there might be annoying people around you, and so on.
To top all of that, I don't even like watching movies there (I rather do it at home chilling, Netflix wasn't even a thing back then and I already knew that), the only movies I enjoyed seeing in the cinema were the ones from the Batman's Dark Knight trilogy (who wouldn't want to bone that Catwoman, huh?), with my highschool best friends (we would buy candies and other stuff to eat before the movie in stores at the mall and put in our backpacks to eat there lol, way cheaper).
Another thing to consider about movie theaters, and other "passive" types of entertainment, is that it's really bad for the pace of your game. Let me explain: you, as the man, have to be leading, taking initiative, making stuff happen, but then you sit and watch something for one or two hours straight. What happens then? The natural feeling that comes is for you to continue to be passive, to just watch and not take action. You have to get yourself again in the mood of doing stuff, taking action, and that requires a lot more effort, than if you were doing that before. It' just inertia. So naturally those type of dates just suck (you can, of course, be trying to get sexual with the girl during the movie, but then what's the point of paying to see that? Just to get her in a dark room for her to feel more confortable? Is that even a thing? lol).

Anyway, we get to the movie, see it, I spent almost two hours not talking to her or touching her at all, so yeah, it's just awkward and bad after that. We go eat at the Subway there, and I got to tell you, back then I could be very judgemental. This girl doesn't have the quite the best manners. Nowadays I realize how much of a woosy I sound like saying that type of stuff, but back then my family was really uptight and I was a really judgemental person. Another thing that bothers me big time is that she just leaves all her fucking trash over the table and like "ok, let's leave". To this day I'm like, why? The trash can was like on our side, just get up your lazy ass and throw you shit there, what's the big deal? But maybe she was actting weird because she was nervous, which I totally understand, I wasn't helping or leading at all.

So when we leave, she holds my hand. We haven't even touched before, and she's the one initiating it. I was kinda mad at her but happy that she seemed to like me. I walk her to take her bus/Uber/can't remember, as we are waiting, I can feel the pressure pilling up. She held my hand, and seemed like she was waiting for something. I knew I should kiss her, but I can't find the courage to do it. The only kiss I had before was with her, and we were both so drunk...
So I just do nothing, and she leaves. And I wanna kick myself in the nuts or something.

I get home and text her, telling I wanted to kiss her but didn't find the courage to do so, which doesn't do me any favors.
We talk a bit but then things just die off. We see each other again at a party my friend was throwing, I'm drunk again and I try to kiss her, but she wants nothing to do with me (her mom was there, dunno if that had something to do with it, but I know I fucked up big time on our date). We see each other again a few times on outings with this friend of mine, it's awkward, but whatever.

 

[Beck Bass]

CHAPTER 3: AT A SNAIL'S PACE (BUT STILL WALKING...)

This all happened in the end of my first year in uni, and after that I take a break from girls, for the most part. I still crush hard on like one girl for semester, the cutest one on my classes (I end up sleeping with one of them years later), but ultimately do nothing about it. There was one girl I approached in another uni party, super drunk, and she just dodged me, like I was an obstacle or something. Things get weird at class, I try apologizing to her before one, but it gets even weirder. I think I saw her on the street the other day and she smiled at me. Maybe now she wants some? And maybe she wanted back then, I just fucked up big time.

Anyway, there was this one girl I went out with in the middle of the year. My black friend from high school (me, him and asian guy were like a power trio back then) went with me and asian friend's brother to some crazy party, I believe after we graduated from school, but before we got to uni. We get there and there's an old lady stamping people at the entrance, the price to enter is like a beer lol, we look inside there's a bunch of underage kids inside a building under construction, that "funk" from Rio (like a worse Trap that girls twerk to) blasting at the loudest volume.

We enter and meet this friend of our asian friend's bro (which is younger than us, btw), she's with some asian girl dancing seductively and looking at me, I'm like, dude, I'm gonna get in trouble here, this guy is also paying for our beer at the moment lol
I walk around and see teenagers making out and going crazy everywhere, there's some big concrete stairs with no protection, I can tell some drunk kid is gonna fall later on, for sure. We were also with two girls, and they look terrified lmao

The four of us (me, black guy and girls) can't find asian bro, so we just decide to leave, because clearly were not that much into that trap life quite yet. My dad gives us a ride (he was working and left at the middle, he's a great father, for sure) and the girls also go home.

Anyway, back to the present (past), black friend is visiting me and using my Facebook, he goes stalk this girl on my FB and just friends her (I had no idea what her name was, but this friend of mine was specially thirsty at times lol). So one day, I'm playing League of Virgins and this girl messages me, like 2am of Saturday, saying "hi". I answer her, an hour later (because I was playing, not because I was being gamey or not trying to appear thirsty), and we start talking.

Now, I must have messaged this girl for like more than two fucking months. I don't know how the fuck I could do that back then, but I did. I remember she would reffer to herself as the "pretty from civil (engineering)", and she would say other chase frame-esque stuff that would make me laugh my ass off. I remember I could be quite eloquent with my texting back then, telling her to go to "sleep with Morpheus", and stuff like that.

So I'm trying to get this girl out on a date. Even though my last date was a disaster, I was reading Girls Chase then, and I knew I had to keep on practicing, and this girl basically approached me, so she was my best shot, at the time (I'm not really approaching any girls, as I was scared as shit, broke as fuck, and going crazy with uni). I take more than two months, but eventually she accepts to go out with me (I reeeally persisted big time with this girl). I remember she gave me some lame excuses such as "I have to watch Brazil's game at the (Soccer) World Cup" (it was 2014).

We were going out to a mall, to see a movie, again (I guess I can be a dumdumb sometimes). I believe we were supposed to meet at 3pm or something, so I get there, a bit ahead of time (I was really punctual back then, not anymore). And wait. And wait.

It's almost 4pm and I decide, you know what, fuck this girl, I don't wanna see her face ever again, and I just leave. As leaving the mall, she starts calling me. I answer, kinda holding myself to not say some fucked up shit to her, and she's telling me she's very sorry, that her mom was giving her a ride but she was really late, so there was nothing she could do (I can't remember if she texted me she would be late, I don't think this late, anyways).

I stop a bit and I think, you know what, I'm here, she's here, I'm in a fucking shit mood, but I might as well give it a try.

So I go back and meet her.

She's looking super cute in a sweater, some tight jeans and little boots, I believe (it's been more than 6 years so don't take my word for it lol). She's a short blonde with green eyes, I think, not exactly my type, but a pretty cute girl (I know a lot of guys would kill to be on a date with her, my black friend got super jelly when he knew I went out with her). The only thing kinda off about her is her nose piercing, which I personally really don't like (nowadays I don't mind as much, but back then I really was put off by small earrings, piercings and that type of stuff, I think it made me think about how painful it must be to have your body pierced or something, real weird. I still don't like it those that much, I guess it's a personal preference, but interestingly I find those big ring type of earrings super sexy for some reason, I feel very different about them. Go figure). So that and the fact that she was so late and that put me on a shit mood made it really difficult to have a good time with her.

I remember she was super sweet and understanding (on FB, she was totally nuts, she posted on my profile some happy face emoji or something, like you would go into it and the first thing was her post lol), which made me even more divided. Here was this girl, that got me really mad for being late (I was way more uptight back then, as I said), and had this piercing I disliked, but other than that was a total sweet cutey. Those were some real weird feelings to deal with.

So, we saw the movie, and again, it was fucking stupid, I didn't get to talk to her or touch her at all, and the vibe after that was real off. We then went for some milkshakes (I told her I rather not eat something because of my braces, I was really conscious of it, and it made my self steem and dating life suffer until I got rid of them, for sure). I remember she barely managed to finish hers, a smaller one, and I finished mine, a bigger one, but after that I was like almost throwing up or something, it was really dumb to got for so much when I just wanted an excuse to walk around and talk to her.

We talked a bit and I remember feeling like I really wanted to kiss this girl, but at the same time feeling like I wouldn't be able to in the shit mood I was in. The night came, and she was going to take the bus to her home, so I took her to her bus stop and we waited there. It was this really sad vibe, I couldn't summon the courage to do anything bolder, and she seemed to be feeling weird. In the end, she gave me a close hug, I kissed her cheek and she left, never to be seem again.

Again, I felt like shit, and I wanted to hang myself or something. To be honest, I still feel bad for what happened, to this day.

 

[Nicko]

Hey bro, i understand everyone has a shit past at some point. Its good to reflect on the pass to learn our lessons on where it went wrong.

But we all should focus on the present and improve from there and be optimistic.

Have you started cold approaching yet? If you haven't you should. It will help build ur abundance mindset

I don't have any decent advice to help you but Girl Chase is not only a site for getting good with girls but life in general it should help you progress to ur fullest potential.

-----
To start off with for you to be come ur best version of your self is to change ur mindset and ur internal beliefs as well as fueling ur sub consciousness with ur desired out comes.

For 2 reasons

1: your subconscious will re-wire your brain to start believing that this is the authentic you and ur body language will adjust to it while guiding you to your goal . But affirmation is not enough, you need actions to help further making ur brain believe what you are doing aligns with what you want to become.

Ex. I was sorta had very little friends(toxic friends) i wanted to devop better social skills. While i had the internal belief that i wont be able to. The internal belief(sub conscious) from previous experiences clashed with my goals. So i fought them by pushing my comfort zones to make friends. I forced my self out there to learn and socialize and believing in that it was possible.

This is like seduction. When ur thinking its going to fail ur sub consciousness is going to guide to failure. When u think its Going to workout ur subconscious is going to so what it can to guide you.

However believeing in ur self is attractive is fine and it works... Though its not enough to simply bed a girl if you don't have the tools or experience(with enough you can let auto-pilot do the work).

Its like a average joe at a NBA court shooting a half court just by believing he can shoot it in. Sure the subconscious is going to help but he doesn't have the practice or skills to shoot it in.

2. Results and goals come from the mindset as well as actions . If ur going to think like a little bitch ur going to act little bitch.

If u want to be successful ur going to think how to be successful and find what you can do to make it happen

Ur mindset can effect ur emotional state just by thinking differently and our actions. i. E being optimistic would put you in a better mood and to further push in the directions to make feel better

The mindset of mine is self oriented and optomistic . I want to grow and get stronger. I want to keep pushing my comfort zone to be better and ect. You need to learn how to improve constantly.

 

[Beck Bass]

Have you started cold approaching yet? If you haven't you should.

Actually I approached more than a 100 girls already hehe, I didn't get to that part yet, I was trying to document my journey as a seducer from the start and see what I can remember about it (suprisingly, almost everything, safe for a few minor details).
But I've been meaning to ask you, how did you get started on daygame?
All of my approaches and game came from night game, pretty much (parties, clubs, bars, and so on), but with Corona, I've been pretty much out of game for last year. I tried Tinder (I slept with two girls from it before, but they weren't quite the quality I'm used to), but it's pretty garbage, for the most part.
I really wanna translate my night game into daygame, but I feel really weird everytime I try to go and approach during the day, like I don't know what I'm doing, that I'm gonna come in too strong, and so on... That said, I feel some sort of excitement when I see a cute girl, like I almost go and approach, but somehow I stop myself for whatever reason. Maybe I just need to try more and get more exposure?

But we all should focus on the present and improve from there and be optimistic.

Oh yeah, a 100%, I'm glad I found Girls Chase and took control over my life. I'm a 100% a different, improved person now.
I'm optimistic, I don't fear bad stuff is gonna happen (because I feel like I'm gonna be able to handle whatever comes).

 

[Nicko]

but I feel really weird everytime I try to go and approach during the day, like I don't know what I'm doing, that I'm gonna come in too strong, and so on... That said, I feel some osrt of excitement when I see a cute girl, like I almost go and approach, but somehow I stop myself for whatever reason. Maybe I just need to try more and get more exposure?

Lol funny thing is that i purely run day game im still relatively new. So i dont have the feels to the night game yet lol(im a teen lmao so can't run that shit). I had AA before when i started day game but you should easily by pass it after all you did run night game and with 100+ approaches lol.

Same deal with how you wold open and close but careful of throwing negs in day game they aren't necessary and beware of throwing too much sexual framing from the start, subtle will do as its day lol and its a whole different vibe or depends on ur style.

Group sets, mixed sets stuff can be doable but i haven't tried it so u'll have to ask around

All u need to remember is calibrate to the girl and you would be fine.

Oh yeah, a 100%, I'm glad I found Girls Chase and took control over my life. I'm a 100% a different, improved person now.
I'm optimistic, I don't fear bad stuff is gonna happen (because I feel like I'm gonna be able to handle whatever comes).

Nice. I didn't catch on ur writing all the way from the past oops my mistake lol.

 

[Beck Bass]

careful of throwing negs

Hehe I don't really like negs, for the most part, my game is pretty similar to @Hector Papi Castillo 's, I believe, just going strong, showing interest really directly and handling the reaction from the girl.

too much sexual framing from the start, subtle will do as its day lol

Yeah, I think that might be my biggest struggle, though I know Hector is big in daygame as well... I would love to have like a coaching session with him, but my poor ass from Brazil can't afford it (an hour is like what I make in a month lol).

I didn't catch on ur writing all the way from the past oops my mistake lol.

No biggie, I don't know if journals were supposed to used like that anyway, but I figured I would start from the start and then get to the present (I haven't been approaching much, saddly, but I wanna change that).

 

[Nicko]

Hehe I don't really like negs, for the most part, my game is pretty similar to @Hector Papi Castillo 's, I believe, just going strong, showing interest really directly and handling the reaction from the girl.


Yeah, I think that might be my biggest struggle, though I know Hector is big in daygame as well... I would love to have like a coaching session with him, but my poor ass from Brazil can't afford it (an hour is like what I make in a month lol).


No biggie, I don't know if journals were supposed to used like that anyway, but I figured I would start from the start and then get to the present (I haven't been approaching much, saddly, but I wanna change that).

ill be looking forward to the next chapter


You can still run indirect or direct in day Game but i doubt indirect would suit you lol

 

[Beck Bass]

ill be looking forward to the next chapter


You can still run indirect or direct in day Game but i doubt indirect would suit you lol

Yeah, I think indirect-direct would be the only exception (I think I read you used it in one of your sets, well done!)

 

[Beck Bass]

CHAPTER 4: HELLO AGAIN, FRIEND OF A FRIEND...

So after the failed date with blondie we never saw each other again. I didn't even try to get her out again because I felt really shitty for what happened (how I behaved with her, how weak I was and what not).
I was still having a shitty university life studying Computer Engineering with very few girls around.

One day this classmate wanted to setup a date with a friend of mine and a (girl)friend of hers, but my friend was like "nah".
I looked at her photos on FB and I was like, whatever, I can go out with her man lol, so he hooked us up and we started talking.

Eventually we went out, this girl wasn't quite my type, but her face was kinda cute and she had some great boobs (I'm an ass man, so I was more bummed out she didn't have a nice ass than happy she had nice tiddies, but oh well). So I wasn't thaat excited about her, but we were having a good time together (no sex, but at least I was kissing some other girl, though our kisses were kinda weird, to be fair I probably wasn't the GREAT kisser I am today lmao, but she was much shorter and for some reason she would make things really awkward between us - tbh I think she was a bad kisser lol).

I would go see her at her uni after my classes, like once or twice a week. She studied in another university that was a bit further away from my home, and I would go there to see her for like an hour or two, so I would take like double the time to get home just to see her, after a whole day (morning and afternoon) of classes. It was a bit tiring. And on top of that, I felt like we didn't quite have that chemistry that I had with the first girl I kissed, or the one I imagined I would have with fu blondie. So I was pulling away, in a sense.

After a while she just stopped replying to my messages (I think I only sent her one message though, not really that persistent with her lol), and after two weeks I was like "fuck this girl". There was some university party coming and I posted I was going on FaceBook (typical stupid teenager thing back then lol, can believe people still use this crap), and shortly after she messaged me:
You're going to that party?
Yep
Ok then, have fun

We never saw each other again lol
I could feel on that ironic smile she was fuming. But she was the one to stop replying to me, you know?
It was expected that me going in this uni party I would at least kiss some other girl, so yeah, she was mad.

So I went to this uni party with this friend whose girlfriend's sister I kissed two chapters ago, I believe she was with her new boyfriend, my friend's brother lmao. I was in a bad mood, and while I was in line waiting to enter, some water pipe in the entrance broke in my face, pretty much, and I got soaked. Not a great start lmao
I remember drinking too much, feeling like shit there. I was almost passing out below some staircase and that delicious misture of beer and dirt from the ground was dripping in head, as I was almost ready to vomit. On top of that, I saw the blondie from one of my classes in uni there with some other big guy, and me there, on this absolute apex of existence.
Btw I had approached some other girl from another course (civil engineering) that was taking Calculus with us, she wouldn't stop looking at me and my friends during class (I think it was because one of my friends just talked too loud), and she was my type, so I figured, let's go baby.
I walked up to her and said those exact words (being pretty drunk and sloppy, my clothes still messy):
"I know what you want ;D" (this phrase sorta became a meme between my close friends, like best pick up line ever lmao)
As expected, she treated me like a fucking light post or something coming in her direction and dodged me, just walking to the side. Her hot friend was there with her boyfriend, this guy was like verrry tall, I'm 6'0'', but this guy made me feel small lol

After the party, I went to my friend's house. We had eaten some roasted rib in some low life bohemian place where people would eat such popular delicacies and hookers would find clientele (I swear I saw one of the most beautiful girls I have ever seen there, maybe not quite as beautiful as just hot, and I was still a bit drunk, but seriously, this hooker looked my age and looked like a goddess in her tigress shorts, like tigress "print"? she also of course eye fucked me and gave me some hard IOIs, I was like daaaamn). When I got there, I barfed on his grass, like hard (his dog ate everything lmao). Absolutely disgusting. Next day I remember going home still feeling like shit with some bad hangover and smelling terrible, I left as soon as I woke up to not disturb anyone. I got home and had to hear a lot of shit from my mom and, of course, I barfed more in my bathroom...

Anyways, afterwards, the girl I was seeing (or more like wasn't seeing for more than two weeks now) texted me saying she wanted a boyfriend, yadayada, I was like, seriously? You stop replying me for two weeks, to then get mad at me for going into some uni party, to then saying you want me as your boyfriend? (I didn't say any of this to her, though, now I think maybe I should have, honestly).
I think I said, I'm sorry, but nooope, something like that. I was mad at her, and I think before that I kinda talked about sex and she suggested she would only sleep with me if I was her boyfriend, so I was like, nope (I can remember exactly, though).
But I felt like I didn't like her enough to even try, and on top of that, she would just disappear out of nowhere, being God knows where, and then act like nothing happened... Not a behaviour I would expect form a girlfriend of mine (even if I was pretty green back then, having only kissed two girls, I had my limits/frame/goals pretty set, maybe from reading some Girls Chase?).

Things got quite weird at class with the girl that rejected me, I tried talking with her before class to apologize (honestly I think I was just still trying to bone her?). She acted weird, I got super nervous, she asked me what I wanted to talk with her about, I didn't knew how to answer it, so... Things got even weirder (at this point you can notice me making things even weirder is my trademark or something).
After this class finished (I failed, btw, nothing to do with her, more with me focusing more on the class before, Computer Theory, and my brain melting everytime on this class, so there was no chance I was gonna pass Calculus), I found her while trying to enroll in another uni to take some classes that were pretty much impossible to pass on our uni. She was in line with her friends, behind my friend, that "saved" a place for me in the line (she seemed a bit mad when I just popped out of nowhere in front of her). When I was leaving, we looked each other in the eye and she seemed a bit regretful of how things went, like maybe she really was attracted to me? No idea. Anyways, I didn't see her afterwards, though I think I saw her walking her dog last year near my friends house, big coincidence. I think she smiled, but we didn't say anything to each other (she was passing by and I barely recognized her).

About the blondie from my course, the next semester she was gone, and I was sad I was too drunk in that party to even make a move on her. Not long ago I found out she switched to med school, and I ended up boning her

 

[Beck Bass]

CHAPTER 5: MORE UNI PARTY TALES

After that, not much happened in uni envolving girls. I remember trying to text some on Facebook and even getting some replies but it would lead to nothing as I barely could approach any girl in real life yet (to be fair, I think this broad from my Calculus class was like the first girl I "cold approached", as in there was no social context there, the first girl I kissed in chapter 1 was more like a social circle thing).

I remember I went to another uni party with my bros, though, one of them now is married to a girl he met on Tinder, the other pretty much gave up on women and just wants to be rich or whatever (I tried to change his mind and get him into game many times but he's just lazy and bitter, he's also older and seems like he won't change/doesn't want to). This party wasn't from our public, nerdy tech university, it was from this big private uni, which means probably there were more hot girls there (and with more stuck up annoying attitudes as well lmao).
We got there kinda late, my friends were afraid we would be lame if we came in early, but we got like reaaally late and there was a gigantic line for some reason, I think the organizers just scammed people and sold way more tickets than the place could support (not that uncommon here in Braziland for university parties).

When we got inside it was feeling like it was kinda ending, a bunch of the cuter girls were leaving already, so we just did what we could: got drunk (laaaame). I remember being so bored I spilled some beer on purpose on my annoying friend that was complaining about the girls there. I also just remembered some other friend wanted me to approach a girl that was all alone in some corner, I have some myopia and I wasn't wearing glasses, so I was like, yeah, whatever, but as I got close I noticed how overweight she was lol (my asshole friends were laughing their asses off). I just kinda asked if she was okay (to be fair she could be sick there all alone and needing help), and then left politely, then cursed my friends for sending me into some accidental whale hunting.
In the end I also approached a cute girl, I made my way there and she was kinda receptive, I don't remember exactly what went on, but she was leaving with her friend soon after we started talking. I think I could have kissed her if I just went for it but I was really shaky and not that confident back then, but it felt good to at least get some approaches in.

Another uni party I went to was from some private university I can't even remember the name, but this one was smaller and kinda for like "med school on easy mode", so the girls there were like extra hot lmao. My annoying smug complainy friend invited me, so I didn't had my hopes up, and being the clumsy motherfucker I am I got there super late, unintentionally. When I got there though, there was some epic big room version of the Imperial March (that Darth Vader evil theme) playing, and a bunch of hot college girls there dancing, I was like "I am on paradise?" lmao
When I found my friend, he was pretty drunk, like drunk enough that I had to worry about him not just hitting his head on something and dying there without none even noticing, so that was annoying. He was like: "dude, you're so late I had to drink, look at all these hot girls, and I can't even approach one". He was also super fucking mad that cute girls were kissing some lame ugly guys (he himself is not that attractive, to be real, but some of those guys were even worse and were kissing hot girls, so he had a point in being mad). I myself was mad for getting there so late when the place was packed with hotties (and having to take care of my drunk friend).

My buddies were playing some foosball (there were some random silly games there, the place was like an "activity club", dunno if people have those abroad, with like pools and activities on the weekends for paying members), and I was just watching, then suddenly I saw this girl. Her hair was like a light brown, her face was like exactly my like perfect type, and her ass and tights... Holy moly, this girl was my ideal 10, for fucking sure. I remember her angelic face and her tight jeans showing her perfect curves, even today (though it's more of a mirage at this point). Not only that, but I eye fucked her hard (I believe by this point I was reading some articles by Hector already, though this must have been like 5 years ago or more, not sure, but I do remember working a lot on eye contact and holding it with everyone, specially hot girls), and she couldn't keep her eyes off mine. Other than looking down, on the sexiest, most submissive way possible, she was staring me down pretty hard as well. She was jsut sitting there in front of me, a few meters away, showing her body in a kinda shy way, staring.

My brain melted. Like, I couldn't believe this was happening, a girl like that, a dream came alive to me, just giving me hardest signs she was into me and waiting. And she waited.
And waited.
And I couldn't move.
At all.

Then she just gave up.
I could see the disappointment in her eyes, as she left to find her friends, feeling kinda sad.
I was feeling like absolute shit. Like, I wanted to hang myself there, but I still couldn't move.
It was really just that stupid.
I remember, in the moment, I was panicking so much my brain would find like ANY excuse it could to not approach her, like somehow my mind convinced this guy sitting on her side (not even that close) was her boyfriend and I shouldn't approach (who cares seriously), or that maybe she was looking at someone else (when there was none else near me).

Of all the girls I "failed" with, this one is the one I still regret, and I think it was only because she was so hot and so there for me, like she was absolutely my type and seemed to be as much into me as I was into her, like it was perfect love-at-first-sight, and I threw it away. Nowadays, I've kissed many girls that were as hot as her, to me at least, and even bedded a few, but I still feel bummed out by it. I know that it was all due to my lack of experience, like I couldn't believe a girl like this was into me, that I had a chance, and I had done so few approaches I was really insecure about how to even go about it (even though I feel like if I just walked towards her, we would just kiss and do God knows what lol).

After that, I had to take my drunk friend home, my dad saved me once again and left me on my friend's house to take care of him. He was fine, after a while, and we talked and played some video games, but I never went to parties with him again, as he just complained all the time and drank too much (I had to leave kinda early because of him, though I was feeling so defeated after this girl I kinda wanted to leave anyway).

This did teach me though that sometimes it's better going solo than having friends that will just cause problems and keep you in a conterproductive mindset, also that there were a bunch of cute/hot girls out there waiting for guys to approach them, so if I could only work harder on getting out there and beating the fear of approaching, I could find success with women (I already had worked a lot on my fundamentals, reading Girls Chase during that time, and women were showing a spike in attraction towards me, so I felt like I just had to work on actually having a process and going through with it).

 

[Beck Bass]

CHAPTER 6: DARKEST DAYS

So, since I got into uni, things have been getting more and more tense with my family. Back in school, I was like the top student, or amongst the top, always, but now I was just another dude, and those teachers were savage. I managed to escape the first semester unharmed (me and most of my colleages), but in the second one we had two complicated physics at the same time, plus having experimental physics on the labs with an annoying old teacher. This woman, that also taught us physics 2, seemed like she developed quite some grudge towards me, calling me out in front of my colleages when I would arrive late or do anything at all in class (to be fair, most of the time I would just write my name on a piece of paper, leave it at her desk and bounce, since she allowed that, and her class was pretty useless, but it obviously made me her prime target on the other class I couldn't escape from).
But that was nothing compared to our physics 3 teacher, some next level of douchebag. Picture this guy, in his early 30s, dressed like your average frat guy, hitting on his female students (most of them seemed disgusted by it), inviting his students to the bar after class, like totally pretending he's the cool bro teacher. His classes were pretty average, but he used some bizarre niche textbook none else used, and all the questions he used in his test were the hardest, most absurd questions from some famous book, which of course wasn't the one he used to teach in class and insisted we studied with. The result was that, out of ten, I think the highest grade in our class was like a 4, in that first test (some people in that class had taken this class before with him, some were like a full year ahead of us in engineering, from other courses).
Then his classes became worse and worse, everyone was tired of it, most did the math and knew that they were never gonna pass, so his class became like some desert wasteland, with less than a fourth of his students. People went ahead to complain about how bad his classes were and how OTT his tests were (I still remember some question in the FIRST test in which we had to calculate like the eletric charge of some chemical bomb or something like that, than use that to calculate something else, using atomical numbers and integrals and what not, this guy was a full on psychopath), and he would blame on the students not showing up to classes. Like, of course, they had all failed the class already, and his classes were garbo, what was the point?!? I also remember a friend of mine took his dad to complain with him (honestly, a bit of a childish move, considering he was legally a man, but we were quite juvenile and green back then, as most late teens), and the teacher showed his dad screenshots of some game my friend was playing that he posted on FaceBook, saying he did bad because he was too busy playing games, instead of studying (this psycho would add all of his students in it, I blocked him soon enough lmao).

Anyway, after that epic failure of a second semester (not to mention the fact that I made a full on platformer game for a programming class, months of work, the best on the class, and then failed because my friend that told me would make a report on that for the teacher, never did it properly), things started going more and more downhill. It was clear I wasn't going to finish my engineering course in five years, but that was kinda obvious, since most of the people doing Computer Engineering in that place, even the best ones, would take at least 7 years to finish, due to how irrational the program was and how degenerate the teachers were. I also started questioning more and more why the fuck did I go get into engineering when I was programming since I was 12, pretty much (I started on an old game engine called Game Maker, but when I got into uni, I pretty much knew most of the stuff they were teaching, just not formally).

Thinking back now, I could have just learned a few of the more popular programming languages after school, and in like half a year I would be able to take pretty much any junior programming position in some company here (though, I guess back then, there weren't nearly as many jobs). But my parents were VERY adamant about me and my sister going into university, since they didn't and they struggled to get good jobs since they had me at an early age and yadayadayada. I also never worked before, being like the briliant student before, my parents were like "yeah, just focusing on studying, you're doing great", and I was still really shy and probably would have trouble finding a job early on, at least, so dunno.

I was just trying to stay alive at uni, things were getting worse and worse, but every now and then there was a cool class that had a little bit of something new and cool and would give me just enough to keep my hopes up. I would also talk often about my troubles at uni with my parents, and they would dismiss it pretty hard, saying I wasn't studying hard enough (I had classes from like 7am to 5pm, plus at least 3 hours everyday studying and trying to get shit done from uni, but because I played some games to escape my miserable life often, they would tell me I was being lazy).
I did pretty much every programming class I could, but the electronics part was a headache to me. I assumed, before going into school, that I really wanted to know how a computer worked, like on a deep, low level, but after trying to take some of those classes, I realized that, well, not really. I also had a younger friend from school that was also into programming and games that was doing super well in Computer Science (I did the test for it leaving school and passed, but for some reason I chose Computer Engineering, go figure).

I watched some of his classes and his teachers were dope, they did way less hours, and their classes seemed way deeper into programming and more like my thing. Also, it was the other public uni at the city, mine being the grey, concrete-full, gloomy place, while their had every type of course, with some hot girls chilling around sitting on the grass on campus, they even had some small parties at Fridays there. I seemed like paradise, and I was living in hell, really. So I just decided I would take control of my life, finally, and decided to leave, after like 3 full years of engineering. But, of course, my parents weren't very excited about it.
Everybody I talked to told me it was a bad idea, and to be fair, it was kinda stupid. On top of taking 3 full years to get the resolve to tell my parents, screw that, I'm changing, I decided that AFTER the date of the test to enter the other uni, so, basically, I had to wait until next year to get in. So yeah, dumdumb, but I couldn't take it anymore, really. So I just kept doing the few classes that remained that maybe I could validate on the other uni, and trying to get some internship using the fact that I was still in uni (though I didn't managed to get any, as people would question why I was doing so little classes, I would tell them I was switching courses, they would be like, ooh, ok, and never get back to me again. Also, I was shy and awkward, not having half the social skill I have now, so that didn't help).

My parents, specially my mom, weren't happy with the whole situation, at all. My mom told me I had to help at home, since I was in my early twenties, but I never had a job before, since they always told me I need to just focus on studying, but since I wasn't doing so hot anymore, that wasn't true anymore, I suppose. I remember she would tell me some fucked up stuff everyday, making me feel like a useless piece of dirt (now I understand that it wasn't her intention, but she wasn't exactly nice with her words, to be fair), I also remember telling her some extremelly fucked up stuff in tense moments, that I deeply regret.
If only I took a simple job, I could be meeting more people, being more social, and having money to go out with girls, hit some clubs, and have some fun, you know, but my ego was too fucking big to get a simple job at this point, since I was always the best in class, the ace student, and my parents made me very proud of that, so I attached my identity to that, pretty much. Now that it was all going downhill, I was feeling like shit (I honestly remember having suicidal thoughts at my darkest hours, but having had a friend that killed himself at the start of uni, and seeing how broken his mother and friends were at his funeral, I couldn't bring myself to do it, also, I knew deep inside that I loved living, and this was just a bad phase, like a really bad one lol, but it was gonna pass).

Eventually, I passed the test for the other uni, and, even though they didn't give me half of the equivalence of classes I took I thought I would get, the new enviroment was a whole lot better, and I came around, after all. Also, by the end of the year of the test, I went out to clubs a couple of times and made some pretty cool stuff happen, that took my game to the next level (or the the first level, I suppose, since it was complete shit before hehe). I'm gonna tell you about those next chapter.

 

[Yaxir]

All u need to remember is calibrate to the girl and you would be fine.

what does it mean to calibrate the girl ?

can anyone explain ?

I will probably start approaching (hopefully with another rookie, we will be winging each other)

going to need all the help i can get, that first approach is so, so important for me !

 

[Yaxir]

I'm optimistic, I don't fear bad stuff is gonna happen (because I feel like I'm gonna be able to handle whatever comes)

This is the belief every rookie needs while starting out day game !

We can handle it ! no matter what comes

just stay cool-headed and relax ! even if it looks like shit is going to get worse

or something feels really uneasy and anxious, it's not them .. it you !

it's your internal idiot anxiety just trying to convince your subconscious to run away ( again ! sound familiar ? yeah, it's always been this little bitch who's responsible for all the times you felt guilty or kicked yourself for being nervous with girls or in the presence of girls ! )

even if she turns away, ignores you and rejects you in anyway that feels humiliating

don't take it seriously and don't feel weirded out ! Please for your own sake, don't feel offended !

kick that 'manly' ego out of your game ! that idiot fucker has been holding you back for so long !

it's ok to get rejected !

rather it's good lol ( you sometimes get to know what not to do lol )

P.S : this is me speaking to myself lol , feel free to read it !

 

[Beck Bass]

CHAPTER 7: A NEW BEGINNING (PART I)

So, in my last year in old evil uni, I went to one last uni party, one from the new uni I was going too (confusing, I know lol).
Originaly my sister was going to this party, and she invited me, so I said I would go too (I guess she invited me so mom would chill and allow her to go, we also could share a cab back home). But as the date of the party was close, she told me she couldn't do it (she had an event to work or something).
I was like "what now?", but eventually I decided I would go by myself and have a good time anyway (I guess that that article on going out solo inspired me).

I remember getting there early, there were some cute-ish friendly girls in the "dancefloor", I started kinda dancing and they were around, soon we were talking. They said I was brave for being there all alone, we started drinking together and they kinda made me part of their group. It felt good having 5 girls dancing aorund me and giving me attention just for going talk to them.
After a while they said they needed to go to the bathroom, I didn't know if they were trying to dismiss me nicely, so I figured I would go around and talk to some other people. I think I talked to some girls but none was really biting, so I just sat there and chilled a bit. Then I saw a girl I had a crush very early on school there with her boyfriend, she seemed surprised to see me there since I was the nerdiest, shyest kid at school, but she was with her ugly boyfriend lmao, I felt kinda bad for her, as she seemed she was into me.
After a while the girls just came out looking for me! Very nice of them.
One of them seemed specially interested in me and was touchy-flirty, so I asked her when we were more isolated:
"Do you kiss guys?"
"Do I look like a lesbian? lol"
"I figured I would just ask", then I kissed her. I kinda asked that just because I didn't know how to proceed, I felt like just going for it would be the way to go, because she might not be thinking of that at all in that moment, also just asking seemed weak.

We kissed a bunch more and drank, stupid people were throwing beer in the air like morons, eventually the girls were leaving and asking me if I was gonna go along. I wanted to go to the after party with them, but for some reason my dad was coming out to pick me up, so oh well. I tried contacting the girl afterwards, but she was older and thought I was older as well, and got a bit turned off when she knew my age (in person she was really into me, go figure lol)
Anyway, this teached me that going out solo could be a lot of fun, that I could meet cool new people, and didn't had the pressure of bing with my friends and taking care of them, if they need me, as well.

After that I went into that whole depression shebang, but towards the end of the year the test for new uni was close, and I was confident I was gonna pass, and all would be better, also I generally feel happier and more hyped towards the end of the year anyways because of my birthday coming hehe. For my birthday, my gramma gave me quite some money (thank you gramma!), and there was this club were broke late teens would go, that you could get in without paying, if you stayed in line like an hour before opening lmao. So this is where I would spend this money!

So I went like 4 weekends in a row there, starting near my birthday. It started with my friends suggesting this place as it was cheap, so I went there with them to celebrate. A lot of them actually were not that into night clubs, so they left quite early, but it was still cool that they went there to see me. After that, my friends wanted to "find me a girl", and i was like, ffs, I can do it myself, just watch guys!

I went to talk to a very cute short delicate girl there, she had a bit of an accent of people from even more south of Brazil (it's very subtle, but it's something towards Argentina's Spanish or something), so I teased her on that. We talked for like twenty or thirty minutes straight, I tried touching her as much as I could, but all I did as incidental touch, at best, my game was clearly suffering from not going out for ages. Eventually, she wanted to be with her friends, I didn't feel like being there on their group, specially as there were some guys that I felt were way more "in" there than I was, so I bid her farewell.
Afterwards, I was a bit mad, because I spent so much time on this cute girl, she seemed into me, but I couldn't get anything, it was like 3AM already, but this club wouldn't close until sunrise, so I was like, I'm not leaving until I get at least a girl to make out with. I saw this taller, darker skinned girl, I was going towards her, but talking was not getting much from her (she was barely responding to me). She just kept on dancing, but I started dancing near her, and she seemed into it, so I just got closer and closer, eventually I was staring her down and we were kissing. I think I asked her when I opened her if she knew that other girl I was talking to, I thought they were on the same group, but she said they weren't, and I think she saw me with this girl, because afterwards she just wanted to move towards her. I was like "maybe we shouldn't get too close to my little girlfriend, she might get jealous", kinda laughing, but she kept moving me there, and soon we were kissing right in front of the other girl. I could see in her face she was fucking mad, so she just started grinding on the guy behind her, and then kissed him, probably just out of spite of me lmao (kinda sad tbh, I really found her beatiful and wanted to be with her instead, but my "killer instinct" wasn't there, this day, at least not on the first approach).

I went out with the tall girl I kissed afterwards, again to the movies, terrible idea, but at least I had the guts to put my hands on her legs (the fact that I didn't like her as much as the other girl made me less nervous, for sure) while we watched. But after that we were eating some stuff and she just wouldn't leave her phone alone, like I started acting aloof and almost ignoring her and she still would be looking at her phone all the time, so I felt like going home. She also said she needed to bounce, but then her attitude changed: as she was waiting for the Uber, she started looking at me a lot, so I started touching and kissing her. She gave me some buffer resistance as my hands were on her ass (she didn't take them out, though), like "who said you could do this?" and I told her, "well, I nobody said I couldn't". After the date, she started chasing quite a bit, inviting me for boyfriend like things, like going to shows together, but I was like, naaah (not only I was not that into her, but I hate girls that are too much on their phones, I think she was doing this mostly because she was nervous with me, but still).

I thought I would be able to write about all the outings of that end of year on this chapter, but it seems like this post is getting too long (as I often make them be lol). So next one is gonna be the other outings, fun stuff, make sure you don't miss it

 

[Beck Bass]

CHAPTER 8: A NEW BEGINNING (PART II)

So this is where things get interesting. Even if I got the girl I didn't quite want and the date was meh, the little success I got on my last outing gave me the will to go out more. So I think I went out again on Saturday of that same week (my birthday there was Friday I think). I got quite early so I didn't have to pay lmao, the little money I had I would use for one or two beers or a drink, I'm a cheap skate and I was determined to make the most out of the money my gramma gave me, since I didn't have a job and so any money at this point. Other than that, I can't remember much about that particular outing, I guess I did better than last time, like kissed a few girls, but I was getting frustrated that girls wouldn't want to see me afterwards and things wouldn't get that sexual other than a bit of kissing and ass squeezing.

So next time I went out I went with my grumpy smug friend from Chapter 5, somehow he was the only one that would go out with me (I think my main wing now was still dating his religious ex, one of my other best friends was living in the US and the other was pretty much married already). We got there kinda early, but the line to get in without paying was already full of people, so we barely got in time. As we were getting closer, we noticed that we were in the wrong line, we were in the one for birthday people, and obviously my birthday was long gone (not long, but like one or two weeks before). In fact, if we entered the other, normal line, we would have had to pay, and in this case, I believe there were better clubs to go to (my friend even say that if he had to pay he would enter lol, just to be an annoying butt).

As I was about to get in, the guy that worked there asked what was the name of the "birthday person", I just told him:
"Man, I really gotta pee, I've been in this line for like an hour, even if I have to pay, just let me in already, please!"
And he let me and my friend in, without paying lmao
I was like, hell yeah, now that's social mastery! (not paying like 4 dollars to enter a shitty club lol)

We got in and me and my friend got beer, I saw this little group of 3 indie-ish girls there and one was very cute, so I had to approach. I just came in with the usual "Hey, how you're doing? What's your name?" type of stuff, but my friend was really bad with girls and just socially in general, so he was lagging behind and kinda dragging me down. The girl initially reacted well to my approach, but my friend was making it weird for her and her friends, so they kinda just excused themselves and left. I didn't get that mad at my friend because they weren't that hot, but oh well.

Afterwards my friend decided to be a cool dude and just payed me a strawberry "capirinha" (basically just vodka, ice and juice), I drank it fast immediatly after my beers, so I was getting quite a bit drunk. I started talking with him how annoying those girls from our city were, that they were super conservative and acted like they were the shit (tbh even guys from other places in Brazil tell me girls here tend to be hotter, like the average girl here tends to be at least cute, and I have to agree there's a lot of hotties), that they rather get played by some guy saying he will be their boyfriend to put out than be sexual and follow their desires and have sex with a hot guy without anything in exchange, that type of thing. Then it happened: I saw some hot girl, my type, with my peripheral vision.

I started walking towards her almost immediatly and automatically, and she seemed to be looking at me as well, her body language very open and seductive. As I was getting near her, my eyes were turning towards her, but I think I only had full-on eye contact with her as we started making out. My hands were on her ass pretty much imediately, and it was like this movie scene type of thing: I just walked towards her with my most confident walk, and she just let me devour her then and there.
I squeezed her great round ass very firmly and she started moaning on my ear and stroking my cock, doing a sorta come-hither motion with her index and middle fingers, inside of my pants.

That was what I was talking about! At this point, I never had pulled a girl from a club before, and to be frank, I don't know if that was the best decision. A girl close to us started actting shocked and saying timidly stuff like "Find some private place to do this type of stuff!", clearly she was a bit jealous and getting turned on by watching a hot girl get dominated publicly by a guy like me. So after all this, I can't remember if I bid my friend farewell, but I just asked the girl "You wanna get out of here?" and she said "Yeah", and grabbed me towards the exit.

As we were leaving the club, the bouncer on the exit was like "Are you sure you wanna leave?" (it was like not even midnight, I think) and I said "Yes, were leaving". Then it hit me, I had no idea what I was doing. I lived with my parents, and with my younger brother being just a kid and sleep on the room nextdoor with my parents, there was no way I would take a girl home. I also had no money for a motel/love hotel and I've never been on one before by that point. I was also a virgin lmao

We just started walking outside, and I kept kissing her passionately and squeezing her ass, she kept stroking my cock and moaning and whatnot. I would press her against walls on the streets, lick her neck and make her go crazy, then keep walking like it was normal. I never felt so free and dominant before, so the idea of what to do next wasn't so much on my mind.
We talked a bit about each other, I can't really remember her name (quite funny that she told me only after moaning to me lmao), she told me she was from Bahia, this much hotter state north of here, so it kinda made sense to me she wasn't a prude like the other girls there. She asked me where I was taking her (and I answered some vague bs), then told me she's done it with guys on the beach and other public place, I'm like, hell yeah, I'm fuck this hoe in the middle of the street lol

Eventually we got into some isolated place with lots of cars parked, I started massaging her pussy over her pantyhose (before we stopped because she wanted to pee, she just found a bush, crouched a bit and got her pantyhose down and did it - I think she was wearing no panties), she moaned more. I wanted to put my dick inside of her and fuck her there but there were some weird people passing by on the streets, and she was almost trembling (not only because my kissing and manual skills, but it was kinda cold and people from north of here generally find here very cold). She then asked me if I wanted to go to her place, she said she lived with her dad and she hated him, I, like a total dufus, ended up refusing, thinking her dad would kill me, or maybe I would get there and he would throw me out of his house and I would have to go home like 3AM with no money from somewhere far away (to be fair, she seemed a bit like she was doing it just out of spite of her dad, but I still do regret big time fucking this up, I probably could have lost my virginity to a super hot girl, but I guess I just wasn't ready, dunno).

So, she left to her home, I felt kinda bad, but I had agreed to meet my sister afterwards for us to go back home together, she was in a nearby club, so I went there. I got in around 3AM, I was first gonna wait for her outside, but she said I got there too early, so I got in. There, I approached and made out with two more girls. My sister was quite surprised with me, and I was like, that was nothing lol

I went out a last time a week after, this time solo, as not even my grumpy friend wanted to hang out anymore. I did made some cool friends soon after getting in the club, a guy and two girls, they danced all the songs like crazy people, and made a bit of fun of my walk when I first met them (I was working on my walk, to make it sexier, but it was deff try hard back then). I made out with some random girls but none was quite my type, I also thought the other girl, that wasn't the girlfriend of the dude, was into me, but I never did a move (she wasn't that hot, and I didn't want things to go sour with them). The guy even took my number to invite me to some stuff afterwards (he never got back to me, though lol, but whatever), they were really cool people.

Towards the end of the night, I finally found "gold in the mine", as I like saying: this really feminine, small, cute girl was sitting behind me on a bench (there's like the dancefloor inside but also a "garden" outside with another bar where people can chill). She was sat down, do I didn't quite know how to proceed, but her friend seemed like she was really engaged talking to the guy on her side, and she was kinda looking out for something, so I though I would just slide by her side and slowly engage her, and that was what I did: I sat near her, almost as if not noticing her, then I looked at her, and as she looked back, I introduced myself and kissed her hand. She got kinda shy and bubbly, we talked a bit, soon we were kissing. I got her contact, but it was near the end of the year and she was going to travel, so we never ended up meeting (I was also broke as a joke so no idea what type of date I could have taken her on lmao).

Anyway, that night was also a lot of fun, and I felt like I broke a lot of barriers in my night game those nights, like I was starting to really get any good at it, and it felt great, even if I fucked up losing my V-card to a girl that was hot and heavy for me. Next year, after I got an internship at my new uni (and started getting a bit of money), I started going a lot to this club and meeting new girls, so I'm gonna talk about the most remarkable ones (that I can remember, if course, all of this was like 4 years ago, some even more). See ya then!

 

[Beck Bass]

CHAPTER 9: MY FIRST NICHE (TEENIE CLUB FOR BROKEN KIDS)

So in the next year, as soon as I had some little money, I would go to this club. I would get in line, like half an hour before it opened, so I didn't have to pay lmao, get in, and approach all cute girls there. Most of the time I was alone, as my wing at the time was in the US, and my other friends were in relationships.

This was like an Irish inspired bar/club, there was an outside area with little rocks on the ground and a more opened up bar, that people would go to sit and talk, as they drinked and smoked, and inside there was like 2 small bars and the dancefloor (there was also a little chill area to sit, but people couldn't smoke there, so generally it was mostly empty, other than a few people that reserved tables there for whatever reason). I would be mostly on the dancefloor, eyefucking girls hard and dancing, but I also often would go outside for a good breath (I didn't smoke so I'm talking about fresh air, really lol), and approach girls sat down there in a more chill/conversation-based way.

I was still very shy and not very social. I was putting an effort to talk with random people when I could, but I wasn't even going to uni much as in the start as I got really screwed with how the whole curriculum worked (I had to do some really basic classes before unlocking the rest of the course, because Computer Science and Engineering didn't share thaaat much, after all). So many days I had to push myself really hard to get out of home, specially since I was going solo. There were I think one or two times I went out and I tried kinda talking to people there, but none really seemed to click with me, people were too much on their little groups, and there weren't girls hot enough for me to just persist and be there to approach, so I would just go home really early, feeling defeated.

Most of the time, though, I would meet some really cool random people, that would integrate me into their group. I would say my little inoccent face would seduce them lol, I'm a really sincere person, though I'm mostly introvert and rather not talk, most of the time, my sister also says my face is really expressive and she can always read my emotions (though she has 2 decades of practice, not fair). Also, I think just naturally I'm good looking, I'm relatively tall (6 feet), and by that time I was reading Girls Chase quite a lot, even if I didn't practice approaching that much before, I put a lot of effort into getting my fundamentals down, my walk, posture, body language in general, and the way I dressed, and I could see a big difference from girls (before some cuteish girls would give me little signs of attraction, after that, even very hot girls would play hard with their hair, put their hands around their boobs and ass, and look down if we made eye contact, at times, so I was feeling like a bit of a boss - and I still feel, of course hehe).

Being in a group with random people was cool because I could get the social momentum I needed to approach girls more easily and smoothly (since I was mostly dicking around at home alone, this made a big diff), also, since they weren't my friends, and I really owed them nothing, really, I could leave them at anytime and just approach or do whatever I wanted (of course I tried to be a cool guy, but you know what I mean).

To be fair, since I was very shy, a good amount of the girls I would make out with there and maybe get a bit more sexual were girls that would make it easy for me. There was this little foosball table there, near to some bar on the inside area, and I would use it as an excuse to play with cute girls. Most girls there were fresh out of high school, uni freshwomen? They were from like barely legal to in their early twenties. I would use playing with those girls as an excuse to keep on talking to them, and maybe dancing with them, later in the dancefloor, and eventually we would make out and maybe there would be some fingering or whatnot (I mostly wouldn't try to pull, as I didn't have even basic logistics, I think I just hoped I would get a blowie in the bathroom or the girl would invite me home, which of course mostly didn't happen, as the girls were quite young, and most lived with their parents). For a while I would get their numbers or Facebook and try to set up a date afterwards, but I mean, logistics still sucked, so I just said fuck it after a while, and just tried to get what I could, in the moment.

I remember one day I got there and the place was kinda empty, there was this group with a few cute girls, but there were also some guys and most of them didn't seem too receptive to me. I stayed around for a while, and one of the girls just came up to me kinda miscievously and said "wanna play?" (fussball), "who wins gets a kiss", and I'm like, are you serious (excited), but I just said, yeah, lets go ;D
So I just won, as fast as I could (I was really bad at it, but she was making it easy for me), and we kissed. After that, I was more confident to approach more girls, that were arriving at the dancefloor, but we made out more later, I remember I was pressing her against the bar, she had her left leg locked into me, very sexy. She was a bit chubby, but still very sexy and sweet. I think just having fun with this girl made me even more motivated to go there.

Another night the city was kinda empty at night, I think it rained most of the day and it was a bit cold, but I got in line with my stylish leather jacket, and there were a group of three sexy girls in front of me, they were talking to this guy that took care of cars parked there, he talked to me also, but I couldn't quite get to talk to the girls (later they told me at first they thought I was gay lmao, to be fair, I dressed much better than most guys there, also I was a bit shy, so there's that). I got inside, and I met this cool little girl and her brother playing fussball, she wasn't like super hot or my type, but I figured I would kiss her anyway, and I did. Later we were on the dancefloor and she seemed very happy there with me, but when she went to the bathroom, one of those girls from the line (the hottest, taller, thiner one) came up to me and started talking like veryyy sexy to me, like geez, I could feel her horniness in her words, I of course owned the other girl nothing, so I just made out hard with this hot girl, squeezing her ass, and then of course the other girl I kissed before just came from the bathroom and saw it, and got mad.
After that, I was chilling, but then the friend of the girl I just kissed came up to me, she had like this great ass, even if her face wasn't as beautiful as the other girl (I would have kids with this hoe, no joke), she was still very hot, so I had to kiss her too. After that, she said she and the other girl I kissed were "sisters", and it was common for them to kiss the same guy when out partying (I of course knew it all was from preselection, maybe they were already attracted, but really thought I was gay, then they saw me kissing other girl and became even more attracted, I kissed her hot friend, so now she lusted for me even more, I also got lucky because there very few guys there and all those hot horny girls, but that was me forcing myself to go out, after all). After that, I remember being outside sitting with those two girls, each on one of my arms, giggling, and me feeling like a fucking boss. Sadly, I didn't get much more sexual with any of them, I saw beautiful girl again two weeks later at this club, we made out, but I was drunk and a bit needy, so I think she just moved on or something.

Eventually my wing came back form the US, he wasn't quite keen on approaching much himself, but he would always be there for me to talk with me and get me on a social mood (and so we have some fun together), so I'm very thankful to him. One day I was just staring down a girl in the dancefloor, and she came in my direction, crossing the entire dancefloor to approach me, and as she arrived, we just started making out hard, my hands on her ass, not a word exchanged. After that, my friend asked me if I knew this girl, there was no way I didn't, he told me lol. I also remember one of the hottest girls I ever kissed was there, I was walking in the dancefloor, looking for some honey, and this super sexy girl in a tight dress just passed by me, we slowed down, eyefucking each other, and then just ate each others face. It was beautiful.

Another very, very hot girl I made out with was a young brunnete that had like an "indian" (not like South Asian, but native American/Brazilian) costume on, tanned skin, killer body. I approached her after making out with another girl (notice a pattern? I think I was only able to approach very hot girls after making out with more average chicks, my selfsteem really needed a boost, back then), some redhead that was friend of a friend and into me, so it was really easy. She was busy with her gay friends dancing, and complained about everything there, like the music (why was she there, then?), so I just left her, and I saw this super hot girl looking at me. I just came really close in a dominant way, asked her her name, gave her mine, and we started making out viciously, she was grinding her thicc thighs on mine, girls had tried to lick my ear before, but it was weird, but when this girl did it... Man... I almost jizzed on my pants lmao
She asked me afterwards why I took so long to approach her, I didn't even noticed she was waiting for me lol (maybe she was just fucking with me, but I remember seeing her when I first entered the place and making a mental mark to approach her later).
I got her number, but I think I didn't quite handled things super well there (I think I got a bit needy by the end of the night and things got a bit weird, maybe I should have just left earlier), also she added me on Facebook, and her friend commented something among the lines of "well, some people REALLY did had a good time last night hehe" (apparently, her friend also was into me, she asked me if I would have kissed her friend, I was like yeah, but I prefer you), but this was a bit embarassing and maybe a little slut shaming, from her friend, such a shame (honestly, if I could I would take both home with me lol).

So those are, I think, the most memorable stories from this place. There were also quite a few dumb fuck ups, and many other girls that I made out with, fingered and stuff like that (I remember kissing like more than 10 hot girls with this silly Nirvana t-shirt I had lol), but this post is already too damn long. I wouldn't get any P in the V from this almost whole year going to this place (like 2 times a month), but it taught me a lot of good lessons on approaching on night clubs, and just game in general, and also made my self steem much higher, as now I had gotten at least a bit sexual with some very beautiful and hot girls, so I knew that I could get hot girls, I just had to work more on my game, and go out more (and get decent logistics, of course). Nowadays I think this club isn't even the same, but I have some great memories from this place, and I'm quite glad that I discovered it, and that there was such a place, where a broke uni student like me could get some easy experience.
Nextime I'm gonna talk about the second club I went out a lot with my friends, some gay clubs with some really hot girls, so I see you soon! ;D

 

[Beck Bass]

CHAPTER 10: LETS WRAP THIS PAST SHIT UP!

So I could write lots of chapters from my past experiences, from the last one, to about now, or at least the start of the whole Corona shit, that made my night game go to shit. Anyway, I'll try to warp up the missing pieces in one big piece, so I can fucking move on and talk about what's going on now here.
In fact I don't think I'll write in chapters anymore, fuck this shit lol
Anyway, enjoy the last one ;D

So between "my first niche" and now, there were two clubs I really used to go to game, and by the very end there was this little bar where younger people hung out, full of hot 18 to early 20 years olds. I also used to hang out with my friends in other clubs and bars, we would go out frequently, and I would be seducing girls every chance I got (I love women, after all).
I lost my V-card to this chubby girl, friend of a friend, met her at the club, he introduced me to her, she was his classmate, she obviously wanted him to fuck her, but he was still in some toxic ass relationship with his now X (5 years of breaking up and being back together, she was younger, and he was very immature, anyway, fuck those two). She said she was cold, hoping he would offer her some "confort", but I did instead, offering my leather jacket to her. At first, she seemed mad at me for doing this, but I started talking to her, identifying her horniness, and we started making out.
Like really hard.
We went into the dancefloor, or at least at the door that lead to it (we were in the "smoking area" before, even though we don't smoke, everyone that clubs knows this is where people chill and talk), I pressed her against it, I was squeezing her ass hard, I was trying to finger her V from behind, but apparently I was stimulating something else (this girl turned out to be crazy about anal)...
Anyway, I was in my asshole/fuck those hoes phase, I didn't get her number or anything, she wouldn't go fuck that night, so I was like, whatever (pretty funny considering I was a virgin, but I used to go clubbing, make out and connect with a bunch of girls, but because I had shit logistics - living with my parents, no car, very little money as well - I would grab their contact, only to nothing ever pan out later, so I was like, fuck this; the girl I almost had sex with on last episode happened on a night I was really in this mood). But eventually she got my number through my friend, we started fucking, and we kept for like 2 years.

Meanwhile, I was still partying every weekend and practicing game, I have to say now that being with her probably slowed me down a bit and made me feel guilty for leaving her alone to try and get on other girl's panties, but I told her from the start I didn't wanted anything too serious, and for most of our relationship I try seeing her less frequently than once a week (eventually when the whole Corona stuff happened I got needy and she was living alone, so I pretty much married her and lived with her half the week for a while, but by the end of last year I was done with it).
So I met a bunch of girls, and I felt my game getting stronger, but my logistics were still shit, so I was rarely getting laid with other girls (I'm pretty glad I had her, though, out sex was great, and overall she was great company, she taught me a lot about women and relationships, we still talk and see each other nowadays, but I had to give her like half a year of silence after our breakup to let her let go of me a bit).

My second lay was like half a year later than meeting her, was a friend of a friend, not particularly attractive but I found her cute. She was a real sweetheart to me, but the sex was terrible, I fucked her twice, but I couldn't last more than like 3 minutes because the day before my main squeeze destroyed me in bed, like we fucked 4 times in a row, my dick was hurting afterwards (now I see I should have just cancelled with the other girl, but I was really hungry for my second lay, dunno if I really regret it, I was dumb and needed to learn lol).
I then slept with some weird girl from Tinder, I booked us a normal hotel room so we could "just sleep together" (she texted me before the day telling me we wouldn't have sex, so I'm glad I did it this way, instead of taking her to a love hotel, she was a bit skittish). She gave me big LMR that night, so I just turned around and said "ok, let's sleep then", by the middle of the night I woke up with her taking her titties out lmao.
Sex was terrible, she at least gave me a footjob, something new for me, she had great tits, but that was about it, afterwards she turned out to be really nuts and lived far away, so I was like fuck this shit.

I suppose fourth one was blondie from uni that I met at a uni party years later, like a year after losing my V-card... This one was a big breakthrough for me, I fucked a girl I had a crush before, but I think I let it get to my head, I got too invested in her, meanwhile playing the whole "fuckboi" persona, partying all the time without her... Eventually she just posted something with some other dude on her IG, I already knew our whole deal was dead, but this was like seeing the corpse, now my dumb mind couldn't deny it, it was a bit of an ego hit for me...
I started thinking it was because of the sex, that I was shit in bed, dumb stuff like that, I mean, maybe it wasn't the greatest she had, but clearly she was looking for something more serious (than me at least), she even went on a date with me after the fact, but it was weird, honestly (convo just wasn't flowing).

The end of that year (2019!) was really shit in terms of night game, maybe it was forewarning of what was to come, but anyway, I think I only really got over her when I fucked blondie from Carnival, like 6 months after (tbh in my head I thought I fucked another girl meanwhile, but I guess I was just tripping). This Carnival was really dope, my game was going towards it's peak, I would say, I was going out with one hot girl by the day and another by the night, using preselection and my whole "fuckboy" (with 4 lays lmao) persona in my favor, but then I guess it just kinda backfired, this girl slept with me, said I was good in bed, smart, sweet and hot, but she wanted to be my girlfriend, and she knew I wouldn't do it, so she just went along and started dating some other boring guy. I was great to get all that validation that I'm indeed all that, but I got in some really weird depression, not only because of this girl, but the whole Corona stuff, and everybody just fucking social signaling, no night life, no game for me, really.

At first I didn't leave my house for months, so I got no fucking pussy, but realizing this wasn't as bad as people said, and most were being fucking hypocrites, I started slowly going out. At first (by the fucking end of the year!), I slept with this girl from Tinder, she looked fine on her photos, but of fucking course she had put up a lot of weight on quarantine. Sex was mediocre and felt very "empty", but it was nice to at least feel like I could go back to fucking girls and stuff. Shortly after that, I met the beautiful girl that I dated for like 6 months, she was dope, but I don't feel like having an LMR right now, so we broke up. And here I am again, lonely and thisty for some new pussy...
I suppose I also slept with some random girl from a double date with my friend while I was with her, he matched a girl and we managed to convince her friend to come with us, sex was kinda bad, and she blocked me on IG afterwards lmao, but whatever.

So I got only 8 lays in like 3 years, makes me sad to even think about it, though I think last year was almost a complete waste, and this year was also very unproductive... That said, my first year I already managed to sleep with 3 girls, and I was sleeping with a new girl each 3 months half a year after losing my V-card, then I hit that slump after fucking my crush... And when I get out of it, in Carnival, everything looking up, me ready to leave my parents house and have my own crib to bring the hotties (I can remember at least half a dozen easy lays I lost due to shit logistics)... Fucking Corona comes, and I have to start over, from fucking scratch...
Overall the breakdown is that only 3 girls I met through cold approaching: my first girl and the two blondes, but the first one already knew my friend, so it was almost social circle (thought I did it like I would have done with any girl in night time). Two were social circle, 100%, the second and the last one, the freeby from my friend. The other 3 girls were from Tinder, though I would say only one was really worth it, like a girl I would have approached for realz, the others were weird generic sex. This makes me even madder at my "natural" friend, that got like double my lays, almost all from Tinder, some were really shitty ugly hoes, but he met also some really cute girls. Girls say I'm more handsome than him, but he's more "approachable", I suppose. I think I have a real problem with attainability/similarity with most girls, maybe they think I'm too hot to take them seriously or even respect them (I had one girl I was making out with at club tell me I wouldn't even answer her the next day, I was thinking like, ok, you're not quite that hot, but can't I like you anyway?), and my "fuckboi" act doesn't help any... So i suppose that's my main sticking point, other than just getting fucking emotional and not going out to game on the first place.
Overall though, I'm really grateful for all the experiences I got out of seduction, and I'm gonna keep it up, the two girls I dated changed the man I am now, and if I had to do it all over again, I would