- Joined
- Nov 14, 2017
- Messages
- 305
TL;DR: Iʼve come temporarily to a town of 14,000, but will soon move to a city of 1.7 million, full of my type. Is it worth spending time trying to overcome deep‑rooted approach inhibition while Iʼm here in this town, or should I forget girls here, allowing me to move quicker?
Travels
Two months ago, I fled my Western nation, due to the Westʼs increasing political extremism. (Stay tuned for follow‑up in the “something bigger than COVID” thread.) I wound up temporarily in Central America, in a town of 14,000 people.
I could stay here indefinitely, but the plan is to continue on to Kampala, a city of 1.7 million in Uganda. I really want to live in East Africa. But there are some things I need to handle first, which Iʼm trying to do from my temporary home here in Central America.
Background
I spent two decades avoiding women, for various stupid and deluded reasons. Smartened up and came to a solid understanding, but unfortunately an introverted nature compounded by many years of near‑total avoidance left me with debilitating approach inhibition.
In my home city, the inhibition was exacerbated by my obstinate desire to touch nothing but black women, who make up not even 10% of my cityʼs females. Looking at 90% of the women around you as though they donʼt even have a pussy, makes approaching the remainder really intimidating. I would spend a whole day at a busy megamall, around thousands of women and hundreds of black women, yet only manage to approach one or two. Over time those one or two cumulatively did get me laid, but it took forever, which led to fatal performance anxiety.
Opening up to other races would have been a logical solution, but I wasnʼt having it at all, so instead I decided to move to a city where most of the women are black, anyway.
Alas, practicality kept that on the back burner for several years, until finally a draconian vaccine mandate trumped practicality.
Opening Up
As for Central America, I was not expecting to fancy the chicks here; I had assumed they mostly all had the stereotypical Latina look. But I was wrong!
For one, girls that are at least part-black are a way larger fraction than in my home city. Most are mixed, but these can be quite beautiful, especially mixtures with the Mezzo‑American “natives.” I also happen to be in a pocket where those natives themselves are still quite common: the Maya, who built all those crazy pyramid temples. Some even speak Maya! Well, I thought I only liked black girls, until I saw Maya chicks.
And so I am now open to a fairly large chunk of the women around me — a stark contrast to my home city!
I still love African women way more. And there are other advantages to living in Kampala. So I donʼt plan to stay in Central America indefinitely. But Iʼd really like to sleep with some girls here while Iʼm here.
Iʼm almost as exotic to these Central American chicks as they are to me, and Iʼve caught some noticing me. A couple even coyly said “hi” after they saw me looking. Oh, man, so much potential!
I initially figured that my newfound openness would ease the approach inhibition. To that end, I asked myself to look at even Mestiza, the least exotic chicks common here.
I also did a very good thing from day one: I made a point to greet people on the street. I come from a very introverted city, so this was quite alien for me, but Iʼve been doing it anyway. Back home, I usually didnʼt have the balls, but here it is not as difficult. Not that people here greet all the time, but they also donʼt have this stunned, “oh, my God, this random guy is talking to me” look. I made a point to randomly greet people because it would make it more natural to randomly greet women.
As a result, I have randomly greeted more attractive chicks here in one month than I did in several years back home.
Alas, this has not led to actually hitting on chicks. It has just moved the inhibition from step 1 to step 2. Iʼve planned some good routines, but after wandering around for hours on a number of occasions, so far I havenʼt been able to push myself to even take it past a mere greeting.
Motivation is certainly not the issue. I decided not to masturbate in Africa, and so far I havenʼt masturbated in Central America, either.
So I havenʼt had orgasm in three months, which is making me badly want to fuck the locals. The other day I was checking out a hot Maya chick, and the thought of putting a baby in her made me hard right there in the store! I kept trying to approach, but somehow in spite of intense desire, the inhibition still won. Itʼs driving me out of my mind!
Population Problems
I think I know why the vast increase in the fraction of women I like has not relaxed the inhibition much: 50% of 7,000 chicks is actually a much smaller number than 7% of a million chicks! This is partly why Kampala is still a priority: 60% of 825,000 chicks is a number vastly larger than either of those!
Going from my home city to this little town, my opportunity frequency actually hasnʼt changed much. Iʼve just traded seeing many chicks I donʼt like for seeing fewer chicks. Both here and back home, it takes several minutes to run into one chick I like.
For contrast, I have seen Go Pro videos of downtown Kampala streets. In one, I counted two hundred and eighty at‑least fuckable chicks in 29 minutes. That is a degree of abundance that neither my home city nor this little Central American town even begins to approach.
And then thereʼs the reduced anonymity. Coming from a major city, I feel less safe here to hit on a woman randomly. Almost like the whole town is watching me.
Of course, thatʼs just the inhibition talking. Just like it talks when thereʼs more than one chick together. Or a cop nearby. Or when the opener I had in mind all of a sudden seems dumb. Or when the girl ahead of me turns down some small street and itʼs going to seem creepy if I do, too. Or when the girl looks young and I donʼt know how to deduce a girlʼs age here.
I do suspect population affects inhibition. A few years ago I visited a country where I also kind of liked the female aesthetics, and in spite of spending far less time there, with almost no day game experience, no sexual experience, and a language barrier, I actually managed to do one day game cold approach. Well, thatʼs one more than Iʼve done here, even after vastly more time spent trying and much better preparation. But that was a city of a million, whereas this is a town of 14,000.
The frustrating thing is, there are enough women I like here, and Iʼm exotic enough to them, that I could get pussy easily — if only I would approach. Likewise, I could get pussy easily in my home city, even in spite of only going for a minority — if only I would approach.
Other Problems
These are things I need to play with, but playing is hard when youʼre so inhibited. Missing skills in turn only add back to the inhibition. It doesnʼt help that clear opportunities to play are only sporadic, not rapid‑fire.
A Difficult Choice
Iʼm really torn right now. On one hand, I desire the chicks here, and being closed‑off sexually isnʼt healthy. On the other hand, I am afraid that I will just spin my wheels — as I did for years back home — just wandering around chickening out.
To be clear, Iʼm moving regardless. The question is whether to just focus on the move totally, or continue to devote a portion of my time to wandering around the town trying to push myself to approach chicks here. Doing so consumes significant time that would have made the move happen sooner, so there is a trade‑off between reaching Kampala faster but ignoring women in the meantime, or not ignoring women, but taking longer to be surrounded by much larger numbers of them.
In part it depends on timing: the longer Iʼll be here, the more important it is to try to get sex here.
Iʼd guess I may be here anywhere from 1 to 5 months. It will tend towards the longer end if I keep trying to approach. It also depends on how well I put my ducks in a row before I venture to Kampala. A cautious strategy could be many months; “Just do it,” could happen in a few weeks or so, if I stop trying to chase tail here.
Itʼs worth noting that, girls aside, I am frequently running into needless practical hiccups from living here instead of Kampala. Well, blowing time wandering around chickening out is prolonging these irritating and wasteful situations.
“Just approach the chicks you happen to see incidentally,” is a suggestion I expect may come up, because itʼs logical and low-cost. Unfortunately, approach inhibition is far too entrenched in me for that to work. In my experience, I can only push myself to approach on lengthy outings where I am completely focussed on doing so. More positive experiences may fix that, but not in the short term.
I would hate to significantly delay my move to Africa over Central American pussy, only to not get any anyway because I couldnʼt shake the approach inhibition with such limited population.
So, what do you think? Keep spending time pushing myself to approach here? Or just focus on moving sooner? Any other suggestions or feedback also welcome. Thanks for reading!
Travels
Two months ago, I fled my Western nation, due to the Westʼs increasing political extremism. (Stay tuned for follow‑up in the “something bigger than COVID” thread.) I wound up temporarily in Central America, in a town of 14,000 people.
I could stay here indefinitely, but the plan is to continue on to Kampala, a city of 1.7 million in Uganda. I really want to live in East Africa. But there are some things I need to handle first, which Iʼm trying to do from my temporary home here in Central America.
Background
I spent two decades avoiding women, for various stupid and deluded reasons. Smartened up and came to a solid understanding, but unfortunately an introverted nature compounded by many years of near‑total avoidance left me with debilitating approach inhibition.
In my home city, the inhibition was exacerbated by my obstinate desire to touch nothing but black women, who make up not even 10% of my cityʼs females. Looking at 90% of the women around you as though they donʼt even have a pussy, makes approaching the remainder really intimidating. I would spend a whole day at a busy megamall, around thousands of women and hundreds of black women, yet only manage to approach one or two. Over time those one or two cumulatively did get me laid, but it took forever, which led to fatal performance anxiety.
Opening up to other races would have been a logical solution, but I wasnʼt having it at all, so instead I decided to move to a city where most of the women are black, anyway.
Alas, practicality kept that on the back burner for several years, until finally a draconian vaccine mandate trumped practicality.
Opening Up
As for Central America, I was not expecting to fancy the chicks here; I had assumed they mostly all had the stereotypical Latina look. But I was wrong!
For one, girls that are at least part-black are a way larger fraction than in my home city. Most are mixed, but these can be quite beautiful, especially mixtures with the Mezzo‑American “natives.” I also happen to be in a pocket where those natives themselves are still quite common: the Maya, who built all those crazy pyramid temples. Some even speak Maya! Well, I thought I only liked black girls, until I saw Maya chicks.
And so I am now open to a fairly large chunk of the women around me — a stark contrast to my home city!
I still love African women way more. And there are other advantages to living in Kampala. So I donʼt plan to stay in Central America indefinitely. But Iʼd really like to sleep with some girls here while Iʼm here.
Iʼm almost as exotic to these Central American chicks as they are to me, and Iʼve caught some noticing me. A couple even coyly said “hi” after they saw me looking. Oh, man, so much potential!
I initially figured that my newfound openness would ease the approach inhibition. To that end, I asked myself to look at even Mestiza, the least exotic chicks common here.
I also did a very good thing from day one: I made a point to greet people on the street. I come from a very introverted city, so this was quite alien for me, but Iʼve been doing it anyway. Back home, I usually didnʼt have the balls, but here it is not as difficult. Not that people here greet all the time, but they also donʼt have this stunned, “oh, my God, this random guy is talking to me” look. I made a point to randomly greet people because it would make it more natural to randomly greet women.
As a result, I have randomly greeted more attractive chicks here in one month than I did in several years back home.
Alas, this has not led to actually hitting on chicks. It has just moved the inhibition from step 1 to step 2. Iʼve planned some good routines, but after wandering around for hours on a number of occasions, so far I havenʼt been able to push myself to even take it past a mere greeting.
Motivation is certainly not the issue. I decided not to masturbate in Africa, and so far I havenʼt masturbated in Central America, either.
So I havenʼt had orgasm in three months, which is making me badly want to fuck the locals. The other day I was checking out a hot Maya chick, and the thought of putting a baby in her made me hard right there in the store! I kept trying to approach, but somehow in spite of intense desire, the inhibition still won. Itʼs driving me out of my mind!
Population Problems
I think I know why the vast increase in the fraction of women I like has not relaxed the inhibition much: 50% of 7,000 chicks is actually a much smaller number than 7% of a million chicks! This is partly why Kampala is still a priority: 60% of 825,000 chicks is a number vastly larger than either of those!
Going from my home city to this little town, my opportunity frequency actually hasnʼt changed much. Iʼve just traded seeing many chicks I donʼt like for seeing fewer chicks. Both here and back home, it takes several minutes to run into one chick I like.
For contrast, I have seen Go Pro videos of downtown Kampala streets. In one, I counted two hundred and eighty at‑least fuckable chicks in 29 minutes. That is a degree of abundance that neither my home city nor this little Central American town even begins to approach.
And then thereʼs the reduced anonymity. Coming from a major city, I feel less safe here to hit on a woman randomly. Almost like the whole town is watching me.
Of course, thatʼs just the inhibition talking. Just like it talks when thereʼs more than one chick together. Or a cop nearby. Or when the opener I had in mind all of a sudden seems dumb. Or when the girl ahead of me turns down some small street and itʼs going to seem creepy if I do, too. Or when the girl looks young and I donʼt know how to deduce a girlʼs age here.
I do suspect population affects inhibition. A few years ago I visited a country where I also kind of liked the female aesthetics, and in spite of spending far less time there, with almost no day game experience, no sexual experience, and a language barrier, I actually managed to do one day game cold approach. Well, thatʼs one more than Iʼve done here, even after vastly more time spent trying and much better preparation. But that was a city of a million, whereas this is a town of 14,000.
The frustrating thing is, there are enough women I like here, and Iʼm exotic enough to them, that I could get pussy easily — if only I would approach. Likewise, I could get pussy easily in my home city, even in spite of only going for a minority — if only I would approach.
Other Problems
- In this town Iʼm in, facemasks have to be worn even outdoors, and theyʼre strict about it, so compliance is high. That really limits subtle body language. In my home city, I found that facemasks vastly amplified my inhibition. (The Western publicʼs overall COVID paranoia was no doubt also a factor.) Kampala, by contrast, has had some mask mandates, but last I checked, compliance was fairly low.
- Most of the approaches Iʼve ever done in past have been in shopping malls or supermarkets. But stores here are typically small, cramped, and watched closely by the owner, so Iʼve felt it wiser to try to do street approaching, but this is quite unfamiliar to me. Street approaching will probably be preferable in Africa, too, so I need to get used to it.
- Chicks on bicycles are a challenge — especially when theyʼre passing from behind, — and I see them regularly here.
These are things I need to play with, but playing is hard when youʼre so inhibited. Missing skills in turn only add back to the inhibition. It doesnʼt help that clear opportunities to play are only sporadic, not rapid‑fire.
A Difficult Choice
Iʼm really torn right now. On one hand, I desire the chicks here, and being closed‑off sexually isnʼt healthy. On the other hand, I am afraid that I will just spin my wheels — as I did for years back home — just wandering around chickening out.
To be clear, Iʼm moving regardless. The question is whether to just focus on the move totally, or continue to devote a portion of my time to wandering around the town trying to push myself to approach chicks here. Doing so consumes significant time that would have made the move happen sooner, so there is a trade‑off between reaching Kampala faster but ignoring women in the meantime, or not ignoring women, but taking longer to be surrounded by much larger numbers of them.
In part it depends on timing: the longer Iʼll be here, the more important it is to try to get sex here.
Iʼd guess I may be here anywhere from 1 to 5 months. It will tend towards the longer end if I keep trying to approach. It also depends on how well I put my ducks in a row before I venture to Kampala. A cautious strategy could be many months; “Just do it,” could happen in a few weeks or so, if I stop trying to chase tail here.
Itʼs worth noting that, girls aside, I am frequently running into needless practical hiccups from living here instead of Kampala. Well, blowing time wandering around chickening out is prolonging these irritating and wasteful situations.
“Just approach the chicks you happen to see incidentally,” is a suggestion I expect may come up, because itʼs logical and low-cost. Unfortunately, approach inhibition is far too entrenched in me for that to work. In my experience, I can only push myself to approach on lengthy outings where I am completely focussed on doing so. More positive experiences may fix that, but not in the short term.
I would hate to significantly delay my move to Africa over Central American pussy, only to not get any anyway because I couldnʼt shake the approach inhibition with such limited population.
So, what do you think? Keep spending time pushing myself to approach here? Or just focus on moving sooner? Any other suggestions or feedback also welcome. Thanks for reading!
