What was the plan for after coffee that you were leading her with? She followed your lead to the car so that's a good start. But you didn't make it clear what the plan you proposed was (i.e. go back to your place to play ping pong, go to another cool bar down the street, etc) but maybe you just didn't write it here? Ideally you have her agree to the plan not agree to get in the car so its notMatter of fact, this happened the other night on a date. We got coffee. Talked for an hour. I said let's walk around across the street (driving distance). She said yes. We walk to the parking lot. I said let's take one car (translation: get in the car with me). She said no, very clearly. Surely you're not saying I stand there for 5 minutes pleading with her?
"Here we are at my car. Would you like to come in with me?"
"Come on. Let's chill."
"It's cold out (or whatever)."
"No. I'm not getting in the car with you."
"here come, lets steal the night away and have that ping pong contest we talked about. Im totally gonna kick your butt!"
"No I can't its late"
"No my darling the night is yet still young, it will only take 20 minutes to decide the grand champion and as soon as one of us is victorious we'll celebrate with a drink of my famous xyz cocktail and you can leave to get all the bedrest you need to crunch your accounting #'s tomorrow"
"hmm, idk I need all 8 hours of sleep to be productive and..
"AND! I personally ensure that you won't miss a wink (smiling) Come lets continue having a bit more fun. You want to ride with me or follow me in your car?"
Not a perfect example but much improved.
Yeah you can think of your fundamentals, conversation, and game as things that all contribute to impacting her emotions. So if your continually getting flat responses then your being flat or feeling flat yourself. Remember she feels what you feel, so if you feel flat she is to. If you feel alive passionate and sexual then she will to via state transfer.Regarding: "You know at the end of the day the decisive factor of a woman going home with you boils down to how you make her feel. Your impact on her emotions."
Very true. Then these women don't feel anything about me. And who knows what they felt going into the date. My hunch is barely anything. Maybe like "Meh he's worth an hour. Maybe he'll surprise me." In my opinion, I have zero edge and zero bad boy-ness. I think this is a huge factor. Not really sure how to change that besides covering myself with tattoos.
That could be an element.
You don't have to be the baddest edgy bad boy to get girls. (tho it help!) You can be a nice guy that radiates strength through holding good eye contact, passing her tests, and touching her and do just fine.
I know you know what the process looks like on paper. What I mean is you don't know what a good execution looks like in action. OR better yet what it should FEEL like."You know based on the questions you ask its almost like you have no clue what the process should even look like."
Maybe? Meet for coffee/drinks -> Let her talk -> maybe go to 2nd venue -> isolate somewhere, preferably at someone's place -> go for sex. I've read all the articles about it. I sound confused because I am.
That's why I was recommending you grab a copy of Super Seducer because the game does a great job of showing exactly what the seduction process should look/feel like from "hello" to asking her to go home with you. Richard (the guy who made the game) did a really good job of capturing the full seduction process on video and all the acting is very realistic and convincing in it. Plus Richard has nice guy game himself and isn't what you'd call edgy... Though he has edge as a nice guy.
Having a visual model to emulate can be very powerful for learning.
Lastly there could be a bit of incongruency in the type of guy they think you'll be vs the type of guy you come off as. Girls can sense this stuff.Again, I just can't reconcile what you guys are recommending vs. what my eyes are seeing. My eyes see girls that firmly don't want to follow my lead and clearly, emphatically say no when I try to move for isolation.
What I mean is a guy who confidently approaches a girl you would imagine is pretty experienced with girls but in your case your not experienced and girls might be feeling the disconnect there.
I experienced this my first year into seduction clearly as I only had 1 sexual experience up to that point.
The solution of course is two fold A) get more experience with women and B) fake it by emulating how successful guys act/behave/vibe.
That was a key thing for me is acting not like myself but like the role models I chose. Again at the end of the day your emulating the role models vibe you choose.
Hope we aren't giving you too much info and confusing you but those are the first thoughts that came to mind for me.