I had a weak foundation and not sure what I want out of life anymore.

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

Kind of a long post here which I will try to keep as short as possible, maybe this is not a site where I get the answer to this and maybe it is a question I never get the resolution for in my life.

The short story of Oh Pry:

I had a very unstable childhood, parents divorced and then I moved around a lot and then they got back together. Never really in one place for too long. Born in California and went to a high school that may as well be featured on WorldStar lol. Overbearing parents at home and wild classmates to deal with in class. Needless to say, never had the high school experience and I could have lived with that.

The college years start, where the long-lasting damage happens:

Started off the Community College route due to mentally sick mother with attachment issues. After 2 years or so, transfer to a top 10 party school on the east coast since I was sick and tired of California. Tried to make friends and fit in socially, failed. Failed to make decent enough friends, often socially rejected from the guys who were getting laid, and actually didn't get laid all that much outside of maybe a handful of times.

Years after college, Oh Pry takes off in a big way and things start to come together:

So after college, I really hit my stride. I ended up sleeping with well over 100 different women, had some wild experiences, slowly made a handful of friends, and started doing more fun things. I probably drank and partied more in my 20s after college than I ever did in college.

At one point I did have what I wanted, a decent enough group of friends and that was starting to go enough places. The issue became that a lot of my friends I did make moved on from NYC and got tired of the life here. A lot of them moved to more calm cities and settled into LTR life. My friends who do stay in the city are often traveling all over the world since they have money to spend and prefer not to be in one city for too long.

Here comes the very thing that's been bothering me forever and has taken up a lot of time in my head....

I guess I see it on the outside looking in but I saw a select number of college kids, mainly Greek Life but also other groups, who had big groups they were a part of. Girls in groups heading out with a couple of guys and I wanted something like that. Like a group of guys who all seemed to be successful and had women going out with them or girls they could call up at anytime.

Like getting laid and having fun are important for me but I want to feel like I am a part of something.

I want to have a @Franco @Chase @Hue @Grand Pooba or other guys who I pull with and then after years, have those crazy stories to share with. I want to be able to have a group of friends to show up to events with hot girls and be able to be a part of that big group.

It feels unnatural, like people did this when they were in school and somehow I want to do it afterwards but it has been eating me.

It's like I got to the point in game where getting laid was not enough, I had to build something through game and seduction....

It's gonna be a while before I post another thread but I know I have a weak social foundation that I am trying to solve through game..

 

[Carousel]

To me it seems that you are trying to patch more basal insecurities from your formative years with ever-so wilder stories in your adult life. This will not work because you are not addressing the actual issue.

In my country, I have seen statistics saying that only 2.5% of men have had more than 100 sex partners. The US is probably similar in this respect.

So that is probably NOT where you are lacking, in fact you probably have more wild stories than 97.5% of men or something around that. A couple of the guys you mentioned have stated on in public on this forum to have less than 100 lays, by the way.

 

[Fluxcapacitor]

@Carousel dude I think @Oh Pry wants a social group. It's not sexual adventures he craves but a friendship group to share it with. I think he feels isolated and wanting friends. He says how his friends moved out for an LTR, a calmer life or travel and judging on older posts he worries no one wants the same as he does after 30.

My main question is what's stopping you from making friends? Your people are out the dude but seduction won't find them. Game or whatever will give you social skills you can use.

I posted before to another one of your threads saying if you want female friends you might have to sacrifice bedding them. This is still true.

I'm sure with 100 lays you must be able to retain a couple. If you're fwbs with some start building a social circle with them. You may need an mltr to enable this but you can still meet other girls if seduction still is what you want.

I think you're trying to fix your past trying to become a popular college kid. Those days are gone dude and it's not the be all and end all. I forget the other members name that always posted about the college experience. It's a myth. The grass seems greener, you said yourself these guys hardly got laid.

If you want people to have stories with and memories go and make friends dude. Remember some people will stay a long time and others gone instantly. If you can be dedicated to 100 different girls you have dedication to meet friends dude!

 

[Fluxcapacitor]

If getting laid isn't enough and you want a sense of belonging you either need a girl or girls that are obsessed with you or a friendship group....

It sounds like a girl longing for a child though dude

 

[Tony D]

Men are the most content and fulfilled when they have a clear goal, and they're actively moving towards it. For many guys it's not the getting laid with beautiful women that fulfills them, it's the actualization of their life vision: Study game, go out, apply lessons, over come, achieve.

My advice, just search for a new calling. It might be to build a like minded group of peers.

I'm quite lonely in the same way as you. That's why I'm going to Mexico soon, and then down through the Americas to Colombia. I'm going to meet other digital nomads, entrepreneurs, and work on a new Youtube channel aimed around travel.

You need to create that life. If you don't know what it is, you'll definitely be miserable.

 

[Razorjack]

Men are the most content and fulfilled when they have a clear goal, and they're actively moving towards it. For many guys it's not the getting laid with beautiful women that fulfills them, it's the actualization of their life vision: Study game, go out, apply lessons, over come, achieve.

My advice, just search for a new calling. It might be to build a like minded group of peers.

I'm quite lonely in the same way as you. That's why I'm going to Mexico soon, and then down through the Americas to Colombia. I'm going to meet other digital nomads, entrepreneurs, and work on a new Youtube channel aimed around travel.

You need to create that life. If you don't know what it is, you'll definitely be miserable.

This, this and this!

Well said, this has also been my experience. The problems for me came when pickup took too much priority in my life.

I had to create a vision of how I wanted my life to be, strive after it and turn it into a reality.

Good luck on your trips down to Mexico and the Americas.

Just a word of advice: build your online business first before you travel, your business should generate enough money to support your traveling lifestyle so that you are comfortable.

Also and this is me personally, I prefer to be an expat (living in a foreign country for months/years) instead of a nomad hopping around from one place to another every week. Constantly traveling from one place to another can take a toll on you physically as well as mentally with all of the practical details that need to be planned ahead of times and the stress of when things don't go according to plan (delayed flights, trains, emergency medical care, passports, visas, needing to find a place to stay in a town that you didn't plan on being in, finding an internet connection due to a business emergency etc).

 

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

To me it seems that you are trying to patch more basal insecurities from your formative years with ever-so wilder stories in your adult life. This will not work because you are not addressing the actual issue.

In my country, I have seen statistics saying that only 2.5% of men have had more than 100 sex partners. The US is probably similar in this respect.

So that is probably NOT where you are lacking, in fact you probably have more wild stories than 97.5% of men or something around that. A couple of the guys you mentioned have stated on in public on this forum to have less than 100 lays, by the way.

So what should I be doing to address this then? I know pickup and sex alone are not the answer.

 

[Carousel]

So what should I be doing to address this then? I know pickup and sex alone are not the answer.

Post #3 by Fluxcapacitor is probably spot on.

 

[Tony D]

This, this and this!

Well said, this has also been my experience. The problems for me came when pickup took too much priority in my life.

I had to create a vision of how I wanted my life to be, strive after it and turn it into a reality.

Good luck on your trips down to Mexico and the Americas.

Just a word of advice: build your online business first before you travel, your business should generate enough money to support your traveling lifestyle so that you are comfortable.

Also and this is me personally, I prefer to be an expat (living in a foreign country for months/years) instead of a nomad hopping around from one place to another every week. Constantly traveling from one place to another can take a toll on you physically as well as mentally with all of the practical details that need to be planned ahead of times and the stress of when things don't go according to plan (delayed flights, trains, emergency medical care, passports, visas, needing to find a place to stay in a town that you didn't plan on being in, finding an internet connection due to a business emergency etc).

Oh thanks. Actually I've been self-employed as a dating consultant/coach for over ten years. I'm also a freelance writer (I work for GC). Been nomading full time for over a year now. 19 countries so far. But I'm working to optimize it all, open up new possibilities. I'm Zardoz from the old forums.

 

[Skills]

@Carousel dude I think @Oh Pry wants a social group. It's not sexual adventures he craves but a friendship group to share it with. I think he feels isolated and wanting friends. He says how his friends moved out for an LTR, a calmer life or travel and judging on older posts he worries no one wants the same as he does after 30.

My main question is what's stopping you from making friends? Your people are out the dude but seduction won't find them. Game or whatever will give you social skills you can use.

I posted before to another one of your threads saying if you want female friends you might have to sacrifice bedding them. This is still true.

I'm sure with 100 lays you must be able to retain a couple. If you're fwbs with some start building a social circle with them. You may need an mltr to enable this but you can still meet other girls if seduction still is what you want.

I think you're trying to fix your past trying to become a popular college kid. Those days are gone dude and it's not the be all and end all. I forget the other members name that always posted about the college experience. It's a myth. The grass seems greener, you said yourself these guys hardly got laid.

If you want people to have stories with and memories go and make friends dude. Remember some people will stay a long time and others gone instantly. If you can be dedicated to 100 different girls you have dedication to meet friends dude!

Interesting take, this explain the posting behavior this may be right on... @Oh Pry what are your interest in life other than pic up? dancing? marital arts? animals? cars? fitness?

 

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

Good shit as always crew, especially @Fluxcapacitor and I did think more about it.

It's been something bugging me for a while and now come to think of it, it is not that making friends is hard, it is just that in many ways success with women and pickup is a huge part of my life purpose. I find it tough to make friend groups that either help to or contribute to that without getting in the way. On one hand I can make friends but they come from avenues where being good with women or going out on weekends is looked down upon.

I find it tough overtime to invest in those friendships because they do not speak to my life purpose and what I am about. In my profession, the people are the self-righteous self-improvement gospel types that annoy me. It gets on my nerves as I am still in party mode in life and cannot relate to these people who are in grown-up along with marriage and kids mode. I kind of want someone who is in young Hugh Hefner and Dan Bilzerian or young @Chase mode.

It's like the group I am wanting to be with centers around what I am passionate about which is going out, meeting women, partying, and having those fun stories to look back on.

@Skills

Great you mentioned man. I am big on photography so that is a huge hobby and kind of big on sports too due to the competitive nature of it. To be frank with you man, my passion does revolve around social dynamics and always thinking of ways in which I can put myself in a social position of power over women. Think model scout or deciding who gets to enter a quality nightclub with a long wait in line, lol now that is what makes me feel good.

I am also an avid writer but the more I think of the future, I think of basing my life around sexuality. Like model photography, sex, writing about seduction after having had success, and finding new avenues to it. In some ways this has become such an obsession for me that other avenuess in my life have to tie into.

Now I think of business ideas which can get me rich while also helping me get laid.....

 

[Skills]

Good shit as always crew, especially @Fluxcapacitor and I did think more about it.

It's been something bugging me for a while and now come to think of it, it is not that making friends is hard, it is just that in many ways success with women and pickup is a huge part of my life purpose. I find it tough to make friend groups that either help to or contribute to that without getting in the way. On one hand I can make friends but they come from avenues where being good with women or going out on weekends is looked down upon.

I find it tough overtime to invest in those friendships because they do not speak to my life purpose and what I am about. In my profession, the people are the self-righteous self-improvement gospel types that annoy me. It gets on my nerves as I am still in party mode in life and cannot relate to these people who are in grown-up along with marriage and kids mode. I kind of want someone who is in young Hugh Hefner and Dan Bilzerian or young @Chase mode.

It's like the group I am wanting to be with centers around what I am passionate about which is going out, meeting women, partying, and having those fun stories to look back on.

@Skills

Great you mentioned man. I am big on photography so that is a huge hobby and kind of big on sports too due to the competitive nature of it. To be frank with you man, my passion does revolve around social dynamics and always thinking of ways in which I can put myself in a social position of power over women. Think model scout or deciding who gets to enter a quality nightclub with a long wait in line, lol now that is what makes me feel good.

I am also an avid writer but the more I think of the future, I think of basing my life around sexuality. Like model photography, sex, writing about seduction after having had success, and finding new avenues to it. In some ways this has become such an obsession for me that other avenuess in my life have to tie into.

Now I think of business ideas which can get me rich while also helping me get laid.....

Alright so now it makes sense to me why you are so repetitive in the "getting old" 50 type post....

So yes, hedonism/pick up/player lifestyle it is a lonely road, cause people will eventually settle down, get married and have kids so they have to either abandon that part of their life, block it, remember the good old days or look the other way.

You need to compartmentalize regular life and then pick up.... How i resolve the issue you are having was joining seduction forums cause at some points I felt like that.... You will have to outsource this virtually which is not what you want (i miss my old forums, or you can join a facebook group or community virtually), unless you join a lair(if they are still around and develop friendship with the best guys) but they will eventually abandone the pick up stage as well...

I think what you want is too complex and you should reconsider your goals/mission, cause even the top seducers get out eventually.. I am totally like you and experience what you talk about, i do still take over every social group but people see me as "that guy" "skills is crazy a mofo" and that is it they just accept but they do not participate or we talk pick up unless they request some type of help usually break up, pregnancy shit like that...

 

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

Seems like the road to every great endeavor is ultimately a lonely one.

 

[Sub-Zero]

Alright so now it makes sense to me why you are so repetitive in the "getting old" 50 type post....

So yes, hedonism/pick up/player lifestyle it is a lonely road, cause people will eventually settle down, get married and have kids so they have to either abandon that part of their life, block it, remember the good old days or look the other way.

You need to compartmentalize regular life and then pick up.... How i resolve the issue you are having was joining seduction forums cause at some points I felt like that.... You will have to outsource this virtually which is not what you want (i miss my old forums, or you can join a facebook group or community virtually), unless you join a lair(if they are still around and develop friendship with the best guys) but they will eventually abandone the pick up stage as well...

I think what you want is too complex and you should reconsider your goals/mission, cause even the top seducers get out eventually.. I am totally like you and experience what you talk about, i do still take over every social group but people see me as "that guy" "skills is crazy a mofo" and that is it they just accept but they do not participate or we talk pick up unless they request some type of help usually break up, pregnancy shit like that...

Around what age does it really become a problem though? Is it 40s where you start to feel that loneliness and want to start a family? Does the guy feel that way himself or is he too old too continue pickup and can’t get attraction at that time?

And does the player lifestyle really get old? I know dudes that are and were players in their 40s, 50s, sometimes 60s still messing with different women, even though were in a relationship and married with a family.

Chase also has said that after a certain amount of time and experience in pick up or being a player, the guy never fully settles down 100%, he still messes around here and there and I have seen that too as well.

Is this something really to worry about?

I have thoughts about age, but it isn’t about society or not fitting in with them, it’s the attraction I worry about, with age I worry about attraction and not being able to do well at all with attracting many women.

I want to always be able to attract women forever, that’s my main goal, I want options and abundance.

 

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

I think that unlike being younger where you know girls will love you for your looks, with age you need to overcompensate for more. You have to have status or wealth, it is why the older guys I see cleaning house are owners of the club or in model photography. You almost have to live with the fact that you will need money and she will go for you for things other than your looks while for younger men, your bargaining chips are your looks.

 

[Grand Pooba]

Check these out:

When Do You Get Too Old to Party or Meet Girls?

At some point, you can’t go to the club or the frat party anymore. But when do you get to old to party? And can you ever get too old to meet girls? Contents 1. The Right Mindset as You Age Too Young/Old to Get Girls? The Correct Mindset to Have 2. Choice Venues, by Men’s Age Frat Parties...

www.girlschase.com

12 Things Every Man Should Have Handled by Age 35

There’s a lot to focus on in life, and little guidance. Where should you concentrate your efforts? To these 12 key areas: women, money, strategy, and more. Contents 1. Dates and Pickup 2. Romantic Relationships 3. Monetizable Skills 4. Positive Net Worth 5. Productive Habits 6. A Tight-Knit...

www.girlschase.com

I think that unlike being younger where you know girls will love you for your looks, with age you need to overcompensate for more.

It's not "overcompensate," it just means you should have life handled. Girls don't want to date a 35 year old guy with the maturity and resources of a 21 year old. It also depends - if you're going for pure lover with a girl, she might not care as long as you're attractive.

 

[Indian Race Troll (IRT)]

Muh boy Grand Pooba, yo, fine weather outside in the city homie so I am about to bounce in a bit.

All that aside, that's the thing man, I have read those articles multiple times and am still lost.

 

[Sub-Zero]

Check these out:

When Do You Get Too Old to Party or Meet Girls?

At some point, you can’t go to the club or the frat party anymore. But when do you get to old to party? And can you ever get too old to meet girls? Contents 1. The Right Mindset as You Age Too Young/Old to Get Girls? The Correct Mindset to Have 2. Choice Venues, by Men’s Age Frat Parties...

www.girlschase.com

12 Things Every Man Should Have Handled by Age 35

There’s a lot to focus on in life, and little guidance. Where should you concentrate your efforts? To these 12 key areas: women, money, strategy, and more. Contents 1. Dates and Pickup 2. Romantic Relationships 3. Monetizable Skills 4. Positive Net Worth 5. Productive Habits 6. A Tight-Knit...

www.girlschase.com

It's not "overcompensate," it just means you should have life handled. Girls don't want to date a 35 year old guy with the maturity and resources of a 21 year old. It also depends - if you're going for pure lover with a girl, she might not care as long as you're attractive.

But what does having life handled and having resources really mean when it comes to pickup?

When you tell a person who doesn’t read the site that you need to have resources, they automatically think they can only attract women with them and be a provider.

I also read on the forums that many dudes in pick up do not make a lot of money, not saying you have to, but it’s like how much money are you supposed to really have by 35?

Age confuses me so much in this site because I’ll never forget the article about age where Chase says that by 33/34 you need to be high up in your job, have a business, or be retired.

When you hear that, that doesn’t sound like regular money, it sounds like 100k plus a year money, which sounds like money and career matter a lot in the dating world as you get older.

If you’re a lover why do you need to be exceptional at a somewhat young age? I can see 40s, but I think early and mid 30s is still young enough to not be there yet.

Then you have articles that come out saying you can date while broke and it’s not too late to pick up women, etc.

Those articles sound like they are for men in all age ranges to use, but then you read the other articles and it sounds like you need money and a decent career to get women after a certain age.

So what is it? By a certain age you need money to do well in pick up or can you actually get good enough with pick up without money even if you’re older like some articles say?

So it all gets confusing, like how much money do you really need to be making by 35 to continue to have success in is the real honest question.

 

[Velasco]

But what does having life handled and having resources really mean when it comes to pickup?

When you tell a person who doesn’t read the site that you need to have resources, they automatically think they can only attract women with them and be a provider.

I also read on the forums that many dudes in pick up do not make a lot of money, not saying you have to, but it’s like how much money are you supposed to really have by 35?

Grand Pooba said girls do not want to DATE a broke ass 35 year old. They will still FUCK said 35 year old if he's attractive (https://www.skilledseducer.com/thre...one-skill-to-rule-them-all.22502/#post-112370)

how much money do you really need to be making by 35 to continue to have success in is the real honest question.

enough where your not living paycheck to paycheck anymore

 

[Sub-Zero]

Grand Pooba said girls do not want to DATE a broke ass 35 year old. They will still FUCK said 35 year old if he's attractive (https://www.skilledseducer.com/thre...one-skill-to-rule-them-all.22502/#post-112370)



enough where your not living paycheck to paycheck anymore

Ok gotcha