Surveying the Topography

[Surveyor]

Tbh I’m starting to doubt my ability to take on the additional academic objectives that need to be done in the next few days, but I feel they’re necessary if I want to have my pick of top transfer destinations.

Yeah, probably not happening.
This is a blow. It hurts.
But let’s be honest: I was already drowning in deadlines and unfinished business.
The main lesson: I need to move out ASAP. Working on it
Other lessons:
- Don’t waste time and energy on things that don’t deserve my attention.
- Schedule tasks. Leave buffers.
- I need to take care of my sexual and emotional needs. It’ll help.

Freedom is just around the corner. Or is it?

I know you're going to keep sticking to the game!! Keep your eyes on the prize!

Stay tuned for tomorrow then

 

[sunflowergirl04]

It doesn't matter, progress is progress, even if not visibly that measurable at first it will add up. If you haven't read it I recommend the book 'The Power of Atomic Habits' by James Clear, he gives an example of an airplane taking flight and how it can arrive at a completely different destination even with a one degree tilt! Anyways, I am so glad that you are journaling about the bolded below, it shows how you're able to grow into a successful and well rounded young man. Even by journaling what you are PLANNING to do even if it's not done right away, your brain will already get to work in solving that puzzle!

I've made significant progress in several areas, but no real breakthroughs.

• Finances/moving out: I've been delaying invoicing pay and stuff in order to optimize my FAFSA numbers, lol. In a few days, that should go well. No progress on apartments but one thing at a time.
• My parents' finances are likely to improve in a few months rather than at the end of the year due to unexpected events.
• SC growth: Marginal improvements. Much more in the pipeline.
• Fitness: Fat loss and other improvements continue. Medium-term improvements to skills-based fitness likely. I'm also taking a pretty rigorous PE class. Intending to plan some serious outdoor day trips soon.
• State management: Sleep is improving. Other aspects either improving (e.g. screens, drive) or likely to improve soon (focus). I managed a 4-day streak, which is progress, and also definitely improved my capacity for non-ejaculatory orgasms and general energy handling. Last night, I also did some deep hypnagogic meditation, which was relaxing and interesting.
• Academics: Main goals are trying to complete work sooner and further from deadlines, and generating the headspace and time to work on a scholarship essay contest and my pitch for UC undergrad research, the latter opportunity thanks to my mentor (who totally has a crush on me). I need to realize that not meeting these objectives will have costs.
• Overall organization etc.: ...it's early days yet lol. But I'm making measurable improvements.

 

[Surveyor]

The past week was…eventful, to say the least. I’m definitely making significant progress game wise.
But in several other areas of my life, I’ve gone a bridge too far. Stabilizing the situation won’t be easy.
And the situation at home is quietly becoming unsustainable.
Worst of all, the can can’t be kicked down the road any further. Actually, there are dozens of cans (tasks, goals, etc.) that are reaching that point.
If I can make it through the next three weeks and achieve or hold all the really essential objectives, it’ll be all right.
Right at this moment, I don’t know how that will all work.
But in certain ways, the current situation is worse than any previous point in my life. And the stakes are certainly a little higher than they were, say, a year ago.

Back to game. It might be hard to find a partner until I’m past this rough patch. But I’m doing what I can.

Nothing to do but keep going…


Edit: OK, that was kinda doom and gloom. Both Surveyor himself and his overall situation are better than ever in many ways.
That doesn’t necessarily mean I’ll be able to meet the challenge. Things have to be done both correctly and rapidly.
The home front badly needs attention, but so do academics and business.
And the cumulative stress is getting to me.

Maybe I’ll feel more confident in the morning. Doubtful, though. Sundays at home with the family are always unpleasant, and I won’t get a chance to sleep in.

 

[Surveyor]

I’m still basically at the start line when it comes to SC game, despite noticeably improving my overall social skills.

This is frustrating. In the short term, I’m not really sure what to do about it, besides the things that I’m already doing.

It doesn’t help that I’m looking at things through the lens of being so horny that I can blow 2-3 times a day without taking a significant hit.

 

[Surveyor]

The “Hillary Step moment” continues. So close, and yet so far.

I feel like my internal state is affecting my vibe. All I want is peace of mind and distance from the stressors. Is that too much to ask?

It doesn’t help that I’m taking concrete steps toward completely committing to the path of the seducer. I don’t believe there’s a choice tbh. But it still feels…not quite right. Especially as more feelings are involved right now than at any point in the past.

 

[Surveyor]

Meeting girls seems to be helping. Put on a new set of clothes, introduced myself to a classmate/club member, ran a cold approach with a girl who seemed very vaguely familiar (I guess that opener really works lol), and am chatting in DMs with another girl online.

 

[Surveyor]

Academics have temporarily collapsed but I think I can get it excused.
Fitness continues to improve but it’s time to prioritize it more.
I think the storm is passing. Time to hustle and move out!

As far as game…progress continues. Averaging 5 approaches per week. Gonna see if I can increase that to 10-12 or more. Hard to find quality girls without volume.
I think it’s high time I made a serious effort to score

 

[Surveyor]

As I tried and failed to fall asleep this evening, I realized something.
I've gotten a respectable number of green lights (most of them unsolicited) from girls at college in the past six months.
So why haven't I done something about that? Logistics plays a role. There's more to it than that, of course.

But first, let's do some numbers:
Fall 2022
5 green lights (3 classmates, 2 outside class)

Excuses for not closing:
a) Inability or unwillingness to build sufficient rapport etc.: 2 (both fairly similar cases)
b) Wild cards, insufficient investment from both sides, and impending personal difficulties: 1
c) Not interested in having sex with her: 2 (also similar to each other) + 1 under a)

These were only the obvious cases. There may have been others where I didn't fully understand where things stood.


Spring 2023
2 green lights so far (both classmates)

I don't intend to pursue either of them, despite having just gone through a period of extreme horniness, and obviously wanting feminine solace for emotional reasons as well.

One of them I simply find unappetizing, although last class I had the first convo of any length with her and she seems like a decent person. But, among other things, she was wearing ridiculous edgy thigh highs that left impressions and showed me that I wasn't missing much. Just not my type.

The other is all right personality and looks wise, and seems to be interested in me (altho that might expire), but we haven't vibed that much and I don't feel comfortable with her for some reason (actually might post a thread because it's interesting). If I was an experienced seducer, I'd probably go ahead anyway though because why not?


As someone said recently here, most young studs do as many ugly or otherwise unappealing girls as beautiful ones.

That's not who I am. I don't think it ever will be. I don't see a point wasting time, energy, attention, and vulnerability on people of any gender who aren't worth it.


Moving on...
I think this is my main non-logistics sticking point actually. I screen a lot for intangibles, personality, etc. And for now, I'm screening pretty tightly. No plans to change that.

Now, obviously there are several girls I'm interested in (even with "post-nut clarity"), and legions more whom I haven't met yet. But those aren't the type who are going to pursue me (at least until I've made another year or so of progress in all areas).

Which means I have to learn how to pursue better. And I'm learning. I'd like to learn faster. But I'm still hamstrung by logistics and my personal life is chaotic right now (at least my state is OK).

In three or four weeks, I hope to have gotten my act together and finally be on the right track. Progress continues, but the going isn't easy.

And when I've built a base and a baseline that are actually satisfactory, it will only make all those hotties wetter down there.

For now, nose to the grindstone. I'm making progress with retention (relative to the winter, anyway). Other areas are good. In general, the short-term outlook is still in flux, but the long-term indicators just keep improving.

I want nothing more than to be sleeping soundly in a sorority bedroom after a threesome right now. But...There. Is. No. Free. Lunch. I'm not like the AFCs who fail to understand that. All in good time...