the thought “lol he’s trying to get things sexual between us by talking about it” should not occur in her head if the mating ritual was followed. therefore if that is what she’s thinking when you begin to talk about sex. it’s a matter of her not actually being attracted to you (misreading her signals) or your flirting leading up to sex talk was off. a mix of either being too cocky or too boring.
Yep I get that.
I’ve probably done it with girls that were only social but were spending time with me. I suppose I still feel there is a way to get her into you if she does spend time with you, but maybe this needs you to be even more indirect working with social proof and preselection a lot.
I’ve also gotten girls on dates though who are clearly into me that give the vibe that talking about sex is not very comfortable for them. They give very short comments and change the subject fast, and it feels like I am too stubborn if I keep trying to talk about sex.
Maybe these are cases of “I won’t sleep with him tonight to not be easy”, but if I want to break through that, I have to use some anti ASD frames from sex talk, and it can end up feeling like: “he is really trying to talk about sex isn’t he, he is so focused on that”.
I agree that in general though it’s better to set some sexual frames at the right pace.
The one time I have decided to not do it almost at all is if I have a short date where I know I cannot close by the end.
If I go into sexual topics then, it really feels to the girl that next time she is probably expected to sleep with me and it creates more friction.